Webs - 2. Chapter 2

Dmitri’s eyes snapped open.

“You told me you’d never slept with a woman!” Garret accused, raising his voice.

“I didn’t.” Dmitri responded, a little more testily than he might have if he weren’t just waking up.

“Then why does this child think you’re his father?” Garret asked, his voice still accusatory.

“It’s … complicated,” Dmitri answered, sitting up and scooting back on the bed.

“Well, you’d better start explaining, because when I told you I didn’t ever want to have kids, I meant it.”

“Oh come on, Garret, don’t be that way.” Dmitri said, shaking his head.

“I don’t want the responsibility, Dmitri. I will not be taking care of a child from some floozy you knocked up years ago!”

Dmitri’s eyes narrowed. He didn’t like the way this conversation was going, and he didn’t like the vulnerable feeling he had, being interrogated while naked in bed. He rolled out from under the blankets and started putting on the clothes he’d worn the night before. “Garret, please listen to me, its not how you think?”

“Then how is it, Dmitri? He is your kid isn’t he? I haven’t heard you deny that.”

Taking a breath and trying to figure out the best way to answer, Dmitri responded, “He’s my responsibility for now and that’s what matters alright.”

“Oh you better have a better explanation than that and you better explain why you lied to me about never being with a woman and if you think for one moment that I’m okay with him staying here, you are dead fucking wrong, so you call up whatever whore you spawned him with and tell her to take him back, now!” Garret yelled.

“Hey! Cool it with the insults, would you? You don’t know what’s going on and you have no business calling people whores when you don’t even know them!” Dmitri shot back angrily.

“You still have feelings for the bitch, don’t you?” Garret said accusingly. Dmitri hesitated and before he could answer Garret continued “God damn it, you do! I can see it in your eyes! You son of a bitch! How could you do this to me?”

“If you would give me a chance to answer…” Dmitri couldn’t even finish the sentence as Garret was too busy slapping him to hear what he said over the resounding sound of smack, echoing off the walls and leaving a hand print on the side of Dmitri’s cheek.

“What the hell, man?” Dmitri’s patience was quickly coming to an end. Garret could be kind of temperamental sometimes but this was over the top, even for him. Yes, Dmitri knew that Garret didn’t want kids, and yes it was probably wrong to not even consult Garret before taking in a child, but Dmitri thought Garret was severely over-reacting. After all, if anyone had a right to be angry at Sabin, it was Dmitri, not Garret, and whatever feelings Dmitri had for Sabin were all mixed with resentment and contempt.

“I have never, ever cheated on you, and no, I have never slept with a woman and I’m not going to go back with the mother of that child, because she was never my girlfriend in the first place. The mother of that child is the deceitful bitch who stole an old boyfriend of mine.”

Garret paused for a minute, then in a soft voice that sounded full of shock “You still care about him, don’t you!”

“If you would stop being jealous for just a minute…” another slap echoed off the walls, this one on the other side of Dmitri’s face.

“Damn it! Garret… I have never raised a hand to you and if you pull that shit on me one more god damned time you are going to lose me, do you understand that?”

Garret looked at him with still more shock in his eyes. “No! You can’t leave me, Dmitri, I love you!”

“Really, Garrret? Because you have a funny way of showing it.”

“But you love someone else.” Garret practically pouted, eyeing Dmitri angrily.

“It’s more complicated than that. I…” Again, Dmitri was interrupted, as Garret began yelling again.

“What’s so complicated about it, huh? I trusted you, I slept with you, and you told me you loved me, but you’re really in love with someone else… and if he ever came back to you, you’d dump me for him in a heartbeat, wouldn’t you!?”

“No, I wouldn’t! This is bullshit Garret. What the fuck is the matter with you? You’ve been in relationships before, I don’t freak out about that!”

“This is different! You’re taking his kid!”

“Yeah. I am.” Dmitri was fed up with this. “I am taking his kid, because I care about the kid. He’s the son I never got to have, and to hell with you if you think for one moment I’m going to kick the kid out because of your asinine insecurities.”

“I told you I didn’t ever want to raise kids. You know that.” Garret answered, contemptuously, but with some shame in his voice.

“This isn’t a permanent arrangement, Garret, just until my ex can get some stuff squared away at home.”

