Stefan
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Maxim hadn't come out of their bed for the rest of Saturday and the whole of Sunday. He hardly sorted his clothes nor his books nor did he decide which place his icon should have. Christian simply didn't care, he was too involved, standing naked in the kitchen, with just a short apron around his waist, cooking delicious things. Maxim hadn't expected so much enthusiasm. Hadn't there been a time when he thought that Christian couldn't speak two coherent sentences in a row? Now he had turned out to
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On Sunday, Maxim had only come home to water the plants and feed the cat. Coco was confused and looked lonely and Maxim needed some time to make it clear that he would come back and take him to another home. He wasn't sure if Coco understood his words, but he had always been a clever cat. Maxim was so eager to spend the days with Christian that he even skipped his usual Sunday visit with his parents. Soon he would bring Christian home, he promised himself. Monday he had his hands full tryin
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Maxim's finger tips slid over Christian's exposed body. Shortly after Maxim had awoke, he had crawled into his arms, enveloping them both with the bed cover and listened to Christian's steady breath. The nights with him had become enchanting; Christian was truly romantic, more than Maxim had ever expected or imagined. A rosy scar led across his belly, just short of his belly button, another over his collarbone. Slowly Maxim crawled lower and blew a kiss on Christian's resting penis. On his
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"Excuse me, can you help me with this?" Tim turned to an unimportant looking young man with wheat blond, straight hair he had combed out of his forehead. He smiled uncertainly at him, holding out a self written sheet of paper. "I can't find any of them." Tim took the tag from him to study it. "Let's see. Three of them we have in stock. The rest I can order for you." He looked up into blue, harassed eyes and saw him nodding. "Come with me." Tim sat behind his computer and typed in
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Philipp tried to stow away all of his books and videos and CD's in the travelling bag he had brought. He regretted that the single room he now lived in at the hotel he was working at hadn't enough room. He would have to leave them in the bag. He rose and looked around. Odd, he thought. Four years wouldn't leave any trace of his presence in this apartment. If he thought it over, he had never felt comfortable since they had moved here. The flat was too sterile. Much too Christian's own. Nothi
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Tim woke up alone. His searching hand found the empty pillow, still warm. He knew Philipp was still there when he heard the toilet flush. He pulled the pillow tightly to his chest and breathed Philipp's scent. Opening his eyes he saw his white downy wings lying in the corner of his bedroom, next to it his silver pants, and the slippers Philipp had found back in the night-club. The few clothes Philipp had worn were strewn about. It was an odd feeling to wake up with a stranger, Tim thought,
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Maxim, occasionally piano player at Berlin's gay bar,Made in Heaven has a long crush on Christian. When he sees his chance he takes it, not knowing that fulfilled dreams do not always hold what they promise. Being thrown in a jumble of feelings he's unaware that Christian is not what he seems to be and that some relationships are sealed in hell. Tim's waiting for Maxim, but he doesn't realize that Tim would do everything for him until it is almost too late.
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Christian passed the death's sector to his right side, riding on his motorbike. It was still a meadow, the last watch tower that once guarded the borderline between two German countries, torn down long ago. Detached houses came closer. Why Martin had rented his house exactly here? Amidst the philistine? He hated it and Philipp would hate it too. Philipp. . . . He had said he needed to visit his parents. Probably he told them about his newest conquest of a girlfriend, because he wasn't out t
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"Dead men naked they shall be one With the man in the wind and the west moon; When their bones are picked clean and the clean bones gone, They shall have stars at elbow and foot; Though they go mad they shall be sane, Though they sink through the sea they shall rise again; Though lovers be lost love shall not; And death shall have no dominion." -- Dylan Thomas He couldn't believe his eyes. Maxim's cigarette
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Ben had never seen a landscape so soft and calming. They had passed the ice covered Alps, followed the highway, which stretched along the slopes of the mountains, leaving Austria behind, entering Italy. The valley of the Isarco was gloomy, a tight passage, protected by fortresses and old Bishop towns. But then the valley opened and Ben gasped. Sun flooded apple plantations as far as he could see. In early spring it must look like a field of snowy fluffs. Simon beside him, next to the d
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The Knight of the Order of Malta pounded his fist against his chest near his heart and above his coat of mail. The wide black cloak ws billowing around him as though blown by an invisible wind. His head was covered by a tight fitting cap, leaving the contours of his stern, angular face free to the examination of every viewer. His other iron glove covered hand held the hilt of a sword, stuck into the ground next to his boots. The flickering of a torch light mirrored in his lifeless eyes. Dark, br
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Simon leafed through the Prague guide he had gotten from Nicholas yesterday when he and Ben had seen him at home. He got some good tips on what to visit and was looking forward to meeting his brother again. Finally he put it aside and opened a journal. It was another one because he left his diary at home for Ben to read. He took a pen and began to write, "Tuesday, May 26th I just crossed the border and wonder what Prague will have in store for me. I miss you already. I've learned f
