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Unrequited - 8. Chapter 8

 

I wake the next morning, to an empty bed. I reach over to his side and feel that it’s still a little warm. I get up quicky and pad to the kitchen. I find him there. His hair is wet, and he’s dressed for work. As much as I love him in jeans and a t-shirt, I’ve got a particular weakness for him in a suit. This one is dark blue. The jacket hangs open and the fabric is tailored to his body.

God, he wears it well.

“I’m making you a bagel,” he says, “You should have stayed in bed, I was going to bring it to you.”

I break into a smile. I catch myself quickly, as I feel the smile threaten to overtake my whole face and leave me standing here looking like a love-struck fool.

This is new for him, I tell myself again, don’t scare him off. Don’t get over-excited.

“How did you sleep?” He asks.

“Great. You?”

“I woke up a few times.” He says, “I guess, I just needed make sure it wasn’t a dream.”

I try to control my smile again. I’m pretty sure I fail spectacularly that time.

“I hope you don’t mind, I’m wearing a pair of your jocks.”

What? I think, as I stifle a laugh. He has a nerve. Though, I can’t deny, for some reason, I find the thought of him wearing my underwear incredibly sexy.

“Why?”

He smiles sheepishly, “I just had a feeling that I was going to need a bit of extra support today.”

That’s hot, too.

“Why’s that?” I tease.

“Well,” he says, with an apologetic grin, “the flashbacks started in the shower. They’re coming in thick and fast.”

“Is that a fact?” I ask, as if the matter is only of minor interest to me. “What are you flashing back to?”

He moves closer to me, handing me my cup of coffee. “It started with a flash of your back arching, and the sound you made when I breached you.”

Oooh, Jesus.

He edges closer to me, so that he’s right next to me. He’s so close. He takes a sip of his coffee. “The next one, was of the moment you bit down on the pillow.”

Oooff.

He leans in, so his face is close to my neck. I can feel his breath on my shoulder as he whispers, “My God, that was so hot. I nearly came when you did that. I clenched my teeth so hard, my jaw is aching today.”

I don’t stand a chance when it comes to West.

I never have.

I lean down and give him a light kiss on his scar. I do it without thinking. I take a quick breath as I do. Breathing him in. He smells like my shampoo, and he smells like something even better. He smells like West. To me, West has always smelled distinctly like something I can’t have, so now, my senses are a little confused.

“You okay?” He asks. I can see the question and the concern in his eyes. He runs his hand down my back, pausing for a second, before going lower, cupping my ass gently in his hand.

“I didn’t hurt you, did I?” His eyes are soft, and he looks a little uneasy.

“I’m fine.” I say, “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I can feel where you were. My ass definitely remembers that it took a beating, but I’m not hurt.”

“Oh, Jesus.” He groans, “these jocks aren’t doing enough.”

I look down.

He’s right about that.

“So,” I say, later that day, when I meet up with Sarah, Tyler and Guy, “that’s what’s been happening in my life.

All three of them sit there with wide, blinking eyes. Three pairs of eyes. Two brown pairs, one blue, just blinking at me. Mouths fall open slightly. Once or twice, I see one of them about to start talking. From the look on their faces, they want to start their sentence with the word, “But…?”

“Isn’t West the one who’s straight?” Whispers Guy, eventually.

Tyler pats his knee quickly and nods astutely. Sarah studies me closely. She’s trying to read me. She’s probably trying to ascertain whether or not I’m having a break from reality.

“So,” she says at last, “so, you and West are together now?”

“Hang on a sec.” Says Tyler, “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Sarah. We need full details first. Exactly what has happened? Exactly who did and said what? And, exactly who has done what to whom?”

I look around and, in each face, I only see caring. I see caring and hope. These are my friends, and they love me, but still, there’s no way I’m going to answer all Tyler’s questions. Especially not the last one. No way at all.

“I don’t know what we are.” I say to Sarah. “I’m really not sure. We act like friends most of the time and the rest of the time, we can’t keep our hands off each other.”

“How does it feel?” Asks Tyler.

I think for a moment and then try to describe how I’m feeling, “It’s heaven.” I say, though I’m instantly a little embarrassed by how adolescent that sounds. “It feels amazing when I’m with him. It’s everything I’ve ever wanted. It’s better than I dreamed. But when he leaves, I feel like I’m dying. I can’t work. I can hardly eat. All I can do is think about him. Even more than usual, and that’s saying something.”

“Normal.” Says Guy, with a great level of confidence.

Sarah, now a qualified psychologist and thus, the person in the group who is best qualified to be making this type of assessment, looks a little uncertain.

