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emsel

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  1. I think I understand the ethnic conflicts that is effecting Kan's behavior, but his ethnicity isn't the only factor that shut out his inate desire to embrace his feelings and desires. I wrote a note earlier in which I explain I understand the cultural inhibitions, as my partner is from an Asian background that is similiar to Kan's and we have discussed the cultural inhibitions that he suffered during his younger years, before he came out to himself. From my own experience, growing up in the 40's and 50's (yes,I'm pushing 80), when American society didn't have room for gay activities, in fact, I thought I was the only one who experienced such feelings. I spent (wasted?)years denying my inate sexuality to myself. If I did accosionally have an encounter, I would spend the next months hating myself for submitting to my inner desires. I was convinced homosexuality was wrong. In your story, it seems that neither Kan nor Beau nor James suffer from any pressures from current culture, which is an indicator of the progress made in this country. ( I must admit, I'm somewhat jealous, if only I had grown up today). Nevertheless, it seems there has to be some doubts that young people feel as they reach sexual maturity and becoming an adult.
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