Morningstar: The Malaise - 45. Chapter 45 The Awakening

Morningstar: The Malaise

Chapter 45

“Holy fuck,” Tobyn muttered as he stood up from the old piano bench, giving Kellar a hand to do the same. “My brain knows it has to be true, and maybe I’m just tired from the energy drain, but this… this… you could knock me over with a feather right now. How… why didn’t I know Miss Sybil had found her mate? I thought I knew everything about her. How come she never told me?” He turned and walked into the living room.

Kellar followed on shaky legs. He leaned on the doorway watching Tobyn pace. “I imagine it was something she found difficult to talk about with anyone. Babe?” Kellar uttered softly, getting Tobyn’s darting gaze to settle on him when he finally stood still. “She said it was something she preferred to keep to herself.”

“Yet, she told you.”

“Yes, she did, but only because she was making a point. I had so many of questions the first time I met her, and she helped me understand a lot of stuff. She saw right through my confusion about us, and went out of her way to help me. I was obligated to protect her privacy.”

“Oh, hell, sorry. I just realized how that sounded. I wasn’t accusing you of anything, and I’m not complaining. You were right to keep her confidence; I’m just so blown away, you know?”

“I know, and I get it. No apology is necessary.”

Tobyn sighed. “Thank you. The pain she must have gone through in thinking her mate had died… man oh man. I’ve always considered her to be brave, but I had no idea….”

Kellar stayed quiet, remembering back to the pained and wistful look he’d glimpsed during that part of their conversation. Yeah, brave was an apt word for Miss Sybil.

It took a few moments before Tobyn’s expression cleared. “Never a dull moment, huh?”

“Isn’t that the truth? I’m still trying to wrap my head around this too. Speaking of being knocked over by a feather, I need to sit on the couch before I do fall over.”

“Oh, sorry, doc. Yeah, me too.”

Kellar was thankful for his mate’s assistance. His legs had felt like water when he'd first stood, and he was relieved to plunk down on Bill’s… no, Arthur’s couch. He could see the sleeping man through the wide doorway of the bedroom from where he sat, and wondered again at what had happened to cause Arthur so much damage.

A multitude of questions rolled through his mind. Would Sybil’s mate regain the ability to speak? Would he remember all those years ago? Was his repetition of a fraction of his mate’s name a fragment, or a full-on memory he held close? As those questions crowded in on him, he thought about the actual healing of the elderly man. This time it had again been different. Evolving, it was less focused on one area, more encompassing, and requiring little direction from him by the time he’d finished. The process had become intuitive, if he could define it by one word.

Tobyn slumped down beside him, taking his hand, and Kellar stopped thinking. Contact, without the drain of healing, was all he needed, and his eyes soon closed. He never would have gotten through this taxing ordeal without his mate. They made one hell of a team in every way.

When he woke, they were both laying down, crammed together with Tobyn’s head on his chest. He was a pillow once more. He smiled into tousled blond hair before he turned his head sideways to check his patient.

Arthur hadn’t moved, but his colors were still aligned in the same stable pattern, and the vitality of his reborn aura was decidedly better. His shifter color was not as thick as the other strands, but Kellar figured it was enough, for the simple fact the burnt umber had reconnected. It should strengthen on its own, but maybe after a day’s rest, he could add to it. There was no rush because it was highly unlikely he’d be able to shift in the near future. It could take months before the man was capable.

He still couldn’t get over the amount of energy it had taken to draw from copper, but it had been well worth it to give a precious lady back her mate. In what sort of condition remained to be seen, but he was reasonably optimistic. At any rate, he couldn’t have done any more than he had. They had to remember to take their chains back, he mused.

He closed his eyes again, but Tobyn chose that moment to stir and lift his head from its resting place. “Feeling better?”

Kellar thought about it, and flickered to view both their colors. “Much. Your colors look better too. How long did we sleep for?”

“Bill’s clock says it’s ten-thirty, so, maybe an hour, an hour and a half.”

“Arthur’s clock.”

