Jump to content

ISO: Editor and Beta for Fall Anthology Story


comicfan

Recommended Posts

Okay, I have no desire to be last minute for the Fall Anthology. My story is already written. What I need are two brave souls to read and edit this. The story is nine pages long and just over 4,000 words. It is written in word.

 

Warnings - This is not my usual light and happy story stuff. This is dark, deals with abuse and rape. Putting it out there before anyone agrees to touch or help with this. If you are not comfortable with the topics touched on do not feel you need to agree to work with me.

 

What I am looking for in a beta. God knows I am not perfect. I forget words, skip important ideas, because, well the story makes perfect sense in my head. I need you to point out where I went wrong. Where do I need more detail? Where do I need more dialogue? Are there places I went overboard and need to cut back? I need you to be honest and let me know where you see problems. I depend on a beta to keep me honest and make the story come to life. You are the first reader of my tale and I depend on you to help me make it presentable to the world.

 

What I am looking for an editor - You poor soul are final set of eyes. What did I miss concerning punctuation? Do I still have misspelled words? Are my tenses correct? God forbid but did the beta and I miss something important that as you went through you couldn't help but cringe and want to make the suggest to change? Notice I am not asking you to rewrite my story or put it into your words. Just help me make the story I wrote flow so everyone can enjoy it with as few mistakes as possible.

 

I've title the story Body and Soul.

 

Here is a sample so you can decide if this is what you want to tackle.

 

I finally left him. Who would have thought I would have the courage to do it? I sure as hell didn’t. I mean when you have a roof over your head and are mainly left alone you can handle a lot.

“Please, just lie still sir. I know you are in pain but we have to get this IV in and then we can adjust the breathing tube. Nancy, please let Dr. Avold know he is awake.”

I hear them run around me like ants trying to patch me up. They seem to think the scars they see are the worst. They should only know the truth.

“I want the dose high to begin with. He has massive injuries and I don’t want him to wake up. We are going to have to induce a coma to give his body time to heal.”

Heal? They make it sound so easy. Like time is going make all of my life knit up and produce a normal human being. I would laugh if it wasn’t so sad. Every inch of my body could be scarred and bleeding and it wouldn’t even touch the damage done to me. My life has been nothing but one of being told no.

“I think his eyes moved. Can you hear me? If you can would you squeeze my hand?”

My hand was so small, but then again I was small. I was barely five at the time. I think that was the first time I realized I wasn’t like everyone I knew. I was just a broken shell that everyone would be able to beat on. The first person to teach me that was my father.

“I told you to eat what is on your plate, Ronald.”

“I don’t like brussels sprouts. They’re gross.” I sat there with my arms crossed facing my father. “I’m not eating them.”

“You’ll eat what I feed you.” He got up from his chair and knelt beside me. He grabbed some sprouts off my plate and turned to face me. “Open your mouth!”

I shut my mouth tight and shook my head no.

SMACK! His hand crashed into the side of my face with such force I fell out of the chair and began to cry. My father pulled me back into the chair, forced my mouth open, shoved the sprouts in, and slammed his hand over my mouth. “Swallow you little bastard.”

 

 

Link to comment

Val,

 

Don't want you to think I forgot you. Just got it back from Russ. Will need to work on this and then will send it to you. Didn't pay to send it to you before the suggestions for corrections and expansions were done.

 

Wayne

  • Like 1
Link to comment
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Our Privacy Policy can be found here: Privacy Policy. We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue..