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Frost Bite ~ Day 1



So i went through with the cold shoulder thing today... but i just read the comments telling me not to do it. Well i am glad you all gave me some advise... but i feel that i have to give trav the freeze out a for a couple more days. I know you all said that friends you have done that way is not close to you anymore (AFriendlyFace :worship: ) But i really have to do this for my piece of mind... i'm hurt and i am couping with it the best way i know how... well not really... but at least how i want to. And if i end up losing his friendship... and i hate to say this... but it may actually be for the best. Because if i know if haven't got a chance of at least being his friend i WILL get over him. So either way this goes... it will be the same.


Anyway... so tonight at youth group... we were talking about renting movies at our local video store... most people won't rent from the guy because... well you guessed it... he's gay... and his boyfriend works with him. He also sells weed out of the back... thats another reason as well. But my youth group leader still rents from him and she is like... i can't help but to like his boyfriend... he is so sweet. And so she still rents movies from there. She also said that just because they are gay doesn't make them a bad person. And in my mind i went "SCORE!"


So any way back to the trav's case of frost bite... i only have one class with him... english... and our teacher is really young... it's her first year teaching... and her and the other young teachers down on the wing have lunch together everyday so they are always late seeing how i have that class right after second lunch break. anyway we all stand out side of the door and just shoot the breeze talk and laugh. Well me and brittany and a few more friends we standing there waiting for our teacher and trav comes up and says "hey Nick, hey brittany." and slaps brittany a five and i just turn to talk to bree who is also standing with us. and i just ignore him. So our teacher comes and she lets us in and we set down at our single seater desks. I set behind trav and he always stays turned around... brittany, brandi and our other friend ashley sets in the row beside of us... and so i turn to talk to them instead of having my usual banter with him. He asks me a question... first time i ignore it... second time he asks it... i shoot him a a dirty look and answer him in a very stern voice... luckly at this time our teacher assigns us a story to read out of our book and so we read it aloud in what is called popcorn reading style. This story is so effing long... and anyway everyone has read except for trav and he had fallen asleep. So the last person to read (another one of my friends Ladeatra (pronounced La-Dea-Tra) and so she calls on trav... He sets up and turns around and asks me where we are at in the story... i grouchily tell him and he still can't find it... and so i say really loud so everyone can here "I'll just read, asshole." the teacher doesn't have problem with those words so i didb'r get in trouble and i started to read. So we finished the story, he turned to say something to me and the bell wrang and i just got up and left... i havn't seen or heard from him since.


Ok... this is how slow cingular is about voice mails... i just got one from trav that he left me on thurday... he said i am here at dairy queen and i am bored so i figured i would give you a call... and i just deleted the message... i mean it is almost a week old :devil: ... so yeah...


I was in a really chipper and good mood with the rest of the crew and i made sure to flaunt it infront of his face. So yeah... i feel pretty good right now :king: speaking of pretty... i started the sequel to the book i read this weekend... uglies, and get this the sequel is called pretties... lol... it is good so far i am on page 110... lol... so yeah




later ~ nick :read:

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I'll give you the same advice that I've given to shy_kurt and every other gay boy who has a crush on a str8 boy ... MOVE ON! IT IS NOT HEALTHY! You will only end up getting hurt in the end, there are just no if's, and's or but's about it ... it may sound harsh, but it's reality. There are so many ways to meet other gay guys your age in your area that I didn't have just 10 or so years ago when I was in high school. Don't waste your precious life fawning over something you can't have.


But ... don't be too harsh on Trav. Be his friend, but just his friend. It sounds like his GF is a class-A b*tch. You might want to just really lay it on the line for him, yet at the same time, be sure first that your perception of her and her behavior isn't clouded by the fact that you're also in love (or whatever) with him ... try to step back and look at the situation from a more objective position.


Now for some happy news ... check my web site on Tuesday evening and there might be a treat there for you! :P

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