“Arthur’s? Oh, right. Still getting used to thinking of him as this new person.”

“Same here. Miss Sybil said hunters got her mate, and she felt it when he was gone. I thought Bill was in a car accident, but now I can see Arthur had his head bashed in. It makes sense with the injury on the side of his skull and not on the front. I know cars weren’t as safe back then but the injury was so specific. So was the injury to his knee.”

“What are we talking about, doc? Remember, I just woke up and I don’t have your big brain.”

Kellar chuckled. “That, for some reason, this man survived a hunter attack all those years ago. It destroyed his pattern, but he didn’t die. I’m just processing that… and don’t sell yourself short. Your brain is plenty big… maybe not as big as your dick, but…,” he trailed off with a grin.

“Hey, was that an insult or a compliment?” Tobyn's hand moved closer to Kellar's nipple, ready to punish. “Maybe he was left for dead?”

Kellar grinned as his hand covered his mate's. “Always a compliment, babe, so don't hurt me. And yeah, that makes sense. Or maybe the hunters were interrupted. The poor man… all this time.”

“Poor Miss Sybil. So, were they joined? How much did she tell you?”

“Only that they met at a conclave; the last one, where a number of shifters disappeared over the weeks following. I never even thought to ask about her mate's pack back then. To be honest, I had only you on my mind at the time, and it was a struggle to think of much else.”

“I remember that day, doc. I was in the same boat, and I had no clue what was happening to me. I’m just glad we finally figured it out because those emotions were tough.”

“Me too. You were definitely worth the wait. Anyway, back to Miss Sybil; she was seventeen, and they shared a few kisses. Arthur was to meet her at Morningstar after he helped his pack bring their harvest in… hay, if I remember right… but, he never made it.”

“Wow,” Tobyn uttered. “I never knew any of that. So, they never joined then.”

“I think they started it just like we did… with kissing, because she ‘felt’ the moment he supposedly died. Imagine when she finds out it was his pattern that died… disrupted beyond recognition.”

“Did you know that was possible?”

Kellar joined Tobyn in sitting, pulling his knees up to his chest. “I had no idea, but it doesn’t surprise me. The connection we mates share… it’s tied to our colors. You only need to see them interact to know that. You saw it twice now, so you know.”

Tobyn nodded. “It is pretty obvious when you see them do that joining dance. Remember when Miss Sybil had that nudge where she felt joy. She thought it was our joy, and I was curious about what it could be, but now I think it was hers she was feeling. She was getting a nudge from her future.”

“I’m glad you mentioned that, babe. I’ve been worried about what state Arthur will end up in, but if she felt great joy over this, then it must be good.”

Kellar smiled, and Tobyn matched it with one of his own. “Do you think she could feel him come back to ‘life’ when his pattern was repaired?”

“I wouldn’t expect so, not after all these years, but I guess we’ll find out. The reason she felt his ‘death’ could have had to do with her being a seer, and she was stronger back then. All I know is she is going to be so happy when she does find out.”

“That amazing woman has been alone for all these years—I’d always wondered about that—and now I understand why.”

“She’s been grieving in silence for a lifetime.” Kellar pulled Tobyn against him, leaning his head against the side of his mate’s. “You know what I’d like?” he asked in a low murmur.

“I think I can guess. Does it involve getting naked?” Tobyn squirmed as Kellar blew air into his ear.

“That’s always a good option,” he whispered. “I wouldn’t mind eating naked.”

Tobyn pulled his head back so he could look at Kellar. His eyes twinkled. “Oh. I see. It’s food you want?”

Kellar grinned. “Well, I am hungry. I guess it’s kind of late, though, and that meeting could still be going on. Wanna fool around while Arthur sleeps?”

Tobyn chuckled. “First of all, we are not doing anything here, so forget that.” He chuckled again at Kellar’s over-the-top pout. “Besides, you still need rest and food. So, I am going to go to our place and get the food Delia sent over for you. She said it would be in the fridge. Got it?”

“Yes, dear.”

