Hmm...yesterday night I attended a prom. The prom was for my old school that I had attended a couple of years ago, and 8 people told me to come as their date... I was very flattered, but I refused. Until one of my best friends (a guy) asked me to go as a "guest" of his and that's when I agreed.
The prom started with a very CRAPPY dinner. Plastic chicken, carpet fish, and stone steak. (the prom cost $40 to attend mind you)...then the dinner was followed by the prom court as well as awards and games...
THen the real fun started. THe lights dimmed and the DJ started the party/dance session with Chris Brown's "Run It" which is definetely one of my favorite clubbing songs. TO my dismay, most of the girls that I wanted to dance with, were in need of taking pictures of themselves...(god I don't get why girls do that)...so I ended up walking up to the dance floor, ALONE, and joining the 15 people that started dancing. As I started to dance, I looked around the ballroom, locking eyes with my first true "love." I think it was love...anyway, when we locked eyes, he stared for a bit, but turned away, but for that split second of eye contant, I felt that connection I had discovered long ago...
A LITTLE HISTORY!
THis friend was a teammate of mines in intermediate basketball and volleyball (before I switched schools). He was a jock, with a jock-build (but more skinny than muscular) and had the most beautiful face I could ever imagine. THe weird thing was, he hung out with the "popular" jocks of the school, who were all asswipes and well Assfaces (like Jame in Dom's WT). They were disgustingly snobby and cruel to those below them in the social status pyramid (luckily I was an "in-crowd" ), but HE, let's call him Joe, WASN'T. He wasn't anything like them. He was actually very soft-spoken (but had a such a soothing voice), he was very shy in his body-language. He was considerate of others (and back in Intermediate, i had a lot of baby-fat on me...but he was the only one who did not make jokes about it).
So anyway, fastforward to 8th grade where Joe's younger brother gets accepted into our school. We become friends quick, and we both go partying together a lot. THen when i switched schools in 9th grade, I started to work out my body and lost all my fat and gained lots of muscle. At the same time, Joe's brother did this as well. So we became two "hot" guys who always hung out together. Although I hung out with Joe's brother 24/7, I never saw Joe. WHich irritated me...but I figured it was good. I had gotten over my "love-sick" spell and didn't want to go back into my old habbits.
No I was there grooving on the dance floor, staring him straight in the eyes. He turned away, but kept on staring back at me. Those feelings I can't really describe, maybe like when your stomach feels like it's upside down, came back. I would call these feelings butterflies.
ANYWAY, the girls came back from taking pictures and started to dance around me. (Yes, it is kind of gross, but we started freaking like animals...thank god I'm...gay...because I would've had a huge hard-on). He started staring at me, but quickly turned away once he saw me dancing.
He actually walked towards the exit of the ballroom at a brisk pace...and I didn't notice until the outside lights hit me, that I had matched his walk, pace for pace. I quickly caught up to him in the bathroom where he was cooling himself with some water.
He looked up at me and nodded. (those type of "macho-i'm-a-straight-guy nods") and I nodded back. He then said to me, "You look good."
He actually said this to me...and well I was so flustered I said, "you are,"....lmfao....I then corrected myself and said, "you too." and it was then, RIGHT THERE, that I thought I would be receiving my first kiss...I just could feel it...his face was 3 feet away from mines and I could just some sort of spark between us...but that's when he said, "well...I'm going to go back now,"....and walked out of the bathroom. I almost cried!
After this incident, I was hurt/angry, so I did what most teenagers would do...try to make him jealous...
Joe was dancing with his group of friends (well...he was just swaying...like I said, he's kind of reserved...not reserved...but calm) and so I asked this senior to dance with me, and so I pulled her arm towards where Joe was dancing and started to freak her. He immediately saw me (as did the 30 people surround me) and I saw him leave the dance floor...I felt horrible after I had accomplished my goal...but when he came back with one of my closests friends and started freaking her, I told myself it was on.
It was stupid...yes I know...but I acted like what I was: an impulsive, hormone-raging teenager.
So I wasted the stupid dance just trying to top his freaks with mine (everyone was surprised that JOe was freaking...because he was so...it didn't fit him) and when it came to the second-to-the-last song, I stopped, because I couldn't do it anymore. Then I walked over to Joe and pulled him out of his freak and asked him, "Hey, do you want to hang out later?" He was surprised and started studdering all over the place..it was so cute. THen he said he had plans with his friends and reminded me I also had plans with HIS brother that night... SO he left me with those words and walked up to his date, dancing the "last-dance" with her.
I sat down, and well...felt like shit. This was my one chance to really show the only guy I had ever truly loved (not lusted) in my life, that I had these feelings...but I couldn't.
I need help figuring out if he's gay or into me...Could you guys help me?
Here are the "hints" that I have accumalated over the past years (YES, I WAS OBSESSED WITH HIM!)
1) in basketball during our defensive drills, he would always ask to be my partner and when he defended, he grinded his but up against my...frontal...area...with lots of force. LIKE GRINDING IT HARD...(making me hard as well).
2) Whenever I see him (although it is rare) he always compliments me. "Nice job patrick. You play the violin really beautifully" or "Patrick, great D" followed with a butt-slap.
3) Whenever I hung out with his brother, he would stay distant...almost like a jealous distant...
4) He was always SUPER shy around me, and really studdered or mixed up words when talking to me (like he was nervous)
5) When I went to this prom, he hadn't seen me for over 2 years (while I secretly watched him while I would pick up friends from my old school) and he kept on staring at me...obviously because I wasn't fat anymore and I actually looked muscular.
6) THE FREAK THING! He started freaking when I started freaking...almost trying to out-play me.
7) whenever I shook his hand, it would get really sweaty..lol
8) whenever i hugged him, he would kind of tense up, but then ease into the hug.
9) Whenever I hung out with his brother, he would always ask his brother about me...
10) He doesn't have a myspace, so he would leave comments using his brother's myspace on mine...
Those are the hints...the last one is kind of iffy, but I wanted to make 10..
If you guys could help me figure out if I should come out to him or not...it would be great.
oOo! Another hint: He's very metrosexual. With his hair gelled EVERDAY, and with a clean-cut image...wearing quiksilver shirts that accenuate his body...
P.S. if i do come out, I want to know if you guys think he is gay, because then he would be the first person that I come out to...and if I had to deal with coming out to my family/friends, I would actually have someone there by my side...like Owen and Aiden in DOm's TLW....