Webs - 3. Chapter 3

“Alright, we’re home. Let’s get you inside and put your bed together,” Dmitri said with an enthusiasm he was beginning to find common when he was talking to Aaron.

“Okay,” Aaron answered simply but with a happy tone in his voice. Having typically slept on a couch or on the floor, he hadn’t really had his own bed since he was in a crib. He was excited. After giving Aaron a couple hours’ time to play in the park with his new friend, Dmitri had taken him to a store to buy a bed for his room. To Aaron’s delight, Dmitri let him pick a blue race car bed. Dmitri was pleased with himself too; he’d always wanted a bed like that for himself but never got one. Thinking about that, he smirked to himself. He’d had Aaron for a day and already the vicarious living had begun.

Dmitri opened the back door of his red 2002 Chrysler Sebring LXI four door sedan and pulled out two sheets and a blanket wrapped in plastic. “Can you carry these?” he asked Aaron.

“Yep,” was all the response he received.

Dmitri handed Aaron the covers and closed the door before opening up the trunk and pulling out the box containing Aaron’s bed. It would have to be assembled once they got into the apartment, which was just as well since carrying the bed fully assembled up the stairs would have been quite a challenge. Aaron followed Dmitri up to the apartment complex, waiting as Dmitri paused, glancing to the western sky and seeing the sun gradually descending. There were only a few hours of light left.

Dmitri hated taking the elevator. Why miss out on easy exercise? Together, they marched up ten flights of stairs and, as could be expected, by the time they got to their floor they were both exhausted. Dmitri opened the door to their apartment, walked into the room that would be Aaron’s and set down the bed, then headed into the kitchen and poured a tall glass of water, finally plopping down on the couch to rest. Aaron mimicked him almost precisely, picking a smaller cup to drink from. After sipping their drinks quietly for a while, Dmitri looked right at Aaron and Aaron just stared right back at him. “Let’s go build you a bed,” Dmitri said.

“Let’s go build me a bed,” Aaron answered.

A sometimes frustrating hour later the bed was fully assembled and in the room that would be Aaron’s. The room still needed to be cleaned out a bit, and there was a lot of furniture that would have to be moved around to get the apartment set up the way Dmitri had in mind, but it was getting late and he could see Aaron was getting tired, so he was content to put sheets and a blanket on the mattress and tuck Aaron in. He only got as far as making the bed though before Aaron spoke up. “I’m hungry.”

Dmitri sat down in a bean bag chair and thought for a second. What kind of easy food could he make that would be liked by a kid?

“Okay, I’ve got it.” Dmitri said and stood up, leaving Aaron’s room and walking into the kitchen. He pulled out a pot and poured some water into it, then set it on the stove to get it boiling. It felt a little strange to him - having Aaron watch his every move from a seat at the bar. Garret had never cared and was simply content to eat whenever Dmitri finished cooking. Aaron, though, was watching curiously and intently. With the heat set to max in hopes of bringing the water to a boil quickly, Dmitri turned around and looked at Aaron, trying to think of what to do while waiting. “Do you like to draw, Aaron?”

“I dunno,” he answered. It was another thing he’d never really had the chance to do.

“Okay then, lets find out,” Dmitri said, and walked over to his desk, pulling out a couple pieces of paper and some coloring pencils. He walked back to where Aaron was sitting at the counter and placed a sheet of paper in front of each of them, then pulled out a pencil and started drawing. Dmitri knew he was not much good at drawing, but he assumed Aaron wouldn’t be too critical. It was something fun they could do while waiting for dinner. Dmitri decided to go with something fairly simple and started with the outline of what looked like a cursive “k” but added in some more details and a cartoon-looking rabbit soon took shape while Aaron watched. Seeing what Dmitri did, Aaron attempted to copy him - drawing a rabbit of his own while Dmitri checked the water and added macaroni noodles. When he came back, Aaron had already started coloring in his own picture and adding other things: some grass, and a sun. Dmitri was content just to watch his charge color in the picture until the noodles were soft enough. He drained the water, added some milk, the packet of cheese, a can of peas, and heated up a couple hot dogs in the microwave; then the two of them sat down at the table to eat.

“So, Aaron, tell me what it was like,” Dmitri paused a moment before continuing as Aaron met his gaze, “living with Sabin and Heather,” Dmitri finished. He didn’t fail to catch either the way Aaron’s eyes lit up at the mention of Sabin, or how they clouded over when Heather was mentioned.

