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asamvav111's Rainbow Couch

A blog by asamvav111 in Member

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About this blog

The Couch refers to the psychoanalysts classic appliance which claims minds daily . But, put a Rainbow over it, it becomes a colourful kaleidoscope of imaginative thoughtforms.So, the blog is what I think of the world and what the world thinks of me.

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Désespéré et terrifié

It is often very difficult to put into words what you feel. I am better at this with poetry. But, simple hard truths are never really my style. I like them the way I like hungry lions, caged and at a distance, preferably with a loaded gun in my hand. Yet, sometimes it becomes emphatic to tell the truth. And then it becomes hard. For years I have worn many masks; Masks of happiness, of humour, of grandiosity, of known lies and unknown truths. But, beneath all that garbage, lies a scared boy a

March 12, 2013

4

Mon Cher - Salutation De La Bien-Aimée

Forever will be our destination. I will wait for you, On the other side of the river Of memories, of life and yet not of regrets. I will remember our time together As the golden springs long past; A silence that became music which turned still once more, A passionate embrace frozen in time. Then, we will meet again on the other side of the river, And we will resume our dance once more, now and forever. ©asamvav111

March 8, 2013

2

Rangrez

Oh dyer of mine, Dear Dyer of mine, Please reveal your secrets divine, What concoction have you created dear, Of your colors and godforsaken water! My heart’s all blue in love so profound, My cloak’s soaked in saffron unbound… How am I to complain of my tale? I like a stubborn asked you to color my veil, Oh! Your colors penetrated my fabric, insane, Deep within my heart ‘n soul everything’s dyed of your stain, Color my heart away, Oh this feelin’… Dyer, Are you

December 1, 2013

2

It Is Necessary To See Death

It is necessary to see death. It is necessary to see death, stark naked, lurid and wild, Death as it pisses in the dark alleyways drunk and ecstatic on the jumps of drugs that are hard to name and harder to pronounce, it is still necessary to see death face to face. In a breach of society sanctioned lucidity hardwired in our brain, It is still very necessary to see death, To see the violent vandalism of civilization, Of ashes and nuclear death of atoms and atom bombs, Billions of flashligh

September 2, 2013

2

Love in terms of songs

So this particular blog post is peculiar in a way, because here I am going to share something I am passionate about... actually not one but two things... Music & Poetry. Bollywood industry of the yesteryears has produced some of the most talented musicians - Singers, lyricists, composers and even directors who have indeed put those musical gems into an appropriate wrapper of cinema and actors who emoted the languish and the laughter, bringing life to the lyrics. Bollywood is wellknown to giv

March 20, 2013

1

After You Left

(This is dedicated to Carl) Your face is fading from my memory Your form Dispersing In the cold winter night In the condensations on the grass that look like teardrops And my vision is blurred Fin ©asamvav111

December 16, 2013

2

Festivals and Cold

This is my first blog entry here in GA, and I must tell you I am a lousy bloger. I have started three blogs in my online life and abandoned all three after a while because of lack things to post. Then, why am I doing this now? Do I have more things happening to me now? Well... for starters, I am indeed going through a period of change, no not Sex change, but a change regarding my career, my life, my surroundings and what not. More over, I have matured over the years to be able to find few stuff

October 16, 2012

5

Good Night, My Sweet

He sleeps beneath the blossoming bows of jasmine in this breezy summer night. The call of the flowers fills the hearts of lonely travelers afar. Flowing from vale to vale, its fragrance beckon to the weary legs, Like the sirens who had once enticed the returning Greeks. And as they arrive what do they behold! A solitary bed, Nestled under the Jasmine and Elder grooves, Requiem for a love long lost. Angels sigh in the wind As sweet petals descend upon the grave of my beloved. The silver

February 17, 2013

1

The Vigil

I have waited many nights like this Through the dissident thunders and winds running wild Through raindrops trickling from the broken windows I have waited in my vigilant silence So dark your visage yet tranquil as smoggy mornings I have spent many nights trying to discern their silhouette Against the many shades of grey my vision had painted In the bleak canvas of nature’s blasphemous hawking I fear her call, the insistent solicitation of a harlot Aware of nature’s charm in begu

November 29, 2013

4

Two Poems

Becoming Poets You and I, we have a strong bond Like brothers, like lovers; We disgust the world with our vain perversions, our inane attachment with the word and the seas of heresy part at our command revealing the shells of untruths hiding beneath the silt of social justice. Ecstasy beyond judgement is what we share in the binding fallacy of corporeal pain battling to win over the spirit. Our ascension begins at the alter of ego. Broken down

March 22, 2017

2

Sorry for our misdemeanor

I feel weird about writing this post. And embarrassed as hell. I don't know how many of you have faced this in real life. So, it is quite a sensitive issue as well. A couple of nights before, I enjoyed this wonderful open air concert put together by the British Council and Bengal Foundation in a joint venture. It was a folk music fest, where musicians from both Bangladesh and UK performed traditional folk numbers from each their respective cultures. It was an exciting and sonorous jam up sessio

January 17, 2013

3

In Response To

This post is in response to Yettieone's beautiful blog 'Proudly Standing Strong'. So, if you have not read that yet you better come back later. Yettie is a wonderful blogger; His words well-chosen and to the point, and his content heartwarming. It is not the first time I have been so moved by his words, and hopefully will not be the last either. His latest post is about people, who has touched his mind and rendered it gold. He is talking about people who are not related by blood, but has rem

November 2, 2012

4

Adoration By Tears

So long it has been since I have touched those soft lashes of delicate yield So long it has been since I kissed those smooth curves of apple So long it has been since I glorified those abyss of passion, dark and deep So long it has been since I adorned your transcendent frame, your mask of deceit ©asamvav111

August 8, 2013

2

No-Where To Run

Tears trickle down those rosy cheeks As I watch by the cold weather outside And the cold feelings of the old heart I betrayed Watching me becoming a prisoner of my own love I cast my net slowly waiting in silence With haunting patience for the catch I await your return. ©asamvav111 An old creation, 2005.

