The Price of Revelation - 8. Chapter 8

The Price of Revelation
by Tiffani Chin

Chapter 8

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“Where’s Sean?” West shouted above the music and voices, looking around the crowded house. He scanned the packed room, grateful for his height. He didn’t see Sean anywhere.

Kessler looked at him with bleary eyes. He blinked, staggering over to the wall for support. “Huh?”

“Sean. Your friend? Remember him?” West pressed in annoyance. He spied Edison talking with some girls on the couch and knew his friend was drunk from the way he gestured wildly. West snorted in disgust. Why did everyone feel the need to get drunk at parties? Was it some unofficial rule?

“I don’t know. He’s around…somewhere,” Kessler slurred. “Gotta piss.” He walked off, pushing clumsily through the throngs of people.

West ground his teeth, wondering where to look for Sean. He had been keeping an eye on Sean all night. He couldn’t help it; Sean had been sipping numerous cups of the mystery punch all night. West knew it was definitely spiked. He didn’t know Sean that well, but he had a feeling that the guy was a lightweight in the drinking department.

West happened to be nudged into the window, his elbow accidentally pushing aside the blinds. He caught sight of a lone figure tripping outside on the streets. West immediately recognized the layered shirts Sean had been wearing. He shoved people aside and ran out the front door. A car honked loudly as it passed, narrowly missing Sean’s hip.

West sharply took in a breath. “Fuck, Sean!”

Sean stumbled and was about to fall face first into the asphalt, his arms flailing awkwardly. West rushed forward and lunged, wrapping an arm around Sean’s waist, yanking him up. West maintained his balance with his other leg and arm and pulled their combined weight up.

“Sean,” West murmured, pressing Sean against his own body.

Sean hummed and mumbled incoherently as he tried to walk forward again. West pulled him back. “Sean, where are you going?”

“Walk. Hot,” Sean answered his voice thick.

“You’re going to get yourself killed,” West said trying to steer Sean back to the party. “Let’s get back to the house.”

Sean struggled weakly in his arms. “No. Too hot.” He tried walking again, but West tightened his grip.

West looked around. Hunter had a big house and a lot of grassy areas with trees to lounge around. “Okay. We’ll hang outside.” He half dragged, half walked with Sean to the front of Hunter’s house where it was considerably less noisy. Most people were in the living room and the outdoor pool. A few people were strewn under the trees making out, but near the sidewalk and driveway it was quiet.

West eased down into a sitting position, carefully taking Sean along with him. It took a few tries because Sean was completely useless in seating himself. Finally, West had Sean sitting against him, with Sean’s back against his chest. West sighed and easily supported Sean’s weight. He lightly rested his arms around Sean’s stomach.

Sean murmured something and sank into West.

“What did you say?” West asked moving his ear closer.

Sean snuggled into West, the back of his head resting under West’s chin. “This is nice.”

A cool breeze washed over them. West inhaled deeply, loving the fresh air. “Yeah, this is nice,” he agreed softly, looking down at Sean. Sean’s eyes were closed and his breathing had evened out. The minutes passed in silence.

“West?”

West blinked in surprise, having thought that Sean was asleep. “Yeah?”

“You’re not so bad,” Sean mumbled, wiggling in West’s grip. He turned his head so that his forehead rubbed West’s chin.

West dragged his fingertips across Sean’s cheek. It was so soft, so smooth. “Same to you.” He reached down and took Sean’s hand, which was small, slender, and pale in comparison to his larger, rougher, callused hands. Placing their palms together, West slowly closed his hand, lacing their fingers.

Sean sighed, this time falling asleep soundly.

West kissed Sean’s forehead. After he did, he had no idea what compelled him to do so.

 

******

 

“You slept together?” Kessler yelled.

“Lower your voice!” Sean hissed looking around the restaurant. “We didn’t sleep together. We just lay side by side while we both slept,” he corrected flushing.

Kessler blinked then laughed. “So damn technical, Sean.”

“I was drunk. Nothing happened. I was fully clothed. He was fully clothed,” Sean shrugged. “If you were a good friend you wouldn’t have ditched me.”

