I drove home in a fog. What the fuck was wrong with me? It was a good plan. I’d done what I’d had to protect Dane, I believed that. It didn’t change the anxiety in my chest crushing down on my lungs when I thought about how Dane would react. Chris had deserved payback for what he did, and I’d done more than ruin his social standing, I’d outed him to the entire world and I’d done it in the worst way possible. What would Dane say when he found out? I could already see the disappointment and anger marring his handsome face, hard grey eyes pinning me down.
My phone dinged with a text. Picking it up at the red light I looked down to see Dane’s name across the screen. Opening the app I read the three words typed across the screen, “Where are you?” I saw the incoming text dots before another one appeared right under it. “Get. Home. Now”. My heart drummed painfully as bile crept up the back of my throat. He knew, somehow he already knew.
I put my phone down and began to drive again. The drive home, usually scenic, felt like a trip to my death, each curve of the road dipping me that much deeper into the hole I’d somehow dug. I wasn’t afraid of Dane, but I was terrified of losing him,. What if this was more than he could take?
My hands clutched the steering wheel so tight my knuckles became white, aching from the force. I tensed even more as I pulled into the driveway of our house, the familiar comfort of home was absent when I saw Dane’s truck parked out front. The pounding that started in my heart doubled as it traveled down into my gut. Getting out of my truck, I shouldered my backpack and made the walk up to the front door trying to remember that there was nothing in this world that I could do that would make Dane not love me, I believed that.
The door handle was cool against my sweating palm as I pushed the door open. Inside the house was silent except for the low sounds coming from upstairs indistinguishable because of the distance and cadence. Taking a deep breath I took the steps leading upstairs.
Dane sat on the edge of his bed in his room, his focus on his phone that he clutched in his hand like a grenade that he was afraid to let go of because the pin had already been pulled. I’d pulled the pin and I knew it the moment I heard my moans and the familiar sound of shower water running. His brows were drawn into a hard line as he looked down at the video playing out across his phone probably for the hundredth time. There was tension in the line of his mouth, and a dark cloud rising in his steel grey eyes. He didn’t look up at me and he didn’t turn off the offensive video, the sounds making the guilt run deeper with every second, but it wasn’t guilt for Christ Mcalister. I had my doubts about what I’d done and if I could have done something differently, but Chris Mcalister had gotten what he deserved, tears or not. Fuck him and all the torture he mandated on Seth and others.
“What the hell is this, Ty?” Dane finally broke the silence, his voice low and dangerous.
I shrugged setting my backpack down near the bed. “He fucked with me, so I made sure he wouldn’t have the power to do that again,” and I’d made that an absolute fact. No one would give Chris Mcalister the time of day after this, at least not the people he was used to. Football was definitely out of the question once that homophobic coach found out. I could only imagine what his uptight prick of a father would do to him when he saw the video.
Dane rose up in a swift stiff backed stance tossing the phone down on the bed, throwing the grenade into the battle we were about to have. The image of Chris Mcalister on his knees with his mouth wrapped around my dick and my hand hard in his hair was paused across the screen, taunting me. My gaze focused on the phone I didn’t notice Dane step in front of me grabbing my chin to force my eyes onto him and his angry beautiful face. “Tell me the goddamn truth, Ty. Don’t hedge, I want to know why the hell you did this,” his warm breath ghosted across my cheeks, close, but not close enough.
My hand reached up to curl lightly around his wrist, his punishing grip biting but welcome. “On Tuesday when I went to school there were flyers scattered all over the campus, so many there still finding some. It was two guys fucking with our faced photoshopped on them and father fucker was written on the bottom,” the words came out with a tense breath, relief washing over me in a cooling wave. Telling him was like a world of pressure off my chest, sharing my burden with the one person I loved in this world. “O’shea wanted to tell you, bring social services into the mix, but I threatened to make allegations of sexual favors against him. He didn’t say a damn thing after that.”
Dane’s nostrils flared and he let go of my chin pacing back towards the armchair. “And you thought what? That you’d ruin this kid by exposing him? Because of some stupid pictures?” He racked his hand over his short hair, jaw tense.
I growled, anger rushing over me in a hot wave. “That ass brought you into this, he could have ruined your career with this! I wasn’t going to let that shit anywhere near you! I’ve dealt with services before, they don’t just come in and ask a few questions and leave, they dig your life apart to make absolutely fucking sure that there is nothing there. Can you imagine them questioning McLain? What shit would that fuck say?” I was almost shouting at this point, feeling the anger and despair mix into a cruel twist screaming for me to throw anything and everything I had into this argument. “You’re fucking mine! Mine to fucking protect! He shouldn’t have brought you into this, I would have ignored the flyers if it was just about me, but no one gets to hurt you, no one!” I snarled, breaths coming out in shallow pants.