“What kinds of ‘stuff?’” Garret asked.

“He didn’t specify,” Dmitri half-lied. Dmitri knew Sabin thought Aaron was being abused but didn’t know what Sabin was going to do about it.

“Why didn’t you ask me about it before taking in the kid?”

“You were asleep, it was the middle of the night, and I forgot.” Dmitri half-lied once again. Dmitri knew Garret could be the fiercely jealous sort and wasn’t about to wake him up in the middle of the night to deal with something like Sabin showing up with a child. It was all Dmitri could do that night to handle it himself, and there was no way he had the mental energy to think about all the issues Sabin brought with him and reign in a jealous, hostile Garret at the same time. Even fully awake, he would never have been able to deal with both of them.

“You’re so full of shit, Dmitri. You know that?” Garret said, launching into another verbal attack. Dmitri really didn’t have a defense against that, Garret was absolutely right. The other reason why Dmitri didn’t wake Garret up and bring him into the decision on whether to take in Aaron was because, as far as Dmitri was concerned, it was not up for debate. He would not turn the boy he considered a son out no matter how uncomfortable Garret was with the idea of taking him in. As Garret wrapped up another round of red-faced insults, Dmitri took stock of the situation and, realizing there was little point to indulging Garret’s temper any further, tried to bring it to an end.

“Look Garret, quit being such a self-centered asshole for a moment and think about what is going on here. You know me to be a caring person. I was not going to turn out a child no matter how uncomfortable it makes you feel. How about you show an ounce of maturity, pull your head out of your ass, and think for just a god-damned minute about this instead of just reacting non-stop, will you? I love you, you know that. You know I’ve always wanted kids, and you know I’ve never done anything to pursue that, because I know you don’t want kids. This is a temporary arrangement, a chance for me to be a dad for a while, a chance I may never get again. Can’t you consider my feelings for a minute and let me have this? I give, and give and give…” Just when Dmitri started to get through to Garret, those last few words set him off again.

“Oh and I suppose you get nothing in return?” Garret interrupted. “I spend night after night in that bed with you fulfilling your desires, and this is the kind of thanks I get? What about my feelings, Dmitri? And what is it you think you give that’s so important anyway? You love me? Bullshit. So you make me breakfast and do the laundry, big deal, that ain’t nothin special.”

“Garret you can’t be serious…. Do you hear yourself!?” Dmitri really was surprised at this turn in the conversation.

“You fucked him last night didn’t you, you son of a bitch?” Garret said out of nowhere.

“Are you kidding me? No!” Dmitri answered, incensed at the question.

“Look me in the eyes and tell me you your lips didn’t meet his last night.” On this Dmitri hesitated, after all Sabin did kiss him, but that moment’s hesitation was all it took to trigger another outburst from Garret. “You did! You kissed him! You son of a bitch… I can’t believe you!”

“It wasn’t like that!” Dmitri pleaded.

“Yeah then how was it, huh? Was it good? Was it worth it you cheating piece of shit?”

“Look, he kissed me alright, just before he left, and he did it quick before I could stop him and then he was gone.

“Yeah, right.”

“Hey, listen to me. I love you. I’ve never, ever cheated on you. Get that through your head, now, because I will not tolerate you accusing me of that again, you got it?”

“Yeah, fuck you. You don’t care about me, you don’t respect my feelings, you didn’t even see fit to wake me up, when you decided to take in a child -who isn’t even yours, by the way!- I don’t care what you say... you aren’t his father and you’re never going to be.” Garret retorted, striking a nerve in Dmitri and earning an angry response.

“Oh grow up! You ask me to respect your feelings and this is how you treat mine? I give you my all, Garret and this is how you treat me in return? Show some appreciation for once, would you?”

“Oh please,” Garret said, rolling his eyes. “So-you give-me your-all. Big deal, your all ain’t that great.”

“How can you say that, Garret? After everything I’ve done for you?”

“Oh please, it’s not like it matters. I could get anyone I want.”

Dmitri found himself wondering when Garret had become such a jerk. Had Garret always been this way? How had Dmitri not seen it?

“Fine, then, why don’t you go out and try it?” Dmitri finally answered.

“What?”

“You say you can have anyone you want, you don’t need me, then how about you go ahead and leave?” Dmitri answered an increasingly confused Garret.