“I didn’t ditch you; I passed out.”

“Same thing. You weren’t conscious and thus abandoned me,” Sean explained. “West said I almost got hit by a car.”

“Can’t take you anywhere,” Kessler sighed shaking his head.

Sean made a face as he took a big sip of juice.

“Are you going to hook up with him now?” Kessler asked.

Sean coughed out some of his eggs. “Kess, he’s not gay!”

“He’s been awfully thoughtful and caring towards you,” Kessler went on. “Methinks there’s something behind that,” he sang out.

Sean rolled his eyes. “You don’t know shit.”

“Maybe,” Kessler agreed. “But I also know there’s a possibility he’s hot for you. You can’t assume everyone is straight. He hasn’t said so, has he?”

“No,” Sean said. “But he knows I’m gay. He hasn’t said anything about himself, so he’s straight.”

“Okay, let me ask you this,” Kessler began. “If he was gay, would you go for him?”

“Kessler! What’s with the sudden interest in my love life?” Sean demanded.

“I don’t know. I sensed some kind of vibe between you two. I have a curious mind,” Kessler shrugged. “I want to see what happens or solve the puzzle.”

“Whatever. We’re not even friends, so don’t get ahead of yourself. But to answer your question, even if he was gay, no I wouldn’t do anything with him. Why bother? I don’t live here. As for a hookup, maybe, but knowing me, I might get attached,” Sean stated.

“Like a girl.”

“That just means I have more emotional depth than you breeders,” Sean said lifting his chin. “Nothing wrong with that.”

Kessler crowed. “Sean, you’re too much.”

“I’ll miss you,” Sean said abruptly. Kessler would be flying home the next day and Sean would miss the company of his best friend.

Kessler’s expression softened. “You’ll be home in six weeks. That’s not too bad. The time will fly by, especially with Edison and West. It’s not like you’re completely alone with no one to hang out with. It could be worse.”

“True.”

“Excited to come home though?” Kessler asked.

Sean shrugged. “Yes and no. I’m having a better time here than I expected. Edison is cool. So is West.” He shot a warning look at Kessler. “Your visit also helped. That was a surprise.”

“I’m a little stressed about going home. College. I always get nervous about a new school year,” Sean reminded Kessler. “College is even worse. New people and a whole new environment.”

“Yeah, but I’m excited. I like the idea of getting away from high school and all those kids. I get to schmooze with college girls,” Kessler grinned.

Sean laughed. “Horn dog!”

“Takes one to know one!” Kessler quipped.

Sean shook his head. For some reason his mind drifted to West. Tall, dark, and handsome West. All those muscles. Those emotional eyes. The cool personality with a bit of an edge. He shifted and crossed his legs.

“What are you thinking about?” Kessler asked, tilting his head thoughtfully.

Sean blushed, but fought to keep his voice neutral. “Nothing.”

Kessler eyed him. Then his face lit up. “You were thinking about West, weren’t you? I knew it! You’re hot for him!” He pointed accusingly at Sean.

“No!”

“Blink if you’re lying!” Kessler cried out gleefully with a big smile on his face.

Sean automatically blinked. Kessler was tearing up from laughing so hard.

“My eyes were dry! I had to blink!” Sean protested, giggles threatening to bubble forward. Then he chucked a sausage link at Kessler. “Oh shut up!”

 

******

 

“Sammy, stay right here,” Storm ordered as he took their food containers to the garbage. “I’ll be right back. Do not move until I come back, understand?”

Sammy nodded as he continued to chew his mouthful of food. Storm smiled, before walking off. He was wiping his hand with a napkin, when he heard someone calling his name. Turning with a questioning look on his face, he noticed a coworker waving at him.

Checking to make sure Sammy was still sitting down, Storm briefly chatted with Joe.

“How’s it going?” he asked. “Here with Christine and Abby?”

“Christine is buying Abby more food while Abby is on the carousel,” Joe answered shrugging good-naturedly. “Family outings. A little boring, but it makes Abby happy.”

Storm smiled. “At least the weather is working for us. We’re out of that humid heat wave.”

