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Do You Ship Us? - 58. Is Love Enough?

The week disappeared between meeting with Daniel about their lawsuits and spending time getting to know more about Simon’s musical influence which included the guys getting together and playing Singstar Queen challenging each other until they determined that Simon had definitely spent way too many hours of his life learning all the tricks to perfect scores on every single song. Despite his voice being as good as the others’ Ryan had been pretty checked out of what everyone else was doing and couldn’t concentrate on the songs he was trying to sing so he scored the lowest, which only led to him feeling more stressed. In an attempt to cheer him up for forgetting the lyrics to some of the best known songs in music history, Jasper made a game out of singing the wrong words too, only he was almost perfectly hitting each note and it became more entertaining than anything, to sing the wrong words but try and get the highest score.

Ryan didn’t seem to care though, whenever he wasn’t working out at the gym, he was at home panicking to Jasper about whether or not he was going to be able to go ahead with the dance show and not wanting to let anyone down. It’d gotten to the point where even Jasper suggesting they do some practice choreography just to get his brain into the right zone, would make Ryan worry that he’d somehow use up his ability to dance as though it was something that he had only a certain supply of and it had to be savored for the right moment. Truth be told Jasper had not expected for Ryan to be quite as exhausting in his preparation for this show, he was trying to be calm and supportive but he was starting to feel as though he was dating a diva the way Ryan had become so obsessive over every little detail he could possibly obsess over while blocking out everything that didn’t have to do with his new venture. The only exception was of course Luke’s wedding, but only because it was the only event that wasn’t flexible that he had to plan around and he’d been tasked with teaching Luke how to dance so he would impress Fi when they got to do their first dance.

“Oh, hello.” Ryan finally seems to break out of his dance show trance when Jasper walks out into the hallway in a black perfectly fitted suit, his tie hanging loosely and his hair still messy and damp and hanging over his eyes. Jasper looks up at Ryan, taking his time looking him over, while he fiddles with the last few buttons on his shirt.

“Hello yourself.” He flirts, sweeping his hair out of his face and tightens his tie. ”Important question, are you going to re-wear that suit at some point while you’re away?” Jasper asks then shrugs. “Or like, ever again?”

“I was intending on wearing it yeah, why?” Ryan looks down at himself wondering what was wrong with what he was wearing, clear panic sweeping across him as he looks back at Jasper for reassurance.

“I’m jealous that other people are going to get to see you dressed like that.” Jasper sighs dreamily at him, his eyes scanning over his boyfriend again.

“I thought you weren’t the jealous type.” Ryan teases playfully.

“Ok I already didn’t want you to go, but now seeing you in that suit I don’t even want to leave the apartment for this wedding.” Jasper walks over and runs his hands from Ryan’s shoulders down to his hips, chewing his own lip as he strongly debates whether looking at Ryan dressed like this for hours was going to be torture or just serve as anticipation for when they got home.

“On the bright side, there’s bound to be plenty of photos taken tonight so you can enjoy looking at those when I’m away.” Ryan winks and places his hands on Jasper’s, needing to stop Jasper’s hands from tempting him even further, as they had started creeping along his waistline. “Speaking of which, you should finish getting ready or we’ll be late.” Ryan suggests.

“Fine.” Jasper whines as he steps back, walking backwards so he could keep his eyes on his boyfriend for as long as he could, not caring how thirsty he was being. Once he disappears out of view the two continue getting ready with only the anticipation of what they both knew the night would bring. It didn’t need saying that the last time they would see each other for the next few months, would be made special with the milestone that meant so much to Ryan and that Jasper had been eagerly hinting at for quite some time.

On the way to Luke and Fi’s elopement, Ryan and Jasper were focused on how long they would stay for before going home again. While Ryan had been distracted and not thinking much about the wedding himself, Jasper was completely uninterested in it to the point of being quietly against the whole idea of it. To him it seemed impulsive and stupid to get married so suddenly and despite having no right, he was annoyed that he and Ryan were thinking so much about their futures, and taking things so slowly yet Luke was marrying his crush after only just being able to be with her. He’d expressed those thoughts only to Ryan who defended Luke with a ‘well when you know it’s the person you want to be with, why wait?’ kind of argument that caused an uncomfortable silence between them as clearly neither of them were sure enough about their relationship to make that kind of leap of faith.

