[Jack Scribe] DESERT FANTASIES

[wildone]

Great Chapter Jack

 

I won't say too much right now, as you just released the chapter. Hopefully nobody reads this before reading, but I was glad to see blackmail was involved.

 

Nice to see Cray's family is continuing to grow in some aspects and decrease in others.

 

Steve

[old bob]

Great Chapter Jack

What I particularly like in your stories :

-They are a lot of good guys in it,

-You are very well documented about the places and the people you describe. Its "real life".

- Its very easy to identify oneself with your main hero.

- Your style is nice to follow, especially for me with French as my mother tongue.

- You seems to know "very well" what you are talking about

- There are less cliffhangers in your stories than others I know (too much is too much ).

 

Thanks to be such a mature and wise author, and long life to Cray .

Edited October 4, 2007 by old bob

[Jack Scribe]

What I particularly like:

- They are a lot of good guys in it,

- You are very well documented about the places and the people you describe. Its "real life".

- Its very easy to identify oneself with your main hero.

- Your style is nice to follow, especially for me with French as my mother tongue.

- You seems to know "very well" what you are talking about

...and long life to Cray.

I'm basically a hopeless romantic and the story(ies) reflect that. Populating the story with good guys and knowing the characters (warts and all) are part of my process to paint a picture. Cray is pretty mature for a guy his age. I took the posture that his real dad was a very strong influence in parenting during the first eight years of Cray's life. This gave our hero the "stuff" to withstand issues he faced up until when he left home.

 

Being in the hotel/restaurant business for a long time gave me the opportunity to observe hundreds of people - all sizes, shapes, personalities, intelligence - on a daily basis. However, there are a few aspects (re., Mario and his business) that is pure imagination. And a few bad guys, like the parents, will pop up from time to time.

 

Cray's a nice guy who deserves a better life. As Steve points out, "Cray's family is continuing to grow in some aspects and decrease in others."

 

Jack

[old bob]

Being in the hotel/restaurant business for a long time gave me the opportunity to observe hundreds of people - all sizes, shapes, personalities, intelligence - on a daily basis.

Well you are a very good observer ! Refering to my own experience, you should add "morality" to your list. Especially in catering and restaurant business,you meet a lot of people, clean or unclean ! I could tell you a lot of "life" stories I had to live myself

However, there are a few aspects (re., Mario and his business) that is pure imagination.

really ? your imagination is very "blooming"

BTW, I red on your site that you are a wine-specialist and you traveled in France and Italy to collect the best ones. Myself, I never despise a good bottle. Any idea about swiss wines ?

[Conner]

Great chapter, Jack!

 

I especially enjoyed the conversation between Spike and Cray early in the chapter. Their banter was honest, sincere and playful all at the same time.

 

What can I say about Mario! He's just incredible. He certainly knows how do get things done. I'm sure he would have enjoyed taking Gene apart piece by piece. I liked the way you had Mario wipe his feet before leaving the mother's house. That was satisfying.

 

Conner

[TalonRider]

Cray's a nice guy who deserves a better life. As Steve points out, "Cray's family is continuing to grow in some aspects and decrease in others."

 

It does look like things are working out for Cray. So far, we know he's lost one dad and is now losing a step-dad, and his mom. And, he's gaining two new dad's and two older brothers. You might even throw in an uncle, considering what Ed has done.

 

I'm sure it was difficult for Mario to not tear Gene's head off. But at least, he let Gene know that he knew what he had done.

 

I just hope your not setting us for something bad to happen in the future. Things are going along smoothly and the story title is Desert Fantasies.

 

Good Chapter Jack

[C James]

I very much liked the "visit". While at first I was grating that they didn't just bury the scum, I have to admit that paying them is probably in Cray's best interests.

[Jack Scribe]

BTW, I red on your site that you are a wine-specialist and you traveled in France and Italy to collect the best ones. Myself, I never despise a good bottle. Any idea about swiss wines ?

 

One of my most cherished memories - 25 years ago - was a driving trip from the Mosel/Rhine wine regions of Germany to Lake Como (BC - before Clooney). I stopped in Lausanne and asked the hotel concierge to book a luncheon table for one at Freddy Giraret's restaurant in Crissier...a village outside Lausanne. There was one open table - reservations were usually made months in advance. This was in 1982 and Freddy Giraret was considered to be the best chef IN THE WORLD.

 

The experience was superb. The service staff treated me - a young American nobody - as if I were royalty. I do remember an exceptional white Swiss wine and a red Pinot Noir bought by the glass. I still remember the cheese "trolley" cart being presented at the conclusion of the meal. I'm not exaggerating when I say the cart was six feet in length and displayed more cheeses than you would find in a specialty store.

