My Brother Daniel - 12. Chapter 12

I wake to the smell of frying bacon. For a moment I can’t work it out, then I remember Sara. Smiling, I get out of bed and wander out to the kitchen.

“Good afternoon, sleepy. I was about to come wake you so you can have a shower and get dressed before lunch.”

“Lunch? Shouldn’t it be breakfast?”

“You can call it breakfast if you want, but it’s three in the afternoon so I’d prefer to call it lunch.”

“Three? Bloody hell. Why didn’t you call me sooner?”

“What was the point? Nothing was happening, so you might as well catch up on your sleep. It was almost six am when you went to sleep in the first place.” She yawns. “Tell you the truth, I caught a few hours myself on the sofa.”

“Fabulous. Shall I take a shower now?”

“It’s up to you. I suggest you do because you might be quiet anxious to leave straight after lunch?”

A brick lands in my stomach and I fill with fear. “What do you mean, leave?”

Sara gives me a soft look. “He really has got you good. Relax, it’s nothing bad. If you remember, you promised to go to the police station this morning – afternoon, and I have an incentive to get that over with as soon as possible.”

“What’s that?” My spirits rise only slightly at the prospect of going to the police station.

“My mother called and it’s looking as if Daniel can come home this afternoon. The doctor is coming to see him at about five and if it’s okay with him he can leave. All the signs are looking good and the nurses seem to think the doctor’s visit is just a formality so, as soon as we finish up at the police station we’ll go straight to the hospital.”

Finally, my heart soars. Daniel’s coming home. By tonight he’ll be in my arms. Everything will be as it should be again.

“Here,” Sara reaches into her pocket and hands me my phone. “Daniel’s rung five times. I told him I’d wake you at about three and ask you to ring so he’s probably watching the clock. You’ve got about thirty seconds before you’re late.”

My fingers are trembling when I press the speed dial. The phone rings and is instantly answered. “Rayn?”

Daniel sounds different today, wide awake and excited. “Sure is, babe.”

“I’m coming home. Will you come get me?” I hear Lily in the background and Daniel huffs. “Mam says I have to wait until the doctor comes to tell me I can go but I’m not going to listen to him. I’m bored and I miss you, so I’m coming home.”

“Well, I’ll be there soon, so you won’t be bored anymore, and if the doctor says you have to stay another night I’ll stay with you.”

“But I don’t want to be here for another night. I’m all better now and I want to come home.”

“If you’re all better the doctor will let you come home so stop worrying. Sara is making me lunch and then I have… a few errands to do and then I’ll come straight to the hospital and stay with you.”

“For how long?”

“As long as it takes.”

“Okay. Bye then. See you soon.”

Daniel is not one to hang around talking on a phone when everything’s been said and I smile at the handset after he hangs up.

“Everything okay?”

“It’s Daniel,” I say dreamily with a huge smile on my face, “Of course everything’s okay.”

“Alright then dreamboat, get your arse in the shower. Don’t be long. This is nearly done.”

****

By the time we get to the hospital I’m exhausted again. We’d been in the police station for more than two hours and my head is throbbing. God, if that’s what happens when you’re the victim of crime I hate to imagine what would happen if I were accused of something.

We’re making our way across the foyer when I hear my name shouted. I turn just in time to avoid being knocked right off my feet.

“Rayn, where have you been? We’ve been waiting for ages. I want to go home now, please.”

I hold on to Daniel as if I’ll die if I let go. That’s kind of how I feel. To have Daniel in my arms again when I thought I never would is amazing.

“You look good.”

“I know, take me home.”

“Come on then.”

Linking my arm with Daniel’s we stroll towards the door while Lily and Sara speak quietly behind us. Daniel is very quiet all the way home, holding on tightly to my arm and leaning his head on my shoulder.

“Are you alright?” I ask for what must be the sixth or seventh time.

Just like all the other times he looks up at me with his wide blue eyes and smiles. “Yes, I’m fine.” He cuddles up tighter and I put my arm around him. He wriggles out. “It’s more comfortable the other way,” he says and snuggles his head on my shoulder again.