“Are you serious? You can’t throw me out, I pay rent!”

“I’m not throwing you out of the apartment, just out of my bed.

“You know you’re going to miss me on those lonely nights,” was Garret’s answer. “It won’t be long before you come back looking for my cock.” Garret was probably right about lonely nights, but Dmitri was not the sort to be aroused by hostility, and at this point, he was far too angry to care about sex.

“Oh please, you aren’t that good in bed, Garret. I think I’m the only guy who’s ever had to fake an orgasm.” Dmitri said, hitting Garret somewhere Dmitri knew he was vulnerable. Garret was always sensitive about his ability to perform. It was a low blow, sure, but well-deserved at this point.

“Fine, I’ll move back into the other room and the kid will have to sleep on the couch in the living room. I pay rent, so I’m higher up the ladder,” Garret said.

Dmitri found himself mentally wondering if Garret was really that dense. The answer seemed to be yes.

“Guess again, Garret.” Dmitri told him. “Aaron gets the room his stuff is in; you get the couch till you get out, or come to your senses.”

“Didn’t you hear what I said, Dmitri? I pay rent, so I’m entitled to a room.” Garret said smugly.

“Not if I say you’re not,” Dmitri said in a dangerously low voice.

“Fuck you! You can’t do that!” Sabin’s eyes were wide.

“Would you prefer to leave altogether?” Dmitri asked.

“I can’t believe you’re dumping me for a kid, and he’s not even your’s, you moron.” Garret paused for a minute, looking around. “Where is the little bastard anyway?”

“That’s it! Take a walk, go talk to a friend, or just do whatever you want, but you need to give yourself some time to cool off and think about everything before you say anything else you’ll regret.”

“Yeah, I’m going, and you’re going to regret it.” Garret said. “I’m worth a lot more than some kid, you know? I wish you could see that.”

“It doesn’t have to be this way if you would just pull your head out of your ass!” Dmitri said, hoping Garret might finally come to his senses. “If you just cool it, you can still live with me, we can still be together, and Aaron can be here too…”

“I don’t want to take care of a kid, Dmitri. I won’t take care of him. I don’t want anything to do with the little bastard child of some fuckwad you banged once.”

“That’s it, just get out. Just get the fuck out! I don’t want you living here with me, and I don’t want you around Aaron if this is the kind of behavior and mentality you’re going to have. Just get the fuck out of here until you come to your senses. I don’t want to see you in here anymore. Just… out!”

“You can’t kick me out, just like that Dmitri, I do pay rent in case you’ve forgotten.”

“Yeah well, I guess it’s a good thing the lease is in my name, or did you forget how you insisted it be only my credit that got risked? You didn’t know it then, but I made sure when we got the place that I could afford the whole thing if I had to since it was in my name. That means I can throw you out, and I will if you don’t grab your shit and get out of my apartment. Now.”

Sensing he’d pushed Dmitri too far and Dmitri was not going to budge, Garret grabbed a suit case and filled it with his clothes, while Dmitri watched. Pretty much everything in the apartment was owned by Dmitri, since he worked while Garret went to college. His clothes packed, Garret grabbed his laptop and stuck it in his computer bag. He looked up at Dmitri, still watching him from the bedroom door, making sure Garret didn’t steel anything. “So this is it, then? We’re through after this, you know that right?” Garret asked in a half hearted attempt to get Dmitri to change his mind. Dmitri just nodded his head, turned around and disappeared down the hallway. Garret followed him to find him standing next to the apartment door, holding it open. “I still can’t believe you’d choose a kid over me.” Dmitri just snorted and tossed his head toward the open door.

“Out. Now,” were Dmitri’s last words to him, and Garret walked out the door. Dmitri closed it behind him, then leaned his back up against it and held his head in his hands, sliding down into a crouching position. “That couldn’t have gone any more badly if I tried,” he whispered to himself. Still, he knew that keeping Garret around if that’s the way he was going to be would have never worked out. He kept wondering how he could have actually thought he loved someone who could be such an ass. Sure, he knew that Garret was always emotionally needy and insecure, but to react like this? Dmitri had never expected it to go this badly. Dmitri took in a few deep breaths, releasing them slowly and pushing away all the stress from the argument. For a moment, he actually longed to be with Sabin again, something he hadn’t done in a long time. He really did still love that man, even after all these years. There were so many things he wished had been different. He shouldn’t be living with some jerk that was so insecure he was actually jealous of the child. He should have been with the man he loved, the man he knew cared about raising children… the man who was the father of the child he was now charged with. He should have been raising this child, happily, with the man he truly loved.

