Bovian Image - 13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

They had dinner at an exclusive restaurant in Daiba. Seated across Cole, sipping Merlot, Savan suddenly realized why he was afraid of Cole.

Cole was everything he didn’t have in his life.

Savan watched him complimenting the house chef on a fabulous meal. Cole was a self-assured gentleman, comfortable with who he was, his work, his family. Savan envied him that.

Cole glanced at him with an intimate smile meant to share secrets. Savan returned it as the chef offered to bring out their dessert right away.

“Make it something decadent,” Cole said, his gaze fixed on Savan. “I want to make sure I get my date thoroughly steeped in bliss tonight.”

Savan shook his head in amusement and watched the chef hurry off to do Cole’s bidding.

“I wasn’t expecting this kind of date.”

“What kind of date were you expecting?” Cole asked.

The atmosphere in the restaurant was intimate. Their table secluded in a candle lit corner. Cole glanced around the quiet restaurant before he continued.

“I want to earn your trust, Savan. I know we haven’t had the best of relationships. I’m sorry for that.”

“I didn’t know that you had a side like this,” Savan said with a smile.

Tracing the soft fabric of their tablecloth, Savan shook his head.

“I don’t know if I can do this. The longest relationship I’ve had is with my motorcycle. I wouldn’t know the—”

“Don’t say anymore,” Cole said, capturing Savan’s hand in his. He tangled their fingers. “I haven’t wanted to be with anyone in years.”

Savan chuckled.

“Are you telling me you’ve lived like a monk?”

“No, hardly that,” Cole said. “I’m telling you that you’re the first I’ve wanted to have more with in a longtime.”

“Here I thought you just wanted me in your bed,” Savan said.

Meeting Cole’s gaze, Savan couldn’t help wishing that he could be the person Cole wanted. He wanted to allow himself this one chance to let someone know him even a little bit. Maybe it would be all right.

“Cole—”

Savan broke off.

“I told you that your opinion won’t count in this relationship because you’re so conflicted. I see it in your eyes.”

Cole stroked the fringe of dark hair falling over Savan’s eyes with his free hand, pushing it away.

“You’re like one of those Chinese puzzle boxes we get when we’re kids. I would spend hours trying to move the pieces so that I could get the picture right.”

“What if I can’t be figured out?” Savan asked, he couldn’t help wondering what would happen when he had to leave.

Jiro Nang’s men were bound to show up. They always did. When that time came, would he be able to walk away from Cole?

“Can’t we take this one day at a time? Don’t label us. Don’t try to make us more. I’m attracted to you. Can’t we keep it that way?”

“Is that important to you?” Cole asked.

“It is,” Savan said, looking down at their intertwined fingers.

Cole’s hand was larger than his was, and warm. It felt reassuring to have Cole holding him like this. He’d forgotten what that felt like. He’d forgotten what it felt to be comforted.

“I—I need you to take this one day at a time.”

“If I promise that, will you come home with me tonight?” Cole asked.

Cole leaned forward closing the distance between them. He pressed his lips against Savan’s and kissed him slowly, thoroughly. Pulling back, he sat back in his chair and smiled.

“I’d like it if you said yes, Savan. I might turn into a crazy person if I don’t have you.”

Savan chuckled, still holding on to Cole’s hand. He licked his lips and shook his head ruefully. This was going to come back to bite him but he wasn’t strong enough to let it go. He nodded his assent to Cole.

“After I get my dessert, I’ll let you have me anyway you want. Bring it on, Lucianne.”

“Are you serious?” Cole asked in surprise.

His eyes so wide, Savan couldn’t help chuckling. It was even funnier when Cole got up abruptly and rushed away.

Left alone at the table, Savan sighed and shook his head.

What are you doing, SarEr?

He was going against all the rules, but he couldn’t stop even if he wanted. He wanted to know what it would feel like to have Cole. He needed to feel more than the fear in the deepest part of him.

He was so tired of being terrified.

Rubbing his eyes, Savan reached for the Merlot and took a sip. Cole appeared carrying a brown bag and Savan couldn’t help smiling when he realized what was in the bag. Placing his glass on the table, he watched Cole stride toward him.

“Come on,” Cole said. “We’re good to go.”

“What about my dessert?”

“I have you covered, come on,” Cole urged.

Savan stood and placed his napkin on the table. Cole tugged his elbow and led him out of the restaurant. Outside, Cole led them to his car. He unlocked it but before Savan could enter the passenger side, Cole placed the bag he was holding on top of the car and stopped him.

“What?”