“Daddy Sabin took care of me, but he was very busy,” Aaron answered, choosing to ignore the mention of Heather. He hated her and wished he could be with Sabin all the time, but while Sabin tried to make time for him and always treated him well, the business always seemed to occupy more of his time. Aaron always missed his daddy when he was stuck with Heather. Aaron didn’t know Heather was partly to blame, or that she had often told Sabin he could not see Aaron.

“I see,” Dmitri started. “Well, I’m sure he’s looking forward to seeing you again.” Aaron nodded somewhat absently. “What about your mom? Do you miss her?”

“No,” was all the verbal response Dmitri got, but Aaron’s tone told him more. Dmitri had suspected, years ago, that Heather was not good mother material, and the sound in Aaron’s voice and contempt on his face as he stabbed a hot dog slice with his fork told Dmitri he was right. Boys his age loved their mothers – unless, of course, they had neglectful or abusive mothers. Dmitri had no reason yet to think Heather was abusive but he was certain she had been neglectful and was beginning to wonder if there was more to it than that.

An awkward silence passed between them, though it was more awkward for Dmitri, who was unsure of how to improve Aaron’s mood. He could see it improve on its own, though, as they finished dinner, and Aaron seemed to have forgotten the mention of his mother as he finished the last few bites of his macaroni.

“I’ll tell you what, Aaron. How would you like to pick out any one of my books for me to read to you?” Aaron nodded his head in response to Dmitri, a big smile coming over his face. Sabin often read to Aaron when he was in Sabin’s care, but with Heather refusing to let Sabin take him, Aaron had not been read to in quite a while. After they’d cleaned up the dishes and Aaron had taken a bath, Dmitri took him into his room and showed Aaron his book case. Dmitri had collected over a hundred books over the years, though he rarely read them anymore. Aaron picked out one called The Crystal Shard, the start of a trilogy and one of Dmitri’s old favorites. Dmitri tucked Aaron into his new race car bed, pulled up a bean bag chair and started reading to him. A few chapters into it, Aaron’s eyes were closed and his breathing had slowed, so Dmitri marked the spot in the book, set it aside and turned out the light.

Standing in the doorway, he watched Aaron sleeping peacefully for a few moments, shook his head, and shut the door behind him. Dmitri thought he was doing pretty well so far as a stand-in father but was still unsure about how things would work long-term. He didn’t even know if there would be a long term. He had the next day off but the day after that, Monday, he would have to go to work. There was a day care center there free of charge for employee use, but he knew no matter what he did, word that he suddenly had a kid would stir up a load of office gossip. Still, he couldn’t just leave Aaron at the apartment, and Aaron would be out of place and bored out of his mind sitting in the office all day. Worries to deal with later, thought Dmitri.

The next day he rearranged the apartment a bit, moving his desk into his room and the entertainment center out into the living room. He left the bean bag chairs in Aaron’s room and moved the dresser Garret had been using into Aaron's room as well. It was at that point he realized Sabin hadn’t left any clothes with Aaron, so the two of them went shopping. Dmitri was clueless as to what was in style for five year olds, or for that matter what was in style for any age. He had always just picked out the clothes he thought looked good on himself, so for the most part that’s what he let Aaron do. He made sure the boy had decent looking clothes to select from though.

It was later that evening that Dmitri showed up with Aaron in his new clothes for dinner with Trish and her brother, Jeremy. Dmitri was actually a bit surprised at himself – he was feeling nervous and normally didn’t feel that way. In truth he wasn’t completely comfortable with his new position as a father to Aaron. He was still struggling with feelings left over from his relationship with Sabin. There was a time where without hesitation he called Aaron his son and considered himself a father to Aaron. The emotional attachment he felt to the boy then and the pain he felt when Aaron was taken away from him were not forgotten. It also didn’t slip his mind that Sabin could be coming back at any time to take him away once more. As the door in front of them opened, Dmitri pushed such thoughts from his mind and smiled back at Trish, who greeted them and invited them inside.

The first thing Dmitri noticed was the warm aroma of baking banana bread, followed shortly by the smell of dressing and pork loin. They walked down a short hallway to a fairly large living room. A man who appeared to be about the same age as Dmitri came out from around a corner. He smiled and introduced himself as Jeremy, shaking Dmitri’s hand. At the same time an excited Dylan came running into the room and leapt at Aaron. The poor boy didn’t know how to respond to that and was knocked to the floor with Dylan on top. Aaron struggled a little and got out from under him, but this only became an invitation to more wrestling. While Dmitri appeared a little stunned, Trish and Jeremy only burst out laughing.