It was the sound of soft sobbing that shook Dmitri from his thoughts about the emotionally turbulent Garret. Dmitri turned, looking for the source of the crying, but didn’t see Aaron anywhere around. When the argument had begun, Aaron was sitting in the kitchen eating a bowl of cheerios. As Garret’s temper flared, his and Dmitri’s voices raised, and the verbal fight the two were having had spilled out into the hallway, through the kitchen, and eventually out the front door, Aaron had run from the kitchen for the nearest hiding place he could find – under Dmitri’s desk. It didn’t take long for Dmitri to find him there, and when he did, the sight of this poor child with tears running down his cheeks nearly broke Dmitri’s heart. Dmitri sighed, mentally kicking himself for not realizing what the fight would do to Aaron. Just how much did he overhear? “Damn it,” Dmitri thought, “He’s not even been here a day and already I’ve made him cry.”

Aaron was sitting under the desk, leaning his forehead into his arms, resting on his knees, pulled up to his chest, with tears running down his cheeks. When Dmitri appeared, pulling his chair out and kneeling down, Aaron tensed up and tried to hide deeper in his makeshift cave, afraid a beating was soon to come as they had so many times before when his mother was angry and took it out on him.

But Dmitri’s demeanor was entirely different from Aaron’s mom. He was not poised to attack Aaron or drag him out. He did not have fury in his eyes. Instead what Aaron saw there was no threat at all, only compassion, similar to Sabin but different in a way Aaron wasn’t sure of.

“Its okay, Aaron. It wasn’t your fault.” Dmitri told him, and Aaron sniffed and wiped the tears from his eyes.

“But… he was yelling about me, it’s my fault he’s mad, he doesn’t want nuthin to do with me!” Aaron squeaked out, sniffling some more.

“Don’t worry about Garret. He’ll come to his senses eventually, and if he doesn’t, then he’s just a dumb jerk, okay?” Dmitri said consolingly, trying to reassure the boy. Aaron seemed to have quit crying but was still a little unsure, like he didn’t want to leave his impromptu hiding place. This gave Dmitri an idea. “How would you like to finish your breakfast right here?” he asked, earning a grin and an excited nod from Aaron. This was something different. Aaron was beginning to like his new daddy. He was funny.

Dmitri went to the kitchen and found Aaron’s bowl of soggy cheerios had been spilled slightly, like someone had pushed the table suddenly and some of the cereal had over-spilled. It was easy to surmise how that happened. Dmitri sighed a bit, kicking himself some more for allowing Aaron to witness that disgusting fight. Dmitri cleaned up the mess and poured two fresh bowls of cheerios. When he returned to Aaron’s hiding spot with the two bowls in hand and a smile, Dmitri watched as Aaron’s face lit up.

“Thank you” Aaron said sweetly, as Dmitri handed him a bowl.

“Do you mind if I have breakfast with you? Dmitri asked, moving to sit on the floor in front of Aaron and earning another giggle and a ‘no’ from the boy.

The two of them sat there and ate their breakfast in relative quiet. Every now and then Dmitri would wink or make a funny face, earning more smiles from little Aaron. When they finished, Dmitri lifted his bowl to his mouth and drank the milk remaining there. To his amusement, Aaron copied him, dribbling a little from the corner of his mouth.

“Alright Kiddo,” Dmitri said with a bit of a laugh still in his voice, “Lets go put our bowls in the dishwasher, and after that, we can go to the park, does that sound good?”

Aaron smiled broadly, nodding enthusiastically. Dmitri was hoping for that kind of response. The two of them cleaned up and headed to the little park located on the grounds of the apartment complex. Aaron was both a little excited and a little scared of going to a park. He hadn’t ever been to one before. In fact, the only other kids his age he’d ever seen before were his cousins and they never wanted to play with him, always telling him he wasn’t good enough at the video games. He didn’t like his cousins much; they were always mean to him. The thought of meeting new kids had him a little worried… would they be nice? Still, it was exciting to be able to play outside. His mom never allowed him to, and Sabin, thanks to his line of work, wouldn’t ever risk Aaron being in public out of fear his enemies would do something to him.