“Thank God,” Joe sighed in relief. “I hate being drenched in my own sweat and filth. I mean, Storm, it’s not right to be sweating when I’m not doing anything.”

Storm laughed. “I agree, I agree.”

“Here with Rachel and the kids?” Joe asked looking around.

“Just Sammy. Rachel is feeling tired because of her allergies and is resting at home. It was such a beautiful day I decided to take Sammy out,” Storm answered. “Sean is in California for the summer visiting my brother,” he said vaguely.

Joe looked around. “Where’s Sammy? Does he want to ride that swinging thing with Abby?”

Storm smiled. “I’m sure he would.” He looked where Sammy was sitting and his heart dropped. His eyes darted frantically around the picnic area. Sammy was nowhere to be found.

“Storm?” Joe asked with concern.

Without answering, Storm moved forward anxiously, knocking into people. “Sammy!” he called out. He swiveled around continuously, scanning desperately over the sea of heads, hoping to spot a his son. Kids were running around but none were Sammy.

Taking long strides, he felt his chest tighten and sweat form along his brow. “Sammy!” he shouted. “Sammy!”

He checked the food area again then ran to the bathrooms. Still no sign of Sammy. Running his hands through his hair, he felt the urge to cry. “Fuck, fuck!”

“Storm…” Joe began as he walked up.

“Is there some kind of intercom system here?” Storm asked panting heavily. “I lost Sammy. He was sitting right there! Fuck!”

“Keep looking. I’ll go to the entrance and see if they can get out an announcement for Sammy,” Joe said slapping Storm’s back. “Let me tell Christine.”

Storm nodded and tugged at his hair. “Where are you, Sammy?” he whispered.

He continued searching, walking around aimlessly, the anticipation burning in his stomach. He checked the bathrooms, every food stand, and every cotton candy stand.

He checked under the tables. He walked back and forth along the park.

Having trouble breathing, Storm crouched on the ground, burying his head in his hands. The sweat dripping down his forehead stung his eyes. Taking a deep breath, he stood up and looked around, feeling sick.

He felt a tap on his shoulder. He whirled around, irritated and frustrated. A pretty young girl was smiling uncertainly at him. “Is he yours?”

Storm looked down and felt his knees buckle when he stared into his son’s small face.

“Daddy!”

In one swift motion, Storm swooped Sammy into his arms. “Oh, God, Sammy. I told you not to move! Why did you walk off?” he demanded. “Why did you do that to me? Why?”

“I didn’t…”

“You did! Don’t you ever do that again, do you hear me? When I tell you to stay somewhere, you stay there! You do not move. Ever!” Storm snapped in a loud voice, laced with anger and relief. He smiled tightly at the girl, who nodded, and walked in the direction of the gift shop.

Sammy’s eyes were large and brimming with tears. “Daddy.”

Storm let out a breath, pinching his nose, rubbing his eyes. “I’m sorry, Sammy. Just don’t ever do that again. Please, don’t ever walk off without telling me.”

Sammy nodded, hugging Storm’s neck with one arm. Storm noticed Sammy was holding an ice cream cone in the other. He frowned. “Sammy, where did you get that?”

Sammy looked confused. “Huh?”

Storm set Sammy on the ground. “Where did you get that ice cream cone?” he asked, a cold feeling creeping into him. “Did that girl give it to you?”

Sammy smiled and licked his cone. “Sean’s friend.”

Storm swallowed hard. “What?” he croaked. “Who? Kessler?” he asked hopefully. “Charlotte? Tyler?”

Sammy shook his head. “Ethan.”

Storm felt as if he had been dunked in a tub of ice cold water, the way his blood froze. “Ethan?” he breathed incredulously. “Are you sure?”

Sammy nodded. “He say hello to me. Say he misses Sean. Ask me if I misses Sean, too. I do,” he said innocently.

Storm’s throat tightened. “Ethan said that? Where is he?” he asked looking around.

Sammy shrugged. “Don’t know.” He continued licking his ice cream, which melted onto his tiny fingers.