When they arrive at the location they’d been given, Jasper and Ryan were both incredibly confused, they were parked out the front of a modern looking house, a high white brick fence guarded the entrance but Simon’s car was parked in the drive way, leaving the gate open. The couple hold hands as they walk in to the house that was decorated beautifully with candles and flower petals scattered on the wooden polished floors. The only furniture was a table and two chairs set up beside two large vases of multi-coloured roses that were either side of the lace curtains hanging before a large window. The curtain was covered with golden string fairy lights that made the simple backdrop look gorgeous. Simon and Blake were in the kitchen area both holding champagne glasses.

“About time you guys got here!” Blake grins at them, raising his glass and beckoning them over.

“We aren't late.” Jasper checks his watch then lifts Ryan’s arm and checks his just to be sure.

“No for once you got somewhere on time.” Simon jokes and takes glasses over to Jasper and Ryan.

“Where is he groom, aren’t we meant to be getting him drunk too?” Jasper asks, taking the glass from Simon and having a sip straight away.

“I need help, the officiant has had to cancel and I am trying to work this out without stressing Fi and…”

“I’ll officiate.” Ryan offers with a casual shrug as though it was no big deal.

“You can’t just marry people, you have to be legally ordained.” Jasper nudges him.

“I am.” Ryan answers, looking at Jasper who had a questioning look on his face.

“Since when are you a certified marriage celebrant?” He scoffs.

“Since I left school not knowing what I wanted to do and thought it might be a career path I could follow. Although turns out people don’t generally want to hire young men to perform their weddings.” Ryan sighs.

Yeah no shit, imagine being the groom and having to stand beside you, wondering which one the bride is smiling at when she walks down the aisle. Talk about adding pressure to the big moment.” Blake pipes up.

“Which today will be me, so thanks Blake.” Luke rolls his eyes. “You sure you can legally do it?” He asks.

“You would have signed all the paperwork already and discussed the ceremony plan with the celebrant you had chosen, you just need someone to read the stuff and sign some forms and it’s done. I’ll print out the paperwork and sign it when we go home, then Jasper can get you both to sign it tomorrow and send it away. All done.” Ryan shrugs again.

“You’re a life saver. Thank you so much.” Luke lets out a sign of relief then walks away to finish getting ready.

So did you just want to get into the wedding industry in any way possible? Shirtless waiter at the hens night, perform the ceremony, be the reception entertainment? Did you dabble in photography too?” Jasper asks, a curious smile on his face.

“That shouldn’t surprise you, I love the romance of a wedding.” Ryan winks at Jasper as he takes his phone out to search his emails for his celebrant license. Jasper just nods and walks over to Blake who was pouring himself another glass of champagne. Jasper puts his empty glass beside Blake’s and asks him to refill it too.

“So now what are you more nervous about, Ryan proposing tonight or sex?” Blake asks quietly in a teasing tone as he pours a heavy glass of champagne for his friend.

“He’s not going to propose.” Jasper replies confidently but then his face falls and he turns to Blake in a panic. “Has he said something to you?!” He asks in an urgent whisper. Blake laughs and pushes Jasper’s glass back towards him.

“Well I mean, it’s a wedding and he’s big on romantic gestures. Wouldn’t surprise me if he got swept up in the moment. What would you say if he did ask though? I assume since you didn’t deny the other thing was happening tonight that things have gotten better between you two?” Blake lifts his glass and takes a sip.

“We are certainly not good enough to get engaged or even think about it. We’ve had a good week but that doesn’t mean I feel any more sure about our future. I’ve kinda been going along like things were normal for his sake more than mine, he needs to focus on this show and he wouldn’t be able to do that if he felt unstable.” Jasper sighs.

So you’re not sure about your future with him, but you’re still gonna sleep with him?” Blake teases again.

“You haven’t had to see him come back from the gym or working out in the lounge room shirtless every single day of the last week, or I guarantee you’d be considering it too. It’s not like my questioning our relationship has meant that I have stopped feeling the things I feel for him. We’re still in love, so it’s not like I’m taking advantage of him right? It’s just, we’ve waiting for a long time and it’s starting to feel like we’re losing the spark there, I really don’t know how people wait until they get married like I was originally planning to do. Sorry, no offence.”

“You’re not taking advantage of him, but maybe you should talk about how you know what you mean to each other now, and it is about being in love now, but you still have things you’re worried about and then if he’s not cool with it he can say it’s not time. And right? How do people do that, Beth’s been talking about it a fair bit lately and she is dropping hints then rejecting me or literally telling me she is ready and then saying she’s not ready and it seems like the whole shaming you out of it really messes with your head.” Blake sighs.

