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On 3/19/2018 at 1:45 AM, Valkyrie said:

Granted!  You are now a ninja :ph34r: Not that kind of ninja... a top of the line Ninja blender! :D  

 

Image result for ninja blender

 

I wish I had a mojito :D 

Granted, but you've developed a severe allergic reaction to alcohol. 

 

I wish I could just relax in bed today.

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  • 1 month later...
On 5/16/2018 at 7:45 PM, Drew Espinosa said:

Granted, but your bed is ridden by bedbugs.

 

I wish I could be a Hogwarts student.

Granted. You've become Goyle.

 

I wish I could go to England.

Edited by comicfan
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14 minutes ago, comicfan said:

Granted. You've become Goyle.

 

I wish I could go to England.

 

Granted. While at the airport, you get mugged and shoved into a crate. You come to surrounded by security in Heathrow. They don't believe your story and you spend three months in a holding cell.

 

I wish a steak place delivered.

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5 minutes ago, drpaladin said:

 

Granted. While at the airport, you get mugged and shoved into a crate. You come to surrounded by security in Heathrow. They don't believe your story and you spend three months in a holding cell.

 

I wish a steak place delivered.

Granted.  A steak place delivers; however, it's nowhere near where you live and they only deliver vegan food.  :puke: 

 

I wish the cats would clean my house and do a good job.  

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18 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  A steak place delivers; however, it's nowhere near where you live and they only deliver vegan food.  :puke: 

 

I wish the cats would clean my house and do a good job.  

+

Granted. They do a good job, but they clean it the same way they clean themselves. They lick everything.

 

I wish I could stop thinking of the steak Val is determined I can't have.  lol

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2 minutes ago, drpaladin said:

+

Granted. They do a good job, but they clean it the same way they clean themselves. They lick everything.

 

I wish I could stop thinking of the steak Val is determined I can't have.  lol

Well, this is corrupt a wish ;) 

 

Granted.  You can have a steak, but it's so overcooked the Sabres could use it as a hockey puck.  :unsure:  

 

Now I wish I had a steak.  :gikkle: A fresh steak cooked perfectly rare, seasoned well, with garlic mashed potatoes and gravy.  :) 

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6 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Well, this is corrupt a wish ;) 

 

Granted.  You can have a steak, but it's so overcooked the Sabres could use it as a hockey puck.  :unsure:  

 

Now I wish I had a steak.  :gikkle: A fresh steak cooked perfectly rare, seasoned well, with garlic mashed potatoes and gravy.  :) 

 

Granted. The steak is sublimely delicious. However, as you are leaving the restaurant is shut down in a massive raid due to an virulent epidemic of mad cow disease compounded by botulism.

 

I was able to resuscitate my overcooked steak. Now I want some blackberry cobbler with vanilla ice cream.

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2 hours ago, drpaladin said:

 

Granted. The steak is sublimely delicious. However, as you are leaving the restaurant is shut down in a massive raid due to an virulent epidemic of mad cow disease compounded by botulism.

 

I was able to resuscitate my overcooked steak. Now I want some blackberry cobbler with vanilla ice cream.

Oh there's no resuscitating that steak.  Granted.  You have blackberry cobbler that was made three months ago and left in the back of the fridge.  The vanilla ice cream isn't much better, I'm afraid.  It's been melted and refrozen so many times it's more ice cube than ice cream. 

 

I wish my heartburn would go away.  *burp* 

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26 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Oh there's no resuscitating that steak.  Granted.  You have blackberry cobbler that was made three months ago and left in the back of the fridge.  The vanilla ice cream isn't much better, I'm afraid.  It's been melted and refrozen so many times it's more ice cube than ice cream. 

 

I wish my heartburn would go away.  *burp* 

 

Granted. Your heartburn transforms into abdominal cramps.

 

I wish I knew when or if this yard guy is coming back. He leaves his tools and just disappears.

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1 minute ago, drpaladin said:

 

Granted. Your heartburn transforms into abdominal cramps.

 

I wish I knew when or if this yard guy is coming back. He leaves his tools and just disappears.

