Morningstar: The Malaise - 11. Chapter 11 Dangerous Territory

Morningstar: The Malaise

Chapter 11

“Boy, you guys were quick. Come on in. It’s just Adelin and me here… I’ve sent everyone else home.” Tilly was doing her best to sound as if life was normal, and that she was fine, but Kellar wasn’t fooled. The girl was in bad shape, something her dull array verified. He noticed a trembling indicative of exhaustion going on, and was tempted to make the offer to look after her first. Ten minutes of healing energy might do her some good, but he refrained from suggesting it. He doubted she’d accept help when her sister was so ill.

Tobyn’s chest brushed against his back as he entered through the doorway behind him, and Keller’s body responded to the brief touch. He could feel the heat rise up his neck. Is this the way it would always be?

Moving forward, and pushing aside the rush of mixed emotions, he took the opportunity to compare the man’s colors to Tilly’s. Yesterday, when Kellar first laid eyes on him, it would have been a closer match, but today, the difference was startling. His now vibrant aura had steadily strengthened since his healing.

“Can I get you anything to… like help or…?” The lost expression on Tilly’s face took his attention away from the blond man. She shouldn’t even be standing, let alone playing hostess.

Kellar touched the agitated girl’s arm, cautiously sending a trickle of healing energy to see what would happen, and was rewarded when he saw almost instant calming. He watched her tense shoulders drop down into their natural position, and was pleased to see this aspect of his healing work on a shifter other than Tobyn. “No, but thanks, Tilly. There’s nothing we need at the moment. If you could just introduce me to Adelin, I’ll see where we’re at. Don’t worry, okay? I should be able to do something for her.”

“I feel so much better now that you guys are here.” She was becoming more relaxed, and maybe a little confused by it, if her fleeting frown was any indication. “Follow me. Her room is the one at the back of the house.”

Kellar tried to keep his expression blank after they walked into the bedroom, but the despair he felt at the first sight of Adelin’s colors had his mask slipping. What he saw shook him to his core, but he had to get a grip and stay focused. They were all staring at him. As bad as he thought her look-alike sister was, it was nothing compared to the girl attempting to stand. She managed, but the effort was supreme as she gripped the substantial bedpost. The healer part of him was drawn in to the point of uneasy, almost morbid fascination, while the human part of him wanted to cry for what he saw coursing through her frail body. Her blood was the culprit, and he immediately recognized the color that didn’t belong.

He’d witnessed cancer before, in animals, and a human who had been diagnosed by conventional medicine. The same basic color he’d seen those times, was taking over the scarlet red that pumped from Adelin’s weakened heart. This shade was the tiniest fraction different from the human’s, but he’d dealt with it before. It was neither yellow, nor green, but in that spectrum, similar to the seepage from an infected wound. It revolted him at the same time it angered him. This was the enemy.

There was only one plant in his memory banks containing an exact match, and it could be deadly in large amounts. He didn’t know its name, had yet to find it in one of his treasured texts, but from a previous treatment, he’d determined it had an extremely high level of toxicity. That in itself was problematic, but added to it was the fact he didn’t carry that particular one in his arsenal; it couldn’t be cured with any method he was familiar with. The plant’s potency only lasted for twelve hours at most after picking, and his experience with it was limited to one animal.

“Is anything wrong?” The weakly whispered question jolted him back to the here and now.

“What? Sorry, Adelin, what did you say?”

“I said thank you for coming.”

“Oh… guess I spaced out there. Ah, you’re welcome. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Do you need to examine her?” Tilly asked. “There’s a lot of bruising under her night gown if you want to check.” The girls exchanged frightened looks, and Kellar saw that, not surprisingly, his healing touch had worn off the older sister. He should have done a better job of hiding his shock.

Kellar glanced at Tobyn, who was standing at the door. He had no doubt the man felt his alarm, because what he saw scared him to death. “That’s okay. I can see them.” He felt a presence at his side and was immensely thankful for it. He knew, judging by his new patient’s perplexed look, he had to take the time to explain. “You should sit down, Adelin, and I’ll try to make sense as to how my healing works.”

