MDBCs 19 Dec 2023

The DMV was as crowded and noisy as ever. When I finally got to the  window, I asked the clerk, “Does the never-ending line of loud people ever drive you crazy?”

She shook her head. “We call it job security.”

***

There is No Such Thing as a Dumb Question, Except for These:

• I work in IT. A customer asked me if a string of numbers I'd read off was upper- or lowercase.

• Someone once asked, “Is this the museum?” I work at a pool.

• A few of the things customers have asked for at our art-supply store include disco balls, trees, and crucifixion wood.

• I'm a butcher. A woman asked if she could sleep in our freezer to test out a heavy-duty sleeping bag before a trip to the Himalayas.

***

Conversation With A Customer-Service Representative:

Me: I have a Roundup Multi Purpose Sprayer that is defective.

Customer Rep: Ma’am, we’ll need the exact name of the item. Do you have the box?

Me: No, but it’s the Roundup Multi Purpose Sprayer.

Customer Rep: Ma’am, we’ll need the box so we can have the exact name of the product.

Me: Hold on. I’ll run out to my garage and get the box. [Long pause ... ]  OK ... [huff ... puff] I have it. It says ... Roundup Multi Purpose Sprayer.

Customer Rep: Thank you for that information, ma’am.

***

Several years ago, our grandson Andrew slept at our house overnight. For breakfast I made pancakes, and I gave him one that was browner than the others.