Storm was filled with a rage that consumed him. Ethan was after Sean and now he was messing with Sammy. What was Ethan trying to do? Was Ethan going after his family?

Impulsively, Storm swatted the cone out of Sammy’s hand. It landed on the ground with a splat.

“Daddy!” Sammy exclaimed, a pout beginning to form. “My ice cream.”

Storm lifted Sammy into his arms, hugging his son tightly. “I’ll get you a new one.” He kissed Sammy’s forehead. “We’re leaving now. I’ll get you a new ice cream cone.”

Briskly, he walked to the exit, glancing around. Storm felt as if he was being watched and he couldn’t shake off the uneasy feeling that had come over him. Apparently sending Sean off to California wasn’t enough.

Storm was positive that his family has yet to see the last of Ethan.

 

******

 

“Want to hear something weird?” West asked staring at Sean.

Ever since their smoothie hangout the previous week, he and Sean have been spending more time together.

West blamed Edison. Stupid Edison was in summer school because he had failed two classes during his freshman year and had changed majors three times. West needed company; that’s why he sought out Sean on a near daily basis. West would have to keep telling himself that.

Sean looked up from his plate of food, his long dark lashes fluttering slightly, revealing the bright hazel color of his eyes. Today they appeared green because of the shirt he was wearing. A funny feeling made its way to West’s stomach. He quickly pushed it aside and focused on his story.

“Sure,” Sean said sipping his soda.

“My younger brother came out this weekend,” West announced.

Sean’s eyes widened. “Really? How did it go?”

“Supposedly he had been dropping hints to the family and finally told everyone,” West paused, “but me and our dad.”

“How come?”

“He didn’t know how we would react,” West explained. “It’s understandable, I guess, but I felt a little hurt, considering I had never been mean to my brother.”

“Are you sure?” Sean raised a brow.

“Yes!” West exclaimed shooting a dirty look at Sean, who laughed. “I’m very nice to my siblings.”

“Okay, okay. So what happened?”

West shrugged. “It wasn’t a big deal. My father said something really funny. He said, ‘With trying to keep five kids out of trouble, away from drugs, and off the streets, having them turn out gay isn’t the worst thing in the world, although it will take some time getting used to, so try to bear with us,’” West quoted.

“No shit!” Sean laughed. “Did he really say that?”

West nodded. “My brother laughed a long time. He said he cried a little and there was a lot of hugging going on. I don’t know why he was so worried. We’re a pretty close family.”

“Coming out is always scary. Some cases are worse than others,” Sean said.

“He said he was worried about my reaction the most.” West shook his head. “He said I was a macho jock and figured I’d beat his ass. That really hurt.”

Sean cocked his head. “Can’t blame us for being scared though. As for your brother, I can see why he’d think that about you.”

West frowned.

“Oh, come on,” Sean cajoled. “When I first met you, you were this big, hulking presence. You look like an asshole. It’s just your face and whole demeanor.”

“Hey!”

“Your features are mean, hard, and stony looking,” Sean continued, smiling slightly.

“But I wouldn’t hate someone for being gay, especially my own brother!”

“How would he know that?” Sean shot back. “Coming out is scary. We never know how our friends and family will react. We can never assume the response will be good. There are cases when kids are kicked out, abused, raped, or even killed. It’s a huge risk.”

“Was it a good coming out for you?” West asked suddenly curious.

Sean chuckled. “Yeah, but my family is an exception.”

“Why?”

“Everyone is gay.”

West looked dumbfounded. “Uh, what?”

“Well you already know that my Uncle Skyler is gay. All my dad’s close friends from college are gay. So because of their partners, I have a ton of gay uncles. Coming out for me was easy. My dad didn’t even blink.”

West whistled. “Wow, you are lucky.”

Sean nodded. “I have people to talk to and I know that they will support me, but it doesn’t necessarily make it easier for me to accept myself.”

“Everything in life becomes harder. I’m completely normal, but people think gay defines who I am. I’m that gay kid,” Sean snorted. “That sucks. That’s only a small part of me and my life. I have other interests. I have straight friends. I do normal things. Then everywhere I go, I have to worry about the possibility of running into the wrong people, or being at the wrong place at the wrong time. Imagine getting jumped just because I’m gay? That blows!” Sean said getting riled up.

