Brotherly Love - 4. Chapter 4

Edward smiled to himself as a squire approached, reluctantly, and informed him that the King requested his audience immediately in the dining hall. It was probable that the King would now share the dealings he has had with King Vallance on the night before, particularly concerning Jasmine. There would be a summary on what was said and what he expected Edward to do – it was all routine now, every time after a visit. The time wasn’t right yet, Edward thought, to reveal to his father of his intentions, of himself, and that he would never be interested in her, or any woman. Until then, he would play along and let his father believe what he wanted to believe. It was for the best.

He liked to imagine that, despite his intention to come out, he had plenty of time. He would take things slowly, one small step at a time, and spare his family one violent shock. Although the idea pained him, it might be easier if he kept the secret until his parents have passed away. That way they would never need to know. He knew he wasn’t invincible yet, and if his father knew, he could still be stripped of his title and exiled from the palace. He would never be able to see his family again. He would live, but he would miss them greatly. If he couldn’t have both, he would choose Tyler and forget that he was a prince. Before him lay a treacherous path, should he decide to drop the pretence, the mask he was forced to wear. But were these thoughts and predictions too negative and grim to be Edward’s? Was there a taint of his brother’s melancholy? Of course, there might be positive outcomes should he told his father the truth…

At last he reached the hall and on one side Tyler was shaking, visibly upset, not willing to meet his gaze. Queen Tanya was staring into space and Ronny sat on a chair, looking happy and without guile.

‘You sent for me, Father?’

‘What is it that I hear between you and him?’ the King demanded, pointing at Tyler who kept looking at his feet. Edward stared at the kitchen boy in disbelief. Did he betray him? How could his father possibly find out? Tyler must have told him, or leaked a couple of hints to the other servants who then passed the word around, or worse, he might have made comments about his performance in bed. What a cruel joke. Edward could of course lie and save himself, push the kitchen boy away, lose him forever, save his own face and reputation. Then Tyler would be punished, in what way Edward wasn’t sure. The King could do anything in his fury. Either path would break his heart.

‘He is my boyfriend, Father,’ Edward said, bravely. He would save Tyler from his father’s wrath. He would never let him go.

The King closed his eyes and fell silent. ‘So your brother was right, then.’

Ronny? What has Ronny got to do with this? How did he find out? How dared he? It would appear then, that Tyler was also a victim and he played no part. If he had lied earlier… All sorts of questions danced in his mind, but somehow he knew he would never know why his brother did this to him. At this moment, his eyes met Ronny’s and through the frail connection established in that split second he sent his resentment and spite. Ronny averted his gaze quickly.

‘It is not right, Edward,’ the King said calmly.

‘I love him, and only him, Father.’

The King paused for a moment, shook his head, and said, ‘He…he seduced you, Edward.’

‘No, Father, I seduced him.’

‘You don’t know what you’re saying.’

‘And you do?’

In fact, the King did believe he understood the situation better than anyone else in the room, even Edward. He was proud of Edward and the bravery it took to admit his feelings, but of all similarities between himself and Edward, there was one he hoped they would not share. The royal family had always some secrets or another and only on his deathbed did the King reveal what he was thinking then, in that dining hall, and what caused him to make the decision afterwards. It was a phase, the King believed, because he’d experienced some of the same feelings in his youth, though with some discouragement from his family the feelings soon subsided and he was ashamed of the things he did, the thoughts he had and the things he wanted to do. It must have been a phase, because for him, it came and went. He knew this wasn’t something that happened to all teenagers, but he dreaded the same to happen to one, if not both of his sons. If there were such feelings at all, it was a phase, because his own experience told him this was so and therefore this must be the case for everyone else too who felt the same, especially Edward because he was his son. It was a phase and it would pass. When Edward announced the news, the King felt he was backed by wisdom of older men, those who had been through the phase and seen the end of it, and Edward must be discouraged from his ignorant convictions.

It was not illegal for a man to love another man in Misthalin, but it was not respected either. There was an unspoken censorship of the three-letter-word, and if it must be uttered, it would have to be done in hushed voices, or through euphemism. Such feelings were looked down upon, and for the public to have such views, it required the failure of imagination and empathy. Nobody knew what it meant to be Edward at the time – but then nobody knew what it meant to be anyone else. Ultimately, everyone is only truly knowable to themselves. So why judge others with our own standards, when we understand so little about what it means to be a completely different person? It is too pretentious.

Ronny sat back as he watched Edward and his father debate for minutes on end, both too stubborn to back down, both failing to convince the other. The father assumed he knew better and the son retaliated with equal tenacity. As the debate went on, the room temperature rose and no one dared to intervene. Perhaps at this moment Ronny still wondered if he did the right thing. Edward and his father rarely argued. Queen Tanya was lost in her thoughts, and Tyler was still pale and not moving.

Finally, the King had lost it. He ordered, ‘Take him away.’

Two guards went in from behind the door and reluctantly arrested Edward.

‘So be it,’ Edward muttered. To Ronny’s surprise, in his brother’s eyes was not fear or sadness – it was hatred. It was resentment and anger at everything around him in this hall, everything he once loved, believed and stood for, with perhaps Tyler his only exception.

‘No!’ came a voice. Queen Tanya was stepping in at last as she saw Edward being led away. Nobody knew exactly how much she understood the situation. Would she come to him if she did? The Queen ran towards her son, trying and failing to yank Edward away from the guards’ unyielding grip.

‘I’m going to be fine, Mother,’ Edward said, his face expressionless. In fact, he was struggling to believe his own words.

‘No…’ the Queen whimpered again, realising Edward was not struggling or resisting the arrest, like he was proud of what he had done.

As the guards led him out of the room, Edward exchanged one last look with his lover, Tyler, on the side. Ronny could not fathom what message it conferred. Perhaps a blessing, wishing him luck, or it might be a look of forgiveness. Queen Tanya was standing still, her shoulders shaking as Edward was led further and further away, out of their sight, out of their lives. Then it was silent again. Nobody wanted to make a noise. It was as though the Queen knew she would never be able to see him again. The King was still to recover his cool and Ronny was trying to absorb the entire event. Finally, it was at this moment when he looked from one face to the next that Ronny realised he alone had made this possible. Without his outburst, his brother would not have been arrested at all. Being thirteen, he was oblivious to the damage he had caused already by the end of that day. He simply didn’t know. It wasn’t until years later that he began to grasp the full extent of his crime, his betrayal, and his lack of consideration for others. By then, everything was far too late.