Clown Wyrm - 4. Chapter 4 - River

The rest of the second day came and went without Mercury and Periwinkle seeing anyone else, but as the deep darkness began to settle over the dungeon with the setting of the sun, Norjia returned.

“You haven’t given us any food!” Mercury shouted as the brutal woman descended the stairs again.

Norjia did not reply, but she unlocked the cell door. “Out,” she ordered.

Mercury strode right past her in a fury, but Periwinkle hesitated. He was not interested in being too close to the warrior woman’s fists, and he tentatively slunk out of the cell.

Mercury noticed that Norjia was at least an inch or two taller than Periwinkle, who she had always thought of as very tall. Mercury also realized Norjia was gorgeous. The previous day, Norjia had been sweaty and disheveled from the brief brutal battle, but now she was in a fresh suit of armor, and her dreadlocks were beautifully styled on top of her head. Norjia’s dark skin glistened in the low light.

She turned and led the pair of clowns up to the first floor.

Three more knights were waiting. Each was a tall, imposing figure, and Mercury and Periwinkle were very intimidated by them.

One of them whispered, “Genetic abominations.”

“Have a seat,” another said.

It did not sound like a suggestion.

There were two chairs in the middle of the room, and the clowns sat. The knights surrounded the pair with Norjia in front of them.

“My sister informed us that you two are not from Armonia, and that you may have come here from the deep past by R’Kathlug’s magic.”

“Magic?” Mercury repeated. “But there’s no such thing as magic.”

Norjia was confused by Mercury’s words. “What are you talking about? Of course there is. Are you part of the dark one’s ancient horde?”

Mercury tried to explain. “We don’t know anything about magic or a horde. We’re just a couple of clowns; please, let us go and leave us alone!”

Norjia backhanded Mercury across the cheek and knocked her from the chair, causing her to cry out in shock and pain as she fell to the floor.

“What the fuck?!” Mercury shrieked, clutching her face and scooting against Periwinkle’s knees. “Why are you doing this to us?”

Norjia stepped up and loomed over Mercury. “We will destroy you if it turns out you’re part of the dark one’s minions.”

Tears filled Mercury’s eyes, and she again whimpered the words, “I don’t want to die.”

Periwinkle had remained silent in fear of Norjia’s violence, but he finally spoke. “We’re lost.” The four knights focused on him, and he tried to shrink beneath their gaze. “We’re from the twenty-first century, but your sister in the other cell told us this is the… seventy-seventh century, did I get that right?”

“Seventy-sixth,” one knight corrected, “the year is seventy-seven-thirty-four of the seventy-sixth century.”

“If you come from the deep past,” another stated, “then you must be from the ancient one’s horde!”

“We’re not!” Periwinkle pleaded. “We’re just trying to figure out how to get ourselves home! Where we’re from is so different than here, and we didn’t come to mess anything up. We don’t belong here, and we don’t even know how we got here.”

The four knights stepped back and whispered to each other, and the clowns heard them say words like king, Armonia, and prisoners, but they could not discern what was discussed.

A moment later, Norjia turned and stated, “We’re taking you to see the High Regent of Mysticism.”

“Who’s that?” Periwinkle asked in a cracking voice.

None of the knights responded to him, and three of them pulled on their helmets. Norjia was holding hers.

“And what happened to your sister?” Mercury added from where she crouched near Periwinkle’s legs.

Norjia glared down at her and growled, “Violatia is none of your concern. Bind their hands,” she ordered, but one of the other knights scoffed.

“These two fools? Look at them.”

Mercury and Periwinkle’s feelings went from fear and confusion to awkwardness, as the four knights scrutinized them with disdain.

“Their genetics are pathetic. Now, get up and walk.”

The clowns were escorted out into the light of the setting sun. It was no brighter than usual, but their extended time in the darkness made the fading light seem harsher than normal. They shielded their eyes as they were hurried farther down the rough forest path with Norjia leading the way and the other three knights urging the two prisoners on with the occasional smack to the back of their heads.

A break in the forest ahead revealed an arching bridge that spanned a wide and powerful river. Beyond it was a large manor.

Norjia stepped out from the tree line, and she began to cross the bridge. Her boots clomped with hollow, echoing thumps on the planks. Mercury and Periwinkle followed her with the other three knights behind them.

Low handrails extended along both sides of the bridge, and decorative patterns were carved into the panels beneath them. The wooden structure stretched up about three stories above the water at its highest point, before sloping back down again to the opposite bank of the river.

Mercury suddenly got a spark of inspiration, and she grabbed Periwinkle, yanking him sideways and pulling him over the bridge’s railing. The knights snatched for them, but one only managed to catch ahold of Periwinkle’s sleeve, which ripped off as the pair fell.

