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The ravings of a sea sick sailor...

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Does life really go on?

Tomorrow will be the two month anniversary of my Mom's death. I'm familiar with the stages, or steps, of the grief process, but it still doesn't seem to get any easier as each day goes by. "It'll get easier with time." If I hear that again I think I'll scream! Somehow at the moment that just doesn't seem to be the case at all. I keep noticing things, remembering things, HEARING things that remind me of her. If I do it, then I'm sure my Dad is also. We seem to have cornered the local ma

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Emotions, thoughts and angry feelings

Sunday will be the 2 week anniversary of my Mom's death. To say that's it's been difficult... well, that would be an understatement. Add on top of it I'm beginning to understand what my Mom told me years ago. My Dad is a selfish asshole. In the two weeks since Mom died, not ONCE has he asked how I'm doing or how I'm coping with things. Not once has he offered me a hug. Not once has he said a simple "Thank you". I've taken care of the arrangements that were necessary for the funeral, I ma

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom Update

I just wanted to thank everyone for their positive thoughts, well wishes and prayers. My Mother passed away this afternoon at 3:45.

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom Update

We were just informed today by Hospice that my Mom has 3 days to 1 week to live. Please keep my family in your prayers. Thank you and May your God or Goddess Bless you

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

It isn't good news...

Well... according to Dad's urologist, there's a 95% chance it's cancer. Exploring options and, as I type this waiting on a call-back from Hospice to see if they have someone that can be here while I go to the hospital with Dad when he has a renal scan on Wednesday. The doc told dad they would probably have to remove the kidney (pending the results of the renal scan) as soon as possible. There's isn't anyplace locally that can do it laproscopically, so it's major surgery. Dad could go out

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Something to chuckle about....

Ok... well.... Thanks to the room monitor (like a baby monitor...) I just over heard a comment/question from my Mom to my Dad....   "Did Jimmy rob a bank?"   ROFL   Ahhh... out of the mouth of those with Alzheimer's....

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

The suspense will finally be over....

Well, the suspense will finally be over this afternoon. Dad will get the results of the CAT Scan (with dye) on his right kidney from his urologist at 3:00. We'll finally have an idea as to what the "mass" is and will be able to plan our next course of action. To say he's "flipping out" would be an understatement. I've tried to tell him that there's no need to worry until we know for sure exactly what it is, but he certainly won't listen to what I have to say. Since everything that's happene

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

I'm back... but the news isn't the greatest...

Greetings everyone.... I know it's been a while and for that I apologize. So much has happened since my last entry. I think the following will explain...   Mom has been in and out of the hospital several times (7 total). When she came home this time, she came home with HospiceCare. Basically, that translates to the doctors believe she only has about 6 months to live. We've been battling congestive heart failure, two heart attacks, alzheimer's, her red blood cell count dropping (and t

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom Update

Kitty asked a question about what my Mom is currently able to do for herself. Honestly, very little. She is able to walk with a walker for short distances, longer distances on hardwood, or tile flooring. Mom and Dad DON'T have hardwood or tile though. VERY plush and VERY thick carpet. So it's slow going. She is feeding herself, can assist bathing herself, and stuff like that. She has a hard time getting up and out of bed, or up from a chair. She's gaining more strength daily, but it will

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Home! (Again!) LOL

Yup, Mom came home today. I had to run down to my old place to pick some stuff up so I thought I'd post a quick update. Mom came home today at around 11:00AM Eastern. It's been a long day!   She's having some pain in her right lower chest area. Turns out she either has a touch of pleurasy or pneumonia (again). We're treating for pneumonia. Had to run to the drug store/pharmacist and pick up some new prescriptions for her earlier today. $500!!!! And that wasn't even ALL of the RX's sh

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update - Woohoo!

Sorry for the lack of updates. I've been on- and off-line, popping in, but not posting an update. It's been a while!   Life is HECTIC to say the least, but all in all, that's a good thing as Martha would say. Mom is still in the Rehab Facility, but is doing really, really well. My time has become more limited since she's doing so good.   Let's see...hmmm.... She's WALKING! Yup, you read correctly. MINIMAL ASSIST EVEN! For those of you unfamiliar with the "terms of the trade" so to

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update-Dad too...

I'm sitting here, writing this blog entry, while contemplating the course of my life on the next months, and possibly years. Yup, VERY tough decisions have to be made in the next 24-36 hours. There's a meeting tomorrow with the Social Worker, Charge Nurse, & Physical Therapist, about how we want to continue my Mom's care. There were two options presented to my father and I. 1) Take Mom home with 24X7 care; or 2) admit Mom to another Rehabilitation facility so that she can continue her t

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom/Dad Update

Ok... well, it's been an intersting week so far. Dad was discharged yesterday. In addition to his "normal" meds (including lexapro 20 mg 1xday), they've added ativan (.5 mg every 6 hours prn) and remeron (1/2 of a 15 mg tab in the evening). The ativan is a "nerve pill" and the remeron is another anti-depressant. It was NOT a heart attack for dear ole' Dad. Stress stress stress. So I guess in "old school" terms, a nervous breakdown. Dad was supposed to start out-patient group therapy this