The food was satisfyingly good, although Tobyn pointed out with amusement that it was being devoured a little too quickly on Kellar’s part for him to actually taste it. Kellar nodded and smirked, but didn’t slow down. He was as famished as he’d ever been.

After checking on Arthur and reclaiming their chains, they returned to the couch. Exhaustion reared its head again, and once they were settled with Tobyn’s head back in its favored position, they succumbed to sleep. Just like with Logan, Kellar woke regularly to flicker on Arthur’s colors. As soon as he was satisfied with what he saw, he went right back to sleep. In no time at all it seemed, sun was lightening the room, and Kellar, opening his eyes at the sounds of movements from outside, felt rested enough to get up and face the new day. His timing was perfect, for his patient, surprisingly, was in the process of swinging his legs off the bed and onto the floor.

“Up… bathroom… breakfast… garden,” the man muttered. Kellar heard him clearly just before astonished eyes met his. The man’s mouth opened and closed. A garbled sound preceded “… words back.”

“Yes, they are,” Kellar responded, rising quickly and startling Tobyn awake in the process. “How do you feel, Arthur?”

“Arthur?” He stared blankly for a few seconds, before recognition dawned. “Arthur… Arthur… yes, yes… Arthur… legs don’t hurt… I’m Arthur.”

Kellar advanced slowly into the bedroom, shocked at how quickly the elderly shifter had come out of the healing. It was the last thing he’d expected. He heard his mate rising too, but he kept his focus on Arthur. “I’m a healer. My name is….”

“Cahlar.” He pronounced it the way Delia had when talking about the subject of the painting. This man has been listening. “Healed me… my words… speak outside my head again?”

“Ah, yes… you could speak inside your head?”

Arthur was rubbing his knees with his hands. He looked up and stared blankly for a second. “Yes. Not… like this.” His voice had the raspy sound of an elderly person.

“What do you mean, Arthur?”

The man returned his stare, and he could see the concentration. “Couldn’t hold many thoughts. Different now. Have to get ready.” Kellar worried the man was being bombarded by too much brain activity, but Arthur rose, and he witnessed his first smile. “Pain gone. You’re a good healer.” Obviously, the man was able to handle what was happening in the moment.

“Arthur. I know you don’t like to miss work, but you can’t go today, do you understand?”

Kellar watched a frown form. “I have to go. My garden.”

“No, you don’t. Please listen. You know how you can speak outside your head now?”

The man gave an almost imperceptible nod, but he took a step toward his bathroom. So did Kellar, ready to grab him if he lost his balance. Kellar glanced at a rapt Tobyn, who stood in the doorway. He looked ready to jump in if needed, but continued to stay quiet.

“Stop for a minute, Arthur. You can do that because I fixed your brain… you had an injury. But, now your brain needs rest. If you fall, you could do damage, and lose your thoughts again.” Kellar knew he was likely exaggerating some, but he needed to get through to his patient.

“Not speak?”

“Yes… exactly… not speak.”

“Okay.” Kellar was relieved when Arthur sat back down. “Just for today, yes?” His voice had gotten stronger, and there was a deeper timbre to it. His tone and resolute expression told Kellar the limited concession brooked no argument. Kellar grinned over at his mate. It was incredibly rewarding to watch the man come alive right in front of them.

“Fair enough.” Kellar approached the bed and assisted Arthur in laying down. “Let me know if you need to go to the bathroom. You can’t do that on your own… do you understand?”

He again nodded, this time more noticeably. He was indeed a complacent and cooperative man.

“Arthur, why did you say Bill all the time? It was the only word you said.”

A look of consternation appeared on the old man’s face, but it was fleeting, and when it cleared, he said what Kellar hoped he would. “No, no… not Bill. Sybil.”

“Who’s Sybil?” he asked softly.

“She’s… she’s someone. She’s pretty, and she has a ponytail. I like her.” The man was frowning again. Maybe a change of subject was in order.

“Do you remember what happened to you?”

“Pardon me?”

