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    Krista
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The Best Year - 2. Chapter 2

“Ally answer your fucking phone,” I groaned throwing the sleeping bag over my head to drown out the noise and the light from the sun coming through the tent. It was already getting hot inside and a heavy dew had fallen overnight made everything feel damp.

“You answer your phone,” Ally hissed elbowing me in the side.

“Is that my phone?” I asked, lazily pulling the sleeping bag off my head.

“Yes, idiot,” she answered and I felt her sit up on the air mattress. “You’re probably in trouble.”

When she said that my eyes shot open despite my lingering hangover. Cussing I pushed myself off my stomach and fumbled around the disheveled mess that was our tent and searched for wherever my shorts had gotten to. I hadn’t planned on staying the entire night, but Ally had fed me a few too many beers and kissed me too many times. It didn’t take a lot of convincing for me to follow her inside her tent and kick the other two girls out of it for the night. Not that we had sex, I still had my boxer briefs on, but it was the closest we had ever come to it so far. I was too drunk to do her much good by the end of the night anyway.

The phone went to voicemail before I found my shorts. I was preparing to ignore it, knowing exactly who would be calling me this early in the morning on a Saturday. That and everyone else I knew that usually called me were still here, huddled into tents probably ready to kick my ass for waking them up so early. Then the music of my ringtone split the early morning silence again.

“Hello?” I answered trying to keep my voice down.

“Jackson!” Mom screamed on the other end. I grimaced and held the phone away from me. I could still hear every word she was saying. “You better get your ass straight home, you’re late for your first day of community outreach, and to think we even considered letting you off easy.”

“Mom,” I groaned hearing Allison giggling behind me. I glanced at her and held my finger up to my lips. “I’ll be home in a minute.”

“You’re damn right you will be,” Mom hissed, but then the rest of what she said was drowned out by Allison’s sudden high pitched swearing. I jumped expecting some sort of insect to be crawling up the side of the tent. Instead I saw that she had gotten into her purse and dug out a mirror. My mouth fell open when I saw the series of hickies on her neck and collarbone. I felt my face flush, not remembering doing any of those.

“I gotta go,” I said and hung up on Mom not knowing what she was saying about the scream I knew she had to overhear.

“Look what you did!” Ally squeaked pointing to her neck. Then she looked at me and I saw her face flush.

“What?” I asked and she turned the mirror to me, frowning. I had a number of marks from last night on my neck and chest as well, even one around my ---

“Nipple,” Ally whispered horror struck. “Why the hell would I do that to your nipple?”

“How drunk were we last night?” I asked, shaking my head.

“Pretty damn drunk, dude,” Toby said from outside our tent. “Is Ally okay, I think she woke up the neighborhood.”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Ally squeaked, still examining the damage from last night. “If I end up pregnant, I’ll cut your balls right off.”

“What do I get to cut off you?” I asked, rolling my eyes. “We didn’t have sex last night, I would have remembered that.”

“Do you remember anything, because I don’t,” Ally countered, dropping the mirror onto the mattress and pulling on her shirt.

“You didn’t have sex,” Lily said, “god knows I was in there through part of it. You fell asleep somewhere between a drunken marriage proposal and a fight about who had the better looking ass.”

Both of us turned away from one another when we heard everyone else laughing and the sound of cleaning up around the fire pit started. We wouldn’t be living this one down for a while, but I also knew I didn’t have time to waste, I half expected Mom to get in her car and speed down here to drag me back home after hearing Ally screaming. She knew where we were, everyone did apart from Allison’s father, which I couldn’t help smiling every time I thought about that. After last night though, I doubt Ally could convince him that she was spending the night with Lily and Heather after going on a shopping trip into the city.

“What nice friends I have,” Ally said as I pulled the plug on the air mattress. “To let me get up to this much trouble.”

“We tried to pry you off him,” Heather countered as I leaned forward and unzipped the tent. I stood and stepped out into the bright sunlight and winced when my bare feet came in contact with the wet grass.

“You were latched on pretty good,” Lily said, her eyes going wide when she saw the hickies. “Apparently.”

“Shut up,” I said rolling up my t-shirt and swatting at the two of them with it. They both jumped back and laughed as Allison followed me out of the tent brushing her hair and carrying her purse.