When we get to Daniel’s house he bounces out, then stops and looks back at me. “You’re not going are you?”

“No, I’m not going anywhere, except inside. It’s really cold out here.”

Daniel looks up. “Do you think it’s going to snow? It would be great if it snowed. It’s only a week until Christmas.”

“Don’t you think it would be cold on the reindeer hooves if it was snowing?”

Daniel laughs and shakes his head, as we hurry into the house and start divesting our outdoor clothes. “If they were real it might. It would look so pretty. I love snow. If it snows will you make a snowman with me?”

“Of course I will. I love making snowmen.”

Daniel sidles up to me and looks up with his innocent eyes twinkling. “Have you got a present for me?”

“You’ll have to wait and see. It’s only a week.”

“Please, Rayn, Plee…eee…eze. Just tell me if you’ve got me one. I promise I won’t ask what it is.”

It’s almost impossible to resist Daniel when he’s like this. He’s the most adorable creature in the word. “Alright. Yes, I’ve got you a present. I’ve got you lots of presents but I’m not going to tell you what they are.”

Daniel absolutely beams. “I’ve got presents for you, too. I bought them out of my own money. I chose them and paid for them and wrapped them.” His smile fades. “I thought I wasn’t going to get to give them to you.”

“Well, now you know you are, and I can’t wait. We’ll all be together for Christmas and it’ll be fun.”

“Can I stay with you Christmas Eve and open our presents together on Christmas Day?”

“I think your mother and Sara will want you to be with them on Christmas Morning,” I say carefully, watching Sara’s face.

“But they’ve had me every year and this is out first. Please, Rayn. Please say I can. Sara won’t mind, will you?”

Sara looks like a deer caught in headlights. She exchanges glances with Lily who smiles and nods. “No, Daniel,” Sara said, “I don’t mind. Just so long as you come and have dinner with us.”

“Of course we will. Rayn’s not a very good cook, and neither am I because I’m not allowed to use the oven.”

“Hasn’t Rayn taught you to use the oven yet?” Lily teased. “He’s taught you so many other things.”

Daniel giggles and throws himself onto the sofa, pulling me down with him. “He definitely has. Things you couldn’t have taught me.”

I cringe, recognising the flirting tone. “Yeah, and maybe we won’t talk about them just now.”

“Really? Daniel gives me a totally angelic look. “I was talking about History things.”

“Yeah right you were.”

“Anyway,” he says, “I can’t use an oven because I can’t be trusted to get the numbers right, and not to burn myself, and not to forget there’s something in there. Sara said.” Sara glares at him and he grins. “Well, I did nearly burn the house down once, because I forgot there was something in the oven, then I panicked when it was on fire and dropped it on the floor.” He shrugs. “It’s a stone floor, and I would have thrown water on it, but Sara freaked.”

“Yeah right.”

“I can use the microwave, though. Rayn taught me. He has a book and he writes it in words so I can understand. He’s put colour dots on the numbers too and I can work that out easily.”

“Well, well. We never thought of that. Writing numbers in words.”

“I can do it if it’s in words.”

“You can, indeed. We’ll have to see what we can do with other things. Rayn’s been good for you, darling. You’re growing up in front of my eyes.”

“I’ve been a grown up for ages.”

“There are all kinds of ways of growing up, honey.”

“Have I done them all now?”

Lily leaned down and kissed him on the forehead. “You’re getting there. Now, what would you like for dinner. It’s your choice.”

Daniel thinks for a moment, then frowns and looks up at me. “I was going to stay with you, wasn’t I? The night it happened. Can I stay with you tonight instead?”

“I don’t think that would be a good idea, Daniel,” Sara says. “You’ve just come out of hospital. You need to stay here where we can keep an eye on you.”

“I’m better now, and Rayn can keep an eye on me.”

“I’d rather not, Daniel. I’d be so scared if we were on our own and something happened. Sara and your mother are used to it, they can handle it.”

“Nothing’s going to happen. Besides, when we’re married you’re going to have to handle me on your own.”

“Married?” Sara gasped, shock and horror on her face.