Once she had gotten more comfortable, at least physically, he began. “Every living thing has an aura of sorts, and for some reason, since I first shifted, I’ve been able to see it whenever I want. The amount of different colors is astronomical, way more than I could ever see when I was strictly human, but they each indicate something. We all have our signature pattern, and that by itself, doesn’t tell me much. A change in the strength of those colors can signify weakening or exhaustion, but it’s the addition of colors and where they are that lets me know what’s wrong when someone is sick. I can always tell when one doesn’t belong. So, what that means is, I can see the colors that represent bruising, and I can also see the one that doesn’t belong. It’s in your blood, and in two of your lymph nodes.”

“It’s cancer, isn’t it?” It was more a statement than a question.

“I’m pretty sure it is, yes. A form of leukemia.”

“Okay, well that’s no surprise. How long do you think I have?” He kept his attention on the sick girl, and tried to ignore the soft sobs coming from her sister.

“Hey,” he said softly. “Don’t go there. No promises, but I’m not going to give up. I’ll be honest with you. I’ve only dealt with cancer in an animal… a fox who had large tumors, one of them pushing on the back of its eye.” He looked at Tobyn and shrugged. “Long story.”

“Did you fix him?” Adelin asked, her voice barely audible.

“It was a female who had three kits to look after, and yes… she ended up good as new, so let’s have faith, okay?” She nodded, and the sobs from Tilly ceased. “But we do have a problem.” Again he looked at Tobyn. “I need your help.”

“Anything.”

“I don’t have the right medicinal. I know what it is, but it’s not a plant I can stock. It has to be fresh.”

Tilly, sounding stronger, interrupted. “What do you need a plant for? I thought you did the healing?”

“He does, Till, but he needs the plant with the same color as the one that doesn’t belong so he can use it to fight the cancer. He combines his healing with it somehow, and sort of sends it where it needs to go. Right?” He had turned to Kellar with the question.

“Exactly. Thanks for explaining it.” He gave Tobyn a genuine look of gratitude. “Does that answer your question?”

“Yes, it does. I’m not well-versed by any means, but I’ve been doing some reading about radiation and chemotherapy and it kind of makes sense to me. I hope you didn’t think I wasn’t sure about this. I trust you completely… because there’s no doubt Tobyn does. We’ve heard about shifter healers for years in some of the legends passed down. It’s nice to know one really exists.” She gave Adelin a little nod of reassurance, and sought out her hand.

Kellar raised his eyebrows at her comment about Tobyn’s trust in him. Was there something behind it? He dismissed the thought immediately as he looked at the two sisters. “Thank you for that, and I’m glad you’re asking questions, but we really need to locate the plant right away. Is there a stand of willows around here? Not willow trees… willow bushes… the ones with light green, almost white leaves that curl up a bit?”

Tobyn answered enthusiastically. “Oh yeah, we have those in a few places. Is that the one you need?”

“Unfortunately, no. The one we’re looking for usually grows among those bushes, though. They like the same wet soil.”

“Well, okay then. Let’s go find these things.” He was already walking to the door, and Kellar understood he was literally vibrating with the need to do something.

“Should I come?”

“No, Tilly… I think it’s best for you to stay with your sister. And Adelin, don’t exert yourself in any way; and don’t try to drink or eat anything until we get you looked after, all right?”

“I couldn’t, even if I wanted to,” she said without humor. He watched her lay down before turning and following the eager blond man.

“So what do you think?” Tobyn asked as they hurried back for his truck.

“It’s pretty bad. I might be out of my league here. It sucks we can’t get proper medical help because we’re shifters.”

“Hey, you’re proper medical help, and I don’t think you’re out of your league. Maybe it’ll turn out you can’t heal her, but I have more faith in you than in any doctor. She sure looks bad, doesn’t she?”