“Damn,” Derek said, taking a break from picking up the empty beer cans after he crushed them.

“How am I going to explain this?” Allison asked, pointing to her chest. “I can’t go home for like a week!”

“Just cover them up with make-up and don’t wear a v-neck,” Heather countered stepping over a pile of beer cans and holding her arms out for Ally. Just then I realized how shaken up she was about what happened last night. As far as girls went around here, Ally was the one everyone thought was perfect, top of the class, never missed a day of school, went to church on Sundays. She had her father fooled, but she was still pretty angelic, maybe until we started dating. Usually these bonfires ended with the guys going to one tent and the girls to the other. Making out and kissing usually did happen, but never escalated. The flush of my face and my unwillingness to look anyone in the eye was the reason it hadn’t before last night. It was embarrassing to look at them and I didn’t embarrass easily - the floor burn on my ass was evidence of that.

“I’m sorry Ally,” I offered, reaching out my hand towards her. She smiled and reached for mine.

“I think we’re both to blame for this one,” she said shaking her head as I wrapped her into a hug ignoring the mess of her usually soft brown hair.

“Well I doubt I’ll be seeing any of you until I graduate college,” I said smiling as she broke the hug.

“We’ll have a memorial for you,” Derek said, “because if your mother doesn’t get you my father will.”

“Fuck,” I groaned knowing I had practice later in the evening with Coach Tate, Derek’s Dad after the outreach ended. “I better get on home, can y’all clean up?”

“Most of it is your mess,” Heather answered rolling her eyes. “You owe us.”

“Keep me honest,” I said and she smiled and waved her hand and I turned and jogged barefoot back to the car holding my shirt and shoes.

“Don’t touch any of them church girls with those sinner hands you got!” Toby yelled as I opened the door. I threw my shoes into the passenger seat and flipped him my middle finger. I smiled when I saw all three girls hit him at the same time before they all started cleaning up around the remnants of the bonfire.

When I got home I saw that Dad had already left for work. Mom didn’t work most weekends, unless a shipping order was large and she needed to oversee it. Her car was parked in the garage and when I closed my car door I saw the front door open and she glared at me from behind the glass screen door. I turned my back to her and walked around to the passenger door and opened it. I made a point to slide on my t-shirt before I turned back to her, but some of the hickies were too high on my neck to hide. I just hoped she was too distracted by her yelling to notice.

When I walked up the stairs onto the porch she opened the screen door and stepped aside for me to enter the house. When I turned back to her she held out her hand and I dug into my front pocket for my phone, knowing that is what she wanted.

“And your keys,” She ordered as her fingers closed around my phone.

“Mom,” I started, but she shot me a glare and I gently placed the keys to my car into her hands.

“You are grounded, no car, no driving, no weekend, and if it wasn’t for your scholarship there would be no swimming,” Mom whispered and I noted the change from the conversation earlier. She was deadly calm and I would rather she was her predictable screaming exasperated self. At least then I knew what I was in for. “I will take you to practice, I will pick you up from practice. Henry has agreed to pick you up to do your outreach at the park and to drop you off here when you are done.”

“That sounds like a lot of trouble, “ I countered as she crossed her arms.

“Go get a shower,” she said nodding her head towards the stairs. “Who were you with last night?”

“The guys at the bonfire,” I answered, feeling my face getting hot as I turned away from her to head towards the stairs.

“And which one of them screams like a girl?” Mom asked and for a moment I wanted to smile and say one of their names, but her expression stopped me.

“Fine there were girls there too,” I answered, “there always have been, you know.”

“No I did not know,” she countered and I feared for my phone when she threw her hands up into the air. “I don’t know anything about you, I stopped knowing after you turned thirteen, you decided you no longer needed me.”

“Mom,” I started and she pointed to the stairs.

“You’re late,” she sighed and I saw the tear fall down her cheek before I turned and ran up the stairs.

Seeing Mom cry sobered me up the rest of the way. It made me feel at least a little bit bad when I examined myself in the bathroom mirror. I overlooked my bed hair, that would be solved by the shower, it was too short to really ever be messed up anyway. The hickies and the scratch that curved around my left shoulder caused me to wince. We very well could have had sex last night and it sucked that I wouldn’t have much of a memory for it, my first time. Not that the guys knew that about me, I had told an elaborate story to them about how I lost my virginity at swim camp. They half believed me, even when I told them it was with a college lifeguard. Or at least they believed me enough to congratulate me.