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"I don't know what I felt those times. I saw Jo and was in love. It had been like with Marcus in the old times. Just that Jo was elder, well, not much elder but he had possessed the same quality. He was strong, unapproachable and a damn bastard. He was always thinking of himself. Though it made me feel helpless to face him, this feeling brought a sense of security with it. He told me what to do - while I never knew what to do with myself. I belonged to him, had been thankful for every chunk he t
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Today would be the big day. Nicholas opened his eyes by the first crack of dawn and looked around. He felt Marcus' warm body behind his back, his arm draped around himself, his fingers embracing his half erect penis. He was still sleeping and his steady breath touched Nick's bare shoulder. The light green curtains were pulled and bathed the spacious bedroom of the Ritz Hotel into the twilight of a forest. Nick almost giggled at the memory when they had arrived yesterday and wanted to have t
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Ben wondered about the amazing amount of books in Simon's flat. Have I brought them all? Apparently yes. When he had met Simon there wasn't a book here except gay magazines and porn stuff. Ben was on cloud nine because Simon had allowed him to carry all his clothes to Kay's old flat. He never thought it would be that easy to convince Simon that it would be better if they could live together, now that he was in need of care and help. Perhaps it was because of Simon's weak condition that he h
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"Gosh! What a breathtaking view!" Kay exclaimed. He stood on one of the balconies, leading from Daniel's living room in his castle. Below his feet a little river found its way through stones covered with moss and wet grass, fern and little yellow flowers. His eyes followed until he lost sight of it between grey rocks. The ivy-covered castle was spread out over three stories with two picturesque, little inside yards amongst them. The stout, merlon armed tower was the eldest and most magnific
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Nicholas' eyes carefully examined Elli Schneider's face while she was sitting casually upon a stool, very upright, trying to make a straight face. Then he looked at the canvas and matched the painted face with reality. He remembered Marcus' words, telling him lately that he tried to paint a young face with old facial lines. He heard Marcus' deep voice in his ears, speaking of Wassily Kandinsky, the Russian painter and his interpretation of painting. Kandinsky, who was a qualified musician, once
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Wolff Langenburg counted loudly. He enjoyed himself how easy he was still able to bring the tennis ball over the net and place it unreachable for his wife in the farthest corner of the court. Carola ran with effort, and panting, stopped. Wolff laughed at her. "Matchpoint." Carola grimaced and wiped the sweat from her forehead. Although it was cool the sun was shining from the sky and warmed the air as in summer. Very unusual for an April day at Sylt. The steady wind had subsided so that it
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Sunday morning Ben was awakened by the ringing of the phone in the hall. Dazed he padded barefoot over the floor boards. "Yeah?" "It's me." "Simon!" Ben almost shouted. "I want to say sorry for yesterday. I didn't mean to hurt you." "It's OK, Simon." Ben said quickly. "Do you want to come over, have breakfast?" "Yes, why not? I'll bring the rolls. See you soon." Ben put the receiver back and felt light-hearted again. So all would be OK, he thought. He was a lit
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"The face looks too young," Nicholas said almost angry as he stared at the drawing he worked on. He leaned back in his chair and chewed thoughtfully at his pencil so he missed the light footsteps on the staircase and jumped, startled, when a warm breath brushed his ear. "Supper’s ready," Marcus murmured. Nicholas turned his head to meet Marcus' red lips. Then he said unhappily, "I don't like it," and pointed to the unfinished face on the paper sheet. "Don't like it either, honey." Marc
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The air was mild when Simon stepped out of Ben's little car. Even from the outside he could hear the laughing of a crowd of people, loud music echoed over the street and broke against the walls of the houses on the opposite side of the street. "I should buy you a bigger car, Ben," he said, stretching his limbs. "Fine with me," Ben responded. "How many times would you have to sell your ass for this?" Simon rolled his eyes at Ben and gave him a box on the shoulder. "Come in, they're
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"I met Oliver in a club after my return from Hamburg where I had taken refuge after Marcus and I had broken up. Again, my memories swirl in my mind like Oliver's wheel of colours . . . Lying there under the protection of a woollen blanket under the bare, pale and dawning sky I could see his face in the clouds above me. The abundance of blond hair falling over his lovely small ears down to his shoulders, the blue eyes, later often dark ringed and at the end, glazed and without life. But
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"Summer was gone. I sensed it when I woke up and felt Oliver's body lying cold in my arms. I didn't have to look into his face nor into his eyes. I knew he was gone like the summer. His head was heavy on my shoulder and his small chest didn't move. I wondered if he would see it now: all the strange, foreign colours, swirling like a wheel, getting faster and faster the more they neared the center point. I had been dragged with them. Him and his life in the fast lane. He was 19, three years y
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THE PROTAGONISTS Benedikt Schaefer-- Young student at the Academy of Arts. Strong minded and a bit out of control sometimes. Fell in love with Simon. Simon Langenburg-- Occasional hustler and dealer. Old lover of Marcus Weidenbruch. Dismissed by Marcus when he caught him with another man in bed. HIV infected. Nicholas Zellner-- Young, very talented painter, student friend of Benedikt. Shy, hurt but gaining self-confidence by meeting Marcus Weidenbruch. Marcus Weidenbruch-- Ver
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Simon - HIV-positive - tries to sort out his life. It will be a long journey until he realizes that there is more than self-pity and takes Ben's outstretched hand. Both are involved in the chase for an old masterpiece of Michael Pacher, the South-Tyrol woodcarver of the 15th century. Their way leads them to Prague and to the mysterious connections of the Order of the Knights of Malta.