“You’ll have to forgive Dylan,” Jeremy said. “Trish here neglected to raise him with any manners.”

“Hey!” Trish answered in protest and was soon joined by her son. The moment’s distraction gave Aaron the time he needed to pounce the boy though and pin him to the floor.

“I give!” squealed Dylan, and Aaron got up off of him. “Let’s go play some video games,” Dylan suggested and the two made their way into what Dmitri presumed was Dylan’s room.

“Well off they go,” mused Jeremy while watching the boys run down the hall. “That, I presume, was Aaron, which must make you Dmitri.” The man appeared to be in his late twenties. He was clean shaven and dressed in a dark blue, button-down shirt, covered in a pattern of vines with the top two buttons left unbuttoned. Beneath it could be seen a deep red undershirt. His hair was light-brown and medium-length for a guy, and was styled very neatly with some kind of gel. It was his eyes and his warm smile that caught Dmitri’s full focus though. Even in the dim light, they held a bright blue hue to them which simply enchanted Dmitri, and the smile was truly disarming. From his appearance, Jeremy was clearly someone who would take care of himself, and the smile hinted at a person who was very compassionate.

“Yes, that’s right,” was all Dmitri managed to say as he shook Jeremy’s outstretched hand. It felt lame, but he didn’t know what else to say.

“Well, come right in,” Jeremy invited and motioned for Dmitri to follow him into the living room. “Have a seat, make yourself at home.”

“Okay.” Dmitri said and sat down on a loveseat.

“Since it seems Trish volunteered us both for this little date, I’ve volunteered her to cook dinner for us.”

“It’s a good thing too. You never know what you’re going to get when he’s cooking!” shouted Trish from the kitchen, causing Jeremy to blush a little.

“Hey, my cooking’s not that bad!” He protested.

“I’m sure it’s fine,” Dmitri consoled with a friendly smile.

Just then Dylan came running back into the living room with Aaron close behind. Dylan had a game in hand which he started up as he and Aaron sat down in front of the television.

“Come on. I’ll give you the tour,’ Jeremy said and led him about, showing Dmitri the apartment. It wasn’t especially spacious but did have two bedrooms, a decent sized bathroom, and a balcony. Jeremy didn’t have quite as good a view as Dmitri did but it was decent nonetheless. “It isn’t much but it’s affordable on a teacher’s salary,” Jeremy laughed as he wrapped up the short tour. The two of them sat down and watched as Aaron and Dylan played, making light conversation until dinner was ready. The five of them sat together at the table and began to eat.

“So, Jeremy, tell me about your work… what do you teach?” Dmitri asked.

“Two classes of AP US History, a class of AP European History, and an introductory course in philosophy at a high school about twelve miles north of here.”

“Wow… that sounds rough.” Dmitri remarked.

“Oh it’s not so bad,” Jeremy started. “The advanced placement students usually have a genuine interest in learning, and the philosophy class was my personal project – all the students taking it signed a petition to have it available last year. Besides, I essentially get the summer off to pursue my own interests. It gives me the chance to focus my energy on a project I’ve been working on.”

“What kind of project?” asked Dmitri.

“Well, it’s complicated, but essentially I’m attempting to compile a text outlining practical reasoning behind the answers I’ve come up with to every moral question I come across without resorting to any contradictions.” At this point Dmitri was staring at him with his eyes wide and mouth hanging open. “Of course it’s far from finished,” Jeremy concluded with a smile.

“Man you are ambitious.” Dmitri really was impressed, and even intrigued. He’d considered doing a similar project when he was in undergraduate school but never got past his first few lines. “I’d like to take a look at it sometime.

“Oh, you’re a fan of philosophy, Dmitri?”

“Absolutely, I even considered majoring in philosophy in college but by that time it was too late to change majors,” Dmitri answered.

“So do you prefer the cognitivist approach or the non-cognitive stream of thought?” Jeremy asked, testing Dmitri.

Dmitri actually snorted. “I’ve always thought of non-cognitive thought as an oxymoron,” he said laughing. “Although, I must admit that in many ways I’m a pragmatist at heart, and I’ve always found the self-defeatist approach of a meaningless world, as is implied by the theory of non-cognitivism, to be quite… meaningless.”

Jeremy stared at him for a moment before bursting out laughing. “Well said, my friend. Well said!”

Trish just rolled her eyes, “What have I gone and gotten myself into? I’ve got enough to deal with with just one guy babbling about philosophy, and now I’ve got two?”