Sighing and rubbing a hand through my hair I stepped into the shower and turned the water on. The scratch from Ally’s fingernails burned a little, but they weren’t large scratches. I already knew I would be wearing the full suit for practice instead of just shorts like I usually did. At least until the marks from last night went away. I didn’t need a second lecture today, not from Coach about acting right and shaping up, I got enough of that from my parents.

After showering I walked to my room with a towel around my waist. I didn’t have any work clothes and I didn’t really know what to wear. I had never done anything like this, Dad was never a hands on type of person, not when it came to construction or building things. When I was younger he hired a company to build my treehouse. I didn’t mind though, it meant I got it quicker and that was what mattered to me. I never really understood Dad, always having his head stuck in a book trying to keep up with the ever changing medical field. I wouldn’t have gotten into sports if it wasn’t for Derek and Toby’s fathers both pushing me into football, but when Derek’s Dad decided to coach swimming outside of school for those interested, I joined. I had always liked swimming better than football or basketball. I liked the water.

“I’m ready,” I announced from the top of the stairs. I finally just pulled on a pair of old shorts, a t-shirt, and a pair of old sneakers. I heard Mom step out of the kitchen with a small lunch bag in her hand. It was the one she usually took to work when she went on a diet, usually around Christmas when Aunt Aundrea came to visit. Everyone was too fat to suit her, but she was always worse around Mom being her younger sister.

“I packed you some lunch,” Mom said, holding out the lunch bag for me. Then she pointed to the bottle of ice water on the counter. I quickly walked down the stairs and grabbed both and offered her a small smile. She turned away from me grabbing her purse off the counter and sliding it over her shoulder. “If you weren’t grounded you could have gotten your own lunch.”

“Everything in town is too fattening anyway,” I countered before I could stop myself. I heard her sigh as she opened the front door and held it open for me.

“It never stopped you before,” she said, glancing over her shoulder before descending down the stairs leading to the driveway. Instead of taking her car, which was still in the garage. She walked over to mine and opened the driver’s side. I jogged around the front of the car and slid in beside her as she adjusted the seat and mirrors. I doubted I would be getting my car back any time soon.

“I’m sorry about last night,” I said after closing my door and sliding on my seatbelt.

“Stop apologizing,” Mom countered, shaking her head, “when you don’t mean it Jack.”

“I do though,” I said sliding down into my seat a little.

“Did you at least wear protection?” Mom asked and I shot a quick glance at her before I stared down at my hands.

“We didn’t have sex,” I answered fumbling with the bottom of my old khaki shorts. The bottom hem kept folding under.

“Who are you dating?” She asked and I shrugged my shoulders preparing not to answer her. I didn’t want to tell her that I was dating the class angel Allison. Not after what happened last night, maybe she would have thought Ally would be a good influence on me, being the Principal’s daughter. Now I didn’t think she would see it that way at all.

“Allison Welker,” I finally answered when she hadn’t started the car.

“Really Jackson,” Mom hissed as she slammed the keys into the ignition and started the car. I winced at the rough way she pulled the gear shift into reverse. “Do you want trouble?”

“Don’t tell Ste… Mr. Welker,” I said looking over at her as she concentrated on backing out of the driveway onto the road. “He doesn’t know she comes to the bonfires.”

“Does Toby’s father?” Mom asked, eyeing me as she slid the car into drive and started towards town. The park was just outside town limits nestled along the river. I almost expected my friends to start their tubing trip down it at the park, just so they could see me working on the hopeless mess.

“Yeah I think so,” I answered and I saw her eyes narrow and her lips whiten as she pursed them together. She would be calling Toby’s dad when she got home. Not that it would matter, Toby’s father was cool. “We usually just hang out, this was just a goodbye to summer thing.”

“Were you drinking?” Mom asked, her eyes still squinted. I could tell she didn’t want to know, it made me want to tell the truth, I wanted her to know that I was out having fun. That I would never stop, sneaking out last night was worth all this trouble and I would have done it again. I probably will be before they forgave me enough to unground me.