December 8, 2012

4

Predestination

Predestination Staring at the blue sky To the distant pasts that glittered in the stars Unseen, unfound, hidden beneath the fluffy clouds Lying on the concrete Hard truths and harder are the choices that exhumed The sins of the father reflected on the Lamb of God Floating skyscrapers Diminishing breaths that’s building upon the layers of Foggy winter morning’s urban bustling rabble 14/10/2016 ©asamvav111

October 14, 2016

6

Dirges And Obituary

Dirges and Obituary You said I wouldn’t like your playlist But, my dear, I love your songs How could I not Our choices are so similar But every word, every tune, is like they are wrought in my tears, my heart's blood How songs disappear How tears end all wars Troubles in the garden and the roses bleed love Here lies my heart all bruised and dark Here lies my heart all silent in prayer Now & forever yours ©asamvav111

January 12, 2014

1

Criminalization of Homosexuality in India: All that is black is not coal!

Ok, I have stayed silent for long... for too long it seems. There has been a good number of blog posts in GA and thankfully all of them are in favour of the LGBT community of India. This was expected. GA is a safe space and a close community of great solidarity. In today's hateful cyberspace, this is a truly unique oasis of love. I am really thankful for GA. But, regarding this matter, there has been some amount of confusion and misinformation as well. I want to target those and clear the air a

December 22, 2013

5

Creation Myth

(For a certain someone) Who created you Whether by touch or a gentle smile Like snow flakes drifting in the wind Melting with the smallest touch of a Warm hand Who created you Whether by plan or perchance A divine intervention that shined the Light in the darkness of the void adorning The unseen universe Who created you Whether in dream or reality find Flawed images of perfection assuming The ultimate victory of love over Experience lost to the mind Who created you Who created yo

March 13, 2017

6

Friendship

Begin by music what lyrics had shunned, Evanescent feelings that shan't be returned, Forever is a long time if you are not a friend, Every limit mortal as time's sickle bend. Yet I bequeath my heart and desire, To you and your lot I cast in my fire, A flame everlasting shall flourish in me, Like a flower that blooms only for the bee. 31/12/16 ©asamvav111 Wishing everyone of my friends, near & dear ones, far & farces, enemies & rivals A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR.

December 31, 2016

7

Fatal Festivity

My last post here said how happy I am to go home. Ironically, last night I recieved a call from my mom telling me, my childhood best friends dad has died. He was suffering from Parkinsonism for a long time, had a mass compressing his spinal cord, which was found to be thankfully benign and he was bed-ridden since early last year. But, he was recovering well. The physiotherapy was paying and the last when I saw him about six months ago, he was able to walk on a surface but couldn't take stairs ye

October 17, 2012

1

Untitled

Writing about love is like writing about pain; When did it start, how did it progress, did it affect your day to day activities, How did you cope with it, pills, meditation, diet… so on and so forth? Yes, Love has indeed brought a lot of heartache. But, is that all it had to offer? What about the nicer times, the times when we flowed like music, an eternity in peace. That time when in the dead of the night, you came by just to say, “I love you”. The times that we shared in the whirlwind of r

December 7, 2012

3

The Communion

There are many stages of making love First there is the Look A Look, that which can melt the stars and feed a million souls Then the Unveiling Like that of the most precious of the presents A slow sensuous unwrap The Indulgence is next Deliberate movements across the landscape Appraising the scenery of touch Then comes the Immaculate kiss A divine surrender of a watchful heart And the rest is a blur of motions of negative spaces Until finally past the soaring heights of the steep

April 4, 2014

0

Colours Of Love

Colours of Love Paint the whole city blue and red, In Colours they come and in Colours they fade. My Colourman comes in a haunting snow, Pristine white when everything glow. He comes silently by my broken window, Softly sauntering like a sad old shadow. Glimpses by my broken window pane And lo what he sees, the old me again. Stuck in my bed in perpetual illness, Waiting in line for my turn with patience, Bereft of all but skin and bones, Sadist as always I am a sight to behold. Yet unlike mo

January 18, 2013

0

Returning Sunshine

You kept telling me how I took up all the space in our relationship. How you needed to get away To get a way around the things in your head... Blasphemy. I believe I was still in your head. And stuck in the chambers of your heart, Your entrails shackling me to the walls of inferiority. Understanding your grudging affection Took up most of my daylight, yet you kept Asking for more... more space in your head. More air to breath, you sought out the nearest Island of wasted youth. More experienc

August 11, 2016

3

Renunciation

My beloved didn’t answer my prayer I tried all my usual tricks I dried my tears at his feet I covered my head in my shame and walked away Finally understood what it is to lose, to a pretty face An uncaring smile and those ravishing eyes Snuffed out my soft ambers’ austere plea My beloved didn’t look back ©asamvav111

November 24, 2013

2

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