“I feel scared all the time.” I say softly. “I’m scared right now. I’m terrified I’ll get text, or a call or that he’ll be at my place later, to tell me that he’s come to his senses and that this isn’t what he wants.”

“Also, normal.” Says Guy, with just as much certainty as before.

I’m really starting to like Guy, by the way.

“Is this what it’s always like? God, it’s awful. How long does this go on for?” I ask.

“When it’s the right guy, the good parts stay, and the bad parts fade away, until all you have is an enduring state of bliss.” Guy says, looking at Tyler, giving him a little nudge with his knee. Tyler leans in and rests his head on Guy’s shoulder for a moment.

Everyone is quiet for a while. Tyler takes a deep breath before he speaks. “Well,” he says, “it looks like my gaydar had a pretty spectacular malfunction.”

Sarah looks down at her hands. She looks uncomfortable, but she doesn’t interrupt him.

“I, uh, I don’t know if I missed it on purpose, Andy. I don’t know if I did.” He looks at me bleakly. “If I did do it on purpose, I’m sorry. I’m very sorry.”

I’m not really sure what to say to that. I’ve been thinking about it a lot, since things started with West. I’ve wondered if things would have been different, if Tyler hadn’t dashed my hopes, all those years ago. I feel very conflicted. Part of me is angry, the rest of me understands. Could he really have known? Does anyone really have an infallible gaydar? Could I really expect him to have told me, if he did know, given I know how he felt about me at the time? Better than anyone, I know the pain of a love that’s unrequited. Better than anyone, I know what that pain does to a person. I think of how hard I was on Ashleigh. I wasn’t always able to keep it in. How many times did I tell West she was crazy and that she was bad news? In his defence, no matter what terrible state I was in, Tyler never, ever, said a bad word about West. Maybe, that was him, doing his best.

Sarah sighs audibly. “D’you know, sometimes I think I need more straight friends.”

Guy cackles at that. Tyler and I join in, too.

A few weeks later, I’m in bed with West. He seems to understand innately, that his dick is more of a special occasion type of a weapon. A lot of the time, we get each other off with our hands and our mouths. It feels amazing, but I can’t deny, it leaves me in a perpetual state of wanting more.

You’d think that finally getting my hands on him, would quell the shocking way that I lust after him. If anything, it’s only made it worse. Much worse. Case in point, tonight, I’ve already come. I just came pretty spectacularly, spraying into his hands, as he tried to catch it. And yet, before my heart rate has returned back to base, desire is winding its way through my body. Pinching and twisting. Squeezing me tight.

“Your turn.” I say, rolling him over onto his back.

Usually, I take my time, making sure that he’s beside himself before I touch his dick, but I’m so hot and bothered tonight that I can’t wait to get my hands on him. I lick him slowly, teasing and tasting, as he sighs and moans softly.

I push his legs open wide, bending his knees and pushing them back. I stroke his balls and his taint, until he’s wriggling and starting to writhe.

Ooh, I want more.

I want it so much.

“West.” I say softly, “Do you ever put anything up your ass?” It’s a little embarrassing to ask, and with any other guy, I’d test the waters by running my finger up and down his crack, but this is West. For one thing, I sincerely don’t want to freak him out, and for another, I know how he feels about consent. In truth, I’ve been struck time and time again, how good it feels when he explicitly asks, before taking what he wants. It feels good. It feels safe. Something about it is really insanely hot, too. Maybe, it’s those few seconds between the asking and the receiving, when you know without a doubt, exactly what you’re about to get.

He smiles quickly, raising his head slightly to look at me. “Sure.”

Jackpot.

My dick lurches wildly and starts swelling, the second he says it.

“What do you use?”

He holds up two fingers.

“Ashleigh’s?”

He snorts a little. “Sure. Ashleigh’s, but that was years ago. Years.” He eyes me up and down and if I’m not imagining things, he looks a little abashed. “Now, I just touch myself sometimes.”

“Show me.” I still have his dick in my hand. I stroke it up and down slowly to entice him. Inching my hand up and down his pole. Moving firmly and very, very slowly. He closes his eyes, pausing for a second and before raising his fingers to his mouth. Licking them carefully and reaching down between his legs.

Oooh, that’s sexy.

I’m so excited I feel myself grow hard so fast, I can feel the blood drain from my face. He grunts softly, as he wedges his fingers a little further inside.

“That’s hot,” I say, unable to censor myself, rubbing my face against his inner thigh, “Oh, God, that’s so hot.” My voice catches as I speak. My breathing is so shallow, it feels as though I might hyperventilate, if I’m not very careful.

