A Page out of the Book of Jordan - 1. Chapter 1

A loud bang echoed through the apartment, soon followed by a fit of giggles. The door slammed shut, causing the furniture and the floor below it to rattle. Another giggle and the high pitch squeal of a girl punctured the air. I groaned inwardly, trying my best to ignore the couple and maintain my focus on the words that stretched across the pages. Werewolves, Matt. Ignore those idiots. However the sloppy sound of lips smacking made the endeavor quite difficult. If they could be obnoxious, so could I.

I continued to read, beginning to recite the words aloud, “Though a moment before Bertrand's hands had itched to be at the man's throat, they made no move to seize and hold his prey--” Someone groaned loudly, interrupting the purposeful monologue. My fingers tightened around the edges of the book. Cranking the volume of my voice up another notch, I continued. “The tension was not in his limbs but in his face, in the masseter muscles of his jaws. His mouth had opened--”

I was cut off by a back colliding with my head and then another groan. The two had somehow managed to make it all the way into the living without coming up for air. They'd also decided to use the couch for support. Unfortunately, I was still sitting there. Disgusted by their total disregard, but not completely beaten, I kept going. “His mouth had opened wide. His teeth had dug through cloth and flesh. His face was inundated with a warm fountain, which he licked at greedily-- Oh, for fuck's sake! Will you guys get off of me?!”

Relenting, I threw my book onto the table. “God, I can't get through one damn book in this place.”

Jordan finally pried his lips away from his date, a grin plastered across his face. “Hey, you challenged- I accepted. Besides, that part about the teeth and licking was kinda hot, Matt.” The girl giggled again, although I don't think she'd actually heard a single word I'd said while they were making out.

Glare. “I'm reading about people's throats getting ripped out, yet you think it's kinda hot? You're fucking sick.” Glancing over to unknown girl-A, I gave an earnest blessing. “Good luck, he might bite to draw blood now.”

One of her hands caressed it's way down Jordan's arm, the girl practically purring. “I like a little kink every once in a while.”

Ha, she thinks I'm joking. Jordan's weird like that. He would. Well, now I know to ignore any blood curdling screams coming from the bedroom. After all...she likes a little kink. Picking my book back up, I shrugged. “Your skin, not mine.”

Jordan leaned in and kissed her again, before whispering something into her ear. She made a sound that (I assume) meant she was pleased by whatever he'd suggested. Patting me on the shoulder, he made his departure known. I paid him no mind, stretching my legs across the couch. But before I could get back into the book, it occurred to me that Jordan and his sexcapades could get pretty loud at times. Craning my neck over to look at the clock on the wall, I frowned. It was too late to go to anywhere else. Hm. What to do, what to do...Ah.

I reached forward for the remote, fingers inching it closer until I could pick it up. After hitting the power button, I flipped through the channels. The general opinion I held when it came to television... was that it sucked. It was only good for two things- cartoons and background noise. I settled on Cartoon Network, grateful that something recognizable was on. Sometimes I really questioned some of the crap they aired late night. Contented, I nestled back into the cushions and began to read again. Surprisingly enough, I didn't hear another peep out of the two. Which was more than fine by me. Instead, the minutes passed by as I immersed myself into the blissful world of fiction.

Then a shriek pierced my bubble.

Smacking the book to my face, I instantly knew what had happened. The sound of stumbling and thudding came from Jordan's room. Shortly after, the door flew open with a bang. Eyes peering over the top of my book, I turned to watch the drama unfold.

“You freak, what the fuck?!” the hysterical girl screamed, still in the process of pulling her shirt back on.

“You said you liked kinky every once in a while,” Jordan insisted, not looking the least bit apologetic. Fighting the smile itching to surface, I held my tongue. Jordan took a step toward her, pants still unbuckled. “C'mon, I'm sorry. I won't do it again.”

“Don't come near me!” she continued to screech. “I'm out of here. Go find yourself a hooker or something.”

“Oh come on, I can do better than a hooker,” Jordan said, arms folding across his chest. He seemed so offended by the notion of having to pay for sex. Leave it to Jordan to care more about that, than the fact that he'd clearly upset the poor girl.

“Whatever, it just won't be me.” Those were the last words said before she stormed out of our apartment, door slamming behind her.

Heaving a sigh, Jordan walked over to the couch. He nudged my legs out of the way to make a place for himself. He then plopped himself down to the cushions, causing everything to bounce in turn. I curled my knees up and shifted my body slightly, less than excited about sharing my space. But with the apartment quiet again, at least I had a higher probability of finishing my book. After a few minutes of silence, Jordan ruined that hope. Throwing his head back against the couch, he groaned. “Aw, man. I'm still horny.”