“Probably for her especially, since from what I know, they are kinda taught that to be a good little wife is to be pure and then to only do it when your partner wants and to make them happy. Their basically not allowed to consider their own needs or enjoy it for their own reasons.” Jasper shrugs.

“Are you serious?” Blake was mortified.

“Yeah man, she’s probably super ashamed to actually be wanting it in the first place. Even thinking about sex is ‘impure thoughts from the devil’ and literally God forbid you act on or even fantasize about acting on those ‘impure thoughts’. You’re going to have to be very patient and help her realise that’s all a load of crap and she’s allowed to want to do things, and allowed to enjoy the things she wants to do. She was basically raised to be ashamed of her body too, modesty is such a big thing so just the idea of you seeing her immodest body out of wedlock and doing impure things is a huge deal.” Jasper explains.

“Yeah that last part shouldn’t have been a turn on, but that sounds like such stuck up person dirty talk. Immodest body, impure things...”

“You lost the point didn’t you.” Jasper cuts him off. “And please for the love of all things that are good in the world do not use those words as dirty talk unless you want her to cover herself in 30 layers of clothing and cry in a confession box for the rest of her life.”

“Did you get taught the same things? Because you seem to be pretty ok with all that stuff, like does it mess with your head much?” Blake asks.

“Eh.” Jasper shrugs. “Pretty much going to hell from the moment I kissed Ryan so I think I just accepted that I’d already fucked up in the eyes of God and might as well give up the whole thing. I mean there’s probably things I could have repented but once you’ve sucked a dick I don’t think there’s much chance of forgiveness from above so why waste my time even thinking about trying.” Jasper answers bluntly, making Blake choke on a mouthful of champagne.

“Ok guys, Luke’s coming back.” Simon rushes back in the room, giving a disapproving look at Blake and Jasper who were in a fit of laughter. “Can you guys be serious for the next half hour, this is a big moment.” He scolds them. Jasper and Blake look at each other and laugh again while trying to calm themselves down. Luke walks in now fully suited up with his tablet in his hand, he had a focused expression as he went straight over to Ryan, handing him the tablet and showing him the ceremony plan they had sent their celebrant. Ryan nods and shows Luke his phone, with the details of his certification in an email. They both head over to in front of the curtain and fairylights, sunset was lighting the floor between the hallway to where Luke stood, with a beautiful orange glow. The timing was perfect. Luke gets a message on his tablet from Fi, saying she was ready to come in, and Blake, Simon and Jasper all line up along the walkway and the three start singing ‘Somebody to Love’ which Luke had been inspired from Simon’s week of influence to suggest as their walking down the aisle song. At the start of the first chorus, Fi opens the door and walks out of the room she’d been getting ready in, and starts heading down the hallway. It only takes her the chorus to be standing beside Luke, who was already tearing up. She looked gorgeous as always, her hair was up in a bun with a few stray curls beside her face, the dress a simple white gown with lace sleeves that went all the way down to her hands, held in place by a loop around her middle fingers, it was different from how the boys usually saw her, in more outgoing and vibrant outfits, but it suited her.

Fiona and Luke hold hands, Simon moves over to Luke’s side as his best man, while Jasper and Blake stand back, Blake had been tasked with recording their private little ceremony and Jasper was to take photos for them.

There was no denying that Ryan thrived in romantic settings, looking the happiest he had all week, now standing before his friend and wife to be, talking about their love, prompting them with their vows and ordering the exchanging of rings. He kept making eye contact with Jasper throughout, while Jasper tried to stay neutral, having all his life thought of weddings as more a form of ownership and spending the week making comments about how stupid he thought this wedding in particular was, he now felt his own inner romantic being drawn out by the passion in Ryan's voice during the ceremony. When at last Ryan announces that the couple were now husband and wife, and tells them to kiss, Ryan was careful not to look directly at Jasper, knowing this would be one of the moments where the couple would look back on the photo forever and thought it’d take away from their moment if he was caught looking straight down the lens at the person he loved, meanwhile from the safety of behind the phone Jasper couldn't take the smile off his face as his eyes focus on Ryan and his mind fills with a single thought that he'd been dismissing as a valid argument against whether they were going to work out in the future. Love is enough.

@Copyright (2018), Claire Rosalind; All Rights Reserved.
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"...Love is enough...."

not sure whether to cheer - or jeer.

but no matter your perspective on that statement - so thrilled to see another chapter!

Thanks, Little - hope you are navigating the world in a safe and secure manner!

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