“I’m walking down the street and wham! Someone punches me because I look gay or I stared too long at a guy. Fucking bullshit. Like straight people are so much better.” He rolled his eyes heatedly.

West smirked. “Calm down, feisty rabbit,” he laughed, resisting the sudden urge to pinch Sean’s cheeks.

Sean narrowed his eyes.

West held up his hands. “I sympathize! Don’t give me that look. I’m sure it’s rough. I worry about my brother. He’s a small guy, well smaller than me, and very shy and trusting. One of those people.”

“Does your brother have a boyfriend?” Sean wondered aloud.

West narrowed his eyes. “Why?” he asked sharply.

“I thought maybe that’s why he came out,” Sean shrugged, surprised at the sudden gruffness in West’s voice.

West relaxed. “No, he didn’t mention a boyfriend. But then again, maybe he’s interested in some guy. I don’t know. He’s closer with our other brother.”

“It’s because you’re so mean and scary,” Sean teased.

West tossed a French fry at Sean. Sean picked it up off the table and popped it into his mouth. “Thanks.”

“Well, I hope your brother has better luck with dating than I do,” Sean sighed. “My first and only ex-boyfriend was not ideal. I thought he was really great, but he wasn’t exactly what I was looking for.”

“Too old?”

“Not just that, but he wasn’t someone I would want to be with long term. I got caught up in my first relationship, but he’s not considerate and he has some serious mood swings,” Sean shook his head. “He was just too rough,” Sean blurted out. He bit his lip, realizing what he had just said.

“Rough?” West asked frowning. “What do you mean?”

Sean licked his gums, not knowing why he threw that out without even thinking. “Umm,” he murmured, wondering if he should tell West about his first sexual experience with Ethan. West stared at him expectantly.

Sean leaned forward, feeling as if he could trust West. “I had sex with Ethan,” he whispered. “Like real sex,” he raised his brow. “I was so nervous and I wasn’t really ready, but I guess I was horny so I got caught in the moment.”

“And…” West said curiously, wondering where this was going. Sean had told him about his older ex and the problems it had caused between him and his father, but that was about it.

“It hurt so fucking much,” Sean mumbled shamefully. He looked into West’s eyes. “I wanted to stop, but he didn’t; he kept going. It hurt. It hurt a lot.”

“I mean, I knew it was going to hurt. But I didn’t expect it to hurt that much. He didn’t even listen to me or care that I was in such pain. I begged him…”

West grew hot. His fists clenched.

“That’s when I sort of had doubts about him, about us, but then he was so sweet afterwards. He got me a ring…” Sean trailed off, rubbing his finger, as if remembering the weight of the jewelry. “Said he would miss me and that I was special.”

“This guy sounds like a manipulative prick,” West interrupted. “Don’t trust those guys, Sean. My older sister dated a guy like that once. He would act real jealous and possessive, slap her around a bit. Then he’d buy her flowers and gifts and take her to fancy places until she took him back. I beat the shit out of him once I found out he was hurting my sister. He never came back for seconds.”

Sean smiled faintly. “Really?”

“Fuck, yeah!” West exclaimed. “I wasn’t going to let my sister take that shit. He got real scared when he was messing with someone his own size. Such fucking cowards, those types of guys.”

Sean chuckled.

“Sean, I would kick your ex-boyfriend’s ass,” West offered.

“What?” Sean laughed.

“You’re a small guy. It’s not fair for a bully to pick on a smaller guy just because he can,” West explained.

“Like that time you elbowed my nose?” Sean pointed out wryly. “I thought you broke it; it was bleeding that much.”

West hung his head. “Okay, sorry. I don’t know why I acted like that. Something about you was so annoying.”

“Annoying?” Sean demanded. “You didn’t even know me!”

West shrugged. “Ever meet someone that made you feel something and you just acted out without knowing why?”

“No.”

“That’s how I felt with you. I still can’t figure it out,” West said.

