So.... its been over a week (almost 2) since I've last heard from a really good friend. It's kind of put me in a funk. Last time this happened with someone else I never heard from the person again and this person was there to help me through it and now.... gosh its a real pain in the ass. I just wish I knew if he was still sick, out partying for his birthday with his boyfriend (I know they were having a party), did he just decide to give up on me all together or did his pyshco ex-boyfriend do something.

I guess I just don't take rejection to well... case in point.

I had come out to my mother a few month's ago and she said she really didn't mind. I should have known better and read between the lines because now all we do is argue about my life and my choice. It first started when I had met someone online and we were going to meet in a public place for dinner. She did not want me to go all she could keep saying is I was meeting the person for sex. I told her that's not going to happen especially since I don't think the people at Red Robin would be too happy. Well that guy bailed on me after meeting and I learned a lot about him after the fact and how much of a liar he was. I am glad that things stopped because I probably wouldn't have found out about his lies for a while.

I then made a new friend and of course my mom didn't like it. He is older than me and lives several thousand miles away. I have been talking to him until he decided to up and disappear too. My mom didn't like the fact that he was older, she thought he was some sort of predator, even though he is the same age as my aunt and my cousin. He is also old enough to be my dad but he would have had to gotten started really early and been into women for that to happen. So he is the person I mention at the beginning that I haven't heard from. This unfortunately has made my mom happy since I am not constantly texting or online all the time anymore. I don't know why she cares about my texting habits since I pay my own bill since I get my phone through Verizon.

Things over the last several weeks have escalated between us which is sad since we were close. I was telling her about how my friend George went to DC pride at the begging of June and had asked me to go but do to an obligation I already had made I could not go with him.I told him I would go next year for sure. My friend Jason told me that He, his boyfriend George, my friend George and I should hit DC and Baltimore pride,. My mom just about him the rood when she found out that I told George I would go with him next year. Neither of them know about Jason's offer. She started going on and on about how I would go to hell and that the government would use secretly taken pictures from the event to round up people and do away with them. What really hurt out of the argument was when she said being gay was a choice. I told her it was not a choice and we argued some more about it. I told her if it was a choice maybe she should go out and date a lesbian, which she didn't take so well. That night I stopped the argument by walking away and staying away from her for the rest of the night.

Now my sexuality seems to come up a lot and has been the butt (no pun intended) of several jokes. Everything seems to be crashing down and I don't know what I am going to do. I had my aunt grilling my sister over my friend George since he was with me when I dropped my niece off to her and my aunt was visiting. I know my aunt better than my sister and I am glad my sister chose to ignore my aunt's Inquisition despite her trying to get information.

Besides my family issues.... there was a point where I thought I was going to be fired from Verizon. I have exhausted my FMLA and had used more than allowed and was unaware of this until well over the limit. I was sick for a long while and it turned out to be a combination of things. One was a medicine I was one, second was finding out that I can not tolerate fructose or lactose (which includes high fructose corn syrup) and lastly gluten. While all my celiac test were negative I still can't tolerate more than a small amount. So I was on edge about my job which made things even more stress full. I did have an interview with another company and I am still waiting to hear back since it was right before the holiday and he needed to interview some more people. Verizon excused the days that I went over through and internal program but they were reluctant to do it. So the job is safe for now but I am continuing to look for something I really want to do.

End Rant.