“Are you sure about this?” Cole asked.

Wrapping an arm around Savan’s waist, Cole pulled him in close.

“I need you to be sure, Savan. This is not going to be a one night stand. We’re in for the long ride, and I can’t have you backing out—”

Savan smiled and leaned in this time.

Cole was taller than him, and he reveled in that little fact as their bodies came together, in a heated embrace. His hands slid up to Cole’s shoulders, before he wrapped them around Cole’s neck. Cole retaliated by wrapping his own around Savan’s waist, holding him tight so that he could feel Cole’s erection pressing against his stomach. Savan rose up so that he could kiss Cole. Using his tongue, he licked at Cole’s lips gently, before he plunged into the hot decadence that was Cole’s mouth. Savoring Cole’s taste, he closed his eyes, losing himself in their kiss, and Cole pressed him against the car.

Cole reached under his jacket and pulled up the black shirt Savan wore. Sliding his hands under it, Savan gasped at the contact of Cole’s hands on his skin. Those searching fingers caressed his back. He clung to Cole when one hand slid down to his hips, and moved to undo his belt.

“Cole,” Savan gasped pulling away from their heated kisses.

His brain was not functioning too well. The urge to give in to this heated assault was weakening any inhibitions he might have. Cole trailed kisses along his jaw to his ear, nibbling as he continued to unbuckle Savan’s belt.

“Hey, we are in a very public parking lot,” Savan managed, closing his eyes when Cole clamped his mouth on a spot on his neck and proceeded to suck.

Little electric tingles raced down his spine.

“It’s dark, no one can see us.” Cole licked at the spot on his neck as his fingers finally accomplished their goal. He unzipped Savan’s trousers, and slipped a hand inside searching for his erection. “I want to feel how hard you are.”

“If you touch me, I’m going to explode,” Savan warned burying his face into Cole’s shoulder when he felt Cole’s fingers close over him. Biting his lip, he closed his eyes as those hot fingers grasped his cock. “Oh, gods, please—”

“That is heady,” Cole murmured, as he started stroking: up and down, his thumb running over the swollen head, his thumb spreading pre-cum. “I like it when you beg. Do some more.”

It was a delicious kind of agony. Savan’s fingers curled into Cole’s jacket, gripping tightly as his hips moved along with Cole’s stroking. As if to torture him even more, Cole moved his free around to his ass, kneading him, driving him crazy, he was on the brink when Cole stopped.

It took a minute for it to register, until he felt the zip of his pants being pulled up over his aching erection, pre-cum soaked his underwear, he could barely breath without shaking. Cole was calmly buckling his belt as if he didn’t notice Savan’s needy state.

“Why did you stop?” Savan demanded when he could.

“I’m not taking you in the middle of the street.” Cole opened the passenger door and motioned for Savan to enter. “Come on, Savan, get in. If you want us to finish this, you’re going to need to move.”

Savan narrowed his gaze at the bastard, unable to take a step from where he was leaning on the car. He was so hard he was afraid one rub of his pants against his cock and he was going to disgrace himself. Shaking, he let out a deep breath, and met smiling dark eyes.

“You’re a tease,” he accused a smiling Cole.

Savan slid into the car with a suppressed groan and took the bag Cole handed him. Cole closed the door and hurried around the car. This was going to be a very long night; he decided when Cole joined him. He knew that because a savage need to lean over and keep kissing Cole surged over him like a fever. He had to grip the bag on his lap tightly to keep from giving in.

***

“You’re beautiful,” Cole murmured into the quiet room.

His hot gaze moved over Savan’s naked body. Savan lay on his white sheets, that dark hair on his pillows, he could sit here watching him for hours.

“I can’t believe you’re here.”

Savan smiled and reached up with a slender hand to caress his jaw. Cole leaned into the touch, holding those fingers against his jaw. He pressed a kiss into Savan’s palm. Letting Savan’s hand fall back to the bed, Cole moved between Savan’s open legs, his gaze pausing on the evidence of Savan’s arousal.

Savan’s cock was hard against his abdomen and leaking. Cole traced his finger over the length of it, enjoying the sound of Savan’s harsh breath. Refusing to offer any more relief, he placed his palms against Savan’s abdomen, sliding them up in a slow massage. Savan’s eyes closed and his body tensed. Cole dusted kisses along Savan’s stomach to his chest. He paid attention to the hard nipples. Suckling and biting the hard nubs until Savan was moaning in pleasure. Savan’s fingers tangled in his hair and he doubled his efforts when Savan arched into his mouth, wanting more.