“That’s because she’s very close to death, Tobyn. I’m fucking scared, to tell you the truth. I’ve never tackled anything like this before, and I almost lost that mother fox because I couldn’t get the dosage right. It’s a dangerous plant.”

“Kellar, I know we’re asking a lot, and it’s a hell of a lot of pressure, but no matter how it goes, you won’t have failed in anyone’s eyes. You’re trying, and that’s all we ask. The rest of the pack is already on death watch, and the girls know it. It’s not the first time we’ve had to watch someone slip away. Any chance now is worth taking, and no one will think poorly of you if it doesn’t work. I trust you, man.”

“Thank you. I know you mean it, and I couldn’t not try. I’m going to do my best, and you’re right… at this point we have nothing to lose. That girl doesn’t deserve this.” He took a few deep, calming breaths when they reached the truck. “Now, let’s see if we can find this needle in a haystack.” He didn’t say it, but they were fast running out of time.

The first place they went to had the right kind of willow, but there were none of the diminutive plants. The next stand of bushes produced the same empty result. They both expressed mounting disappointment with a few curses, but Tobyn wasn’t to be deterred. “There’s one more place in a bog I know of, and if it doesn’t pan out, there’s someone else who might have an idea where to look.”

Kellar could see the color from sixty feet away. “It’s down there. I’m sure of it.” They’d been trudging through swampy woods, and it had begun to look futile, but his flickered vision was never wrong. They reached the almost hidden plants at the same time, and Kellar examined them carefully. There were only three, but they were all healthy and in flower. The odor was a little off-putting, but that was often the way with the more toxic plants. It was their protection from hungry critters, and any that did chew on one, would likely fall ill soon after.

“Should we grab all three?”

“No, that would be a mistake. Normally, I’d only pick one of a plant that loses its potency after only half a day, but I don’t know how much it’ll take. We’ll pick these two, and leave the last one in case we need it later. You’ll remember exactly where it is if you have to come for it alone, right?”

Tobyn frowned, and then nodded. “Why would I have to come alone?”

“Because once I start, I won’t be able to leave her.”

“Oh, right. Got it.”

More than an hour had passed by the time they were back at Tilly’s door. He could feel her rising panic as she ushered them in, relating that Adelin was having trouble breathing. Kellar was aware they had little time, but even he hadn’t been prepared for how rapidly her aura had faded since they’d left.

“I need to prepare the tea right away. I know what part of the plant to use, but I’m not sure of the amount, so I’m going to make it weak to start… roughly a half dose,” he explained, trying his best to stay calm.. “Tilly, you have to watch me closely, in case you have to prepare more of it.”

The electric kettle was quick and Kellar divided one plant into two equal chopped-up portions, going on both gut instinct and his little experience. A fox is a far cry from a full grown shifter with different physiology. Using one of them, he steeped it, separating the liquid before making a paste-like clump of the fibrous leftovers.

“You need to use the other pile and do the exact same thing if I ask for it, and you may have to chop up the second plant into the same amounts,” he told the intently observant sister. She nodded that she understood the process. Tobyn had studied the preparations as well, watching it all from the end of the kitchen counter.

Kellar stuck the remaining plant into a glass of water, warning Tilly it was toxic and to dispose of it carefully if they didn’t use it. At the mention of the word ‘toxic,’ a hint of fear flashed over her face, but she rallied and nodded once more.

Back in the bedroom, he coaxed a lethargic Adelin to accept the few sips of liquid before sliding the coarsely ground wad in against her cheek. He spoke clearly to her, explaining what he was doing and imparting on her the dangers of swallowing the plant. If he felt toxicity occurring, he would be able to remove the mass from her cheek easily, but if she swallowed it, he couldn’t control the dosage her body received, and that could prove disastrous. There’s no turning back now.