“Not a whole lot,” I answered and she let out an exasperated sigh and nearly missed the stop sign on the edge of town.

“Why can’t you just focus on finishing out the school year?” Mom asked, shaking her head. “There is no reason for you to be acting the way that you are, we raised you better than this haven’t we?”

“It’s just fun, Mom,” I countered crossing my arms. “I’m not hurting anybody, I don’t know why ---”

“You’re eighteen years old Jackson, it is time to grow up,” she interrupted, flipping the turn signal on as she slowed down at the park’s entrance. I looked out the window to see there weren't a lot of cars parked out front and not a whole lot of people working.

“Can’t you just lay off a little?” I asked and didn’t look away when she stopped the car in the middle of the nearly empty parking lot and glared at me. “I’m making good grades, I’m accepted to college on a full swimming scholarship, what more do you want?”

“For you to accept some responsibility for your actions,” Mom answered, “maybe then I will let you do more.”

“Whatever,” I countered the anger getting the better of me, “I’m never going to be the kind of kid you wanted.”

“Jackson that’s not what I ---”

“See you later,” I interrupted, unhooking my seatbelt and opening the door. I ignored her as I grabbed my lunch and slammed the door behind me.

I refused to look back to see if she had waited around or left as I made my way to the sidewalk. At first everyone was too busy picking up trash to notice me. Looking around the neglected park, I saw all the work that needed to be done. None of the swing sets actually had working seats. The bars were rusted and one had a huge dent in the middle from a tree limb that had fallen on it. Most of the playground’s sand had been washed away in the last flood leaving a muddy pit under all the molded slides and jungle gyms. The grass hadn’t been cut for a couple of months or so and none of the benches or picnic tables were clean of graffiti and that’s all I could see from the sidewalk. I knew there was supposed to be two tennis courts, a baseball field, and a basketball court somewhere in the sprawling mess of weeds and garbage.

“Hi Jackson,” someone said from behind me. I hadn’t heard their approach and when I turned around I saw Henry Clarke standing beside me with a new roll of black plastic garbage bags. He was wearing boots, jeans, and a sweaty t-shirt. He also wore a pair of thick working gloves and had another pair in his back pocket.

“Sorry I’m late,” I grunted, shoving my hands in my pockets.

“We have a lot of work to do so you didn’t miss much,” he said smirking despite the fact that I had shown up an hour or so later than the rest of them. “Come along then.”

“What are we doing?” I asked, falling in step beside him.

“Garbage day,” he answered, handing me an empty trash bag from his roll. “Don’t you think it looks better already?”

“No,” I answered, looking around I saw they had already stacked more than two pickup trucks full of garbage bags.

“It will when we’re through,” he said, seeming to ignore my attitude. “You can start wherever you want to.”

“I don’t really feel like picking up trash,” I countered, “I didn’t bring any gloves or anything.”

“I have a pair,” he said, reaching back he grabbed his extra pair and held them out for me to take. I hesitated then sighed reaching out of my pocket to take them. “We won’t be picking up trash forever, but it is the only way to make it safer.”

“I guess,” I said and he offered me a smile.

“Well get to work, we have lunch at Noon,” he said, noticing the lunch bag on my shoulder. “You can put your lunch bag over there next to the coolers in the shade.”

“Thanks,” I said and he nodded and walked away to go pick up garbage beside his wife Cindy. I walked over to the shade tree and dropped my bag on the ground next to a large blue cooler then I turned and scanned the park again swearing under my breath for having to be here.

After a few minutes of staring out at everyone working, I finally sighed and slid on the gloves then I walked out from under the shade tree into the sun. It was always hot this time a year, summer would linger for two more months before the leaves started changing. Even though it was still about mid-morning, I already felt myself sweating as I made my way to a quiet looking corner without anyone working and started picking up trash. It was mostly fast food bags and pop cans hidden in the tall grass. My head still hurt from all the drinking and I still felt like I needed a couple more hours of sleep. Sleep that would have gotten me through practice, but now I dreaded seeing Coach Tate in a couple of hours sunburned and exhausted.

“What kind of fucking parent does this?” I hissed under my breath as I grabbed another McDonald’s bag and shoved it into my plastic bag.

“Jackson Forrest,” someone said from a few feet away. I stood wiping the sweat from my forehead with the back of my glove. “You finally make it?”

