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Found 2 results

  1. Attention! This post does contain some actual swearing. Posted this to Tumblr earlier, where it was well-received. Thought I'd share with the community as well. There are a lot of comparatively mild curse words that we just accept as being family friendly without much thought as to where they come from. Some are just milder versions of a word we consider unacceptable, such as saying 'crap' instead of 'shit' or 'darn' instead of 'damn'. Others have so completely lost their original meanings that no one even considers them anymore. Here are some fairly common British ones, with pop-culture examples for your enjoyment: tosser n. One who masturbates; same as wanker. 'Who's Harry Potter?' 'Oh, no one. Bit of a tosser, really.' —Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (seen by millions of children) bugger, sod v. To sodomise someone n. One who sodomises 'Bludgers. Nasty little buggers.' —Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (Again, seen by millions of children) 'Sod this, you stay here if you want. On your own.' —Sherlock, S02E03: The Reichenbach Fall (prime time TV) berk n. Short for ‘Berkley Hunt’ or ‘Berkshire Hunt’, which is Cockney rhyming slang for ‘cunt’. 'Then what the hell did you tackle me for, you berk?' —Rupert Giles, Buffy the Vampire Slayer And there are so many more. Like, how many people who use the word 'douchebag' actually think about what that originally entailed?
  2. Since it's becoming clear that I am so far from finished with these two, I've decided that this collection of shorts deserves its own thread. To make things simple, all stories posted about in this thread carry a mature rating and contain copious amounts of gratuitous swearing and most of them also contain a bit of a masochist kink. You have been warned. They are all betaed by the wonderful Sasha Distan. The Jacob & Marcus Tales The F*cking Trilogy: Part One: Soft Marcus is the maladjusted, borderline sadistic and really quite brilliant editor-in-chief of the campus newspaper, and Jacob wants him. The only problem is that Jacob is just about as maladjusted and out of touch as the object of his desire. Part Two: Hard Marcus manages his stressful life by being in control of, and on top of, everything at all times, including his lover, Jacob. But everything becomes just a little bit too much when Marcus has to deal with his dying father, the man who made his childhood a living hell, and in the end there's only one person Marcus can turn to. Part Three: Weak Marcus and Jacob have been at it for four months, but now people are starting to figure it out and it's threatening the delicate balance of their relationship. Marcus is preoccupied with writing his dissertation, and Jacob is even more angry than usual. Epilogue: Strong Ten years have passed since editorial meetings and the Student Union. Ten years since angry sex and verbal abuse. And everything is different now. Everything. Contains gratuitous swearing and angsty revelations. Firsts Jacob doesn't really like Oliver, but somehow he seems to be his first for almost everything. Marcus hates his life, and his dad, and pretty much everything in his dreary industrial town, but makes a go at trying out new things anyway. Two short stories set before The F*cking Trilogy. Then Things Happened After meeting again after ten years, Jacob comes to visit Marcus, and, in their thirties now, both men are forced to examine their feelings and consider what their futures will hold. Contains gratuitous swearing, and some domestic fluff. Sex, Booze & Consequences They're no good without one another. They both know that, deep down. Because when they're apart, they make some really stupid decisions. Contains gratuitous swearing and a whole lot of booze. What Meg Said Meg loves her parents. All three of them. But maybe, in the end, especially Pa. Contains some swearing. Moments A few missing moments in the lives of our dysfunctional heroes. Contains gratuitous swearing and a lot of domestic fluff.
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