The clowns hit the water with a painful splash, and they submerged. Everything was muffled for a moment before their heads popped up into the air again, and they could hear the shouts of the knights fading as the powerful flow drew them downriver. Mercury and Periwinkle were lucky that their hands had not been bound again. They were both good swimmers, and they had no trouble staying above water, but the flow was so strong and the river so wide that when they decided they had been dragged far enough and wanted to head to the bank, they struggled to reach it. With significant effort, the pair of them swam to shore, flopping onto their backs on the grass, panting and trying to catch their breath. Mercury’s black and white and neon green wig, as well as Periwinkle’s high heels, were gone. They were grateful for the warm air, but the evening was getting dark.

“What the hell?” Mercury eventually said.

“Yeah,” Periwinkle agreed.

They lay on the side of the river, listening to its energetic flow and the birds in the trees above them.

Mercury sat upright. “Seriously, Periwinkle, what the hell happened to us?”

He sat up with her. “Is this really the future? Why does it feel like the past?”

Both of them looked a mess, with their makeup almost completely gone from the water, their clothes sodden and clinging to their frames, and their hair flat.

“It feels like the past,” Mercury replied, “but it’s also very much not like the past I remember learning about in school.”

A twig snapped, and the clowns spun around to see a man standing above them wearing absolutely nothing but a pair of shoes. He looked very surprised, but he was doing nothing to cover himself, as if his surprise was unrelated to his being naked. If he had not been so nude, the two clowns would have found him to be quite handsome, but they were very distracted. The man’s penis was at their eye-level. He was holding a bag in one hand and an unlit lantern in the other.

“Are you two alright?” he asked.

“Please don’t hurt us!” Periwinkle blurted out.

“Hurt you?” the naked man replied. “I’m a cobbler. I’m not going to hurt you. Can I help you up?”

“Are we near a village?” Mercury asked, doing her best not to look right at the man’s penis. “We’re lost.”

The cobbler became serious. “Are you gifts from the river spirit?”

Mercury and Periwinkle glanced at each other.

“No,” she replied hesitantly, “we don’t know anything about a river spirit. We just fell in upstream and struggled to reach the shore until we got here.”

The cobbler gave them a curious look. “You’re an odd pair. Where are you two from?”

“We’ve already journeyed a long way from our home,” Mercury replied quickly. “Then we fell into the river, and it managed to drag us much farther than we expected. We don’t know where we are.”

“Well, the town where I live isn’t far away. Would you two like to join me? I’m heading home. There’s a path this way.” He pointed into the dark trees, and Mercury and Periwinkle decided following him was a good idea, even though he was naked.

“What’s your name?” Periwinkle asked, his voice cracking a little.

“I’m Dahb,” the cobbler replied, “and what about you two?”

“This is Mercury, and I’m Periwinkle.”

“Good to meet you both,” Dahb replied. “And here’s the trail.” He stepped out onto it.

Mercury and Periwinkle joined him, and he waved them forward.

Farther ahead, the two clowns could see a light, and Dahb informed them, “That’s Tingedale.”

The trio began to make their way toward the glow.

“What were you doing off the beaten path?” Mercury asked, still trying not to look at the naked man.

“Foraging,” Dahb replied. He opened his bag to reveal several types of mushrooms, some sort of twiggy green plant matter the two clowns did not recognize, and a separate compartment for berries to keep them from getting squished. There was also a folded pair of shorts and a shirt in the bag.

In less than five minutes, the trio had reached the edge of a secluded town, tucked away in the trees. Rows of cottages made up the cozy little village.

“Welcome to Tingedale,” Dahb said to the new arrivals, “home to over five-hundred residents. Let’s start by finding you some dry clothes.”

Mercury and Periwinkle liked that idea very much. They were also hopeful that Dahb would dress himself. The trio passed several other townsfolk who said hello, but none of them were nude, and yet they did not seem surprised by Dahb’s nudity. Each of them was attractive and tall.

“My shop is just this way,” he informed the clowns, and around a corner, they arrived.

Mercury and Periwinkle were not particularly fond of the plain clothes Dahb provided for them, but they appreciated that what they were wearing was clean and dry.

“Now, let me measure your feet and get you each some proper shoes,” he insisted.

The handmade footgear Dahb gave them was nothing like Mercury or Periwinkle had ever worn before. The shoes were not necessarily customed to either of the clowns’ feet, but they fit perfectly. Dressed in the clothes Dahb had provided, the new arrivals looked like they belonged in Tingedale.

“And how about some dinner?” he offered.

By their best estimate, Mercury and Periwinkle assumed it was getting close to forty-eight long hours since their meal of late-night hotdogs.

“We’d love that!” she replied.

To their relief, Dahb pulled on his shorts and shirt, and the trio made their way into the darkening streets.