Make us laugh!

[glitteryantlers]

For Valkyrie: Happy (belated) World Penguin Day!

 

 

[glitteryantlers]

Someone should write a crossover between Born wolf and Meta! Pleeeese!

 

[Puppilull]

Someone should write a crossover between Born wolf and Meta! Pleeeese!

 

Just do it! It would be awesome!

[Drew Espinosa]

Abbott and Costello always crack me up

 

Edited April 27, 2016 by Drew Espinosa

[glitteryantlers]

 

Today I would actually run for rum 

[Slytherin]

 

[paya]

Funny things about us (or me, when you like it, especially for sandrewn for thinking of me sometimes :-) How do you know you are Hungarian

 

1. you use sour cream more than ketchup.

 

2. nobody can properly pronounce your last name.

 

3. nobody can properly pronounce your first name.

 

4. sausages hanging in your grandfather’s auto repair shop is normal

 

5. Paprika is just as important as salt & pepper on the table and in food

 

6. half of your grandmother’s friends’ husbands’ have the name József

 

7. a family member thinks you are crazy and yells at you because you don’t wear slippers around the house at all times to prevent yourself from catching a cold

 

8. meeting another Hungarian in a country outside of Hungary is amazing

 

9. you know the phrase “three is the Hungarian truth”

 

10. people wanna show off by saying that they know your capital: Bucharest! And no, they are not joking.

 

11. you can swear for 5 minutes straight, with one breath, not using the same word, ever.

 

12. you know why the bells of every church ring every day at noon.

 

13. you watched Walt Disney cartoons each Sunday at 3:30 p.m.

 

14. your parents had at least a Lada, Kispolszki or a Trabant.

 

15. your grandma makes the best pancakes (palacsinta)

 

16. your grandparents drink pálinka like water.

 

17. you do too.

 

18. everything has powdered sugar on it

 

19. refuse more food and you automatically have an eating disorder

 

20. someone says that Hungarian “is like Russian and all those other Slavic languages,” and then you have to go into great detail about the origins of Hungarian with a scolding history lesson

 

21. you have difficulty pronouncing words in English, but you’re capable of creating long and meaningful sentences using only “E” vowels in you mother tongue

 

22. you tell someone that you are Hungarian, they ask “Are you hungry?” Then you congratulate them on being the millionth person to say that to you

 

23. you, being a girl, smell like a mixture of 20 different perfumes on Easter Monday.

 

24. you, being a boy, run around with your mother’s old perfumes to earn more red Easter eggs on Easter Monday.

 

25. you don’t see ham for a year after Easter or fish after Christmas.

 

26. you struggle to survive on August 20th to watch the fireworks (national holiday celebration).

 

27. you and your family are always spending your vacation at Balaton.

 

28. you never heard anybody say anything positive about politics.

 

29. you wish you would get 5 bucks everytime somebody says “I know a hungarian word… bazdmeg… *laugh*…”

 

30. you don’t know at least half of the people at family celebrations.

 

31. nobody believes that you don’t understand Finnish.

 

32. you keep an old black and white TV or any other useless object because maybe one day it will be good for something

 

33. you think that “Téli szalámi” (winter salami) is the best pepperoni in the world.

 

34. you have the largest collection of plastic bags in the world, but will still take loads from Tesco or Auchan

 

35. you don’t buy tickets for public transport (it's like some kind of national sport not being caught)

 

36. you had symbols in preschool to identify your stuff

 

37. you can say “megszentségteleníthetetlenségeskedéseitekért”

 

When you combine 11 and 28, you have a full day of activity

What??? 37 points and not one mentions lángos? :-o

[Daddydavek]

What??? 37 points and not one mentions lángos? :-o

 

I had to look it up.....it's a deep fried flat bread.

Edited April 28, 2016 by Daddydavek

[glitteryantlers]

What??? 37 points and not one mentions lángos? :-o

Of course there was originally a point with lángos. I cut a few with too much Hungarian or contemporary references. 

 

Something along the lines of being unable to enjoy a day at the strand (water park) without having lángos. 

 

Now I found a few other good ones:

 

You Know You’re Hungarian When…

1. When your parents come to visit for 3 weeks and you all stay in a one bedroom apartment.

2. When feeding your guests is your main priority even if they claim they’re not hungry and in which case you get slightly offended/upset that they don’t want your hospitality.

3. When you know what Unicum is and prefer it over Jägermeister.

4. When you know how to open a bottle of wine with only a screw and a pair of pliers. 

5. When you’ve heard, "If you’re hungry, why not go to Turkey?" at least once in your life.

6. When you have a relative who’s named Attila (my nephew), Géza, József, János (my grandfather) or László (my father, father-in-law and brother-in-law) .

7. When you know that the "goulash" you see in many restaurants has actuality little/nothing to do with the gulyas leves we really eat.