As much as I’m enjoying the show, I want more of the action. I take his hand in mine, moving his fingers gently in and out for a while, before I say, “May I?”

His head is tilted back, his lids hooded and low. He doesn’t speak. He just nods lazily.

I lube up my fingers, noting with no surprise that I’m trembling. As much as I’ve lusted after his dick for my entire adult life. I’ve wanted his ass just as much. Now that I have it in my grasp, I’m so horny, I can hardly see straight. I sink one finger into him. Gasping when I feel the tight, hotness of him. I give him another finger, as soon as I think he’s used to one. He gasps and sucks his breath in through his teeth.

“Oooh, Andy. That feels different.”

I pull my fingers almost all the way out and send them back in. I send them deeper and deeper with each thrust, until they are buried inside him right to the knuckle.

“Fuck.” He gasps.

I can’t help flashing an evil grin. I saw what he did to himself. I saw the way he touched himself. That way is all well and good if what you’re after is the pleasant sensation of having something in your ass, but what I’m going to do to him now, is something quite different. I feel around gently, exploring his narrow passage until I find what I’m looking for. He starts shuddering instantly.

“Do you feel like you need to pee?” I ask, keeping the pressure and the tempo even.

“No!” He howls, “I feel like you’ve lit me on fire.”

He starts to thrash, rocking his hips and moaning like crazy. I lick his balls, noting in pleasure how tightly they’re pulled up to his body. I take one in my mouth and suck ever so gently. He arches and yells in pleasure. He yells louder, and longer when I turn my attention to the other one, too.

I keep working his ass. Slow and consistent. Completely relentless. His dick looks like it’s sprung a leak. It’s dripping like a faucet. Eventually, I can’t take it anymore. I lean down and lick him clean. I want more though. I have to have more, so I take him into my mouth. I take him all. I take him until my lips and my tongue tingle.

He bucks and arches for real now. His body bowing up off the mattress as he comes with such force that try as I might, I can’t swallow it all. I come up for breath, as I gulp him down, but as I do, he spurts again and again, onto his belly and chest. When he stills, I run my tongue up his body, tasting the salty, maleness of him, not letting a drop go to waste.

He shakes like a leaf as I do it. Quivering and moaning every time my tongue touches him. He looks up at me, unseeing. His eyes vacant and misted over. I lie down next to him. He turns toward me. Facing me. Curling his legs up towards him, as if his belly is aching. He closes his eyes lightly, until his breathing slows down. I study his face. I know every part of it. I know it so well. I know it better than any other face in the world, yet every time I’m close to him like this, a small part of me feels as though I’m seeing him for the very first time.

“I felt that everywhere.” He whispers when he opens his eyes, “Everywhere. I felt it all over my body.”

“I know.” I say softly.

He looks at me for a long time, holding eye contact. If it was anyone else, it would make me intensely uncomfortable. I’d want to look away. Because it’s him, I don’t want to look away. Even if I wanted to. I wouldn’t be able to. I feel like he’s pried part of me open. Even though he’s the one who just came stunningly undone, I feel open. Gaping. I’m suddenly painfully reminded of my painting, Heart. After all this time, I still feel as though I’m standing before him with my chest ripped open, and my whole heart in my hands.

He sighs and says dreamily, “Did you know that right before you get off, like, a second or two before you let go, your whole body breaks into gooseflesh?”

I smile and nod.

I did know that, Dumbass.

“I never knew that about you, Andy Montgomery.”

*

Copyright © 2021 Jesse_H_Reign; All Rights Reserved.

Thank you for reading. This is my first post on this site. I hope you enjoyed it. I'm a very new writer, so feedback is invaluable to me. 

If you enjoyed what you have read, please leave a reaction and/or comment for the author!

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Chapter Comments

He sighs and says dreamily, “Did you know that right before you get off, like, a second or two before you let go, your whole body breaks into gooseflesh?”

I smile and nod.

I did know that, Dumbass.

“I never knew that about you, Andy Montgomery.”

 

Sigh. I love them.

  • Love 2
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52 minutes ago, Mrsgnomie said:

He sighs and says dreamily, “Did you know that right before you get off, like, a second or two before you let go, your whole body breaks into gooseflesh?”

I smile and nod.

I did know that, Dumbass.

“I never knew that about you, Andy Montgomery.”

 

Sigh. I love them.

Me too 

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I liked the line about how he feels like he did when he made the painting, but something tells me now that he has West in his grasp, the pain must be less sharp. Hopefully their relationship will continue long enough for his fear to subside. 

  • Like 1
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