He blew on the hard nubs before he captured Savan’s mouth in a hard kiss. Sucking on Savan’s tongue, he took Savan’s nipples with his fingers, caressing them, driving them both mad as Savan writhed underneath him.

“Please,” Savan begged at some point when he’d kissed every inch of his body but where he needed it the most. “Please, Cole.”

Gods, he loved it when Savan begged. Gripping Savan’s hips, Cole kissed his way down to Savan’s erection. Running a hand over Savan’s left thigh, he pushed it out opening him more.

That’s when he saw the two scars on the inside of Savan’s thigh. He studied the raised scars for a moment before he pressed a kiss on one, then the other. Savan whimpered a sweet sound between need and surprise. He glanced up to find Savan staring at him with an unreadable expression.

Cole swirled his tongue over the sensitive skin again, making Savan’s breath hitch, smiling he continued the gentle assault to Savan’s cock. He took Savan’s cock in to his mouth, making sure not to graze him with his teeth. He alternated between slow licks, bathing Savan’s cock with liquid fire, and then sucking on him hard. Minutes into it, Savan came in a furious orgasm that had him trembling, his fingers bunching the sheets with a shout.

Cole swallowed his cum and kept sucking on him until he was done. Savan threw his arm over his flushed face. Cole stroked his cock one last time, and moved to lay over Savan, his own erection pressing into Savan’s stomach.

Savan pulled him into his arms, wrapping his legs around Cole’s waist. He accepted Cole’s kiss, tasting himself. His cock hardening again, he clung to Cole.

“Take me,” he said quietly.

Kissing him, Cole shook his head.

“Not tonight, I want you ready for that.”

“I’m ready right now,” Savan said hotly, his face buried into Cole’s neck. “Do it.”

“No,” Cole said gently, rolling them to the side.

He reached for Savan’s hand and drew it to his erection. Fisting it on his cock, he kissed Savan and smiled.

“I want more from you, and you’re not ready to give it. Until that time, we’re going to make do with this.”

“Cole—”

Savan started.

“Savan,” Cole countered, closing his eyes as Savan started jerking him off slowly.

Cole groaned when Savan pushed him to his back and leaned down to take him into his mouth. Savan tried his best to take in his erection. Gripping the base in one hand, he proceeded to suck, lick and stroke in a frenzy that had Cole tangling his fingers in Savan’s thick dark hair. When it got too much, he came so hard, he couldn’t help the shout of ecstasy that escaped. Breathing hard, he opened his eyes to watch Savan keep sucking and licking at him until there was no more to give.

They took a long shower after that and then returned to bed. Once they were under the covers, Cole pulled Savan into his arms and they lay holding each other.

“Cole,” Savan said.

“Hmm,” Cole replied lazily.

“Why didn’t you—”

Savan stopped.

Turning away from Cole, he clung to his pillow, his slender body trembling slightly.

Cole ran his hand down Savan’s tense back. Pushing the covers down to reveal Savan’s bare body, he traced his palm down to Savan’s left leg. Savan lifted his head to follow the progress of Cole’s hand. Cole stopped his caress when he got to the two scars he’d seen earlier. Tracing his index finger over them, Cole propped his head up with his right hand and met Savan’s gaze.

“If I were to ask you how you got these scars, would you tell me the truth?” Cole asked.

Savan gasped. His gaze returning to the finger tracing his scars, he closed his eyes and shook his head.

“I got them a while back. I was at the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“You can’t tell me the real truth, can you?” Cole squeezed Savan’s thigh gently.

He reached for the covers and covered them. Savan lay back on his pillow his gaze on Cole.

“I told you I want to earn your trust. I warned you this wasn’t going to be fast sex. Having you here is enough for me, Savan.”

***

Savan lay with his head propped up on his right hand, his gaze fixed on Cole’s sleeping figure. The night lamp in the corner cast shadows in the room, but it gave off enough light for him to see Cole’s face. Cole looked younger in slumber, Savan thought. The curly hair tumbled all over his head, falling over his face.

Savan used his free hand to touch the silky strands, rubbing them between his fingers enjoying the soft texture. He tugged at a curl and smiled when it bounced right back.

Remembering what Cole had done to him earlier, he sighed at the fact that he was in bed with a man who’d refused to take him based on earning his trust. He’d had only one man take him in his lifetime.

Han.

He and Ahmon fooled around, never going further than heavy petting, but with Cole—Savan closed his eyes.

He wanted Cole more than he had ever wanted Han. With Han, he’d been exploring who he was. Those days, he’d needed to satisfy his needs and cravings. The lust Han fanned to life and spent hours slaking was empty compared to what he felt now with Cole.