Within seconds after she’d accepted the tea, he was kneeling on the rug at the side of the bed with the palm of one hand pressed against her back and the other flat against her front, directly over her heart. In essence, the pump for her circulatory system was sandwiched between his two hands as she lay on her back. At his touch, Adelin slowly lost consciousness. The surge of heat that began generating immediately, surprised even him. It was the first time Kellar experienced so sudden a drain on his own body, and when he flickered, his colors had already paled enough he could detect the difference. This was going to be an ordeal.

What might have been a couple of hours later, Kellar surfaced from some place deep. Sweat was pouring from his entire body, while his patient was flushed, but only damp across her forehead. A check on her colors showed he wasn’t gaining ground as fast as he’d hoped, so he asked for the next pile to be prepared, vaguely sensing Tilly’s hurried exit. He paid no mind to what was going on around him. All his attention was centered on defeating this repulsive color. The only thing he never lost awareness of, was Tobyn’s constant presence in the corner behind him.

Tilly’s return with the next portion forced him to break concentration enough to evaluate. With a clear mind, he concluded Adelin could handle the full amount, and proceeded to drip it slowly into her open mouth. Although she was somewhat out of it, Kellar’s coaxing got her to swallow until it was all taken in. Once satisfied she was handling the new dosage, he placed the new clump against her cheek and returned to his previous position, not paying heed to an enormous, full-body ache. His determination was a lot stronger than any temporary discomfort.

Kellar couldn’t begin to guess the amount of time passing, but he was aware he was starting to win the battle against the poisoned blood. Each time he flickered, the vile color had decreased. As drained as he was, he was still not prepared when his healing power shut down to a trickle. So fucking close, was all he could think. If he couldn’t continue, he would lose. His instincts told him this was a battle that had to be won now.

“Tobyn, I…please… I need you.” His voice didn’t sound like his own, and was not at all strong.

His plea resulted in a frightened looking Tobyn peering into his face. “What can I do? Kellar, are you all right?”

Tobyn’s touch on his arm confirmed Kellar’s desperate thought was correct. “I’m… my energy is running out. It’s not done yet. I need your help.”

“Whatever you want.”

“Put your hands over mine. Slide one underneath, between my hand and the mattress, and put the other on top. I need to borrow some strength. I’m almost there.” He managed a small smile as Tobyn did as asked. Kellar felt the steady return of warmth and his smile got bigger. “It’s working,” was all he said as he directed all this new energy to the battle to save Adelin. He’d just learned something else he could do as a healer. Somewhere in the distance, he heard Tilly’s sobbing while he absorbed a steady stream of strength from the man leaning into his side.

Someone was shaking him. It took him a couple of minutes to force himself from sleep, and when he did, he found his forehead was resting against the back of a strong blond-haired neck. They were both still kneeling at his patient’s bedside, leaning against one another. He jerked his head up and pain lanced through his entire body. “Tobyn. Tobyn!” He flickered and saw he was almost comatose with exhaustion, but though his aura was severely depleted, his vitals were good. He sighed in relief as he stroked the sandy hair. It was only then he realized Tilly was speaking.

“She’s breathing fine again. I took that mushy thing out of her mouth. I tried to wake you but I couldn’t. Is she okay? Is Adelin okay?”

He flickered, but he already knew. He remembered holding onto consciousness until all the offensive color had been obliterated. “Yes, she’s fine. Every bit of her cancer is gone. And you did right to remove the clump.” He heard a thump behind him, and forced rigid, locked muscles to work so he could detach himself and twist around. Tilly was sitting on the floor, holding her head in her hands, relieved tears dripping through her fingers. “Tilly, can you help me lay Tobyn down? I don’t want him to slide sideways and hurt himself.”

“Of course,” she said, smiling through those tears. Together, they got him laid out on the rug, and only then did Kellar collapse beside him, closing his eyes in contentment. He made sure they were touching along their entire sides so he could continue to give back some of what he’d taken. He only vaguely heard the profuse thanks from Tilly.