“Yeah,” I answered, turning away from the young looking guy ready to ignore him.

“You missed some,” he said smirking when I turned back to face him.

“What the fuck dude?” I asked looking around, “Where is there not trash in this shit hole.”

“At least I am here because I want to do something good,” he said and I dropped the bag I held.

“Then go pick up trash somewhere else,” I countered and he smiled and turned his back to me. I only noticed that he was about my age, that I should have recognized him or knew him. It wasn’t like there were a lot of people that still lived here and everyone knew everyone else. I couldn’t recall his name though, but he definitely didn’t go to the high school, I would have known him then.

“I heard my parents talking about you,” he said, “Cindy and Henry Clarke are my parents, I’m Luke.”

“I could care less,” I countered and he smiled again and for some reason that only pissed me off more.

“You might want to watch your language too,” he added, wiping the sweat from his forehead. His face was streaked with dirt and his light blond hair curled slightly at the nape of his neck and around his ears. He looked like he fixed it this morning, but the sweat and working had mostly messed that up.

“What makes you think I want to talk to you?” I asked, noticing that he fought to keep from smiling. His brown eyes didn’t really match the light color of his hair and only made them seem darker than they probably were.

“Look, it’s better if you’re not off by yourself hating all this work,” he answered bending down to pick up a plastic cup. “Makes the day shorter.”

“Showing up late does too,” I said and he did smile and I wanted to deck him.

“So does realizing you’re a volunteer and not a prisoner,” he added dropping the cup into his bag. It was half full and he didn’t wait around for me to answer as he kept working.

“I’m not though,” I argued picking up my own bag and walking to the next piece of trash I happened to see amongst all the other pieces I chose to ignore. I wanted to get some distance between the two of us, but when I bent down to get the empty can of soda I saw his hand reach out for it too.

“You’re here because Steve Welker suggested it to your parents,” Luke said as he grabbed the can and tossed it into his bag. “I figured you’d be giving swimming lessons.”

“How do you know so much about me?” I asked as I grabbed a plastic shopping bag and stuffed it inside my garbage bag.

“Your Mom and my Mom are best friends,” he answered smiling. “They talk after church and stuff, you come up often.”

“All bad I’d say,” I countered rolling my eyes. I heard him snicker as I reached for another piece of trash and jumped when his hand grabbed mine and pulled me towards him.

“Watch out!” He said when I went to jerk my hand from his. I looked down to see a coiled snake beside the paper bag I was about to grab hold of and took a step back. “Dad we got another one over here.”

“Is it venomous?” Henry yelled a few yards away. I looked over to see him walking towards us and when I turned to look back down I saw that Luke was looking around in the grass.

“Where the fuck did it go?” I hissed no longer seeing it.

“Watch your mouth,” he whispered, not glancing up at me as he scanned the grass himself, but he smiled, shaking his head.

“How’d it get away so fast?” I asked not wanting to move from the spot I was standing, the tall grass meant the snake could be hiding anywhere.

“I think it was black,” Luke said as Henry came up to stand beside him. He didn’t look a thing like his father.

“There it is,” Henry said pointing a few feet away from where we were standing. “It’s heading out, if you see it again just tell me and I’ll get it.”

“Alright,” Luke said and Henry offered me a small smile and started walking back towards the other side of the small playground area we were all working on.

“How many of those have you seen?” I asked, still watching the snake as it slithered towards the woods. Just beyond that was the river and I frowned knowing my friends would be tubing on it somewhere enjoying their Saturday.

“We’ve caught a couple,” he shrugged going back to work.

“What do you do with them?” I asked, stepping closer, but I looked closer than I was before grabbing for pieces of garbage.

“We take them to the river and release them,” he answered as he shoved another plastic cup into his bag. “The river takes them farther down before they get back on land.”

“I think this place just needs bulldozed down and left alone,” I said standing upright and stretching my arms above my head.

“Wasn’t in the budget,” Luke countered and although it annoyed me that he was so laid back, I couldn’t help noticing how nice of a smile he did have. How it seemed to come so easily. “If we get it looking nice again people will use it though, not like there’s anywhere else to go here.”

“Until the next flood,” I said and he shook his head.

“You’re too negative,” he countered, “it might not flood again.”

