MDBCs 05 Dec 2023

A) Back in 2003, Ninja Burger created International Ninja Day on December 5 as a way to celebrate the Ninja “speed” with which their burgers are delivered.

or ???

Legend has it that this unofficial holiday was created in 2003 to commemorate the release of Tom Cruise’s movie, The Last Samurai.

(I vote for the Ninja Burger scenario)

Professional Spies

Ninjas were professional spies in Japan. Active between the 13th and the 19th century, a ninja's job included infiltration, sabotage, espionage, and even assassination.

While popular culture is full of stories about ninjas, usually featured as cunning, secretive, brave, and skillful fighters, there are very few historical accounts of them. Historians believe that in the Japanese society ninjas were not considered to be part of an elite class of fighters - that place was reserved for the samurais. Because of this, ninjas were often recruited to do unsavory tasks like arson and terrorism.

Did Not Dress in Black

In those days, a ninja, also known as a shinobi, did not wear the all black outfit ninjas are depicted wearing today in films, TV shows, and comic books. After all, one of the main tasks of a ninja as a spy was to infiltrate by blending into his surroundings. They would often dress as the locals to do their job.

The secrecy surrounding ninjas led to the rise of legends about their skills and powers - something that has now become a part of popular culture. Modern day depictions of ninjas show them having superhuman powers such as invisibility, ability to walk on water and shape shift.

How to Celebrate?

Watch ninja movies or have a Teenage Mutant Ninja marathon.
Have a ninja themed party. Everyone dresses like a ninja.
Go to work dressed as a ninja and sneak up on your coworkers and friends.

Did You Know…

…that contrary to popular belief, ninjas were not all men? Women ninjas were known as Kunoichi.

***

Teacher: “If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?”

Vincent: “One dollar.”

Teacher: “You don’t know your arithmetic.”

Vincent: “You don’t know my father.”

***

The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading. After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes, the teacher asked, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, four minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude?"

After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, "I guess you'd be eating alone."

***

Teacher: "Why are you so late?"

Student: "Someone told me to go to hell."

Teacher: "Why did that make you late to class?"

Student: "I couldn't find it at first, but now here I am."

***

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."

"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married 10 times?"

"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative. He kept telling me how great it was going to be. Husband #2 was in software services. He was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me. Husband #3 was from field services. He said everything checked out diagnostically, but he just couldn't get the system up. Husband #4 was in telemarketing. Even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver. Husband #5 was an engineer. He understood the basic process, but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method. Husband #6 was from finance and administration. He thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not. Husband #7 was in marketing. Although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it. Husband #8 was a psychologist. All he ever did was talk about it. Husband #9 was a gynecologist. All he did was look at it. Husband #10 was a stamp collector. All he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"

"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"

"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm going to get screwed!"

***

An old guy walks into a bar and the bartender asks for ID.

"You've got to be kidding," he said. "I'm almost 60 years old."

The bartender apologized, but said he had to see the license.

The guy showed his ID, then paid and told the bartender to keep the change. "The tip's for carding me," he said.

The bartender put the change in the tip cup. "Thanks," he said. "Works every time."