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update--Dad too now... :(

Well, my life just keeps getting more interesting! The past 3 days have been, to use a cliche, a living hell. I've watched my Dad deteriorate to the point that I believe he's now suffered a nervous breakdown. Friday was the ultimate cry for help from my Dad. We were standing in the kitchen AFTER visiting my Mom at the hospital. I was clipping cupons and we were chatting, of course about Mom, the bills, and the fact that Medicare IS going to pay, and so will their AARP coverage.... Don't kn

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update

<BIG SIGH!> I took a "break" on Sunday and didn't go to the hospital on Sunday. I spoke my Dad on Sunday evening and told him not to come in until late on Monday. He actually took my advice and didn't come in until almost 2:00PM... more on that later though. Gave me time to have a nice little chat with my Mom. It was difficult to do, but I pretty much laid it all out on the line. I even told her she was being a selfish brat at one point.   I started the conversation by telling

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update

Well, according to my father, the proverbial axe is about to fall. A "Family Meeting" has been scheduled by the head of the Skilled Nursing Facility for Tuesday. My Dad is frightened that they will just discharge Mom without any rehabilitation. Quite simply, neither he nor I could handle Mom at home if she was not helping us, help her. She's only about 120 pounds, and quite honestly, I could lift her easily. But does Mom or Dad either one want me showering with and bathing Mom? Nope. Don'

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update-In Skilled Nursing Facility

Yup, they've moved my mom to a skilled nursing facility now for physical/occupational therapy. Now I'm facing a "different" kind of delima and I really don't have a clue what to do. The situation honestly PISSES ME OFF!!!   No, it has nothing to do with the staff, or even the facility, it's all wonderful. It's my MOM!! She's playing my Dad like a violin, period. And get this, he's letting her! I just spoke with Mom's nurse, a wonderful young lady named "Leslie" (no, not her real name!

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update

Today was another milestone! I know it's kinda gross, but Mom had a "good" bowel movement this evening... I mean it was a healthy.... anyway... There were previous bm's, just not as "large" as the one this evening.   Our only concerns now are her hemoglobin counts being so low & where the hell is the blood going!?!?!? There are currently concerns about upper gastro/intestinal bleeding. There is "digested" blood in her stool making it dark and coppery smelling. I'm not a doctor, bu

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update

Woohoo!! Everyday just keeps getting better! If this keeps up, maybe we'll be home by New Years Eve! Well, I'm hoping anyway!   Mom's appetite has improved, she is actually eating a bit more with each meal. She ruined her dinner though by drinking an entire strawberry milkshake just prior. But she still ate more than half of her dinner! And she ate ALL of her lunch.   Her niece is spending the nite with her, giving me the entire nite off. I'm sooo glad she did that. I'm about t

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update

While I was trying to sleep this afternoon, they removed my Mom's chest tube! Woohoo!! Next step is for me to sit on her chest and force feed her! If that's what it takes to get her to eat, that's what I'm gonna do! Aparently though she is eating better, and that's a good thing. Took her brekkie again this morning (don't think I mentioned that in my earlier post) and it upset her tummy. So, no more sausage gravy and bisquit from her favorite restaurant for a while. 'Nuf said about that.

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update

This is getting to be a roller coaster ride.... (*sigh*).   Mom is now out of CCU (Cardiac Care Unit-like ICU but for heart patients) as of yesterday morning. I've been spending the night and I think I've had about 8 hours total of sleep in the past 4 days. She's having some anxiety about staying there alone in the hospital. So I've been staying, not in the room with her, but in the waiting room. Those couches and the floor are NOT comfortable, in addition I need a CPAP to be able to sleep

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Correction to previous post--its CCU

*SIGH* Drama Drama Drama   Ok, well, there is a bright spot to my Mom's being moved to CCU out of her regular room. Her "roommate" was beligerant, hateful, really, probably suffering from either dementia or alzheimer's. Mom could NOT get any rest. She slept like a baby last nite in CCU, of course I was there the entire time holding her hand. I'm plum tuckered out now myself. Time to clean up my place, feed the animals, feed myself, shower, then I'm going up to my parents house and cle

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Here we go again! Mom's in ICU

Just received a call from my Dad, and I'm in the middle of a final exam for one of my classes. They just moved Mom back into ICU. Infection in her blood... again. Don't know what I'm going to do now. Have to finish this final and see if I can reschedule the next one. Just wanted to update real quick. Oh, my bio-grandmother is in the hospital right down the hall from my adoptive mother.... it's a family reunion at the hospital and it SUCKS!

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update

Really quick, before I take my care to the garage to get it worked on... (yeah, it sucks!) but I couldn't get it to start this morning unless I gave it a jump. Alternator seems to be working fine. It was just replaced a year ago, but the battery seems to be 2 or 3 years old. It's probably the battery according to my uncle. We'll see. Just what I need, another added expense!   They may have figured out the "why" of my mom's being weak, but not the "what"'s causing it..... Blood tests cam

WVSailor

WVSailor

 

Mom's Condition Update

In the famed words of the late Mr. Rogers, "It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood..."   They started the necessary procedures to remove the chest tube today! First of many steps started at least. I'm not real famiiar with the procedure, but they injected some type of "talc" (I don't know if it was mixed with something, but it didn't look like a "powder" in the syringe) into my Mom's chest tube. After that we had to roll her on her side(s) for 15 minutes at a time. Was really interst

WVSailor

WVSailor

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