“Whatever,” I grunted, bending backwards slightly to stretch out my lower back. I would be stiff and sore for practice later.

“Lunch time!” Cindy yelled from across the playground.

“Where are you going after this?” Luke asked as I turned to walk back towards the shade tree.

“Swim practice,” I answered as he fell in step beside me.

“Oh right,” he said and for a moment I thought he sounded disappointed. “I was going to invite you to play volleyball with us at the church, we do it every Saturday if the weather is nice.”

“I never get a free Saturday,” I said as we joined everyone now gathering around the shade tree. Luke’s Mom Cindy was passing out bottles of water and sandwiches to the people as they arrived. I grabbed my lunch bag, not wanting to sit around all these people I only knew by recognizing their faces from football games or the fair. I didn’t really know them, they were probably members of the church; somewhere I didn’t go at all.

I was already a couple of yards away when I heard Henry announce to the crowd of people that it was time to say grace. I shook my head and kept walking towards the outside picnic shelter as Luke started praying and thanking everyone for showing up. When I sat down on the wobbly rotten picnic table, I glanced up after opening my lunch bag to see that his eyes were closed and his mouth was moving. I was too far away to really hear what he was saying, but when everyone started moving around again I pulled out the sandwich Mom packed me and turned my back on them ignoring the sound of laughter and hoped the rest of the day from hell went by quickly.

Copyright © 2017 Krista; All Rights Reserved.
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I hope we don't have too much more of d-bag Jackson. A self centered, bratty teenager gets old really quick.

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You continue to have the teen dialogue and speech down pat. Interesting new introductions. The line about not being the kid you wanted is a zinger, and will gut Mom for a while. Jack may come to regret having said that, I think. Great developmental chapter. Will enjoy seeing everyone evolve.

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I actually feel a little sorry for Jack. :o He is what he is because his parents made him that way. Hands-off except for "disappointment" when he doesn't fit their 'being the kid you wanted' mold. They obviously never had time for him (contracting a tree house - Jeez). The only time they interact with him is when they punish him. Naturally he's going to find another family, which is his group of friends. If he lived in the inner city, it would have been a gang.

 

Perhaps Luke will demonstrate something different for him to absorb. I'm guessing in more ways than one. ;)

 

Nicely written Krista!!

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I really like Luke. It's funny how he's trying Jack's patience! lol

 

And how on earth do they NOT know one another if their moms are best friends? :P

 

I do think Jack is a bit spoiled. He gets away with everything. It is sad he feels he'll never be the kid his parents wanted, but his folks are right with him taking responsibility for what he does. It is time for him to grow up a bit.

 

We'll see if Luke can help him with that! :D

 

Great chapter, Krista! :)

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I think Jackson will be learning a lot more than he thinks from this. Sure he will resist and act cocky, but it is an act. I don't think he really is that kid, and this punishment will show him who he could be.. And then there's Luke, so yay!

 

Well done chapter!

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Nicely done chapter. Jack is obviously used to "doing his own thing", and the concept of having some kind of enforced discipline is foreign. Plus, with the introduction of Luke, the laid-back one, Jack is gonna hafta deal with his "bad boy" self image. (And it's kinda fun that he's already noticing details about Luke's eyes/hair/general personality that show his interest--despite whatever protests he'd otherwise give about noticing him.)
Great job in moving the story along and building some tension between the characters, both parents and Luke, as well as showing his role with classmates. Really looking forward to the next chapter!

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On 01/23/2016 10:58 PM, Robert Rex said:

Nicely done chapter. Jack is obviously used to "doing his own thing", and the concept of having some kind of enforced discipline is foreign. Plus, with the introduction of Luke, the laid-back one, Jack is gonna hafta deal with his "bad boy" self image. (And it's kinda fun that he's already noticing details about Luke's eyes/hair/general personality that show his interest--despite whatever protests he'd otherwise give about noticing him.)

Great job in moving the story along and building some tension between the characters, both parents and Luke, as well as showing his role with classmates. Really looking forward to the next chapter!