 

At the conclusion of lunch, I asked to see the kitchen. The crew had gone for a break and the kitchen looked like a hospital surgery room. Spotless and ready for the next meal.

 

Thanks, Bob, for shaking my memory bank. I know Chef Giraret has retired. Oh, I also recall forgetting to convert Swiss Francs to Italian Lire. At the border, I didn't have Italian currency for a toll. I had to turn around and convert my Swiss money for entry into Italy.

 

Jack

[EMoe57]

Ok, we met Mom (such that she is)... any chance you plan for us to meet Dad?

[Jack Scribe]

Ok, we met Mom (such that she is)... any chance you plan for us to meet Dad?

Dad is only in the background for now. He may appear in the third series.

 

Jack

[Benji]

Dad is only in the background for now. He may appear in the third series.

 

Jack

 

 

........Well Green Valley High is one of the top in Scholastics in the west? I was surprised to hear that, I thought it was Centennial, but knowing you Jack, you did your homework. Being the father of a recently turned "21 year old" (GROAN) I haven't much contact with the areas High Schools other than what I get in the news. I don't know what kind of impact if having Crays dad show up in the story, would he contest the Foster parenting? Is he a good guy or a bad guy? Being out of Crays life for so long doesn't look good at this point.

[TalonRider]

Nice chapter Jack. Things seem to be going along pretty smoothly. But I've got a funny feeling, that something is about to happen that may slow things down.

 

The talk between Spike and Cray was heart warming. I think wasn't really mad at the by Spike, he was just having some fun with him. And the good night kiss was a nice touch in showing his brotherly affection to Gray.

[C James]

Nice chapter Jack. Things seem to be going along pretty smoothly. But I've got a funny feeling, that something is about to happen that may slow things down.

 

I get that feeling too.

 

The best laid plans of mice and men... ...

[Jack Scribe]

"The talk between Spike and Cray was heart warming. I think wasn't really mad at the by Spike, he was just having some fun with him. And the good night kiss was a nice touch in showing his brotherly affection to Cray."

 

Thanks for the comment, Jan. I was afraid I was bordering on writing soaked with too much saccharine.

 

"The best laid plans of mice and men... ... "

 

CJ, as your provide with your stories, there will be some speed bumps ahead. But, I'm really a romantic softie at heart.

 

Jack

[Benji]

"The talk between Spike and Cray was heart warming. I think wasn't really mad at the by Spike, he was just having some fun with him. And the good night kiss was a nice touch in showing his brotherly affection to Cray."

 

Thanks for the comment, Jan. I was afraid I was bordering on writing soaked with too much saccharine.

 

"The best laid plans of mice and men... ... "

 

CJ, as your provide with your stories, there will be some speed bumps ahead. But, I'm really a romantic softie at heart.

 

Jack

 

........Just read latest chapter, no speed bumps!! Interesting Mario's analogy of Cray winning the horse race. I can already see Crays future is being laid for him. Odd that Cray became a matchmaker, Can't wait for more chapters.....Great work Jack!!

[Jack Scribe]

........Just read latest chapter, no speed bumps!! Interesting Mario's analogy of Cray winning the horse race. I can already see Crays future is being laid for him. Odd that Cray became a matchmaker, Can't wait for more chapters.....Great work Jack!!

There may be some speed bumps in future chapters...the story is just getting underway. However, Cray is resilient and has acquired an unusual support group. I'm on a mini-vacation right now and will post two chapters next week to make up for nothing this week.

 

Jack

[Benji]

There may be some speed bumps in future chapters...the story is just getting underway. However, Cray is resilient and has acquired an unusual support group. I'm on a mini-vacation right now and will post two chapters next week to make up for nothing this week.

 

Jack

 

 

.......Another great chapter Jack, Cray & Henry seemed to have hit it off, a very interesting 48 hours for sure . Per my daughter, I know Centennial High had a acceptance level of gays, I wonder how Green Valley high school stands on it?

[Conner]

You're a man of your word, Jack. Two great chapters! Thanks

 

Cray must be thinking that he's died and gone to heaven. He deserves it all, though. Including Henry. Yes, that was a nice way to wake up in the morning.

 

Uncle Mario's a sweetheart.

 

So I'm thinking Spike's date with Lou went really well....the prince/frog metaphor was cool though.

 

More, please?

 

Conner

[TalonRider]

I'm thinking things are going to start getting a little more complicated with the introduction of Lou.

 

Neither Cray or Henry knew exactly what to do so they did what just felt natural to do.