Dane’s eyes narrowed, molten silver eyes burning me with their intensity. “I’m not yours to protect, you are mine to protect,” he paced in front of the bed, back stiff. “What if he accuses you of rape? Of holding him down and forcing him? Fuck, Ty.”
“I didn’t force that prick, he wanted my dick, he practically nosed dived on to it!”
“That’s not the goddamn point!” Dane shouted, voice angry and filled with something I hadn’t heard before, something sickly and familiar.
“What about Abbott? It’s ok for you to beat the shit out of that prick in an alleyway? How is that any different!” because it wasn’t, I’d protected him just like he always protected me. He was always the one keeping me afloat, after Seth’s death, when Abbott almost sent me back into my dark past, and when he came back for me after Jane and Mark’s death. He’d bartered five years of his life to keep me out of the system, to give me a home, a family, and love. It was my turn to protect him.
“It’s different, Ty because You used your body, and that’s mine,” he didn’t shout, he didn’t need to. His words pierced me like a well-thrown knife.
“I don’t—” understand, was what I was going to say, but the words caught in my throat when I caught the hot, sickly look in those grey eyes. I knew that monster, the one that road my back so hard when he brought that bitch home when he went to the ball with Sissy, and every single time he refused me. That monster and I had become close in the last few years, and now Dane knew her name too—
Dane approached me again, this time keeping a small distance between us. “You think that I haven’t loved you all these years? That I haven’t wanted to give in for a while now? You are mine Ty Huntsman. Mine to protect, mine to correct, mine to teach—” he walked forward closing the space between us placing his hand on my chest right over my drumming heart. “Mine to touch,” he said voice deep, eyes intense. “Every part of you is mine.”
I nodded, the words unable to escape the tight band in my throat. I swallowed to get past the lump, but my heart wouldn’t stop racing as adrenaline pumped into my veins. Was he saying what I thought he was saying? Was I hearing what I wanted to hear? “Dane— ” I love you, I wanted to say, but my voice cracked all the blood rushing from my head to my dick as his hand moved down from my chest to my belly right over the top of my pants.
“Fuck your godman birthday,” he growled before slamming his mouth over mine our teeth clicking from the force. I stumbled back a few steps knocking into the bedside table, my hand braced on the wood to catch myself the lamp tilting and crashing to the floor. Neither one of us paid it any attention, our lips melding in a frantic clash. This wasn’t gentle or tender like our past kisses, this was a desperate joining, a need to claim the other so that no one could ever separate us. My body needed his mark, for him to show the world I was his and he was mine and that no force short of death could separate us.
A moan escaped me as his tongue pushed into my mouth, demanding I gave in to him. I didn’t resist letting him control the kiss even as I returned it with as much heat. Nothing had prepared me for this. His hard hands pulled my shirt up, forcing our lips apart for only a second as I bared my chest to the cool air. His shirt followed mine, showing off all his defined muscles each line a curve I wanted to follow with my mouth. He didn’t give me the option, pushing me back onto the bed hands tracing down my heaving sides.
“Take your pants off,” he commanded.
I didn’t hesitate `my hands already undoing the button of my jeans as I forced them down with my underwear over my hips in a desperate shove. I don’t know what I expected, but when my erection was freed it was immediately swallowed down into tight wet heat.
“Dane!” I shouted, arching my back trying to spread my legs that were trapped by my pants. My hands fisted into his hair begging him to stay without words. He didn’t move much at first taking a slow pull off my sensitive flesh as if savoring the taste. After the second pass, he sucked harder, the intense pressure making my leg muscles quiver. No fantasy I’d ever created compared to actually having Dane’s mouth on me. My hips thrust up to chase after his retreating mouth, only to sink back in when he came down again an embarrassing whine escaping my lips.
“Please, D,” I groaned the slight graze of his teeth causing an electric tingle to race up my spine.
Hard hands grabbed my hips forcing them down onto the bed as he slowly went down further till I hit the back of his throat. He didn’t stay that way long before he was back up again running his tongue over the tip and into my slit. Panting wildly I felt the tight draw of my balls and the rush in my gut as I fought back the orgasm trying to rip out of me. My breaths came in desperate pants, anxiety coiling with wild need. Not yet, this couldn’t end yet. I wanted everything, I wanted to touch him more before we went back to being guardian and his kid. My teeth ground together as I fought the rush of pleasure threatening to explode from within.
“Ty,” Dane rumbled.
“No don’t stop,” I begged voice wrecked and breathless. “Don’t stop.”
“Ty, I’m not leaving,” he moved up my body, hovering over me. The muscles in his arm tight as he held his weight above me, watching me with concerned eyes. “Tell me what you want,” his hand drifted down my abdomen, a loving caress that was equally possessive.
