[Jack Scribe] DESERT FANTASIES

[Tiger]

Enjoyed this chapter, Jack. Things are a little quieter in Vegas today. Cray and Michael are getting on well and Spike makes a major purchase. Cool.

I'm guessing that the latest chapter is the calm before the storm. It was a great chapter, as usual.

[TalonRider]

I'm guessing that the latest chapter is the calm before the storm. It was a great chapter, as usual.

I was thinking the same thing. A much bigger storm could be on the way.

[Jack Scribe]

I was thinking the same thing. A much bigger storm could be on the way.

The storm clouds have passed. This chapter was intentionally written to shift gears and lower the rpm's. The next couple of chapters are about relationships and making sure the 'ship is right'.

 

Jack

[C James]

The storm clouds have passed. This chapter was intentionally written to shift gears and lower the rpm's. The next couple of chapters are about relationships and making sure the 'ship is right'.

 

Jack

 

Hrmmm, Somehow I doubt that the troubles are over. A lul, perhaps?

 

One thing I have to say; you've done a brilliant job of conveying who and what "the family" is, without actually saying it. IMHO, that gives the story a much truer feel.

[Conner]

Did I mention that I have this fantasy about coming home and finding Mario and Spike in my bed?

 

Then there's the scene where I say, "Mario, Mario, wherefore art thou, Mario?" And then......

 

Ok, I'll stop.

 

Great chapter, Jack!

 

Conner

[Benji]

The storm clouds have passed. This chapter was intentionally written to shift gears and lower the rpm's. The next couple of chapters are about relationships and making sure the 'ship is right'.

 

Jack

 

 

.......Could be interesting with Spike's brother coming to town!

[GaryK]

Hi Jack. After several e-mail exchanges I finally made it to your forum as promised. Even though I told you at 12:45 AM Eastern that I was going to stop at Chapter 16, you're just too darned good a writer, and now here it is 3:25 AM Eastern and I just finished Chapter 21. Things have certainly been exciting, and I hope you're serious about taking a break from the recent excitement. I'm not sure I could handle any more killings or bombings right now. Although certainly there will be more of that in the future. Keep up the fantastic work you and your team are doing. I'm completely and thoroughly hooked on this story!

 

~gary.

[Jack Scribe]

Hi Jack. After several e-mail exchanges I finally made it to your forum as promised. Even though I told you at 12:45 AM Eastern that I was going to stop at Chapter 16, you're just too darned good a writer, and now here it is 3:25 AM Eastern and I just finished Chapter 21. Things have certainly been exciting, and I hope you're serious about taking a break from the recent excitement. I'm not sure I could handle any more killings or bombings right now. Although certainly there will be more of that in the future. Keep up the fantastic work you and your team are doing. I'm completely and thoroughly hooked on this story!

 

~gary.

Hey, Gary - Mr. Newbie! Glad you came over to GA and the forums. I'm glad you mentioned the "team". The editing each chapter goes through is quite a filtering process.

 

Drew Hunt - an excellent U.K. author - in the first 'go to' guy for initial reactions and some proofing. Next, I send the chapter to Brad, the comma queen , in Denver. Brad's a retired television news director and cleans up my gramatical screw-ups. Then to Vancouver Island and Trab. He's the guy who will remind me that a character did something a few chapters earlier that doesn't wash with a current situation. I think of him as an editor's editor. Finally, I use Rock in Austin. He has a great common-sense approach in making final suggestions.

 

The end result is a better story. Although I have final control, the advice is appreciated and these chefs don't spoil the broth.

 

Jack

[GaryK]

Thanks for the welcome.

 

I'd suggest you refer to Trab as your Continuity Editor. That's the offical term used in cinema, television and other art forms.

 

~gary.

Edited February 10, 2008 by GaryInMiami

[Jack Scribe]

Thanks for the welcome.

 

I'd suggest you refer to Trab as your Continuity Editor. That's the offical term used in cinema, television and other art forms.

 

~gary.

Continuity or incontinence? Thanks for pointing out a new title of which I wasn't familiar. Trab actually does that and much more.

 

Jack

[GaryK]

You're welcome.

 

Thankfully incontinence is not yet a problem for me!

[MikeL]

Chapter 21, "Hark the Heralds Early", of Desert Fantasies has been posted.

[GaryK]

Hi Mike. It was great seeing an e-mail notice in my InBox this morning. Even better when I got here and found out the new chapter had been posted. Thanks for the notice!

 

Jack, this was a great chapter. I won't go into any details cause I don't want to spoil it for everyone else. All I'll say is you handled things in your usual tasteful manner. I think that's one of the things I like most about your style of writing. Thanks.

[MikeL]

Hi Mike. It was great seeing an e-mail notice in my InBox this morning. Even better when I got here and found out the new chapter had been posted. Thanks for the notice!

 

Jack, this was a great chapter. I won't go into any details cause I don't want to spoil it for everyone else. All I'll say is you handled things in your usual tasteful manner. I think that's one of the things I like most about your style of writing. Thanks.

Hi Gary. Welcome to the forum. We've got a great story going here. Cray and Michael are one hot couple!

 

Thanks, Jack for another great chapter. The chapter title finally made sense at the end. What a nice surprise for Cray. I'm ready for the next chapter when you are.