A while later he woke to see Tilly dozing on the bed alongside her sister. Somehow, Tobyn’s hand had found his, or vice-versa. Raising himself up, he flickered and checked Tobyn first, satisfied and relieved his colors were much stronger. Checking Adelin thoroughly, he was thrilled with how clear she was, in both her blood and lymph nodes. While her aura was weak, it was not dangerously low. She needed rest. They all did. Looking down at the blond man’s perfect features, he was overwhelmed with emotion. There was no denying just how much he loved this guy, and maybe it was the sharing of energy, but at that moment, he felt closer to him than ever. Sighing, he gave him a gentle shake and watched those beautiful, hazel eyes slowly open.

“You did it, didn’t you?” Tobyn sounded hoarse, but there was only certainty in his voice.

“We did it. But yeah, she’s cancer-free. I just checked. You’re pretty drained so be careful when you stand up.”

“No, you did it. Do you realize you were with her for almost seven hours before I joined you?”

“Wow, that long. No, I didn’t notice time or much else once I began.”

“It’s kind of scary, you know? It’s like you’re not even here, and you get really white even though you must be hot. You were sweating like crazy.”

“I must stink.”

“No, you don’t. You smell great.” Tobyn blushed before rising slowly to his feet. “We should get going. A bed will be a lot better than this floor.”

“I’m with you. My joints aren’t, though. Give me a hand?”

When Tobyn pulled him up, Kellar found himself in an embrace. “Thank you, Kellar, for doing this. You’re amazing. Losing Adelin would have been a huge blow to the whole pack, and now we have a miracle. There will be some very happy wolves when word gets out.”

To Kellar, the hug from this one man was all the thanks he needed, or wanted. “I’m a healer, remember? It’s who I am. No need to thank me. Now, can you carry me to the truck or do I have to walk?”

Tobyn laughed as they drew apart. “I’m pretty strong, but carrying lumberjack giants is something I can't do.”

They staggered through the door of the house in the trees, literally holding each other up. Upon entering the kitchen, Tobyn pulled open the fridge. “You need to eat something.”

“I’m too tired to eat,” Kellar mumbled as he collapsed into a classic Windsor high-backed chair. It was surprisingly roomy for a guy his size.

“Dude, you just went through hell… a marathon, and you are going to eat. I insist.”

“Oh you do, do you?”

“Yes, I do. I don’t know how you held on so long, but you definitely need refueling.” He pulled a Corning-ware dish out and placed it in the good-sized microwave before dropping in to one of the same chairs, knees touching Kellar’s. “I think we need showers too.”

“I thought you said I smell great.” Kellar enjoyed seeing the blond man blush again.

“Well, you do,” he insisted. “You were giving off this odor that reminded me of the woods on a winter day. It was different from your normal scent, and it filled the room. It was strange because you were dripping with sweat. You still smell like that.”

“Hmm. Must have something to do with the healing. Did Tilly notice it too?”

“No, I asked her, but she said she couldn’t detect anything. I think she must have a cold.”

Kellar filed that tidbit away. Tilly did not have any sign of a cold. “What smells so good?”

“Chicken casserole.”

“Okay, I guess I can force myself to eat some of it.”

“Good, because otherwise I’d have to spoon-feed you,” Tobyn said with a twinkle in his eyes.

Kellar guffawed. “Buddy, if you can’t carry a lumberjack, you’re not going to be able to force-feed him.”

Tobyn laughed. “Thank God I won’t have to try.”

They each managed to eat a little before helping each other up. Kellar had never been more tired in his life, and it took monumental effort just to make it to the bathroom to shower. He gave up when pulling his tee-shirt off became a challenge he couldn’t meet, and headed for the room designated as his.

Tobyn stopped him in the hall. “What are you doing?”

“I can’t lift my arms. I’m too tired… going to bed.”

The blond man, who seemed to shimmer before him, shook his head and herded him back inside. Kellar could see his exhaustion too, but in no time he’d undressed them both and got them in the roomy shower. “This will make us feel better. I know you’re tired but you need this.”

“So, I do stink after all.”