“All of you,” and that was the truth. I wanted to be the one person on this earth that had all of him. My hand drifted down his fatigues to hover over his erection, straining against the fabric. Only for me, he didn’t feel this way for anyone else. No one else in this world could make Dane’s body beg for the love that his soul felt. He was mine, completely and his body knew it.
“You already have all of me,” he leaned down to press a kiss to the side of my throat. My arms wrapped around him on instinct, my hand threading through his short hair.
“Let me inside of you,” I said, barely getting it out past my groan of pleasure as Dane’s ass brushed over my erection. My hand drifted down to grasp his clothed ass and thrust myself up towards him. I wanted inside of him, needed to finally sink into the tight heat that belongs to me.
“Demanding as always,” Dane chuckled before turning over to lay out across the bed, a relaxed posture taking over his beautiful muscles. “Get what you need out of the drawer,” he told me as his hands began to undo his pants.
Nostrils flaring I moved quickly going to the bedside table to retrieve the lube that I knew was in there. It was in there for my use, since I’d had more than a few morning erections in the last year to stroke out. Dane never judge me for my sexual craving, his eyes would always track me, sometimes watch me, and now— My gaze drifted over to him on the bed, his naked form pliant stretched out like sin across the sheets. His tan skin glowed, his muscles defined and bulging, cock sticking up proudly from his body begging for attention. All of him was breathtaking, but it was his eyes that truly made my heart stop in my chest.
“Have you— ” done this before, the unsaid part of my question hanging in the air between us.
Dane smirked, crooking his knee to expose parts of himself I’d never seen before. My vision blurred and I forgot to breathe as my cock jerked impatiently. “I know what I’m doing. Now come here, I’ll show you what to do,” he teased.
“I-I know what to do,” I stuttered slightly and it wasn’t a lie, I knew what I was supposed to do to prepare him. Knowing didn’t stop the nervous shakes of inexperience as I crawled across our bed towards him. Stopping between his legs I took my fill of the image before me. His cock hard and leaking across his abdomen, his balls tight and drawn up against his body exposing his hole beneath
I licked my dry lips.
Dane snorted out a laugh, “Give me your hand, Ty.”
I did, holding the bottle of lube out to him. He took the bottle and grabbed my wrist pulling me till I was settled between his legs. “I’m going to show you what to do,” he said as he opened the bottle of lube, the snick of the cap loud in the silent room. Pulling my hand out flat he poured a generous amount onto my fingers before tossing the bottle back onto the covers of the bed. Grey eyes captured mine in an intense stare as he directed my hand towards, “show me what you know,” he said huskily.
A whine escaped me, my dick threatening to burst as I touched the tips of my fingers to Dane’s hole. Spreading the lube across his entrance, I stared, entranced by the sight of his body finally at my fingertips.
I pressed one finger in his tight heat, his body sucking me in desperately. Another deep whine escaped me as I fought the urge to thrust into the air, my dick straining for release. He was right, I had no idea what I was doing, only my inexperienced fumbling with Seth to go on.
“So impatient,” Dane teased, even as he groaned, thrusting downward onto my fingers. “More, you won’t break me,” he growled.
Quickly I added another feeling him stretch and become more pliant as I thrust into him. It was an evil tease, threatening to bring me over the edge if I didn’t get inside of him soon. Dane groaned, his head falling back against the headboard with a dull thud. “That’s it, Ty,” he muttered eyes closed as he enjoyed my touch.
His pleasure was like a drug, bringing a new high to the experience I hadn’t expected. This was more than sex, this was the moment where we became something more. I pulled my fingers out and lined up my cock. Dane groaned deep, his grey eyes opening long enough to make eye contact with me right before I slowly dipped into him for the first time.
“Ty,” Dane pulled me down slanting his mouth over mine as I fought the demanding urge to thrust all the way in. He nipped my mouth sharply, the taste of me still lingering. “Damn baseball bat between your legs,” he grunted, even as his hand grabbed onto my ass cheek guiding me deeper.
Growling I pulled back to grab his legs and pull him further down the bed before thrusting hard and shallow. Pleasure shot up my spin, the sight of Dane, the man I loved spread out, powerful body impaled on me — this was the ultimate pleasure in life, to be this close to the one person you loved the most in the world.
“Dane,” it came out a moan as I rutted into him slowly at first but unable to control the desperate pace once it began.
“I know,” he panted, his hand wrapped around his erection, the tip leaking a trail across his abdomen each time I thrust deep and shallow.
I couldn’t last like this, seeing him, feeling him all around me. Each thrust brought me closer to the edge, threatening to pull into an ecstasy I only dreamed of before. Dane jerked himself in time with my thrusts, his eyes closed and his face flushed.
“Ty,” he grabbed the back of my head pulling me down, his legs wrapping around my waist as our lips met. “I love you,” he said, lips ghosting over my ear.