Yet, even though Aaron was a little scared, he felt safe with his new daddy, Dmitri, which is why he was striding happily into the unknown world of the playground. He was a little disappointed when he got there because he didn’t see anyone else around, but even so; he had the whole playground to explore! Before Dmitri knew it, Aaron had taken off across the playground and was climbing the ladder to a slide.

Dmitri smiled, watching Aaron play, yelling his head off with glee like he’d never been to a park before. Of course, Aaron hadn’t ever been to a park before, but Dmitri didn’t know that. Aaron finished coming down the slide and began running back to Dmitri with a big grin on his face. “Come play with me!” he pleaded. Dmitri smiled and followed Aaron back to the slide, giving him a couple pushes and laughing, enjoying the glee that flowed from Aaron. After a couple times down the slide, Aaron stopped and got a funny look on his face and asked Dmitri innocently “How do you play on those?”

Dmitri looked where Aaron was pointing and, for a moment, was a bit confused. Had Aaron never seen a swing before? Apparently not, thought Dmitri, Well, I can certainly remedy that. He ran with Aaron over to the swings, told him to sit in one and hold on tight to the chains. A few moments later, squeals of delight could be heard throughout the playground.

Dmitri and Aaron continued to play, and eventually, they noticed someone else coming into the park, a woman who appeared to be in her mid twenties, with a little boy following close behind. The boy walked over to the jungle gym and ducked under it, playing in the sand. Dmitri could tell Aaron wanted to play with him but was feeling a little shy. Dmitri decided to urge Aaron on. “Go ahead over there and say ‘Hi’ to him, Aaron!” That seemed just the kind of encouragement he needed. Aaron ran up to the new boy, and from what Dmitri could see they seemed to hit it off pretty well. In the meantime, Dmitri decided to go introduce himself to the new boy’s mother, but she beat him to the punch.

“Hey there, stranger,” she said. “My name’s Trish. That’s my son, Dylan. I don’t think we’ve met before, have we?”

“No, I don’t think so. I’m Dmitri, and his name is Aaron,” Dmitri said, tilting his head toward the boy who was so quickly capturing his heart. “I don’t believe I’ve seen you around here before, Trish. Are you new?”

“We’re visiting my brother here for vacation. He’s been feeling kinda down lately, so I figured we’d take a trip and make good use of the fact that these apartments are just a few miles from the beach and all the attractions down there and see if I could cheer him up a bit.” Trish shook her head solemnly. “The poor guy’s been real lonely ever since his partner left him, but he’s too shy to go out and meet anyone.”

“I see,” Dmitri said, not adding anything.

“So is he yours?” Trish asked him.

“Huh?”

“The kid, silly, is he yours?”

“I’m looking after him for a while. His mother can’t take care of him right now” Dmitri said, still uncomfortable with calling Aaron his son.

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that, I hope she’s okay?” asked Trish with a measure of concern in her voice.

Probably wolfing down a box of Twinkies with her fat ass glued to her bed and her eyes to the television, was what Dmitri was thinking, but he knew he shouldn’t say that.

“I’m sure she’ll be fine,” he told Trish, carefully masking his contempt for the woman he still thought of as the bitch who stole the love of his life from him.

“So you and her are separated?” Trish asked, getting a laugh from Dmitri.

“It’s not like that,” he told her. “She and I were never together to begin with. I’m just helping out a friend.” He was only half lying. It was true Dmitri was never with Heather. In fact he found her physically repulsive and he wasn’t exactly helping out a friend. He didn’t know what he should call Sabin but friend didn’t really fit. “It wouldn’t have ever worked out between me and her.” Dmitri continued. “I’m gay.”

“Oh my god. You know what, I’m sorry… this is just too big a coincidence. You and Aaron have to come over for dinner with us tonight. I’ve got to introduce you to my brother Jeremy.”

Good lord, Dmitri thought. Within twenty four hours, I’ve gone from having a partner and no children, to having a kid and no partner, to now getting set up with the brother of a woman I just met. What’s next?