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    comicfan
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

The Prompt You Say! - 4. Prompt 112 - Alcohol's Victim

Taken from prompt 112 - The Haiku is a Japanese poetry form. In English we usually use a 5, 7, 5 syllable line. The Haiku usually focuses on some aspect of nature and ends with a surprise. With that in mind try writing at least one of your own. Modern American Haiku's have taken the poetry form and converted it keeping the syllable line but now taking the idea and using it to tell long stories in a series of Haiku. Take this opportunity to write at least one of your own.

The belt falls like rain

Upon tender bare skin till

Bruises fill in. Smack.

 

Blossoms of pain are

Erupting all over my

Body. Bloody hurtful.

 

Cries do not reach him

As the leather breaks the skin

And tears fall down. Help!

 

An innocent kid

Has lost his world to the shock

Of alcohol. Drip!

 

An easy target

For his pain and failures. Oh,

End it here. Black Out.

 

Tenderly set in

Bed to awaken never

To be the same. Why?

 

Because this was his

Answer to his problems. Belt

The child now. Cry.

So telling the story of an alcoholic who takes their rage out on a child. I tell the story over a series of haikus. Funny, the haiku always brings out the worst in me. However, having created the prompt I figured I should at least do this myself. So did I keep the form? Do you get the picture? I can't say you will like it but do you at least understand the victim? Did I do the job I set out to do? Curious as to what comments this might bring.
Copyright © 2012 comicfan; All Rights Reserved.
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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I definitely got the point of the character. Been there, done that, so it was a little too vivid. Excellently written Comic, and an eloquent series of haiku.

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On 02/22/2012 08:53 AM, Cia said:
I definitely got the point of the character. Been there, done that, so it was a little too vivid. Excellently written Comic, and an eloquent series of haiku.
Like anything else, it is easy to draw from when you have been there. Just glad the story carried over through the haiku and you could understand it.
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On 02/22/2012 06:58 AM, JOeKEool said:
Yeah,that was dark!! Well done Wayne. I have to have a good cry now.
Sorry Joe. Didn't mean to make you cry, but nice to know my words got through. Each one was its own haiku but taken together they tell a tale. Just showing how versatile the haiku format can be. Sometimes you just have to think a little outside the box.
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