Best And Worst of Me - 2. Chapter 2

Quinn stared blankly at the upturned hand presented to him. Small, petite, and pale just like the rest of Lizzie. She expected to hold his hand? Quinn slid his larger hand over hers, looking away and biting his lip.

Lizzie giggled and started to drag him off in the opposite direction of his class. Apparently he was walking her to class too. She chatted the whole way and at some point there was an invitation to hang out the coming weekend. Quinn wasn’t listening.

“Quinn!” She barked outside her class.

“Huh?” Quinn snapped his attention back to the conversation. “What?”

“Do you want to go out on a date this weekend?” Lizzie repeated. Quinn shrugged helplessly. “I… guess.” Lizzie took that as a sure answer, and promised they would set up details closer to the weekend. Quinn nodded and saw her off to class, mingling in the halls after.

There was no way he could ever tell Lizzie that he wasn’t interested in her sexually, if at all. She wouldn’t take the news well, and there would be the issue of sex with her eventually. It seemed sooner rather than later; at the rate she was going.

Quinn couldn’t handle doing that again. It had happened once, during his freshman year, before he had figured anything out. Even she noticed something was off. It was too exposing, too… not right, that he had to think of another guy to get it up.

He struggled to get back to his own class, with another strong wave of hopelessness and dread taking over his chest. Gritting his jaw, Quinn just opted to skip his next class. He would hear for it when he got home, but…

Instead he went out the back doors of the school and found an out of sight corner, sinking down and curling up. Quinn cradled his head in his hands, elbows rested on his knees and trying to clear his head. He pulled out his iPod and scrolled to Blood on the Dance Floor again. He skipped the rest of his morning classes and went out for lunch, happy to avoid Lizzie for the morning. Quinn waited in line for his order, glad to be there before the rest of the lunch rush that was only minutes behind him.

First in were Cameron and his boyfriend, with a girl in their group. Quinn watched from his place in line, with two adults separating them. Cameron and his boyfriend were holding hands. They did that so easily, while Quinn would rather chew off his own arm than hold hands with Lizzie. Not that he would admit it.

Quinn stalled when Cameron met his eyes, making him look away quickly. Daring to glance back, Quinn could see Cameron whisper something in the other boy’s ear. What was he saying? Complaining about Quinn or… hell, even flirting? Quinn scowled and glared holes into the menu ahead of him. He ordered his food to go, not wanting to bother with watching Cameron. He ate out in his car instead, iPod hooked up to the stereo and playing music with the windows down. He went with Seether, the song Fake It on repeat.

Cameron came out and loaded into a car with the other two, the girl was driving. Quinn watched them pull out to leave as he drug some fries through sauce.

Once he finished eating, Quinn drove back to the school and went into his next class. No one even questioned where he had been earlier in the morning, but he figured he would catch hell from Lizzie.

He joined Zach in the locker room for seventh period, appreciating the view as Cameron looked for his shirt. He was slim, with narrow hips that had a wonderful curve leading down to the swell of his ass.

Cameron still hadn’t found his shirt, and Zach was trying to bite back a laugh. Quinn glanced up to Zach. “Did you do something with it?”

“Soaked it in the showers.” Zach grinned. “It’s on the floor in there.”

Quinn looked down and slipped into his shoes. That was disgusting, to leave his shirt on the shower floor. Zach left, casting one more glance at Cameron who had opted to use his regular shirt rather than a work out shirt. Too proud to ask or admit that someone had taken his other shirt.

Quinn finished with his shoes and headed for the door. “It’s in the showers,” He mumbled, not looking at Cameron as he walked by.

Cameron darted off deeper into the locker room, and Quinn joined the rest of the class in the weight room. Quinn waited by the bench press, stretching his arms over his head. Cameron snuck in and came right over, wiping his hands on the thighs of his shorts.

“Find it?” Zach jeered from across the room. Cameron sent a glare over his shoulder and said nothing.

“Least you could do was do it after school,” Quinn complained. “If he’s late then I have to wait, you know.”

Zach shrugged and Cameron dipped his head down. Quinn loaded discs onto the bar and slid his back onto the bench. It was probably pointless that Cameron spotted at all—the kid couldn’t even press half what Quinn could.

Quinn made a mental note not to ever mess up, then.

He switched with Cameron, watching as the younger boy took off some of the weights. “I don’t see why you even signed up for this class,” Quinn muttered distastefully.

Cameron kept his eyes down. “My friend and I signed up together, but he got it in second period.”

“Your boyfriend, you mean?” Quinn corrected him harshly. Cameron bit his lip and didn’t reply. But if they had signed up together… that happened the prior year, early second semester. Had they been together that long?

