I finally broke down and decided that if I was going to spend so much time here anyway, I might as well establish myself and maybe make some friends. I feel slightly bad about the timing since I know GA has taken a couple hits lately. I never had a chance to talk with those members who are having issues in their real lives, but hopefully everything will work out for them.
As for my life, I've decided I need to make more connections with people in any way I can. You know those moments when you meet someone in passing and you maybe exchange two words, but you just seem to click? Almost as if you can see for just a moment what it might be like if you had more time than just that minute to say something or that somehow you were meant to share that moment with that person. I'm not on crack I swear. Real or imagined, I want more of those moments.
Where did this come from? Its all because of this guy I've worked with on and off for almost two years. We've never had much chance to really talk but everytime we do, its like something clicks and we can both feel the words between us, but don't know how to voice them. Both of us have had opportunities out-of-state and I can remember this one time on his last day before he went to Florida I wished him luck and we both stood there and just looked at each other. It was this supercharged moment and not at all sexual (yeah I know what you're thinking ). Well, he's been back from Florida since the summer and we've been dancing around each other ever since...well, until wednesday.
It was a rare occasion where we worked together and he asked me to get coffee after work. So, I went out for coffee with this guy who I had exchanged a couple handfuls of conversation with over nearly two years and what do we do? We talk until the coffee shop closes. Nearly two hours of totally unrestrained conversation about...I can't even explain it. We didn't talk about stuff. Not much about music or movies or gossip. We shared a few past experiences but most of it was just ideas. Thats the best way I have to explain it. For two hours one or the other of us would go on for minutes at a time about our ideas, our goals, our spirituality (not religion, spirituality).
I got home and he was online and he told me he had to pull over on the way home to write stuff down. I stayed up until 3am because I was too wired to do my economics homework and go to bed. I know the entire thing sounds rather...crazy? abstract? stupid even? I promise I'm not a loon and that I can have a normal conversation. You'll soon find out that I was the inventor of the rant and can be a total bitch. But all I can think of is that with moments like this, who needs drugs?