Rayn smiled, used to Daniel’s way of having them married with kids every five minutes. He’d picked out names and everything. “Don’t worry, Daniel has us married and settled with dozens of kids. He’s chosen all the names. I haven’t had a look in.”

“And when is this marriage meant to happen?”

“Oh ages,” Daniel says with a shrug. “Rayn hasn’t even asked me yet. It will probably be years, but there’s no harm in being prepared. I’m not getting any younger, you know.”

Sara chokes and Lily has to leave the room. “I’ll tell you what,” Lily says, coming back into the room. “Why doesn’t Rayne stay here with you tonight and you can stay with him tomorrow?”

“Really? Rayne can stay with me? In my bed?”

“Yes, but no hanky panky.”

Daniel smiles his innocent, angelic smile. ”I promise,” he says and Lily shakes her head.

“I mean it, Daniel. Any nonsense and Rayne won’t be staying here again.”

“That’s okay, we’ll go to Rayn’s then.”

“You’re mother’s right. It’s her house and it would be disrespectful to do something that makes her uncomfortable, especially when she’s told you specifically she doesn’t want it.”

“It isn’t my mother’s house,” he says mutinously, “It’s Sara’s.”

“Sara says the same thing.” She glares at him. “Promise no funny stuff or Rayn has to leave.”

For a moment Daniel looks as if he’s about to say something, then tosses his head and stalks out. He pauses in the doorway. “It’s alright Rayn, I’ll fu…fuck you senseless to…morrow.”

“Daniel!” Lily exclaims in shock, but Daniel laughs and disappears before she can get out another word.

“What is that boy like? He’ll be the death of me.”

Five minutes later, Daniel appears, rubbing his eyes. “I’m tired. Can I go to sleep now? Can Rayn come?”

“Oh right,” Sara says.” Tired is it?” Sara said with a smile. “It’s not some ploy to get Rayn into bed or anything?”

“No Sara,” he says, sagging against the door frame. “I got tired, like I do.”

“Oh. Oh, babe, I’m so sorry. I didn’t think. You’ve been so good this time.”

Daniel nods and I’m mystified, as if they’re speaking in some kind of code I don’t understand.

“Come on, sweetie, let me help you.”

“Want Rayn.”

“Rayn’s coming too.”

Daniel looks at me and he really does seem exhausted.

“Is everything alright?” I ask, anxiety eating at me.

“It’s fine. It’s my fault. He’s been so good this time, I forgot.”

“Forgot what?”

“When Daniel has a bad seizure he’s usually like this for a few days afterwards. Tired, weak, confused. He’s been so good this time, I forgot. I guess it’s just caught up with him. This was why we didn’t want him to stay with you tonight. He’s so unpredictable when something like this happens.”

“Will he be alright?”

Daniel suddenly looks spaced out, and it’s quite scary how fast things have changed.

“Oh yes, he’ll be fine. He needs to sleep for a while and he’ll be better when he wakes up, but we have to be careful. If he expends too much energy he’ll have these crashes.”

“Okay, I’ll be carefully. Come on, babe. I could do with a nap myself.”

I put my arm around Daniel and steer him toward his room. Daniel stumbles a little but follows obediently.

In the bedroom, Sara leaves me to get Daniel undressed and into bed. “I’m tired,” he says as
I sit him down and tug off his jeans.

“I know. You’ll be asleep in a few minutes. I just need to get your jeans off and you can lie down.”

“Okay. I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry for?”

“I want to stay awake and talk to you. I’m tired.”

“That’s okay. You’re not well. We can talk plenty when you’re feeling better.”

“Am I ill?”

“Not exactly. Have a little sleep and you’ll be fine.”

“Okay.”

As soon as Daniel lies down he snuggles on his side, with one hand under his cheek, and promptly falls asleep. I lie on the bed propped up on one elbow and watch him. He’s very beautiful, but it’s more than that. It’s knowing him. His physical beauty is only part of what makes up Daniel’s loveliness. I brush his hair out of his face, and he stirs and murmurs something softly. Whatever he says has my name in in it, and it makes me smile.