 

Jan

[Jack Scribe]

I'm thinking things are going to start getting a little more complicated with the introduction of Lou.

 

Neither Cray or Henry knew exactly what to do so they did what just felt natural to do.

 

Jan

Things will get a little tense on occasion...down the road. Thanks, Jan, for pointing out the awkwardness of these two teens as they explored intimacy for the first time. That was my intention in the final scene of Ch. 8. Certain things just fall into place, however "basic".

 

Mario is a complicated man, Connor. He seems able to separate his profession with personal emotions. But, as you have seen, he's very good at what he does.

 

Other than the academic excellence of Green Valley High School, I don't know anything about the student's acceptance of gay students. In the story, I assume that most of the students with whom Cray comes in contact are able to deal with diversity.

 

Jack

[Benji]

Things will get a little tense on occasion...down the road. Thanks, Jan, for pointing out the awkwardness of these two teens as they explored intimacy for the first time. That was my intention in the final scene of Ch. 8. Certain things just fall into place, however "basic".

 

Mario is a complicated man, Connor. He seems able to separate his profession with personal emotions. But, as you have seen, he's very good at what he does.

 

Other than the academic excellence of Green Valley High School, I don't know anything about the student's acceptance of gay students. In the story, I assume that most of the students with whom Cray comes in contact are able to deal with diversity.

 

Jack

 

 

 

...........But..but Jack, there is no mob in Vegas anymore really they are all gone!! Great chapter, wonder how Cray's status will be after he gets a public apology from the bully? Shipping the guy to military school is a brilliant problem solver!!

[TalonRider]

...........But..but Jack, there is no mob in Vegas anymore really they are all gone!! Great chapter, wonder how Cray's status will be after he gets a public apology from the bully? Shipping the guy to military school is a brilliant problem solver!!

Even though it's not what he wants, Cray will soon get the reputation as 'someone not to mess with'. Part of the school will want to be friends with him and part of them will be afraid of him.

[Conner]

Even though it's not what he wants, Cray will soon get the reputation as 'someone not to mess with'. Part of the school will want to be friends with him and part of them will be afraid of him.

 

My thought was that Joe really overplayed his hand in terms of Cray's "connections". It's clear, though, that Joe has the final say. He is the boss. I'm just not so sure Joe has done him any favours here.

 

If Cray gets such a reputation, isn't that exactly what Joe wants to avoid? It may well happen, though. I'm hoping the other students will judge Cray by his actions and not his reputation.

 

Ok, so what if Cray can't handle all this "respect" he'll be getting? Maybe he'll become the new and improved Vinny Jr? I can just hear him now, "Hey, Timmy Twat, have your sweet ass in the sports equipment locker in 10 minutes! Oh yeah, if you know what's good for ya, bring lube!"

 

Ok, ok, that won't happen.

 

I'm most impressed with the way Mario handled this situation. Trying to settle things with Vinny first was a very wise move. It's best not to involve the boss unless necessary. Mario's got the smarts for buisness and politics.

 

Another great chapter, Jack! I'm going to have to award you a cliffhanger, though. I can't wait to listen to an apologetic Vinny Jr.

 

Conner

[Jack Scribe]

My thought was that Joe really overplayed his hand in terms of Cray's "connections". It's clear, though, that Joe has the final say. He is the boss. I'm just not so sure Joe has done him any favours here.

 

I'm most impressed with the way Mario handled this situation. Trying to settle things with Vinny first was a very wise move. It's best not to involve the boss unless necessary. Mario's got the smarts for buisness and politics.

 

I'm going to have to award you a cliffhanger, though. I can't wait to listen to an apologetic Vinny Jr.

 

Cray's primary goals right now are to blend in at school and make a few new friends. Oh, and maybe find a "special" buddy.

 

Joe, the boss, is first and foremost concerned about protecting his turf/business interests. He moved on the opportunity handed to him...get Vinny Jr outda there so the golden goose keeps...etc. With Mario, it's a combination of looking after his "nephew" and making a little power play.

 

Jack

[Benji]

Cray primary goals right now are to blend in at school and make a few new friends. Oh, and maybe find a "special" buddy.

 

Joe, the boss, is first and foremost concerned about protecting his turf/business interests. He moved on the opportunity handed to him...get Vinny Jr outda there so the golden goose keeps...etc. With Mario, it's a combination of looking after his "nephew" and making a little power play.

 

Jack

 

 

......and of course "Joe" answers to some suits from back east, of course there is no mob in Vegas anymore. Cray will get some unwanted noriety, I'm sure it will fizzle and he can return to a normal life.