Thanks for reading! I'm having fun writing these characters. I'm starting to get a bigger picture of where I want the story to go. Character interactions is 'why' I pick the characters that I do, if I can't really work out some good dramatic/comedic interactions I have a falling out with them. :P lol. Thanks for reading! :)

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On 01/23/2016 05:02 PM, Defiance19 said:

I think Jackson will be learning a lot more than he thinks from this. Sure he will resist and act cocky, but it is an act. I don't think he really is that kid, and this punishment will show him who he could be.. And then there's Luke, so yay!

 

Well done chapter!

His parents are hoping he learns something, so maybe he will. :) Or maybe he really is just that stubborn. lol. Luke is a sweetheart, but I hope to give him some edge of his own as well. Thanks for reading and reviewing. :)

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On 01/22/2016 03:55 PM, skinnydragon said:

I actually feel a little sorry for Jack. :o He is what he is because his parents made him that way. Hands-off except for "disappointment" when he doesn't fit their 'being the kid you wanted' mold. They obviously never had time for him (contracting a tree house - Jeez). The only time they interact with him is when they punish him. Naturally he's going to find another family, which is his group of friends. If he lived in the inner city, it would have been a gang.

 

Perhaps Luke will demonstrate something different for him to absorb. I'm guessing in more ways than one. ;)

 

Nicely written Krista!!

Yeah, they were pretty hands off despite all the meanness Jack got up to in the past - so part of this is their fault. Maybe they finally saw where it may lead if they continue to allow him to get away with things... but! A change of that nature does rock a person a bit. :) I'm glad you brought that up - it isn't all Jack's fault. :D

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On 01/23/2016 02:03 PM, Lisa said:

I really like Luke. It's funny how he's trying Jack's patience! lol

 

And how on earth do they NOT know one another if their moms are best friends? :P

 

I do think Jack is a bit spoiled. He gets away with everything. It is sad he feels he'll never be the kid his parents wanted, but his folks are right with him taking responsibility for what he does. It is time for him to grow up a bit.

 

We'll see if Luke can help him with that! :D

 

Great chapter, Krista! :)

Yeah, the two are definitely measuring one another up, I just think at this point Luke has a ton more patience.. lol. Him not knowing Luke also just shows the level of... distance Jackson has put between himself and his parents, I think. Jack's Mom didn't even know there were usually drinking and girls at their bonfires, but she had to know there was a possibility. :) I hope to develop that relationship better.. the Son/Parents one with both characters as I move along.

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On 01/22/2016 12:49 PM, jaysalmn said:

I hope we don't have too much more of d-bag Jackson. A self centered, bratty teenager gets old really quick.

Hopefully there is more to him than that, there has to be some sort of redeeming quality, I agree. :)

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On 01/22/2016 02:00 PM, Parker Owens said:

You continue to have the teen dialogue and speech down pat. Interesting new introductions. The line about not being the kid you wanted is a zinger, and will gut Mom for a while. Jack may come to regret having said that, I think. Great developmental chapter. Will enjoy seeing everyone evolve.

It makes me happy that you like my dialog, I am very heavy with it in my writing. :D That fight was a big one and I would hate to have a child say that to me... I would think I failed them. So yeah, I would feel gutted. I hope you like Luke, needless to say he's important.. lol. :D

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Krista, I'm re-reading  this while I suffer here waiting for a new chapter.

But I must say “You didn’t have sex,” Lily said, “god knows I was in there through part of it. You fell asleep somewhere between a drunken marriage proposal and a fight about who had the better looking ass” is absolutely masterful.   

 

This is what I'm here for.   Well,  that and the next chapter.     

 

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On 11/25/2021 at 7:22 PM, Mattyboy said:

Krista, I'm re-reading  this while I suffer here waiting for a new chapter.

But I must say “You didn’t have sex,” Lily said, “god knows I was in there through part of it. You fell asleep somewhere between a drunken marriage proposal and a fight about who had the better looking ass” is absolutely masterful.   

 

This is what I'm here for.   Well,  that and the next chapter.     

 

Ahh, I can only imagine how that would look. Poor Lily, to be honest.. lol. I'm sorry about the delay, it will be a lengthy one as I'm kind of stuck where I'm at. Since you're in the process of rereading, maybe you could PM me and offer some advice? With everything that is going on in the world and what I've personally dealt with for the past few months, it is sometimes hard to write happier stories. 

Also, sorry I'm a bit of a downer.. lol. I'll try to behave. 

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