Silver Bullets n' Roses - 5. Let Go

The wound was still festering, and his shoulder looked like it had gone through a meat grinder, but it looked much better than it did last night. Matt had been staring at his shirtless reflection in the bathroom mirror for at least ten minutes now. His eyes slid away from the horrible wound to his face, taking in haunted look in his eyes that hadn't been there before. Dark shadows there gave the impression he hadn't slept in days.

Matt ran some water and splashed it over his face, pausing when he saw something dark on his palm. Stopping abruptly, he held his shaking hand up to his face. Almost like it had been draw, he could see the pulsing outline of a paw print. When the hell did he get that?

"Get your ass downstairs before you're late!" Beth screamed from downstairs.

By the time Matt got downstairs, he was dressed head to toe in black, complete with fingerless gloves, his thick hair free and artfully messy about his face. Beth rolled her eyes at him, but for once she said nothing.

Matt acknowledged her a nod, grabbed a Poptart from the countertop on his way through the kitchen, and left without a word.

The normality of high school was almost jarring. Cheerleaders bitched about girls they didn't like, nerds argued over chess and anime, and the jocks made crude jokes about which girls they wanted to bang and when. The conversations were exactly the same as they had been yesterday, and the day before, and so on. And Matt had werewolves running through his head.

At the thought, Matt opened his locker, noting gratefully that all of his possessions were still there. Same load of books, occasional cruel notes he had saved, and a tiny picture of him and Ted tucked in the corner. He checked his reflection in the mirror on the inside of the door. Still normal. Under the kohl-painted eyes, the circles seemed to have disappeared, and after peeking under his gloves the paw print had vanished. Even his shoulder wasn't bothering him. Was he crazy? Did all of it really happen?

"You're different today."

After nearly pissing himself in shock, Matt turned to face...Karyn Holms? No one usually talked to him, but of all people... "W-what?" he rasped.

She looked down at him - damn it, even a girl was taller than him - with a slightly dazed expression. If it had been anyone else, he would have thought she was trying to figure him out. But, this being Karyn, he knew it was her usual expression. "Everything about you...has changed. I don't know if I like it."

Well, what can you possibly say to that? He wanted to ask how she would know anyway, since they've only said a handful of words to each other all year. Keeping his mouth shut he decided to just settle with a nod and an "Oh?"

Her eyes were an almost impossible shade of green, and she stared at him so intently he had to look away, using his locker as a distraction. Well, this was awkward.

Karyn seemed blissfully unaware of how uncomfortable she was making him. She was contently twirling some of her frizzy hair around her finger, apparently waiting for him to talk.

Finally, Matt decided to say something. "Look, Karyn, I don't know what this is about..."

He trailed off when he caught sight of a familiar blond head just over Karyn's shoulder. Severin!?

The werewolf was talking - Matt would call it "entertaining" - a group of girls across the hallway. His attitude had done a complete one-eighty since last night. Gone was the silent, intimidating guy from the vet's: now he was the life of the party. He was laughing and smiling and cracking jokes. Mind you, Matt thought the mask was about as fake as Pamela Anderson's boobs, but the change was still dramatic.

More importantly, why was he here?

Severin glanced his way for the briefest of seconds. It wasn't exactly inviting.

Leaving his "conversation" with Karyn trailing, he walked over there in time to hear the end of the typical teenage dialogue:

Random Girl #1: ...so, she's like, a total witch, y'know?

Severin: Sure. "Beware Mrs. J"; that can't be too hard to remember.

Random Girl #2: Other than her, you should be fine.

Random Girl #3: Um, Sean, us and a few other kids are going to this café later this evening; wanna come? You do have you license, right? 'Cause if you don't, I can pick you up.

Random Girl #1: It would be awesome if you would. [Gives Severin doe eyes].

Severin: Damn, Donna, as much as I'd love to take you up on that, I'm afraid I can't go. Still got a lot of unpacking to do. Some other time, though, kay? [Insert charming smile here].

Donna: That's cool. We've got to get to class, though, so seeya around! [Flirty cheerfulness].

Severin: I'll see you there next period. [Another charming smile for the road].

The façade melted away as he turned to Matt. "May I help you?" he asked coolly.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Maybe he should be nicer, but after what just happened, he would have been happy not to see another werewolf for the rest of his life.

"Always so charming, aren't you?" His eyes pointedly went to Karyn, who had followed Matt over.

"He feels funny, too," she said to Matt in a loud whisper.

"I was thinking the same thing," said Severin, who was eyeing her with obvious distrust.

Matt glanced between the two of them, unsure of what was going on. Finally, he said, "Karyn, we're going to the same class next, right? I'll see you there. I need to talk to Sev - um, Sean for a minute."

She nodded cheerfully and skipped - yes, literally skipped - off to class.

"Girlfriend?" Severin asked, glaring after her.

"Please."

