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Me: Hey! Hi ! Hello ! How are you ? Can we be friends ? I am so like that! it is so funny that I am so hopeful that I can find my true love. True love that I can’t see , it’s like I am blind or that “true love” is so far to see . I am now 18 ! and that existence I didn’t have a relationship yet! I have so many crushes and sadly none of them like me? Am I ugly? “ looking at the mirror” Me: No , my friends and other says I’m cute . Am I super girly? Me: No Am I sweet ? Me: sometimes Maybe months have passed, I started chatting on many guys online, I found out that I am inlove to guys who is older than me, like some of my batch mates are for crush and for day dreaming only. I am a joker in class, I make the whole class laugh ! What’s wrong with me? Why like there are no guys wants me? “urghhhh” . Everyday and night I didn’t stop to add guys , text them , or call them if I am so upset that no one really want me. Maybe some says they have their “bf” “hubby” “honey “ “mine” or “my boo” etc. Some says they are not yet ready. Some says they want to see me real and meet me. And like “ hooooo” you know what is the reason why ? I look for that ideal man! “No” I mean the man who can love me truly, accept me, care for me, and willing to visit me here in country. The main reason why I don’t have any bf right now because I am looking for a foreign guy or some guys from other country. Look how many guys I added on Facebook, followed on Instagram, and etc. Like maybe there are only 4-5 persons last for a month in chat. They say that love is hard when you are in different country , “ yeah , I know “ but we can be if we will do something which will make us strong. One time I said to myself I should wait, until one time, I was about to sleep and I am still scrolling who is onlins, and I saw a message request coming from a guy in London, not so cute but he has that look. Like he is so sweet and weeks after chatting, he is now saying that he loves me! OMG! and I really don’t that he is 25 !!! but then I should say that I am so lucky ! I expect so much , and this is it, I said my “YES” and we are both so happy after. After 2 weeks he said that he has plans for me, so sometimes he is busy on his work and he is hardly working. Before our monthsary maybe 4 days before , I was like waiting to him to get online, and then my text is became like an essay! he is not replying or even say “Good morning, or even a thumbs up” . 🙄 Is this real? like at first he really loves me , and he always say those excuse that he is so busy. So after 4 days is our Monthsary, like I am the one who greet him and made a long sweet message. Then the only reply he said was “ thank you” Whaaaatttt??? I am a kind person so I understand him. 2nd Month , like sometimes we do video call and we are like laughing while he is walking to go to his work, then he’s like making me happy. After weeks, is our second Monthsary and like he greet me, then I said “ I love you” and like I am so blushing all day when I think of him. I suggested to him that he must have an haircut because he has long hair , then he said that soon! After all these days, he was like a smoke like gone for a week, then he is calling me like he is drunk, like his face was so haggard and stressed, so I really worry about him, you know what’s worse that he said to me that “ You may leave” like I don’t understand him that night. So we ended the video call incompletely and I am worried . Early in the morning I open my inbox from Messenger he was apologizing , and like I forgive him. That’s me easy to forgive and very kind. To be Continued.

The other evening a friend said to me; "The hard times are when I think about my vows to my husband. And that helps. We all have troubles, but we can be the constant in the lives of those we love. There's something sublime and wonderful about that." He's right, of course. Being there for others, a partner or friend, is a wonderful feeling. Those vows we make when we marry are not just words to be said because 'that's what you do'. No. They are and should be words held in the highest regard. Sacred? Maybe they should be. Too many people seem to easily forget them when times are hard, rather than do as my friend said. Hard times are when our vows are most important. They should be a comfort and a beacon. I read about couples forced now to be home with each other. Many are not doing very well. They argue and fight about everything it seems. The don't know how to compromise and share. What a shame that is. But also, for many the opposite is true as well. It has been for tim and I. We talk more, laugh more. We can be quiet together, each of us doing our own thing. Being locked down together since March 2020 has been good for our relationship. Though, it hasn't been walk in the park. tim struggles with depression and that has hit hard sometimes during 'Covid'. But he has held on and worked through it. Taking time to care for himself. If you're in a committed relationship and you made vows to each other and you find you are struggling, look back at that day, remember the look in your beloved's eyes and the words you said to them and they to you. Say them again each day in your heart. Mean them. Relationships are work. The things we struggle for and work for offer the greatest reward. That love you share is worth it, everyday.

On GA we have a great and friendly community. I've enjoyed my time here. I have met some wonderful people. I accept these people for who they are here, online. I use my real first name, Michael or Mike. I do not share my real surname here or on my email address. I believe in privacy. People can accept that or not. The majority I have met, do. The internet is a tool. It has much to offer and much to answer for. We need to be careful online and respectful of others. Much can befall people who are not careful. This goes especially for your personal information. To be liked and successful online, do not ask for private details, do not share yours. Don’t give people too much information about your job or your employer or school. You do not have to meet people in person no matter what they tell you or say. Watch your privacy settings on Facebook, and other social media. If you choose to meet someone, be careful. Never meet in private, never give your home address, make sure someone knows where you are and have a set time for them to call you to confirm you are okay. Be smart and be safe. If people want things from you ... money, information or anything that makes you uncomfortable, and saying no, I’m not comfortable with that does not stop them or satisfy them, then you may have to walk away. Anyone calling you friend, will understand and be happy with the relationship you have within your own personal boundaries. If they are not, if they draw a line in the sand expecting you to tell them everything to keep them a friend, then they were never your friend and do not deserve you in their life. Keep safe online. Enjoy your friends. Trust them, until you have reason not to. So this is a two-for-one blog ... you lucky people!!! (insert a laugh here) Love The world outside is hard and tiresome. We work, drive and slog through everyday living looking forward to going home when our duties are done. Home is a refuge for most of us. It is for me. It was when I was single, even more so now with my husband, tim. Millions of songs have said it … you are my everything, my reason. And tim is to me. When I step inside our apartment and close the world out behind me. There he is. All I want and all I need. I love him, like no other. Each day I am grateful to have what I do in my life. Tell those you love and care for how you feel. Share that because it is what the world and we all, need now. Thanks for reading.