“Hey you’re welcome to join the conversation if you have anything to add!” Jeremy retorted.

Trish stuck her tongue out at him before recomposing herself and turning to face Dmitri, “So what kind of work do you do, Dmitri?”

“I work as part of a political consulting firm downtown. I help collect and analyze demographic data about those most willing to support any given proposal and the degree of support they would have for it as well as seek out new clients. Our clients range from political candidates seeking office to local schools running fundraisers. Even the city council hires us when it needs the information we can provide.”

“So it’s a mostly local operation?” Trish asked.

“I’m working as co-lead of operations in the regional branch of the larger organization. My boss is the regional operations officer. His boss is the chief operations officer, Bob Kneeley, and his husband under California law is the CEO, Dean Kneeley.” Dmitri explained.

“So what do you actually do?” Jeremy asked.

“Just about everything” Dmitri started with a chuckle. “I have several teams working below me, and whenever they need help with anything I pitch in. I spend a fair amount of time keeping the clients happy by figuring out exactly what it is they want and directing the teams on the projects we take on.”

“That sounds….”

“Boring,” Dylan interrupted, “We’re finished. Can we go back to playing now?”

“Hey!” Trish yelled “Don’t be rude to our guest!” Switching to a calmer voice as the blush began to recede from Dmitri’s face, Trish continued “Put your plates in the dishwasher and go wash your hands and then you can go back to playing your game.”

“Yes ma’am,” Dylan conceded in a bit of a grump.

“Sorry about that,” Trish apologized to Dmitri.

“Oh it’s alright. Think about where this conversation has gone tonight, from the pitfalls of non-cognitivism to office-work, the little guy had to be bored out of his mind; I’m surprised he didn’t speak up sooner.” Humor… Dmitri knew it was the key to keeping any situation as positive as possible. If you could make people laugh then even embarrassing situations wouldn’t be so bad. He was right, and as the boys went back to playing their game, the adults relaxed into light conversation for a while.

After a while the inevitable was brought up. “Dmitri… Trish told me you’re gay, but she wasn’t clear about how you ended up with Aaron…”

Dmitri sighed and stared at the table cloth for a moment before tilting his head up again with a somber look on his face. “That’s a story I guess begins several years ago,” he began, speaking softly. “When I was twenty I was just coming out to myself, and I was struggling with some issues from my past. I met someone who was able to help me deal with those, and in time we became boyfriends. The trouble was, he was bisexual, and had just ended a relationship with a girl who turned out to be a lesbian.” Dmitri was speaking more quickly now, clearly uncomfortable with the subject matter. “Turns out she was also pregnant. He and I loved each other and while I knew I wasn’t completely ready at the time I did know that being a father was something I wanted out of life.” He was speaking more slowly again, almost as if they weren’t even there, but as he continued a measure of anger began to creep into his voice. “At the time she claimed she didn’t want to be a mother and had agreed to give the child up to us. Later in the pregnancy she changed her mind and wanted to keep the child for herself. I was away at college and my boyfriend took it upon himself to start college as well, as a way to be able to better support himself and his son later on. Over the course of about a year he grew distant from me, consumed with worry over Aaron’s care and misery at being away from me. His misery at being away from me for so long and the torture of those few meetings we had between semesters tore him apart.” Now Dmitri’s eyes grew narrow. “She wasn’t taking care of Aaron and he knew it. He tried to hide it from me but I knew. When I heard the woman say it herself, as though she was proud of the fact that she had left their 8 month old son in a bathtub and walked out, returning to find a huge bruise on his head, my blood boiled with anger.” He sighed, doing his best to allow the hatred he knew he had for that woman to fall from his face. “But there was nothing I could do,” he continued, “and it was destroying my boyfriend, knowing his son was not being cared for while he was at college. Eventually he just couldn’t take it anymore and stopped talking to me. Later I got a call saying he wasn’t in love with me anymore. A week after that I learned that the same woman who had days before told me she had no interest in him had offered to take him back.” He paused for a moment. Even after all these years he still felt the stab of betrayal as though it were fresh.

“Wait, didn’t you say she was a lesbian?” Jeremy asked.

“Yes.”

“Then why would she want to try to get him back?”

“Heather is not a moral woman. She is selfish above all else and self-serving. I cannot say for certain but I have good reason to believe she manipulated him into coming back so that when her grandparents died she could leech off of him instead of them.”

“Why would he even consider going back to a lesbian though? That can’t possibly work.”