“Yeah, well maybe you should've considered that before you took a bite outta crime,” I replied, turning the page.

I could actually see Jordan make a face in response, out of the corner of my eye. “I thought she'd be okay with it. She said she was, didn't she?”

The question was rhetorical. So, I didn't answer. Another minute of silence passed. I turned the page. “What did ya bite anyway?”

“Her nipple.”

I placed the book down against my stomach, amusement written all over my face. “Dude, you tried to bite off her nipple?”

“Not bite off,” he grumbled, idly examining his hands. “I just bit... hard.”

“Hard enough to draw blood,” I said with mild disbelief.

“No... I didn't draw blood.”

“Almost?”

“I guess.”

“You are unbelievable.” It was a phrase I said quite often when it came to Jordan. Lifting my book again, I shook my head. “You're lucky she didn't castrate you.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

It got quiet again.

The image however didn't leave my head. I couldn't help it. I chuckled, flipping to another page. “I can't believe you tried to chew off her nipple.”

“Oh, c'mon! How was I suppose to know she'd freak out,” he said, straightening up. “I mean really! I thought girls liked it when you did stuff with their nipples.”

An eyebrow raised as I glanced over, throwing him an incredulous look. “Yeah, and I'm sure you like it when someone plays with your balls. But I don't think you'd want them bitten off.”

He opened his mouth to argue, then closed it again. “True.” Slumping back against the couch, he began to whine. “But I'm still horny.”

“Tough shit. What do you expect me to do about it?” I sighed. Flip. Though it got quiet again, I knew the conversation had not come to a close. I got the distinct feeling I was still being watched. He was waiting for me to look at him again. It continued to nag until I finally gave up. I lifted my head and took the bait. “What?”

Jordan's smile swept across his face, a dimple surfacing on his left cheek. Like a cat on the prowl, he crawled closer. With his intentions clear, I brought my foot up and gave him a face full of sock. My eyes turned back to the book. “No.”

“But, Matt,” he said, a pout forming on his face. “Why not?”

“Just because you fuck everything that moves, doesn't mean I do,” I replied evenly, right foot still keeping him at bay. “If you're that horny, go to a bar or something.”

“Fine.”

Feeling the pressure ease up, I let my leg relax again. His fingers began to drum against the back of the couch. With each 'thump', my aggravation only grew. One book. That's all I wanted. One. Damn. Book. I knew what he was doing. We've been friends for years-- since the sandbox. Jordan definitely understood that he was annoying me. At the same time, I understood he would continue to. Twenty years of being glued at the hip taught me one thing. Jordan was persistent with a capital 'P'. The only way to counter this, was with a staunch refusal to acknowledge him.

“Hey, Matt?”

I ignored him.

“Matt?”

Again.

He tried a third time, beginning to sound a little disheartened. “Matty?”

I turned another page.

“You know, I hate it when you do this.”

The couch bounced again as he pushed himself up. I listened to the swishing of socked feet against the hardwood, Jordan shuffling back to his room in defeat. When I heard his door click shut, I finally exhaled. Moments like these weren't uncommon. His needling had begun shortly after he first discovered the joy of sex in high school. Needless to say, Jordan also wasn't too discriminating. Male or female, his desires led him which ever way he could go. With a million dollar smile and a misleading pair of baby blues, it wasn't too difficult for him to get what he wanted either.

My thoughts were interrupted by a sudden weight on my head. With his chin planted against my crown, Jordan's arm came up to motion at the book. “Is it really that interesting?”

“Yes. It's a cult classic actually, 'The Werewolf of Paris'. Maybe you should try to read it sometime.”

“Okay.”

He walked back around the couch and sat again. This time a lot closer. Leaning his cheek to my shoulder, he actually went quiet. I was a little...surprised. “Are you reading over my shoulder?”

His head bobbed up and down, moving the sleeve of my shirt with him. “Yep.”

“That's kind of...annoying.”

“Will you have sex with me?”

“No.”

“Alright then, shut up.”

I did. I suppose this is better than having to spend the night fighting him off. But still. In all my years of knowing him, not once had he taken an interest in any of my books. Or books period. It made me curious. The question remained even as the minutes passed. Eventually, I voiced it. Tilting my face to the side, I looked at him. “Why?”

“Why, what?” he asked, eyes still moving across the page.

“Why did you decide to read with me?”

He sniffed. “I figured it had to be good since you like it. You're always reading and stuff. So, maybe reading is more interesting than I thought.”

The answer was simple. Intriguing, especially for Jordan. Who would have thought he'd ever give up pursuing sex in favor of literature. Not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, I turned my attention back to the novel. We spent the rest of the night quietly reading 'The Werewolf of Paris'.