8. When you know the meaning of "kurva" even if you don’t know any other Hungarian word. (But you could be from Poland too)

9. When you love Túró Rudi but cant really explain to foreigners what the hell that is untill they try it. 

10. When your foreign friends ask you if you still believe that Santa Claus brings the presents on the night between December 24th-25th… then you answer somehow confused that Santa Claus brings the presents on the 6th of December and it is actually Little Jesus who brings the presents on Christmas, but the presents are already there on the 24th at 6PM.

11. When a pancake is extremely flat in your country and you roll it up instead of folding it.

12. When you know what TÚRÓ is.

13. When you leave your house for longer than 2 hours, you make sure there’s enough sandwiches, apples, bottled tap water, coffee in a thermos, and chocolate bars packed for everyone to survive (without spending a dime)!

14. When you do not speak with your mouth full.

15. When guys keep telling you that Hungarian girls are the cutest and prettiest and hope that you just believe it and they get laid.

16. When you go into a Chinese restaurant and order your Sechuan chicken with french fries, cucumber salad and ask for a few slices of bread as well.

17. When you have a little funny accent in every other language you speak. (Not really funny to be called somehow not Slavic, maybe Turkish, but cute :-P)

18. When you love Mákos Guba and you can’t explain what MÁK is, neither GUBA to anyone.. and if you finally can, everyone will think you’re some kind of weirdo/junkee for eating that.

19. When you start counting on your hand with one being the thumb.

20. When you can show off your engagement ring, worn on the opposite hand. (Accurate for a few other counties as well. I love TimothyM's descriptions of it :-)

21. When you have more excuses for the controllers than you have tickets.

22. When the train hasn’t even left the station, but you are already eating your home made sandwiches (usually with half a paprika or tomato in it).

23. When you tell everybody that Hungarian people always criticize everything.

24. When the home-made sandwiches on the train/in the cinema/in the opera include Wienerschnitzel.

25. When you call a 79 km long lake (the Balaton) the Hungarian Sea. And you are able to swim across it!

26. When you have to pay in a wedding if you want to dance with the bride.

27. When you can eat ANYTHING deep fried (with breadcrumbs on it) and can make spirits (pálinka) of (almost) EVERYTHING, including paprika of course!

28. When you NEVER leave home with wet hair because you can get a cold and you ALWAYS bring your hair dryer when going abroad, and are astonished when people do not have one in their own homes!

29. When you sit always on the same place and chair, even when the (class)room is empty and "your" place is in the end of the room.

30. When zou cant tzpe on and english kezboard because y and z are mixed up.

31. When you know the difference between s and sz. and also u and ü.

32. When you tend to feel sorry for yourself for no particular reason and complain a lot. (Nowadays called complaining culture.)

33. When you are more creative in cheating then any other nationality.

34. When your language has two words for love.

35. When you have szaloncukor on a Christmas tree!

36. When you have a nameday and no one foreign understands what that is good for. (Except for Game of Thrones fans, but that is not the same either.)

[TalonRider]

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt.

 

It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.

 

If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

 

If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving isn’t your sport.

 

Some days you’re the bug; some days you’re the windshield.

 

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.

 

There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

 

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

[glitteryantlers]

[Slytherin]

 

 

 

LOL

[glitteryantlers]

If the giant bear was blue, I would be posivite it's slytherin

 

[sandrewn]

I wish I had thought of this! I actually had to get a loan (mom) to buy lemons and sugar. Plus our freezer had a gazillion ice cubes in it for a while (1950s). My down fall was allowing all my friends to run a tab and not hiring an enforcer to collect.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sandrewn

Edited April 30, 2016 by sandrewn

[Slytherin]

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sandrewn

I can't see your post

 

Edited May 1, 2016 by slytherin

[glitteryantlers]

I can't see your post

 

 

 

 

Can you see it now?

Edited May 1, 2016 by glitteryantlers

[clochette]

[JamesSavik]

 

I'm no bigot but I REALLY don't want to share a bathroom with Cthulhu... 

[Valkyrie]

 

I'm no bigot but I REALLY don't want to share a bathroom with Cthulhu... 

I'd be more worried about sharing a bathroom with a teletubby...

[glitteryantlers]

Speaking of all-gender: what's the female form of lumberjack? lumberjane? 

 

https://i.chzbgr.com/full/8774097664/h3C529765/

[Puppilull]

 

I'm no bigot but I REALLY don't want to share a bathroom with Cthulhu...

 

You never know what's their agenda, the slippery suckers...

 

[Valkyrie]

Only fans of "Keeping Up Appearances" will understand this.   

 

[Reader1810]

Only fans of "Keeping Up Appearances" will understand this. 

 

 

I'd have loved to see her reaction to this!

[Slytherin]

Only fans of "Keeping Up Appearances" will understand this. 

 

 

LOL "It's Bouquet" Love that show

 

Very bad Penguins !

Edited May 2, 2016 by slytherin

[Zombie]

hahahahaha love the handbag of the penguin on the left - probably put the other one up to it