It was madness.

Savan opened his eyes and lay back staring at the ceiling. He shouldn’t be here contemplating deepening this thing. If he allowed this relationship, it was going to take him over. All those emotions Cole evoked with a touch made him pause.

He wasn't sure he could allow this to continue, not now, not ever, not while he couldn't even give Cole his real name.

Nope…that wasn't it.

The truth was that if he did allow himself to remain here, he would give Cole his real name. He wanted that chance.

He should run.

Sitting up abruptly, his gaze found the clock on the bedside table. It was twelve o’clock at night. Liang was probably at the loft, or may be at Club Hitoiro. Glancing back at Cole, Savan was happy to see him still sleeping.

Sliding out of bed slowly, Savan reached for his pants on the floor and pulled them on. He wore his t-shirt and jacket, keeping a wary eye on Cole. Finding his socks, he skipped around as he pulled them on. When he was done, he paused at the edge of the bed. He was an idiot who couldn’t leave without touching Cole. Savan leaned over Cole with a heart that was spiraling out of control and brushed a soft kiss on Cole’s forehead.

An hour later, he let himself in to the loft at Bovian Image, closing the door with a huge sigh. He took off his shoes and left them lying haphazardly at the entrance before he walked into the living room. Shrugging his jacket off, he dumped it on a stool and dropped into the couch with a tired sigh.

“How was the date?” Liang asked.

Lifting his head, Savan glanced around the room to find Liang settled on the couch across him. Liang was watching a soccer game. He hadn’t even realized the television was on. Shaking his head, Savan pushed a pillow under his head and closed his eyes.

“You didn’t go out tonight?”

“No,” Liang said. “I didn’t feel like it. What’s wrong?”

“There is nothing wrong,” Savan said, refusing to think about the reason why he was feeling so guilty.

Cole wouldn’t forgive him tomorrow morning when he woke up alone. All that stuff Cole had talked about, the man should know how big his trust issues were. The wine at dinner must have allowed him to buy into the idea of Cole.

He should never have—

A pillow hit his head and he glanced at Liang with a frown.

“That good huh,” Liang said with a laugh. “You’re glowing, what the hell did he do to you?”

“I could give you the details,” Savan shot back glumly.

“Spare me,” Liang said, raising a hand in surrender. “You had better wipe that expression off right now. You know the rules.”

“I’m so tired of them.” Savan pressed his right palm to his head. “Liang, don’t you ever just want to give in sometimes. What’s the worst that can happen?”

“You die,” Liang replied bluntly. “What is going on with you lately?”

“I don’t know.” Savan sighed and sat up. “I’m going to bed. I’m taking a day off tomorrow. I think I need to get my head on straight. I also need to make sure we’re set in case something happens. I’m feeling uneasy these days.”

“If you’re uneasy, Savan, what’s with you and Lucianne?” Liang asked. “He’ll be in danger if you keep at this.”

“I’m handling it,” Savan said, although he really had no idea how.

What was he supposed to do about the decisions his body made under duress? Yes, he was getting careless, but weren’t they already careless by running such a big business?

“Goodnight Liang.”

“Good night.”

In his own bed, Savan could barely sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, all he could think about was Cole swirling his tongue over the scars on his left thigh. Kissing those scars that he’d gotten on the run, sitting up, he pushed the covers away. It was so hot that he was sweating. Damn it, he couldn’t sleep.

Running frustrated fingers through his hair, Savan leaned against the headboard. He wanted Cole, all right. He wanted that love that man was so willing to share, but where was it going to leave them both when things got bad? Cole could end up dead like Mei.

Everyone who got close ended up that way. Imagining Cole losing everything he cared for, Savan closed his eyes trying to ward off that kind of pain.

It wouldn’t be right.

Savan spent the rest of the night tossing and turning in bed. When he couldn’t stay put anymore, he got up and prowled the loft hoping for sleep.

In the morning, Savan sat in the kitchen eating a bowl of fruit. His eyes were gritty from lack of sleep, and a large mug of coffee sat at his elbow. He was hoping that it would help jump start his energy. Chewing on a slice of banana, he started planning his day.

The automatic lock at the front door beeped and he glanced up wondering what Liang had forgotten. Picking up his mug, he took a sip, his gaze on the kitchen entrance as he anticipated seeing Liang.

When Cole walked in, Savan forgot all about his coffee as he took in the dark expression on his lover’s face.

“How could you leave like that?” Cole demanded. “Not even a note.”

***