Kellar smiled. He hadn’t heard that phrase in ages. “You’ve been hurt badly at one time. Do you remember what happened?”

“Not… I have pictures when I sleep.”

“What kind of pictures? Dreams?” Kellar didn’t want to push too hard, and decided he needed to back off, when Arthur spoke again.

“Not dreams. No, not dreams. Dreams are good. Every night. There are faces… my friends… two bad men come… hunters waiting… after. My friends caught in traps.” Arthur stared past Kellar, his eyes full of turmoil. “Tried to free their wolves… but… can’t figure out how… big clubs slamming, slamming… all of us….” Arthur became visibly distraught. “In my sleep I see broken wolves… then I see red… only red. I couldn’t save them.”

Kellar looked at his sympathetic mate, the need to touch him strong. “You don’t have to say anymore, Arthur.”

“Sometimes in my sleep, I roll and roll… down, and it hurts… lying on a road… not safe, but I can’t move… can’t see… can’t see anything… can’t find my wolf. My wolf is gone. I can hear a truck stop, and I smell fear… back of truck. Days and nights in back of truck. Pain won’t stop, but safe with new friends. They will save me. I hear them tell me. Safe.”

“Sybil, the prettiest girl… she comes after… she comes in my dreams and holds my hand, and tells me two weeks… but she never comes. I can sleep when she holds my hand. I look for her when I’m awake, but she is only with me when I sleep.”

Kellar felt the back of his eyes burning, and welcomed the feel of Tobyn’s arm as it slid around his waist. It gave him instant strength to deal with the tragedy playing out with those few disjointed words from an old man. He could fill in the blanks, and they were terrible. Arthur must have come across his friends caught in silver traps and tried to free them, and got his brain bashed in for his efforts. Thank God someone from Vega found him on that road.

In essence, though he'd somehow escaped and survived, his life had been stolen from him. He was as much a victim as his friends were. He remembered Sybil, but didn’t know she was his mate? He didn’t want to ask for any clarification. Not right now.

Kellar became dimly aware of more activity outside, and assumed it was people heading for breakfast. There was a knock on the front door before he heard it open.

“Hello,” Delia called out.

Arthur’s face broke out into a smile of recognition as she appeared in the bedroom doorway. “Delia.”

“Oh my. Bill! You’ve never said my name before.” Tears glistened immediately in her eyes as she strode to Kellar holding out her arms. “Thank you so much. I knew you would help him, but this… this is beyond anything I’d hoped for.” Turning next to Tobyn, she repeated her hug. “Thank you so much.”

“It was all my handsome mate, but you’re welcome.”

“Shush,” Delia scoffed. “Do you really think he could accomplish what he does without you?” She moved from Tobyn to the bed, perching herself on the edge and taking Arthur’s hand. “How are you, Bill?”

“I’m me, Delia. I’m Arthur,” the man said with a sparkle in his eyes. “I remember my name. I’m Arthur… uh… that’s all… can’t remember my other name.”

“Arthur? That’s a wonderful name… like the King Arthur of old.” She patted his hand and looked back at Kellar, beaming. “Do you remember anything else? What pack you came from?”

Arthur showed confusion at the question. “This is my pack, isn’t it? I came in a truck.”

Delia giggled. “Of course this is your pack. It doesn’t matter how you got here… we’re just glad you did.” She turned to Kellar again. “I peeked in late last night and you guys were all sleeping. Do you want to go get breakfast and have a break? I can stay with Bill… sorry… Arthur. We have so much to catch up on, don’t we, Arthur? I’ll have to get used to calling you by your name.”

Kellar felt Tobyn’s eyes on him. “Yeah, that would be great. Arthur, do you have to use the bathroom before we go?”

“Yes, Cahlar. And brush my teeth?”

“Sure.”

“I’ll help you, Arthur,” Tobyn said, and he and Delia shifted spots so he could offer his support. The elderly man rose slowly, but with noticeable ease, causing a shared grin between Delia and Kellar.