Sean frowned. “But you don’t hate me anymore?” he asked skeptically. “You’re not secretly plotting my death are you?”

West looked at Sean and his lips curved. “No, Sean. I don’t hate you. I definitely don’t hate you.”

Sean felt that familiar flush come over him every time West stared at him too long.

West cleared his throat. “So, want to play basketball with us tomorrow?” he asked. “Edison doesn’t have class.”

“Umm, that’s okay,” Sean said in a breezy voice. “I’m kind of tired, you know, from life in general.” He grinned teasingly.

“Oh, come on. I promise not to hit you again.” West made a face. “That was a one time thing!”

“Wow, that was convincing,” Sean rolled his eyes.

“I swear I won’t. You can be on my team. Let’s gang up on Hunter,” West suggested.

“Why Hunter?” Sean asked smiling.

West shrugged. “Because I haven’t hassled him in a while? And I’m trying to be fair with everyone? Equal opportunity hater?”

Sean burst out laughing. “You’re fucking crazy, West.” He cocked his head. “Hey, what’s your full name?” Sean asked suddenly.

“Weston Chadwick Smith,” West replied automatically.

Sean stared at him blankly. “Are you fucking serious?” he asked in a low tone.

“Um, yeah,” West answered blinking. “Why?”

“What kind of name is Weston Chadwick?” Sean asked incredulously. “It sounds like some lame aristocrat who joins the army to be all noble and honorable or something. What were your parents smoking when they named you?”

“Hey!” West exclaimed although he couldn’t help laughing.

“What are the names of your brothers and sisters?” Sean demanded curiously.

“My older sister and I got weird names. I think after us two, they decided to give normal names,” West said. “My older sister’s name is Waverly.”

Sean choked on his soda. “What?”

West nodded. “Waverly and Weston.” He sighed. “But the rest of the kids got Jonathan, Mason, and April.”

“Very normal names,” Sean hummed. He grinned. “Actually, Waverly sounds pretty. Your name just sucks! Loser!”

West threw the remainder of his fries at Sean, suddenly feeling playful. Sean simply smiled and picked the fries off his lap and shirt and stuffed them into his mouth. “Thank you for feeding me.”

West shook his head. “You’re something else.”

“Whatever,” Sean stuck his tongue out. “I got you to be nice to me. I’m magical.”

West smiled and stared at Sean. He had never really clicked with anyone or talked so honestly with anyone before, guy or girl. There was a quality about Sean that pulled West in, made him relax, and made him feel.

Yeah, Sean had some magic to him.

 

******

 

“Dad?” West asked walking into the study.

“Hmm?” the older man mumbled, engrossed in the newspaper.

“Are you really okay with Jonathan, you know, coming out?” West asked, running his sweaty palms along his jeans.

His father looked at West. “Of course. Jon isn’t any different now. Do you have a problem with it?” His eyes narrowed in concern towards his eldest son. “If so, we need to have a serious talk…”

“No!” West exclaimed, grabbing his hair. “I was just wondering…”

“Yes?”

“Okay, I don’t know for sure,” West began, licking his lips.

“West, what’s going on?” his father asked frowning.

“Dad, I think I might be like Jonathan,” West blurted out.

West watched as his father blinked several times, the wheels turning in his head. “You mean?” he asked. “You’re…?” The elder Smith couldn’t keep the shock from his voice.

“I don’t know, Dad. I just met this guy. He’s a friend of Edison’s. I think I like him. There’s something about him,” West said awkwardly, not really understanding his own feelings. He wasn’t used to analyzing his thoughts and feelings. Usually, things were simple. West accepted facts. He never questioned the possibilities. Until now. He didn’t know what to do and that was why he was running to his father.

His father hummed. “You boys are full of surprises,” he murmured. “Two in a row,” he grinned ruefully. His expression turned serious when he met his son’s troubled eyes.

“There’s something about this guy. I don’t know. It’s annoying,” West blew out his breath in frustration.

“Tell me about him. Maybe talking will help.”

“Dad…”

“I’m serious, West. It does work. Try it,” his father insisted. He put aside his newspaper and folded his hands. “I’m all ears. Just you and me. Tell me.”