[TalonRider]

Call me paranoid, but I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, so to speak. My first thought when they didn't spot Bob right away was, Oh shit. Now what? But it turned out to a nice little surprise for all.

[GaryK]

The only problem I had with the surprise at the end was I thought both Drew and Bob should have been there. This was, after all, a very special occasion, and IMO it demanded both parents be there to make it clear it was a gift from both of them. I know in Cray's mind it was clearly a parental gift. Still, I can't help feeling the way I do.

 

Thanks for the warm welcome Mike. Cray and Michael are indeed a hot couple. As I mentioned to Jack I'm so happy that after all Cray's been though he can still feel love and enjoy sex. He's an amazing young man.

 

One of the things I like about Jack though is the diversity of characters and storylines. I never know what's going to happen next and that's part of why I'm so hooked on this story.

[wolfwalker]

Am I th eonly one who thinks the last line of Cray's thoughts is more of a jinx LOL

 

 

quote name='MikeL' date='February 4 2008, 01:02 PM' post='109887']

Chapter 21 of Desert Fantasies, "The Fat Lady Sings" has been posted.

[GaryK]

Initially it seemed a little ominous to me, too.

 

Then I reminded myself what Cray has already been through and I can't imagine his situation ever being as bad as it was before he left Provo.

 

Then again, Jack can conjure up some big shockers so who knows what the future holds? I can imagine a situation where Drew and Bob inadvertently get drawn into the reprisals that are bound to happen as a result of this whole Russian thing and it having an effect on Cray. I mean, if Bob and Drew somehow managed to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and get killed it would be devastating to Cray. He's a resilient young man but a person can only take so much before they snap.

 

I guess the never ending plot twists are one part of what makes this such an interesting read.

 

Hey Jack, you'd better not do anything awful to Drew and Bob.

[Conner]

Great Valentine's gift, Jack! Thanks!

 

So what did I think of the chapter? That's easy...

 

 

 

Conner

[Jack Scribe]

Hey Jack, you'd better not do anything awful to Drew and Bob.

Doing anything awful to Drew and Bob would be like committing author's hari-kari. In a story, main characters can experience difficulties BUT they must be creatively extracted at some point.

 

The last line expressing Cray's thoughts was meant to finish the chapter (actually 22) on a positive note. Consider that he fled Utah in the summer and it's now approaching Christmas. A crazy five months. I must admit I loved using a variation of the famous line that begins A Tale of Two Cities.

 

The absence of Drew would be understood by Cray because of his other dad's responsibilities at work. He knew that the gift was from both. We can assume that the family unit celebrated together later at their home.

 

Jack

[TalonRider]

Doing anything awful to Drew and Bob would be like committing author's hari-kari. In a story, main characters can experience difficulties BUT they must be creatively extracted at some point.

 

The last line expressing Cray's thoughts was meant to finish the chapter (actually 22) on a positive note. Consider that he fled Utah in the summer and it's now approaching Christmas. A crazy five months. I must admit I loved using a variation of the famous line that begins A Tale of Two Cities.

 

The absence of Drew would be understood by Cray because of his other dad's responsibilities at work. He knew that the gift was from both. We can assume that the family unit celebrated together later at their home.

 

Jack

It has been quite a roller coaster ride so far. I have to agree, that was a nice way to end the chapter. I'm sure Drew would have been there if he could have, and I have to agree, Cray would understand.

 

Jan

[GaryK]

Thanks to both of you for making it clear Cray would understand why Drew couldn't be there. I should have known better. When I got my first car my dad took me to get it. I was told it was from both parents even though I knew it was my father's money that was paying for it. Still, it seemed odd that my mother didn't want to come along. Maybe it was just a "guy" thing. In Cray's case I was certain that both dads contributed money for the car. That's what prompted my comment about Drew being absent.

 

I'm glad the chapter really did end on a positive note. Now I won't be as anxious while I wait for the next chapter.

 

A Tale of Two Cities is a great historical novel. I guess it contains two of the most famous lines in all of literature since almost everyone I know is familiar with both of them. You really took liberties with the opening line, but that's alright. It was a great way to close the chapter, . I really hope the worst of times are behind Cray now.

 

I hope you all don't mind me being so forward considering I'm a new member. I don't want to seem rude. I really enjoy Jack's stories and having a forum to discuss stuff is so much better than just corresponding with Jack via e-mail like I used to do.

 

This is how I feel about you and your stories Jack:

[TalonRider]

No need to apologize, Gary. It's always good to see new people jump right in and give their opinion. I sometimes will write to the author if I have something to say and I don't want to say it publicly. Authors do like feedback, both publicly and privately.

 

Jan

[C James]

Things seem to be simmering down on the "war" front, and I loved the car scene... I especially liked the concluding Dickens paraphrase, but I have to wonder... Are things going too good? In other words, is another shoe about to drop? (What can I say; I'm paranoid... )

 

Great chapter, Jack!

[GaryK]

Thanks Jan. I'll make sure to stay in touch with Jack both publicly and privately.

 

CJ, what a coincidence you just posted here! I spent part of yesterday and most of today reading For The Love. Keep an eye out for an ego-boosting e-mail from me tomorrow.

 

I'm so glad Jack pointed me to Gay Authors. Nifty will never see me again. It took too much weeding through crap to find the good stuff. This is the kind of place I've been trying to find for years!