Quinn stood at Cameron’s head, in front of the bench. He glanced down to Cameron’s chest, trying to read the band name that was on his shirt. All Quinn could make out were a bunch of guys wearing masks with some weird symbol.

Once the coach dismissed them, Cameron made an obvious effort to get back to the locker room first. He changed out and was gone before anyone could snatch more of his things.

Quinn started to change into his clothes for practice, but Zach urged him to get dress and go out into the commons. Begrudgingly, Quinn followed Zach out, only to get Lizzie complaining about not seeing him that morning.

“Where were you? I waited outside my classes for you.” She huffed. Quinn didn’t even know where most of her classes were, but somehow she was expecting that.

“I wasn’t feeling well…” Quinn said. It wasn’t a complete lie.

Lizzie made a face and cupped the side of his cheek with her hand. “Aw. Are you going to practice?”

“Yeah, I have to.” Quinn forced a smile, eyes moving past her and to… Cameron. Quinn locked in on him, even for the only brief second before he was out of sight. He’d been with his boyfriend again. Well, of course. They were dating. They wanted to spend time together.

Quinn looked back down to Lizzie. He did not want to spend time with her, and even if he didn’t feel up to practice, Lizzie was the alternative. “I’ll have to struggle through it.” Quinn added. “We need to beat Dakota for the homecoming game.”

Lizzie rolled her eyes and smiled. “Of course, sweetie.” Sweetie? Was he sweetie now? Quinn excused himself when he caught sight of Zach heading for the locker rooms.

One of the freshmen was absent from practice, but everyone else showed up. It was a cooler day with mild cloud cover that spared them some heat, but it still had to be in the eighties. Quinn focused on the strain of his muscles rather than the bodies around him.

Practice ended later than it was supposed to, and Quinn rinsed down in the showers. Zach pulled a prank on some of the freshmen boys. They took it all in stride, even chucking some of their sweaty clothes at Zach for payback.

Quinn left before Zach and some of the others. He got into his car, and started up his music. He took his time home, knowing there would be a lecture. The school’s automated attendance system had probably already made the call home.

He was greeted by a storm of fury from his father, asking about what had been so important to miss his classes. “I wasn’t feeling well.” Quinn fed the same half-truth he had given Lizzie. That wasn’t enough to satisfy, and the lecture continued for a good few minutes before his father collapsed into his recliner in the den.

Quinn shrugged and looked for something to get himself out of the hole. “I got a girlfriend.” His dad had been asking for a while now, since Quinn hadn’t dated a girl since the previous year…far too long, in his father’s opinion.

“Oh?” He perked up at the mention. “She pretty?”

Quinn forced another smile. “Yeah, in the petite kind of way. She’s one of the cheerleaders.”

His father kept that conversation running until Quinn confessed it had only been two days and he didn’t know that much about Lizzie. That seemed to help blow over the trouble of him skipping a class. After that Quinn holed up in his bedroom until dinner.

Quinn’s younger sister was absent from the table, staying at a friends house and so the table was quiet. She did most of the talking in the family. Quinn’s mother chatted briefly about her day at work and some surprise fire drill they had. Quinn just nodded and smiled, tolerating his family for the rest of the evening.

His parent’s disappeared off to bed, and Quinn snuck the family laptop up into his room. He feigned sleep for a few minutes just to be sure before powering up the machine and punching in the keys. Explicit images assaulted his eyes, and he glanced self-consciously at the door. Doing this late at night, as rare as it happened, always put him on edge of being caught.

Quinn tracked down one of his favorite videos and slipped his pajama pants and boxers down to his thighs. Hand fisted firmly around his shaft, Quinn started up the video.

It started with a simple but enthusiastic blowjob on the man who would top. It escalated from there into rimming and fingering before the smaller man threw his head back and was filled. As wanton as the actor was, he had the same black hair and thin body frame as Cameron.

Quinn grunted and closed his eyes. Was that why he was so attracted to Cameron? He was Quinn’s type.

He sighed and opened his eyes back up to the video, tightening the moving hand on his shaft. The young actor was hauled up from his hands and knees position to sit on the other’s lap, back to chest. A few powerful hip thrusts and both the young actor and Quinn were releasing. Quinn shuddered and kept pace until the last drop had been squeezed out. He wiped himself down with a tissue, deleted his computer history, and returned the laptop to downstairs. Then he fell stomach-down into bed, face buried in the pillow.

***

The following week came with the homecoming game. It wasn’t even at their school, but at the county stadium fifteen minutes from the school. Quinn warmed up on the field with the rest of the team, and their school’s side of the stands all dressed in black for the blackout theme.

The opposing high school had gone with a purple-out. Quinn chuckled at the idea of having to wear purple shirts, and wondered how many guys wouldn’t lower themselves to something like that. No one complained of the colors red, black, and silver.