"Oh, that's right...you're-"

"Don't go there. I like girls too, just...not her. I suppose just because you're straight means you want to bang every girl there is?"

"When they happen to look like that, yes," he replied shamelessly.

"You're such a...tool."

"Only when it comes to my own tool." He batted his eyelashes suggestively, looking so cute for a moment that Matt had to laugh.

"So I get a smile out of you, finally. No more World War III? Because if we can get along, this whole deal would be so much more tolerable."

"Deal?"

Severin opened his locker door in front of them and signaled for Matt to come closer. "I'm apparently supposed to be your babysitter for the time being."

"Babysitter?" Matt hissed indignantly. "I don't need any babysitter."

"Maybe babysitter was the wrong term. Look, I'm nearly a warrior, and I'm strong. You've only changed just yesterday, and you don't know shit. Also, there's a rogue werewolf on the loose that will either kill you or recruit you. Those are all very good reasons why I have to look after you for a while, and teach you our ways...at least until you can take care of yourself. Besides, Cobaine's a bit too old for the job."

Finally, someone confirmed to him that last night wasn't a dream. If Severin didn't look so scary half the time, he would have hugged him.

"I guess I can understand that. Just don't crowd me, okay?"

Severin rolled his eyes. "Certainly. Wouldn't want to ruin your booming social life."

Matt turned to storm away, stung, but Severin grabbed his arm with inhuman speed. "Sorry, I shouldn't have said that. I'll walk with you to class."

"You have first period with me?" Severin was a year above Matt, but history was a combination of freshmen and sophomores. Still, with it being a relatively large school, it was quite a coincidence they had the class in the same period and semester.

"Cobaine made sure that mine was with you. Other than that, I don't have any other classes with you."

Matt nodded, unsure if he was happy about it or not.

Though the presence of Severin kept Matt from denying last night really happened, he was still unsettled by how normal he felt. No bloodthirsty cravings, no need to want to hurt someone. He felt completely normal. Maybe a little more energized than usual, but it was no different than he would have felt if he drank a Red Bull.

He tried to get Severin to explain to him why he felt the same. All Severin had to say was, "It'll come" ominously.

He almost couldn't wait until it did come, just so he could be ominous without effort.

Karyn continued to follow him around a bit that day, but Matt found that he wasn't bothered by her. Sure, she was not completely mentally there, but she was sweet and pretty cute. What little she had to say was off the wall and hard to respond to, but she made better company than most people. Well, there wasn't really anyone to compare her to.

He sat at his usual solitary spot during lunch. Severin had taken his wish to be alone to heart and sat with a group of elite sophomores some distance away. Their eyes met a few times. Matt could tell right away that Severin would definitely be one of the popular kids. He was already consumed in the high school hierarchy, and for some reason, this deeply saddened him.

Who was he kidding? Severin was hot, funny when he wanted to be, and charming. Matt was...well, Matt. The boy who liked boys. Weird emo kid. Of course Severin would be in the in-crowd. Why would he want to be friends with someone like Matt?

Lost in the seas of self-deprecation, Matt didn't even see Karyn joining him at his table until she had already sat.

"Are you gay?"

Matt, who had unfortunately been drinking his milk at the time, sent most of it spewing across the table.

"W-what!?" he coughed out when he got his breath back. "Why do you ask?"

Karyn absentmindedly handed him a napkin. "Because you keep looking at that blond kid...the one that's like you. And Roman sometimes, too."

A shiver went down Matt's spine. "I don't look at Roman because I like him. I'm...afraid of him."

"Why?"

"Another day, Karyn." After a pause, he added, "I'm not gay. I'm bi."

"Cool."

Of all the people he had come out to, "Cool" wasn't the usual reaction.

They spent the rest of lunch in comfortable silence, with Matt thinking that if everyone were as direct as Karyn, the world would be a lot simpler place.

Matt stood outside the school, wondering if he should ride the bus or take his chances walking home. If he took the bus, he would most likely be bullied, and he didn't even have Karyn to sit it out with. If he walked, he would risk being late and then there would be dire consequences. Finally deciding he could sit through a few minutes of teasing rather than his dad's wrath, Matt set off towards the bus parking lot.

Suddenly, Severin materialized beside him. Literally.

Fighting the urge to flinch, Matt said, "Hey, stranger."

"If you still doubt about what you are, come with me."

Matt looked at him questioningly. Severin's face was cool, casual. Anyone watching would have thought they were discussing the weather. Matt looked around before responding.

"Thanks for asking nicely. What do you have in mind?"

"That will ruin the surprise. You know the field just outside of town? We're going there."

He cut through the crowd of kids in the parking lot, giving Matt no choice but to follow. People looked at them in mild surprise, probably wondering why was the town fag following "Sean," the cool kid. His cheeks burning with shame, Matt kept his head down and tried to keep up. It wasn't easy. Severin had more than a few inches on him.