“Dane,” pleasure ripped through me with a savage force. My hips thrust desperately into him as I marked him deep inside, the wet slide of my release easing my final movements. Dane moaned the hot splash of his own release coating our stomachs. We both lay there panting, the smell of our sex thick in the air.
“It’s,” Dane took a breath, “never been like that before.” A sudden laugh escaped him.
“Dane?” I looked down at him suddenly concerned.
He shook his head slightly, his eyes meeting mine, pulling my head down for another kiss as he rolled us both onto our sides. “This doesn’t change anything,” he said before capturing my lips again. “You still listen to me, understood.”
A happy rumbled escaped me as he kissed me my hands threading through his hair as he did. This was my heaven, being here with him. If I could bring back the people I’d lost and had them in my life again, that would be my utopia, but I didn’t need it. Having him like this was the greatest gift fate had ever designed for me. Every moment of suffering and loss I had endured was worth having this love.
I pulled away, our breaths mingling. “Always Dane,” every single day of my life, I would always follow him, no matter where it took us.
December 16th, 2017
I woke up knowing today was the beginning of my life. A warm glow radiated in my chest like the sun, destroying the cold ache of so many past pains and doubts. Everything was intense on a level I’d never acknowledged before. Dane was mine.
I rolled over to press my face into his pillow, feeling the cold of the spot he’d left half a few hours ago. Nothing, not even momentous mornings like this one would keep Dane in bed past his schedule. The man had a damn alarm clock build into his head. I’d say it was the military training that had made him so fastidious, but I was leaning more towards it being his OCD.
Getting up, I stretched my arms above my head before hunting down a pair of clean underwear and a shirt out of my drawer. It was nine am, so Dane had been awake for three hour. No doubt he had already worked out and was downstairs reading the newspaper and drinking a cup of coffee. Walking out of the room I practically jogged down the stairs. I had no fear that Dane would change his mind, that wasn’t who he was. Once he’d decided something it was set in stone. Granted, I wouldn’t be able to do any PDA’s or even talk about it with anyone, but I didn’t care. As long as within these four walls I could keep what we had then I could wait for everything else.
As I got closer to the kitchen the warm buttery smell of fresh pancakes wafted through the house. My stomach growled and I smiled as a fresh wave of happiness almost floored me. Dane’s back was to me as he cooked, flipping the pancakes artfully before plating one on a plate already stacked full. Quickly I walked up behind him and wrapped my arms around his naked waist, kissing his neck before resting my chin on his shoulder. I’d done this before, but in the past, he had ignored the overtly sexual nature of the greeting. Today was different, today he tilted his head up and captured my mouth kissing me gently before pulling away.
“Good morning,” was all he said before flipping another pancake.
“Morning D,” I said as I ran my hand over his defined stomach, the ripple of his muscles luring me in for more. “Thank you for cooking pancakes.”
He hummed you’re welcome to me. “Go put some plates down and get the syrup out. I did as I was told, pulling away from him begrudgingly to get some plates and glasses to set at the kitchen bar. Dane came over with the plate stacked with pancakes and set it down in the middle of the table.
“Last night— ” I started.
“As I said, doesn’t change anything,” Dane sat down beside me like he always did and started putting pancakes on our plates.
I smirked, loving that he still felt the need to fill my plate like he had when I was younger and didn’t eat enough. “It changes everything.”
He stopped and looked at me his grey eyes seeing past my physical form and all the way into my heart. He grabbed the back of my head pulling me forward so our foreheads were pressed together in a familiar pose. “I shouldn’t love you the way I do,” he said and I felt a small tremor quake through me but I didn’t say anything. “I shouldn’t, but I do and I won’t give that up. I can’t,” he growled and kissed me deeply.
Moaning I gave what he demanded, his lips hard but soft against my own, tasting like his morning coffee. It didn’t last long before he pulled away, a small grin on his face. “Eat your pancakes.”
“Yes, Sir,” I said with mock authority.
“Ty I—” the doorbell rang cutting off whatever it was he was going to say. My eyes drifted to the front of the house before back to Dane. We weren’t expecting anyone, not on a saturday morning at nine am. He was naked except for a pair of workout pants, but I had on boxers and a t-shirt.
“I’ll get it,” I said already walking through the living room towards the front door. I couldn’t help the happy smirk that seemed to be stuck on my face. Everything was as it should be, I was Dane’s completely and he was mine. We would get through the deployment somehow, I would go to college and try to keep busy while he was gone. Nothing could stand in our way.
As I opened the door and saw the person on the other side I couldn’t help but remember Mark once told me. Happiness was like a tower of Jenga pieces, something you had to constantly build and maintain because there would always be someone or something that would take a piece out of the tower threatening to destroy the entire thing. As I stared into the familiar brown eyes standing on our doorstep I felt those Jenga pieces start to fall in a heavy life altering rush.
DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNN
sex scenes are not easy for me to write so I hope I did these two justice.