“That’s amazing,” Delia commented as she watched Arthur walk to the bathroom with Tobyn only lightly supporting him. “Such a remarkable difference from yesterday. It’s great that he remembers his real name.”

“That may have been because I prodded him a bit. I mentioned it first, so I wouldn’t be at all surprised if he begins to recall more.”

“You’re confusing me. You said his name first?”

“Yes, and it triggered his memory right away.”

“But you don’t know him.”

“No, but I know of him. I fixed his burnt umber, and his pattern re-established itself. Remember us talking about Miss Sybil, our seer?”

“Of course I do.”

“Well, she had a mate she thought had been killed by hunters; he was supposed to join her at Morningstar, but never did. That man was Arthur. She said she felt it when he died, but what she must have felt was the destruction of his signature pattern. That was about seventy-eight years ago.”

“That’s heartbreaking… and such a coincidence.” Delia raised her eyebrows at Kellar. “Just one more thing to add to the list. Does he remember her?”

“Some. He says she holds his hand when he sleeps. He has some bad memories that trigger nightmares. He says they’re not dreams, so he knows those memories are real. It sounds like Sybil shows up and the nightmares end. I don’t think it’s registered yet she’s real too. He says she’s only in his dreams, but it’s only a matter of time before he remembers more. That was one messed up brain. All those times he’s said Bill, he was really saying ‘Sybil.’ He just couldn’t form the whole word until this morning.”

“Oh my. How tragic for them both.”

“Yes, but they’ll have their happy ending.”

“So, will he be missing memories here and there?”

“Not of Vega, from what he’s said so far, and given his reaction to you. But he has only disjointed pictures in his head of the trauma he suffered before he arrived here, so a lot of his earlier memories could be sketchy, or missing. You know, I didn’t realize until I saw his colors matched Miss Sybil’s that he probably wasn’t from Vega. Hearing some of his memories confirmed it. I should have known from the uncertainty when I asked about how he got his injuries.”

“I never thought to mention he wasn’t originally from here. It’s something that never crosses my mind… nor anyone else’s I would imagine. He is our elder.”

“And I never thought to ask,” Kellar said with a shrug. “I hope once he’s reunited with his mate they will be able to figure out the location of his home pack. Maybe Miss Sybil has some idea, but she’s never mentioned it to Tobyn or me, so I doubt it. That could be our next stop if they do.”

“Reunited after all those years. I’d like to see that,” Delia said as she sat down on the edge of the mattress.

The door to the bathroom opened, and Arthur came through with a strange look on his face. “Delia, my wolf is back. I can feel him. He’s sleeping, but he’s there.”

Delia stood up and helped Arthur get back into bed. “That’s wonderful. Do you feel him stirring at all?”

“I just know he’s there. Where did he go all this time? I missed him. Is this part of my healing, Cahlar?”

Kellar decided the simplest answer was best. Let Arthur take some time before he gave him a full explanation. “Yes, it is. Your wolf is supposed to be there now, and he may not wake for a while yet. If he doesn’t, I will do some more healing, okay?”

“Okay. He’s not upset.”

Kellar found that an interesting remark. Was he remembering how his wolf felt at the time he vanished? “Are you finding your words easier now?”

“Yes. My thoughts stay in my head… they don’t go away. Thank… thank you.”

“Yes, thank you,” Delia echoed the man. “Why don’t you two head out? I’ll stay here with my dear friend and have breakfast brought over for him. No need to rush back. We’ll be fine, won’t we, Arthur?”

Arthur didn’t respond. His face had gone slack, and Kellar was immediately concerned. Was he having a stroke… some kind of regression? Kellar flickered, but could detect no difference in his color array.

“Arthur?” Delia kept repeating, but the old man appeared to not be present in the moment. Kellar reached forward to see if trickling would help, but hesitated when he saw, first eye movement, and then the man’s brow furrowing. He’s in there, and he’s concentrating on something.

He stood straight up again, and waited.

“Is he all right, doc?”

“I think he might be lost in memories. His colors are fine. Sorry, but I don’t want to leave him just yet.”

