Blood and Love - 4. Sean’s story III – A New beginning

I stopped at the door trying to catch my breath and control my emotions flooding out of my eyes. Amanda shouldn’t see me in this pathetic state. She had tried so hard to get me out of my shell and had been really happy a week ago when I had declared my fresh beginning. I didn’t want to upset her when she already had some news about Aaron. After I was sure I was calm I rang the door bell.

The door opened and I looked up to find some one else instead of Amanda standing there. I tried to re-collect but he was a stranger. About 6 ft 5 inches in height, jet black hair, a haughty face with a sharp nose and arched brows. He had hazel blue eyes which immediately reminded me of Evan.

“That’s Sean, Daniel. Let him come in.” I heard Amanda’s voice from the living room.

The guy named ‘Daniel’ moved his muscular frame to let me in. I walked in and saw Aaron seated on the sofa, with bruises and band-aids on his face.

Worried I asked. “What happened to you, Aaron?”

He threw me a dirty look and turned his face to stare in the opposite direction. I sighed and cast Amanda a questioning glance. However it was Daniel who answered my question.

“He got into a fight with some boyfriend of his, Randy something. They were pretty drunk and he hit him. He was going to smash a bottle on his head but I intervened and brought him here.”

I was shocked. “I dunno how I can ever thank you for this…”

He cut across me, “Its fine. Ain’t a big deal. I should get going now. It’s late.” With his pompous and cold announcement and a brief nod in Amanda’s direction, he left.

I turned towards Aaron. “What the hell were you thinking getting drunk and involved in a dumb brawl? Don’t you realize that Amanda and I would have been worried sick if something bad had occurred? After our parents’ death, do you want to rip the small family apart completely?”

I thundered in anger. The fear of losing him and his irresponsible behavior had fuelled my anger. Amanda sat their crying silently. However, Aaron turned his face towards me, anger, pain and hatred etched in his features.

“Shut up! Had it not been for you, mum and dad would have been around today! You are the reason our family was torn apart. I hate you! I don’t wanna see your face! Don’t you dare gimme any sermons?”

With these words that slashed my heart, he got up and went to his room as fast as his injuries could allow. I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned to Amanda with tears in my eyes. She was crying too and looking at me sympathetically.

“I’ll see you in the morning.” I quickly spoke and ran upstairs to my room. I looked the door and slid down it, sitting on the floor. Tears continued to leave my eyes as Daniel’s words repeated in my mind. I cried bitterly. I was deeply hurt and my heart was aching. I was trying hard but fresh tears continued to escape. Suddenly I heard a tap at the window.

I stopped crying, my senses alert. What was that noise? The room was dark and the window closed with white drapes on it. I couldn’t see any shadow outside. Gathering courage, I switched on the lamp beside my bed and steadily approached the window. My heart was pounding in my chest and I could sense a high rush of adrenaline.

After what seemed an eternity I reached the window and removed the drapes. Then with a shaking hand I reached out and opened the window.

“Hey! Can I come in? It’s cold outside!”

I jumped back in fright and fell on the floor. I looked at the face outside in complete shock. When sense and relief washed over me I whispered in frustration.

“Evan! What the hell are you doing here in the middle of the night! And at my window! For Christ’ sake! Are you nuts?”

“You can scold me as much as you like. But at least allow me to come in. I need your permission to enter your house.” He gave me his ever charming smile.

I softened and said, “Come in, Evan. Why do you need my permission?”

“Courtesy.” He winked at me while entering. “Nice room!” He said after casting one sweeping glance across my neat and well-organized room.

“How come you’re here at this hour, Evan?” I gave him a meaningful look.

“I came to check on my friend. You seemed very upset and when I reached here I heard Aaron shouting.” He confessed with his head bent.

I remembered Aaron’s words, sat on the edge of the bed and broke into tears. In a heartbeat Evan was sitting next to me. He put an arm along my shoulders, lifted my head with the other and looked into my eyes.

“Please don’t cry, Sean. It’s not your fault that your parents died. Aaron is just unable to get over them. You shouldn’t feel guilty for it.” His eyes showed pain and his voice empathy.

I buried my face in his chest. He slowly ran his hand though my hair and patted my back. After ten minute I finally gained control and was sobbing.

“Come on, Sean. Speak with me. Spill your heart out. You’ll feel loads better.”

I hesitated for a second before speaking, “Aaron is right. It’s my fault that our parents are dead. Last summer I had run off to a late night party at a friend’s where the cops raided on a tip of weed. They found the drugs and everyone was taken to the sheriff’s office. My parents were called to the office. While returning from the office mum and dad were telling me off in the car. Suddenly, a tow truck coming from the opposite direction went out of control and spiraled on the road. Dad steered hard and the car went off the bridge into the waters. The next morning I woke up in the hospital. My parents had died but I had miraculously survived. Miraculously! No! I’m condemned. It’s my entire fault!”

By the end I had become hysterical again and was crying hard. Evan hugged me tight and tried his best to comfort me. When I had calmed down he spoke.

“Listen to me Sean. It was not your fault. You are not responsible for their death and you should not feel guilty about it. It was fate. Things happen in life which we feel responsible for. And we are at times. But this was something that wasn’t in your control. No one had any idea what was destined. Your parents would hate to see you in this state. Their love for you and their peace rests in your serenity, Sean. We know life can be harsh but we have to accept and move. Burying yourself in the past is a grievous mistake. You have to move on. Aaron will understand your love sooner or later. We will make him realize. I love you, Sean. I cannot bear to see you in this state. It pains my heart.”

I looked into his eyes and saw tears. The tight knot in my chest was slowly dissolving. I could breathe freely as if a burden of ages had been removed. A wave of relief and serenity washed over me as I felt the guilt and despair fade from my life.

As I looked into his eyes I reached forward, and touched his lips with mine. With my left hand on his cheek I moved closer to him while my tongue entered his mouth. He hands on my back; he pulled me against his chest. His lips were warm and wet. Our tongues were playing against each other. I could feel him smiling enjoying. My heart was fluttering with happiness.

Finally, we ended the kiss. His blue eyes met mine and I finally said.

“I love you, Evan.”

“I love you too, Sean.”

“And now you should get some sleep. I don’t want my boy friend looking all puffy-eyed and depressed tomorrow.” He laughed and pulled me to lie with him on the bed.

“Yeah. I should. It’s been a long day.” I smiled as I rested my head on his arm.

“Hang on for a sec.” He got up and pulled off his shirt and threw it on the chair.

“It was wet. You leak a lot.” He teased me and got back into bed. I laughed and snuggled.

“Not anymore. Now that I have you.” I winked at him.

“I love you.” He smiled and switched off the light.

“I love you too.”

I spoke in the darkness as his lips brushed against mine for a brief kiss. I put my head on his arm and hand on his chest. I felt happy and calm in his arms. The past had been buried. Tomorrow, I shall wake to a bright morning and step into the world with Evan. A new beginning awaited us.

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