Daniel’s pretty out of it for the rest of the day, and by the time I get into bed he’s so deeply asleep we couldn’t have got up to anything if I’d wanted to. Nevertheless it’s impossible to explain how wonderful it is to fall asleep cuddled up to Daniel, and how much more wonderful it is to wake with him in my arms.

Somehow, we’ve managed to get into a position where Daniel is half on top of me with one leg hooked around mine and his arm thrown across my stomach. His head is on my chest and from the moment I surface to consciousness I’m full of the scent and feel of him. My sensed are overloaded.

Daniel stirs and murmurs and it seems so natural to stroke his hair. He promptly snuggles into me and goes still again. His sleepy little noises make me smile. He’s as cute as a kitten. I really don’t want to move but the call of nature finally forces me to. I try very hard to slide out from under Daniel without waking him but it’s impossible.

Daniel stirs and his eyes flutter open. When he sees me a sleepy smile breaks over his face and it brightens my day instantly.

“How are you feeling this morning?”

“Fuzzy but I’ll be okay. Have I drooled on your chest?”

No but it wouldn’t have mattered if you had. I love every little bit of you, even your drool.”

Daniel raises his head and looks into my eyes. “I told you, you loved me. Right from the beginning, I told you.”

“Yes, you did, You were absolutely right.”

“I’m always right.”

“No one’s always right but you come closer than anyone else I know.”

Daniel’s golden smile lights his face and my heart. “Do you mean that?”

“I don’t say what I don’t mean.”

Daniel snuggles down again and I ache to keep him in my arms, but a part of my anatomy is aching more and I can no longer deny it.

“I have to go to the bathroom. Don’t go away.”

Daniel giggles. “As if. Where am I going to go?”

“Oh I don’t know, climbing Everest? Sailing down the Nile? Surfboarding in Australia.”

“I’m good at surfing.”

“You are?”

“No, I just wanted to see the look on your face when I said it.”

“You’re funny. I love you so much.” After that, what can I do but kiss him? He puts his arms around my neck and relaxes on my chest. It’s the most beautiful kiss in the history of the world. I push him off gently, run to the bathroom then run back again to pick up where I left off. “Mmm. There’s nowhere in the world I’d rather be than here right now.”

“Nowhere?”

“Absolutely nowhere.”

****

We spend a kick –back day with Sara and Lily.

In the middle of the morning I get a call from the police. They’ve pulled Andy in and charged him with sexual assault and indecent assault. He’s been released on police bail with a condition not to come near me or contact me in any way. To be honest, I don’t know how I feel about that. I never really wanted Andy to get into trouble. I just want him to leave me alone.

Daniel is very lethargic and keeps falling asleep. As the day progresses, however, he gets more alert and awake and by tea time he’s nagging to come home with me again.

“I’m not sure, Daniel,” Sara says doubtfully.

“Well I am. You promised. You did, Sara.”

“I know, but you haven’t been well and—.”

“I’m better now. I’m not feeling sleepy at all.”

“I accept that but you still need to rest or you will get tired again. You know how these things go, Daniel. If you get too tired you’ll make yourself ill again.”

“I won’t get tired, Rayn will look after me and I promise that I won’t go too wild in bed.”

“Daniel, that’s inappropriate hun.”

“Sorry, I won’t talk about it anymore. That doesn’t mean I’m not going to do it though.”

“Daniel!” Lily and Sara chorused.

“So, can I go?”

“What do you think Rayn? Are you alright with Daniel spending the night with you. I don’t think anything bad is going to happen, not now.”

What do I think? Do they really have to ask? The thought of going to sleep in my own bed with Daniel at my side and waking up in the morning with him beside me is almost too wonderful to bear. And as for anything else…well I can’t even imagine it, let alone hope for it.

“Yes, of course I want Daniel to stay with me. There’s nothing I want more.”

“Will he be safe?” Sara asks, shocking me. Doesn’t she really think Daniel might not be safe with me? Then I realise with a jolt what she means. Andy. Well, I can fight him if I have to. I can fight anyone for Daniel.

“Yes,” I say with confidence. “Yes, he’ll be safe.”