“No worries. I don’t either,” Tobyn assured him in a whisper.

“Kellar, should you do something?” Delia asked in an anxious tone.

“Not yet. We’ll give him time.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, Arthur’s eyes widened, although still slightly unfocused, and an expression of dismay appeared. “Sybil is my intended. She’s my mate!”

“Yes, Arthur, she is. Don’t worry she’s fine. We know her and….”

“I have to go see her.” Arthur swung his legs off the bed abruptly, and went to stand up.

The agitation of the man was clear so Kellar stepped forward, and with a hand on his shoulder, kept the man in place. “Arthur, please listen to me. You can’t be moving around. We’ll take you to her in a few days, I promise.”

It was if the man hadn’t heard him, and with surprising strength he fought to rise. “She’s waiting for me, I was to come to her. She wasn’t supposed to come to me. She’s waiting at her pack… Morningstar… and I have to go. I’ve let my earth mate down, and my wolf wants us to go.”

What happened next shocked the hell out of everyone. The old man shifted into a lean, big-headed black and silver wolf who bolted forward. Losing balance immediately because of his pajama bottoms, he slid across the floor and slammed into the edge of the doorway. Just as quickly, he shifted back, and the old man was left flat on the floor, looking dazed. Kellar felt ill. Why didn’t I trickle him to sleep? Maybe later he could be happy his patient could shift, but for now he was only worried about the damage the action may have caused.

With Delia and Tobyn’s help, after flickering to ensure there was no serious physical damage, they managed to get Arthur back in bed. The man was once again compliant, but would it last? He didn’t have long to wait for the answer, when the man attempted to rise again, the agitation having returned. Kellar had no choice. He wasn’t going to make the same mistake again. Quickly, he sent a burst of healing energy into Arthur, putting him into instant sleep.

“Whoa!” Tobyn exclaimed. “That was intense. What the heck happened?”

“My guess is he got slammed by his memories, and that jarred his wolf awake.” Kellar surveyed the man again, and the breath shuddered out of him. He hadn’t anticipated Arthur’s wolf would come forth so quickly.

“Is he okay… did he hurt himself?” Delia’s expression and her tears showed the quick episode had shaken her up terribly.

“He’s fine, Delia. He has some bruising on his ribs starting to form, but I can relieve that. There’s been no change to his brain, and I’m getting better at reading how a brain is functioning, so don’t worry, okay?”

“Okay, I trust you. Wow. His wolf is beautiful.”

“Yeah, I didn’t expect to see him so soon, but he is quite a specimen… and fast,” he said with a rueful chuckle.

Nerve-edged laughter erupted from the other two. “We should be celebrating his ability to shift again, and the fact you were able to give him that. You’ve proved again just how remarkable you are, doc. I know how much it took out of you.” Leaning in, Tobyn gave him a kiss and a hug. “How long will he be out for?”

“Ah… likely a couple of hours, but I can’t leave him now. I’m not taking any chances with Miss Sybil’s feisty mate. The guy is full of surprises.”

Tobyn chuckled. “I’m staying too, just in case we need to catch a determined wolf.”

“All right then. Change of plans. Full breakfasts for both of you?” Delia asked.

They both said yes. “I’ll just go get our toothbrushes and some fresh tee-shirts and be right back,” Tobyn added as he released Kellar and followed Delia.

“And I’ll stay here. I’m not letting this character out of my sight.” Kellar smiled, mostly to himself as the others went to the front door and out. He had done what he’d set out to do, and he wanted to howl he was so happy. Who would have thought he could access metals and use them in his healing… to bring back a long-dead wolf? Who would have thought he could give such a special lady her mate back after almost eighty years of separation? He eased himself down onto the floor beside the bed, his smile still in place. Peace washed over him as he accepted the grace healing always bestowed on him. Thank you, Earth Mother, for my mate, for my healing, and for all your other gifts.

A big thank you to Tim, Robin to my Batman. And thank you to all those who support my writing.