Granted.  He's not coming back.  Ever. 

 

I wish you hadn't granted my wish so literally... :unsure: 

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5 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  He's not coming back.  Ever. 

 

I wish you hadn't granted my wish so literally... :unsure: 

Apologies.  :hug:

 

Granted. The cramps pass, but you know what that means.

 

I wish I hadn't thought of cramps. Now I have them.

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1 minute ago, drpaladin said:

Apologies.  :hug:

 

Granted. The cramps pass, but you know what that means.

 

I wish I hadn't thought of cramps. Now I have them.

Well you knew that dried husk of a steak and tainted cobbler wouldn't sit well :gikkle:  :hug:  

 

Granted.  You never thought of cramps. They thought of you, instead. 😛  

 

I wish I hadn't slept all afternoon.  

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1 minute ago, comicfan said:

Granted, you slept for a week instead.

 

Wish the bills were paid.

Granted.  The bills are all paid.  One dollar off the total of each.  :gikkle: 

 

I wish my foot didn't hurt.  

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  • 2 months later...
On 6/25/2018 at 3:32 AM, comicfan said:

Granted,  you don't notice your foot pain cause you smacked your hip into the table and it has your focus now.

 

Wish I could go to Disneyworld. 

 

Your wish is granted, you can go to Disney World, as the toilet cleaner.

 

I wish I could win the lottery jackpot.

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32 minutes ago, cognac69 said:

 

Your wish is granted, you can go to Disney World, as the toilet cleaner.

 

I wish I could win the lottery jackpot.

Congratulations!  You've won the lottery!  Unfortunately, the government has imposed so many taxes, you actually owe them money.  :unsure:  

 

I wish my bathroom remodel was completed.  

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6 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

Congratulations!  You've won the lottery!  Unfortunately, the government has imposed so many taxes, you actually owe them money.  :unsure:  

 

I wish my bathroom remodel was completed.  

 

The bathroom remodel is completed and looks fantastic, but a leak in the plumbing has completely wrecked the rest of the house and it it needs to be ripped back out to be repaired.

 

I wish that the gut in apartment above would stop playing his music so loud.

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14 minutes ago, cognac69 said:

 

The bathroom remodel is completed and looks fantastic, but a leak in the plumbing has completely wrecked the rest of the house and it it needs to be ripped back out to be repaired.

 

I wish that the gut in apartment above would stop playing his music so loud.

Granted.  The music stops, but now he's having a very loud argument with his wife and stomping all around the floor. 

 

I wish my dinner turns out as good as the recipe looks. 

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20 hours ago, Valkyrie said:

Granted.  The music stops, but now he's having a very loud argument with his wife and stomping all around the floor. 

 

I wish my dinner turns out as good as the recipe looks. 

 

Granted, not only does it look as good as the recipe it tastes just like the paper it's written on too.

 

I wish I could afford a round the world cruise.

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Just now, cognac69 said:

 

Granted, not only does it look as good as the recipe it tastes just like the paper it's written on too.

 

I wish I could afford a round the world cruise.

Granted.  You are on a round the cruise!  Unfortunately, the 'ship' turns out to be an overcrowded, leaky yacht with subpar food and rude staff.  And the seas are bad and you are out of Dramamine.  :puke:  

 

I wish I had a new car. 

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5 minutes ago, cognac69 said:

granted you can choose between a Ferrari, Rolls Royce, Porsche and a Lexus, all of which are child size pedal cars.

 

I wish I had unlimited wishes

I am delighted to grant this wish :D  You now have unlimited wishes.  Unfortunately, they're all corrupted as badly as all the wishes in this thread.  :unsure: 

 

I wish I had a cookie.  

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4 minutes ago, Valkyrie said:

I am delighted to grant this wish :D  You now have unlimited wishes.  Unfortunately, they're all corrupted as badly as all the wishes in this thread.  :unsure: 

 

I wish I had a cookie.  

 

granted you have a cookie, it's here in the UK, but can you get here before the dog eats it.

 

I wish I could sing like Pavarotti

Edited by cognac69
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