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Everything posted by RichEisbrouch
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“When you got to the sidewalk,” Ben continued, “did you say anything else to the driver?” “No,” Officer Martel replied. “I just put him in a position where they were next to each other, facing the street.” “When you say ‘Put him in a position,’ what do you mean?” “I asked them to stand approximately three feet apart on the sidewalk and face the street.” “Had the passenger reached the sidewalk before you got there?”
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You're still expecting that "Gotcha," and that's interesting because it tells me what readers want to see, and it's important to remember that. But remember how new Ben is at this. And he's not the polished, fictional Perry Mason. He's mainly trying to be thorough and persuade his jury.
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“Getting back to training officers,” Ben asked Officer Martel, “did they give you examples of how to make arrests?” “We went over theoretical situations.” “Can you tell us about one of them... that you think might apply?” Ben glanced at Amanda, to see if that was again ambiguous. She simply nodded, encouraging him to go ahead. As did Dorothy. Meanwhile, Officer Martel started to answer. “I remember one example in particular. ‘If you observe some
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You're right: having patience is often necessary in this kind of book.
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Ben had just put Officer Martel on the stand, and he began with the usual questions. “Can you give us your full name, please?” “Eric Oliver Martel.” “Have you ever been known by any other names?” “No.” “How old are you?” “Thirty-three.” “Have you had time to talk with your counsel and discuss the nature and purposes of this trial?” “Yes.” “And y
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Yep, well: assuring Jessica Seong's thoroughness and Gene's lack of defensiveness. If Ben didn't want that kind of information out there, he wouldn't have asked those questions or let Gene answer if Amanda had asked. He's trying to let the jury see how personally the police treatment affected Gene, though Ben knows that could boomerang because he's bringing sex into the courtroom. We'll see.
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The highlights of Dr. Jessica Seong’s testimony: “Gene De Wijk first came to me less than a week after his arrest. He’d never seen a psychologist or psychiatrist before, except as part of a routine examination before he went into the Navy. So he asked if I thought the hypnosis I sometimes use as part of my therapy might help him sort through and recover some of his memories. I said, ‘We could try,’ and those thoughts later formed the base of his testimony.” “The
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Yep, an interesting case: everyone's doing good work.
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“When you arrived at the police station,” Amanda asked Gene, “did anything unusual occur as you and Mr. Herrick were taken from the car?” Ben thought to object, on the grounds that there was no way Gene would know what was “usual.” But it was minor, so he let it go. “No,” Gene said. “Nothing happened.” “Were you taken inside the station?” “Yes.” “Were you taken to the booking window?” “I guess t
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Yep, this chapter may seem even slower because we're familiar with what happens. But the fun is seeing that from a slightly different point of view -- and under gentle attack
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“It was just Shaun’s impression that the police car was following us,” Gene said. “And when was the first time,” Amanda asked, “that he... or you... noticed the police car was behind you?” “As I said... he did. It was just before we turned on Laurel from Ventura Place.” “Did he notice whether the car followed you from the Hayloft?” “I could only assume so. I don’t know.” “Why would you assume that?”
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Thanks. It's a weird piece. By this point in the book, the reader knows what's happened to Gene, so what's going to happen, but the point of view keeps shifting -- slightly. And I don't know how long that will keep people's attention.
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Amanda let it drop. Maybe she knew to keep sex out of it, too. “How long were you at the Hayloft?” she asked, instead. “Do you remember when you arrived?” “I believe it was somewhere before midnight,” Gene said. “Approximately?” “Well, if it’s a dozen miles, and I drove by freeway... which I did. At that hour... with relatively light late-night traffic... and on a holiday... It’s probably only took twenty minutes. And if I left the party around
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Thanks. And this being 1985, even in the liberal, San Fernando Valley section of Los Angeles, they're both easing around Gene's being gay.
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Amanda Aguilar began her examination of Gene De Wijk according to form. “Please state your name.” “Gene De Wijk. Eugene Daniel De Wijk.” “Could you please repeat your last name and pronounce it carefully for us?” “De Veck. It’s almost the same as Van Wyck, if you know the parkway.” “I’m afraid I don’t.” “It’s in New York... Queens... not far from where I grew up... Only they pronounce the American W.”
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Ben stood in front of his desk in a small courtroom in the Van Nuys courthouse. It was the same courthouse but not the same room where Gene had been arraigned, and – soon after – his case had been dismissed eight-and-a-half months before. After a moment of acknowledging Dorothy Washington – the judge – Amanda Aguilar – the city attorney – and the jury, Ben began. “Your honor.” He nodded to Dorothy – who he’d appeared in front of once before. “Counsel.” He nodded at Amanda Aguila
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Again, thanks. And the writing gets more traditional from here.
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Thanks. I wanted it there, but I'm still afraid it will put readers to sleep. I'm also making readers work harder in this book than in In The Plan. That was conventionally narrated. This time, the readers are closer to being members of the jury.
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Ben’s research: The Hayloft: Ben knew the bar from occasionally stopping by there, especially to see an old movie. But he certainly wasn’t in the place as often as Gene, and Ben was curious to see how it might seem to outsiders, like members of the jury. From The Voice Los Angeles: THE HAYLOFT – 11818 Ventura Boulevard. After 17 years (March celebrated their anniversary) the Hayloft is still one of the most warm hearted, comfortable, and dedicated-to-traditions bars in
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“Of course, it’s harassment,” Gene insisted. “Unfortunately, especially in this case, that can’t be proved,” Ben Carleson pointed out. “They’re not even mentioning the bar.” Gene and Ben were having lunch in a Studio City deli, not far from where Ben rented a small office – desk space really – in a firm that needed all the financial help it could get. But so did Ben. He was only a year out of UCLA Law School and had more recently passed the difficult California
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“I saw him lying face down,” Gene said. “Do you know why he was lying face down?” Jessica asked. “To sleep.” “Just to go to sleep?” “To sleep on the floor.” “OK.” “And there... there were boots outside... loud boots... outside the cell. I remember when I was in the cell, I could hear... I... I think I slept for a little, and then I awoke, and there was... a lot of talking and things being said.
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Thanks. Be interesting to hear how you thinks this works out.
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"Why bother?" Gene asked. “OK,” Jessica replied, calmly. “Why bother to say anything?” “The pictures are being taken?” “Yes.” “Has anyone told you you were under arrest?” “They’re turning my head. ‘Get in there... Get over here... Sit down.’ Turning my head. All the directions. I’m out.” “All right, Gene. Has anyone told you that you were under arrest yet?” “No.
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Yep. Less flippant than my light-weight stuff, but in the same style as In The Plan. That makes sense, seeing both books share a central lawyer. And there's some occasional banter coming,when Ben and Gene are more relaxed. As usual, thanks for reading along.
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“And then what happened?” Jessica asked. Gene was still under hypnosis. "They came to our car," he told her. “The police?” “Yes.” “Do you remember how many?” “Two... there were two... the one with the mustache.” “The one with the mustache? What does the other one look like?” The other one is boyish... Not young... neither of them. Neither of them is young.” “OK
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