A chuckle met his remark. “No, I just meant it will help wash away the aches I know you’re feeling. I only knelt there about a third of the time you did, and I’m sore as hell. Now stop your complaining, mountain man.”

“So, now you’re the healer?”

“Yes, now shut up. There’s a new doctor in the house.”

Kellar smiled. He was more awake now as he felt strong hands quickly soaping him up. Tobyn avoided Kellar’s junk, but made short work of the rest of him. He thought he’d died and gone to heaven when the attentive man worked shampoo into his hair. A quick rinse and he was handed the soap. “You can take care of the rest,” Tobyn said, looking down at the big cock that had begun to fill with blood. Turning away, he soaped himself up as a slightly embarrassed Kellar did as he’d been told. Unfortunately, the sight of the manly, rounded ass in front of him finished the process, making it impossible for him to stop the blood flow; when they faced each other again, he was at full mast.

“Sorry for….” When he looked down, he saw his friend was in the same state. Looking back up, he was met with a sheepish grin.

“Happens to the best of us. Are you all done?”

“Um, yeah.” Kellar was having trouble keeping his eyes straight ahead. Fuck, the man was beautiful. Why couldn’t things be different? He found himself deflating mentally and physically. They were just friends, and he’d already accepted it. He was surprised when Tobyn dried his back, but it only made matters worse. He was so caring, it twisted Kellar’s over-worked heart. He had to get out of there. “I need my bed. See you in the morning.” Without a backward glance, he headed for his room, entering and closing the door behind him.

He wanted to scream in frustration, but instead, pulled the covers back and got into the remarkably cool bed. It had to be at least five in the morning and the temperature had dropped considerably. Closing his eyes, he attempted sleep. It wasn’t long before they opened again as his mind rebelled. Why was he in such a state over a man he’d only met yesterday… well, two days ago now? With his energy depleted, he should be passed out, but all he could think of was the guy mere feet away in another bed.

Love at first sight. Yeah, now he was a believer. He’d accomplished what he had set out to do… help his friend and heal Adelin, and the sooner he made his getaway, the better. Tilly really was a sweet girl, and Kellar could see why she was the one Tobyn had decided on.

Sleep wouldn’t come. What the hell was wrong with him? He felt like he was being clawed from the inside, and was about ready to give up, and go outside for a walk. A tap on the door startled him just as he put his feet on the floor. It was a testament to his exhaustion that he hadn’t heard footsteps. He didn’t say anything, and the door slowly opened, revealing a naked Tobyn standing there with a blanket around his shoulders. That was the great thing about wolf vision. Kellar could see the questioning look on Tobyn’s face.

“I can’t sleep. Are you going somewhere?”

“I can’t either. I was thinking about going for a walk… maybe even a run.”

“Are you crazy? You could hardly stand up in the shower. How about we just lay down… and maybe talk for a bit?”

“Talk about what?”

“Shit, I don’t know, Kellar. I’m all messed up, and I can tell something’s bothering you. Sorry, it’s a dumb idea. Go for a walk if you think it will help you. Good night.”

“Tobyn, wait.” The door opened again.

“Yeah?”

He studied the handsome face. “You know how I feel about you, don’t you?”

Tobyn looked down. “Yeah, I think so. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to make things….”

“Do you want to try sleeping in here?”

His head shot back up. “Yes. I don’t like being alone. Maybe last night spoiled me.” His little grin was adorable, and Kellar let go of his tightly-controlled fears.

“Climb in then.” He returned the grin. It might not be smart, but at least he’d have him close for one more night. The minute Tobyn’s body touched his, he felt a wave of sleepiness, and smiled at the yawn coming from his bed companion. “What should we talk about?”

“Anything you….”

Just like that, Tobyn was asleep, and within a minute he was burrowed into his side. Kellar felt a welcome sense of peace blanket him as he pulled perfection closer still. Burying his nose in the sandy hair, he let the scent take him to the land of dreams. The land where there was no reason for them to be apart.