Quinn was one of the starters on the field. He could see Lizzie off to the side, pointedly cheering louder than all the other girls in their short little red skirts with silver trim and black insignia on the chest. He looked away and waited for the plays to start at the lead of their quarter back, Sam.

Countless plays followed, all lasting only seconds with minute long intervals in between. Quinn was replaced and went to the bench, not at all disappointed. He had played well and was tired, so give the junior a chance.

He looked up into the stands, looking for his parents and sister and his sister’s new boyfriend. They had yet to meet, but the younger teen was definitely getting a talking to soon. Before Quinn could find the pocket of his family in the crowd, he saw Cameron.

Cameron was with his own group of friends, including his boyfriend and the girl from lunch the other week. He didn't look at all happy to be there, and it seemed at times was actually cheering for the other school whenever Zach played.

Why was he there, if he didn't like so many of the players?

Quinn turned back around to watch the field and let himself pretend Cameron was there for him. He could probably cheer louder than Lizzie, without all the hopping and clapping. Maybe he’d even give one of those kisses after winning a game.

Like that would ever happen.

Quinn took another look up into the stands, Cameron shoving shoulders with some others. Laughing, but not really paying attention to the game, and probably not Quinn.

Quinn got called back out onto the field for the last quarter. So maybe Cameron wasn’t there to see him or even cheer on the same team, but Quinn still let himself pretend that Cameron was watching now. Watching as Quinn intercepted, watching later as by some mistake he got the ball and ran in a touch down that made the score even. Zach, of course, got that last field goal kick that put them one point ahead. After that, the last few minutes were of hard defense, trying to keep the score as it was for the end.

The crowd dressed in black exploded when the time was called, having beaten the school’s second rival. Quinn immediately sought out Cameron again, hopeful, but the teen was either lost in the moving crowd or gone.

Quinn deflated but left his smile up for Lizzie. She gave him a passionate, tongue involved kiss there at the end, making Quinn almost bite her tongue out of shock. Hell, they hadn’t even kissed regularly yet. But he forced himself to go with it, until he heard his father hooting from the railings over there heads.

Quinn threw his best cocky grin up at the man, then a warning look at his sister’s boyfriend. No way he was escaping without their ride home—he was a middle school student. Quinn would press the little twerp into the car door on the way home.

He finished up with the team on the field and had a quick meeting. Quinn changed his clothes and left the locker room to locate his family in the parking lot. Still, he looked around for Cameron, or at least the car Cameron might have come in that the girl drove, but nothing was there.

Quinn found his parents and their car. He was forced into taking a window seat instead of sitting between his sister and the new boyfriend. Quinn let his head rest on the window, looking out and drifting off.

Cameron probably hated him. Maybe he had gone to the game to wish for a losing game on the teammates that gave him hell in school, but had left early because they were winning.

Quinn got a text from Lizzie confirming their weekend plans the next day. He didn't want to, especially after what happened on the field. A kiss like that left more to come, more that he did not want to do. It didn’t disgust him so much as he just… wasn’t motivated to do anything about it. No offer from a girl made him jump for a chance at something physical.

“I saw you with your girlfriend,” His sister chided from a safe distance on the other side of the car. Quinn sat forward and glared at her.

“And I see you kiss like that, I will rip your tongue out,” He said the later to the now pale boyfriend.

“Got it,” He croaked out.

“Mom!” His sister cried out. “Quinn’s scaring him!”

“Damn right,” Quinn’s father grunted protectively. “I second that motion.”

“Roy!” Their mother finally joined in with a slap on her husband’s arm. The typical banter consisted for the ride home, and Quinn fell silent of it.

Quinn was first in the door and first up the stairs into his room. He showered and changed into sweatpants and a t-shirt, throwing himself listlessly onto his bed. He stared at the ceiling for a moment before sitting up and digging out the previous year’s yearbook. He turned to the freshman class; vaguely remembering that Cameron’s last name began with a W. Quinn found the page and traced his finger over the photo. His hair was shorter, and if it was possible, he looked thinner than he was now.

Quinn dog-eared the page, right as his mother gave a short knock and came into his room. Quinn slammed the yearbook shut quickly, guiltily, and stuffed it back onto his shelf.

“You okay baby?” His mom asked softly.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” Quinn leaned back on his hands, trying to look casual. He had not just been mooning over the picture of another boy.

“You sure came up here awful fast. You aren’t upset about anything?” She continued her smile, hopeful that he would talk to her. “Not upset. Just wanted to shower.” Quinn jerked a thumb towards his bathroom.

His mother nodded and looked around the room for a distraction. “Alright then,” She concluded and stepped back out into the hall, shutting the door behind her.

Quinn sighed and dropped his head in defeat.