The outskirts of Libertyville were only five or six blocks away from the school, during which little was said between the two of them.

"So you think Gabriel still wants me?" Matt finally broke the silence. Just saying his "sire's" name made his wound ache.

"Most definitely," Severin said without hesitating. After a half a second, he added, "And if you don't go willingly, he'll most likely send some reinforcement."

"Reinforcement?" Matt's voice cracked a bit on the word.

"Well, biting and changing you is against the law. Our law. Gabriel doesn't look it, but he is a mature werewolf that comes from a long line of powerful werewolves. He controls twenty or thirty human-turned wolves that he chose carefully based on power."

"He'd declare war over me?"

"Not just you. Because what he did is illegal, and this is the first time anyone's caught him, he knows we could easily report him. He'd most likely get put to death. He might declare war to take over our territory and drive us out of town to keep us quiet. You would just be a trophy. He passed all of his strengths to you, and added to the fact you are already spiritually powerful, you'd make a pretty tough opponent in a fight."

"Or a sex slave," Matt added with disgust. Immediately his mind drifted to Roman, and his stomach spun with nausea. Swallowing hard, he said nothing for the rest of the walk.

Once they had reached the edge of the field, the sounds of traffic muted behind trees, Matt turned to Severin to ask him what was up. His mouth snapped shut as Severin pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it to the grass. Almost automatically, Matt tried to check him out without looking like a pervert; Severin was hiding a pretty hot body underneath those clothes. His chest and shoulders were broad and well-defined, his torso leading into the sexy "v" shape those exercise commercials preached about. With the blonde hair, he looked like an Abercrombie model.

"What are you - ?"

"I don't know about you, but I value the state of my clothes, Matt." He reached down and unzipped his jeans. At the first glimpse of pubic hair, Matt turned away. As much as he would have liked to keep watching, he didn't want to give Severin the satisfaction of knowing that.

"Prude," he heard Severin sniff behind him. Indignant, Matt turned back to retort, but the words died away at the sight of what stood in Severin's place. He stumbled, images of last night's encounter with Gabriel playing in his mind like videotape.

A huge, cream colored wolf-like creature hovered over him, looking down at him with a familiar set of grey eyes. Matt crawled away on his back as fast as he could, wondering if he could outrun it.

Relax, it's just me. All of me. Severin's voice floated into his mind as clearly as if he were speaking to him face to face. The werewolf tilted its head and for a moment it looked like just a very large dog.

"How can you talk to me like that?" Matt remained on the ground, still uncertain.

I can say things to you like this, but you can't. Not while you're in human form, at least. Come on. There's nothing to be afraid of.

Only slightly comforted, Matt got to his feet. "Please warn me the next time you decide to do that, 'kay?"

Ignoring this, Severin lifted his huge head toward the horizon. We're going on a run.

Matt looked at Severin's long legs, bulging with muscle. "A run? There's no way I could keep up with you."

You're never going to be a werewolf if you keep thinking like a human. You can't run as fast as I can in that form, but you can come pretty close. Just relax and let go.

"Sev-"

There was a gust of air and Matt's hair whipped across his face. Severin pounded across the grass at a speed no creature could muster, barely more than blur of color. Matt's breath caught in his throat, and his heart suddenly went into overdrive. He wanted to be like that. He wanted to run. Without thinking, he tore after the creature.

Matt had never been much of an athlete. He wasn't very strong, but he could run. Even so, he had never been able to run as fast as Severin was going now. All of that changed in an instant. Suddenly his shoes were hitting the ground faster than you can blink, and he was going impossibly fast. His breaths were shallow and rhythmic, and his heart felt like it was about to burst, but the physical labor was nothing compared to the sheer exhilaration. Matt couldn't remember the last time he felt so...alive.

The tip of Severin's long tail was inches in front of him. A few more steps later and he was right next to the werewolf. Severin glanced back at him, his tongue hanging out his mouth. It was an "I-told-you-so" sort of look. Matt grinned.

It felt like only seconds to Matt, but after fifteen minutes or so of nonstop running, Severin came to an abrupt stop. Matt had no choice but to do the same; he stopped so short he was hurtled forward, rolling head over heel before coming to a halt several feet away. Curling up on his knees he coughed and gasped for breath, trying to keep his lunch down.

Severin seemed no worse for wear. He stuffed his nose into the confines of his discarded backpack, taking out his jeans. In a move too quick for Matt to observe, he was human again, the jeans held against him. He bounced on the balls of his feet, not even a hair out of place. "Now that's what the fuck I'm talking about!" He sounded like a pumped up fan at a football game. "That was excellent for a first go."

It took Matt a minute to respond. "H...how far?"

"We've been to the next town and back."

Matt finally staggered to his feet, having to use Severin's shoulder for support. "When can we do it again?"

Severin laughed genuinely for the first time since Matt had met him.