West sat down, scratching his forehead. “Here goes. His name is Sean and he’s…”

After he talked for a good forty-five minutes, West looked up at his father who wore a thoughtful expression on his face.

West let out a long breath. “Well?” he asked impatiently.

His father smiled. “Well what? Am I supposed to say something?”

“Yeah, any thoughts?” West said sarcastically. “I’m pouring out my heart about some boy I just met. You don’t have anything to say? Nothing at all?”

“I have a few questions.”

West sighed in relief. “Okay, good.”

“You dated all those girls throughout high school and college. I assume you’ve slept with them.”

“Um, yeah,” West answered as if it were obvious.

His father smiled. “Did you feel anything with those girls? Not those physical feelings,” the man laughed. “But did you feel anything more? Anything deeper? Not just pleasure?”

“Like a connection?”

His father nodded.

“No, not really. It was just something to do and there were plenty of girls wanting it. And I was horny.” West blushed, not believing he was being so open about his sex life with his old man. “Everyone else was having sex. It wasn’t a big deal,” West continued.

“What do you feel when you’re with Sean?”

“I haven’t done anything with him!” West exclaimed, wiping the sweat from his brow. When did it get so hot in here? “I’m not ready for that yet!”

“West, work with me here!” his father shot back in exasperation. “When you’re spending time with Sean, how do you feel?”

West closed his eyes and pinched his nose with his fingers. “I like being with him. He’s funny and genuine. One of those people who aren’t fake. He couldn’t be fake even if he tried. I hate fake people. He’s kind of innocent, definitely naïve, like a little kid, especially with the way his eyes light up whenever there’s food around.

“He’s smart. He’s a good friend and a good brother. The other day he was making kissing noises into the phone with his five old year old brother. How cute was that? I just feel really good when I’m with him. Even with my friends, it seems so half-assed and forced, like I’m not really there. With Sean, I’m actually there, listening to him, being myself, and everything.”

“Is he good-looking?”

West’s eyes popped open, but then he shrugged casually. “He’s cute. My complete opposite. Kind of like April and mom, the dark hair and light eyes, small build.”

His father nodded. “Your mother was a real looker, with those eyes of hers. Still is.” His voice held a dreamy quality.

West wrinkled his nose. “Dad. Please.” He pretended to gag.

“Alright, let’s focus on you. You’re the one with the problem.”

“What problem?” West asked.

“From everything we’ve talked about, I can safely say that I have two gay sons.”

“Dad!” West nearly yelled. “Seriously?”

His father laughed. “West, sometimes you’re so stupid. A thick-headed guy who’s been hit on the head one too many times. We’ve spent nearly an hour talking about this Sean guy who you think is cute and that you enjoy spending time with him. You even mentioned that he smells good! I think it’s pretty clear where your sexuality lies.”

“But I can get it up for a girl,” West protested, not liking the idea of being gay.

Sure, he had no problems with gay guys; he even knew several from school. But he didn’t want to be gay. Would people talk about him now? Look at him differently?

“Then maybe you’re bisexual?” his father suggested.

West’s shoulders sank. “Maybe,” he sighed. “This is messed up. I’m not supposed to feel this way.”

His father looked at him gently. “West, like your mother and I told your brother, we’ll still love you no matter what. We love all you kids. Dealing with your sexuality can be tough. Jonathan is thinking about going to counseling, to work out some of his issues. I don’t know about you, but you seem to be handling this well. You’re not freaking out. Then again, you’ve never cared what others thought, so this doesn’t surprise me.”

“I could always beat up people who give me trouble,” West pointed out flexing. He was thankful that he got his father’s height and solid build.

His father smiled. “That’s the fighting spirit I know and love about you, West. Keep your chin up.”

“Dad, you’re so lame.”

“You can talk to me anytime, West,” Mr. Smith said sympathetically.

“I know, Dad. Thanks.”

But it wasn’t that simple. West had a lot more thinking to do.

 

---

 

Thanks to Frances for editing! And a special thanks to Pete and Mike for beta-reading and giving me feedback and encouragement.