A Land of Lincoln Thanksgiving - Prologue. Prologue

Thursday October 31^st, 2024

Joshua stepped out of his office in search of lunch, counting the fifteen steps to the refrigerator. The suit bags hanging in the mudroom made the man smile as he passed by. He would be leaving for Champaign shortly to attend a costume party on the University of Illinois campus as Marcus’ plus one. Joshua couldn’t remember a year in which he had enjoyed Halloween, but he could barely contain his current excitement.

He had spent quite a bit of time and money on their outfits, but he had refused to tell his boyfriend what he had planned. The surprise only added to his sense of anticipation. It surprised Joshua how much he longed to be seen as Marcus’ partner amongst his Law School peers.

Quickly assembling a turkey, bacon, and avocado wrap, Joshua sat down to eat. His thoughts wandered as he chewed. Halloween fell on a Thursday, so he told Ashok and the rest of his team that he was going to take a long, four-day weekend. He hadn’t taken a weekday off in years, let alone two.

His co-workers had all but asked him directly if he had met someone, but he wasn’t ready to come out to his employees. He would consider taking that frightening and monumental step after the launch of their latest project, which he hoped to see live by Christmas. A large part of him feared that he would lose good people who couldn’t abide working for a gay boss. Marcus told him he was worrying over nothing, but Joshua still had plenty of hang ups about his sexuality.

He rinsed his plate and placed it in the dishwasher, setting it to run since he would be gone for several days. Joshua grabbed his jacket before stepping out the front door. It would have been easier to pick up his mail on his way out of town but he decided some steps in the crisp fall air sounded nice. Walking everyday was something he had started with Marcus over the summer, and he tried to keep the habit alive even though Marcus was currently living an hour and a half away.

. . .

Most of the mail went straight into the recycling bin. There was a utility bill as well as large, mysterious, hand addressed envelope with no return address. He was back in the kitchen before carefully tearing open the envelope. Inside was a gilded eight-inch by five-inch card. Joshua’s curiosity was peaked as he withdrew what he quickly realized was a fine and expensive looking invitation.

Joshua’s mood shifted as he read. There hadn’t been anything resembling a Renkin family Thanksgiving since he was twelve. That was the year his life had had begun to fall apart. 2002; Seventh grade; The year he figured out he didn’t like girls like he was supposed to. It was also the year his mother fired his childhood nanny, deciding he was old enough to take care of himself. Perhaps he had been old enough to care for his physical needs, but he had needed Rosa Ramos in his life more than ever.

Memories of that disastrous Thanksgiving without the woman who essentially raised him brought tears to his eyes. It was perhaps the last time his family had attempted to do anything remotely familial or traditional. The day had not been anything like the joyful celebration of gratitude promised on the extravagant summons he held in his hand.

He let the suddenly gaudy paper fall to the granite surface in front of him. His mother hadn’t even bothered to write a message or sign her name. The gathering would most likely be another expensive and painful family memory, made worse by the fact that Joshua was gay. He had been avoiding his parents, even after Mary’s cathartic visit several months before, but he was done lying to the world. Joshua wouldn’t hide Marcus, or how much the young man meant to him, even from his openly homophobic mother.

Joshua thought of the joy safely tucked away in protective garment bags only a few steps away. He physically pushed the invitation away even as he repelled his painful memories and negative emotions. Marcus was expecting him. He wouldn’t let his mother ruin Halloween as well.

. . .

“Why am I not the least bit surprised,” Marcus said through a large grin.

“It will be strange calling you Joshua all evening, but I met you at a moment of mental infatuation, and there is a part of me that has always thought of you as my own Joshua Fry Speed.” Joshua leered at his boyfriend, wiggling his eyebrows comically. “Plus, I couldn’t let you be Lincoln! You’d be miss quoting him all evening.”

“Well, Honest Abe did say that 73% of the things you read online are untrue,” Marcus joked.

Marcus and Joshua spent over half an hour getting into costume and character. There was more than a little playing around, but there was no need to rush. Both wore white high-collared shirts. Marcus wore a large black bowtie, waistcoat, and a black, standard-length jacket with oversized peaked lapels and velvet accents.