Dmitri quieted his voice a bit. “Sabin loves Aaron more than anything else. He knew Heather was not taking care of him and that if he allowed Aaron to be raised in that house he wasn’t going to be raised at all, but neglected through childhood. Sabin came from a wreck of a home and wasn’t willing to let his son do the same. This, I am certain, is the main reason he went along with it.”

“Couldn’t he have just sued for custody if she’s such an unfit mother?” Trish asked.

“Sabin was on probation at the time and wouldn’t have stood a chance.” Dmitri rushed through his next sentences. “Anyway, he left me, broke my heart, and swept my chance at being a father away from me. It hurt, but I got over it. That was about four years ago. A couple days ago he showed up on my doorstep with Aaron and asked me to take care of him for a while. He said it wasn’t safe for Aaron to live where they were anymore and he needed someone he knew he could trust to take care of him.”

“And you agreed…” Jeremy stated more than asked.

“How could I not? I’ve always wanted to be a father, and there was a time when I felt whole-heartedly for this boy as my son. I couldn’t turn my back on him now, even if things didn’t turn out the way I wanted them to. I have him now, so I’ll be the best father to him I can be for as long as I have him.”

Silence passed between them for a few moments. The conversation had gotten much heavier than any of them had intended.

“Well,” Trish started in an effort to crack the ice, “that’s a very commendable attitude to have about it.

“Thank you,” Dmitri answered.

Jeremy seemed somewhat distraught. He wasn’t sure what to say. The amount of information he was absorbing was considerable, and he didn’t know where to begin for a response. “I need to use the restroom,” was what he settled on as he excused himself. He did need to go, but more because he was losing his composure than because of a call from nature. He returned to find the dishes and leftovers had been put away. Trish was sitting on the couch, watching the boys playing a game. She stood up and walked over to him. “He’s outside on the balcony,” she whispered. “Go and talk to him.” Jeremy nodded; feeling a little embarrassed, he walked to sliding glass door and opened it to join Dmitri on the balcony. Dmitri was staring off into the distance but turned and looked at Jeremy as he was joined.

“I’m sorry I kinda ran out on you back there,” Jeremy apologized.

“It’s alright. It’s my fault anyway.” Dmitri said and returned to staring out into the distance.

“No, listen,” Jeremy started, joining Dmitri on the balcony, “I think it’s great what you’re doing for Aaron. It’s got to take a lot of strength to be able to take him back into your life after what happened and you should feel proud of yourself. I know it’s got to feel awkward sometimes, and I know it’s got to hurt, knowing he will probably be taken away again, but you’re showing more courage with him than I see many parents take with their children. Mine sure as hell never cared about me an inkling of how much you care about him.”

Dmitri breathed deeply, refusing to get so emotional as to cry. He knew Jeremy was right. He may not be Aaron’s biological father, but he loved him just as much as though he were. Jeremy put an arm around him and Dmitri whispered, “Thank you.”

“Now,” Jeremy continued, feeling a little ambitious, “I’m told you’re recently single. Is that right?”

“Yeah,” Dmitri answered, chuckling a little at the way Jeremy put that.

“Well,” Jeremy said standing up straight instead of leaning on the balcony, a subtle invitation for Dmitri to do the same, “Let’s fix that,” he said softly as he leaned in slowly. Dmitri responded by doing the same, and wrapped his arms around Jeremy as their lips came closer. For one unique moment, they could each feel a slight chill, and then a warm sensation fill them as their lips met, pressed together very tenderly, and parted again.

“Hey you two break it up, that’s enough!” cried young Dylan, who thumped his hand on the glass door his face was pressed against. Aaron was watching too with a curious expression.

“Alright, kids I think it’s about time you went to bed, isn’t it?” Trish said, peeling Dylan off the door.

“But Mom!” he protested.

“No buts. You promised to be good for uncle Jeremy and now you’ve gone and gotten him all red-faced with his new boyfriend so its time for you to go to bed.” Dylan pouted at that but gave up protesting anymore.

Dmitri and Jeremy came back inside and Dmitri took Aaron by the hand. “Come on kiddo. It’s time to go. He walked with Aaron to the door and Jeremy followed, opening it for them. “Thanks for having us over,” Dmitri said.

“You’re both welcome over any time,” Jeremy answered and pulled out a small piece of paper. “Here’s my number. Give me a call some time. Dmitri took the little piece of paper and smiled, sticking it in his pocket.

“I will,” he told him.

The discovery of their voyeurs may have brought Dmitri and Jeremy’s intimate moment to a quick close, but the kiss would leave them both thinking about each other for the rest of the night.