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    A.J.
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  • 146 Words
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  • 30 Comments
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Teach Me How - 1. Poem

When I lost you it hurt so bad.
The wound keeps reappearing,
Like a cut on my skin.
I try to make the pain just float away,
But it is trapped in my heart, forever to stay.

This wound, it grew, as you left my world,
Your loss left a hole too large to be filled.
My friends tell me to remember all the good times we had,
But frankly I ignore them, too angry, too bitter, too mad.

No matter how many days go by,
I still find myself stopping to cry.
In the car, on the street, and the places we used to meet.

I’m jealous of others who don’t feel this sadness,
Their days not filled with the pain and the madness.
Trust me that I loved you more than you'll ever know.
Someone please teach me how to let this hurt go?

Copyright © 2013 A.J.; All Rights Reserved.
  • Like 13
  • Love 2
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

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well it's a sad poem :(

and as poems that I have read go it's not bad...

although, (only saying this to be helpful) you might want to stay with a single theme when writing it... like the rhyming if you want to rhyme every 2 lines it should be throughout the poem not just in the middle and so on...

It does however do what poems are supposed to do which is get the feelings across, which is good, you want to make your readers feel what you feel when you wrote it or what you were trying to get them to feel otherwise it's a waste of time... and you did it :)

:hug:

  • Like 1
On 07/11/2013 07:08 AM, Celethiel said:
well it's a sad poem :(

and as poems that I have read go it's not bad...

although, (only saying this to be helpful) you might want to stay with a single theme when writing it... like the rhyming if you want to rhyme every 2 lines it should be throughout the poem not just in the middle and so on...

It does however do what poems are supposed to do which is get the feelings across, which is good, you want to make your readers feel what you feel when you wrote it or what you were trying to get them to feel otherwise it's a waste of time... and you did it :)

:hug:

That is good advice about keeping a single writing theme throughout the poem. I think my goal was getting the feelings across and less using a specific writing strategy. Thanks for your review and comments. :)
  • Like 1
On 05/04/2013 03:52 PM, asamvav111 said:
The 3rd stanza took my breath away. Absolutely gorgeous composition! This is a prime example, how the most private emotions bring about the most creative pieces. I can not heal what brought about this pain and sadness, but I think it is a fitting memento to the deceased's memory. You should be proud of yourself. :hug:
I appreciate your review and kind comments. :)
  • Like 1

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