Joshua’s bowtie was slim. He too wore a waistcoat and his jacket was similar, although it hung down almost to his knees. Marcus helped apply the scraggly adhesive chinstrap beard before solemnly placing the iconic stovepipe top hat on Joshua’s head.

Neither man’s hair was truly long enough for their characters or the time in which they lived, but they decided to forego the wigs Joshua had purchased.

“Apart from that ridiculous beard, the look suits you, Joshua,” Marcus said when everything was in place.

“Thank you, Joshua!” Joshua said with a laugh.

“I’m glad you agreed to come. There will be a lot of people here. Are you sure you are okay with this?” Marcus knew that Joshua was still adjusting to the idea of being openly gay.

“I'm a success today because I had a friend who believed in me, and I didn't have the heart to let him down.” Abraham Lincoln’s words reached from beyond the grave into the small studio apartment in Champaign, Illinois. “Marcus, I love you. If telling the world my sexuality is what it takes to live happily ever after with the man I love, then that’s what I’ll do.”

Abraham Lincoln bent to kiss Joshua Fry Speed as he may have almost two-hundred-years in the past. It was swifter and more chaste than either would have preferred, but Marcus began to laugh as Joshua’s fake beard hair tickled his chin.

“I am definitely not a fan of that beard!”

. . .

They were a hit at dinner, even though most people had no idea who Marcus was supposed to be. It seemed every family with small children wanted a photo with the famous Illinois son. By the time their food arrived, Joshua was regretting his decision to dress up as the nation’s sixteenth president. Fortunately, he discovered that he enjoyed making the children smile.

They entered the University’s Law Library to find it crowded with costumed law students and faculty. Joshua hadn’t been to many social functions since before the pandemic. He allowed his real life and pretend partner to take the lead as they moved further into the crowded space.

Many who were gathered correctly surmised that Marcus was portraying Lincoln’s one-time law partner and life-long friend. It wasn’t a secret that Marcus was gay, and many of the friends he had made, both in his undergrad program and in law school were eager to meet the man accompanying him. Joshua did his best to be charming, while constantly redirecting the spotlight back towards his boyfriend.

“You must be Joshua,” said an older voice behind the couple, causing them to turn.

“Actually, I am Abraham Lincoln. This beautiful man is Joshua.” He didn’t recognize the older man who laughed good naturedly as he caught onto the joke.

“I see. Mr. Speed has told me a lot about you over the last several months, but he failed to mention your wit.” Joshua saw the fond look the man gave Marcus. “My name is Timothy Radcliffe. I have the pleasure of teaching at this fine institution.”

Joshua took the man’s hand, recognizing the man’s name from some of the stories his boyfriend had shared. He felt both warmth and gratitude to this man who had gone out of his way to be become both a mentor and friend to Marcus.

“Professor Radcliffe, I see you dressed up as a law professor for the evening,” Marcus joked, earning another jovial laugh from the man.

“I’m coming from a faculty meeting, and several of my peers seem to find good-natured fun offensive. Of course, if you tell anyone I said that I’ll have to plead the fifth or lie.” Joshua found himself liking Timothy Radcliffe immensely.

“Mr. Lincoln, I know you’re not on the ballot, but what to do you think about the upcoming election?” This was a question none of the children had asked the former president at dinner.

“I’m not sure what Marcus has shared, but it has been a big year for me. Since coming out, I have also allowed myself to be guided by my conscious rather than cultural or familial expectations. I’m not sure if that makes sense. Anyway, I’m a gay man and this election seems particularly personal to me. I will be siding with decency and human rights at the poles.” Joshua hadn’t talked about his changing perspectives with anyone but Marcus, and it felt freeing to be honest both about his sexuality, but also what was important to him.

“That is well said. I wish all our fellow Americans would prioritize those things, but it seems the biggest factor this cycle might be the price of eggs.” The professor appeared to get lost in his own thoughts.

“Well, as I said long ago,” Joshua adopted his Lincoln persona, hoping to lighten the mood. “Elections belong to the people. It's their decision. If they decide to turn their back on the fire and burn their behinds, then they will just have to sit on their blisters.”

Timothy and Marcus both laughed at Joshua’s antics, even as they considered the humorous yet profound quotation. For the next several minutes, the three men discussed the state of the union, and what the nation’s forefathers might say if given the chance. Eventually, Timothy Radcliffe changed the topic of discussion and the tone.

“Marcus mentioned your last name was Renkin. I know a couple of Renkins in Chicago.” Joshua heard the unasked question as his family was brought to the forefront of his mind for the second time that day.

“My parents are John and Rebecca Renkin. They are fairly well connecting in Chicago’s high society. It never surprises me to hear that someone either knows them or knows of them. My sister Mary still lives in the city as well.” Speaking of his family brought back the painful thoughts and memories he had in his kitchen earlier; both Timothy and Marcus felt the shift in his mood.

“Family can be complicated. Marcus and I have each discussed out own struggles with our parents this semester. I apologize for bringing up what appears to be a painful topic.” Timothy thought about dropping the topic but decided that he might do some good by pushing forward. “I know Mary well. She is quite an amazing woman. In fact, I think of her like family. I’ve met your parents a couple of times. For what it’s worth, you and your sister are nothing like your parents. You seem to have both fallen pretty far from the proverbial cherry tree.”

Joshua held the man’s gaze, reading his compassion and sincerity. There was something about Timothy Radcliffe that drew him in and made him want to be something more than he was.

“You know Mare?” He asked finally.

“I do. I volunteer at the non-profit she runs. I am pretty good friends with the man who founded it.” Joshua only knew a little about what Mary did for the organization she worked for in Chicago.

“You probably know her better than I do then. She’s eight years older than me. She left home when I was ten, and I haven’t done a good job staying connected. She came to visit in August, and I realized then that I should have tried harder to keep her in my life.” Marcus was suddenly at Joshua’s side with his arm firmly wrapped around him.

“Take it from an old man who was rescued from a life of lonely isolation; family makes life worth living. Not always the ones we’re born with, but often the ones we choose along the way. Mary is a part of my family because we love and respect each other. I have a very large family, even though I am not actually related to any of them.” A small smile slipped onto Timothy’s face as he thought about the many people he had adopted or been adopted by.

. . .

“Mr. Speed, I find myself imagining the most vile and exciting things when you are near. I am inclined to remove your clothing slowly before ravaging your body in the most ungentlemanly of ways.” They had both enjoyed the party, but each was glad to be back in Marcus’ small studio apartment.

“Abraham, you make a man’s heart flutter and his face blush when you speak so. You are like a dashing rogue who threatens to steal both my virtue and my heart.” Marcus loved how playful Joshua could be and found his quirky and intellectual humor endearing and erotic.

They took their time, carefully undressing each other. Once they were both naked, Joshua retrieved the bowtie he had worn all night and placed it around Marcus thin neck. Marcus smiled seductively as he struck a pose, before strutting forward like a Chippendale dancer.

Joshua allowed the younger man to take control. In moments, Marcus had him on his back in the middle of the queen-sized bed. Marcus wasn’t usually the aggressor, but Joshua lay submissively as the man he loved and trusted climbed up his prone body, tickling, licking, nibbling, rubbing.

Marcus retrieved a small bottle from the nightstand, before kissing his way back down the body beneath him. Joshua closed his eyes and moaned, hearing the man he loved pop open the lubricant. He waited for the cold slippery liquid to be applied, but was surprised when he felt the moist heat of Marcus’ mouth engulf him instead.

Marcus’ rhythm wasn’t perfect as he prepared himself and pleasured Joshua. He felt an intense love for the man who only months ago wouldn’t hold his hand in public. They had been a couple the entire evening. Joshua had worked hard to make the night with Marcus’ peers and professors special. It had been a small glimpse of what a life together might be like.

Marcus pulled free, moving his body over Joshua’s before leaning down to kiss the man he loved.

“I love you,” Marcus said as he straightened.

Slowly, the young man lowered himself down, feeling first pain and then pleasure as Joshua filled him physically and emotionally. Tears fell from Joshua’s open eyes as he both watched and felt Marcus offer up his body and his love.

“I love you,” Joshua said as Marcus began to roll his body back and forth, up and down, sharing all that he was with the man that he loved.

The upsetting invitation sat where he had left in on the kitchen Island almost one hundred miles away. He was momentarily able to forgot that it existed at all as he focused on the young man who was making him feel loved and desired.