If Only In My Dreams - 1. Chapter 1

It was one of those mid April days where the sun is shining all morning long, making you think you don't need an umbrella or a jacket, and just before it's time for you to go home...Armageddon! My dad teaches at my high school, so I had to make the decision to either walk home in the pouring rain and get soaked, or wait until 6 when my dad was ready to go and then I could catch a ride in the 'Daddy-mobile'. I was staying, no contest. Not because of the rain so much, but because it meant I'd get a chance to stick around and see...him. Perhaps I should start from the beginning...

My name is Jeremy and I'm 16 years old. I've never really been one of those weird prima donna guys who's always in front of a mirror checking out my hair and my clothes and my ego every minute of the day. I just get up, get dressed, and go to school. And for some reason, the ladies think I'm cute anyway. In fact, they often talk to me in class, passing up the guys who spent hours trying to get their attention. I guess it's just my little natural beauty shining through...or whatever. I'm about 5' 8", and pretty slim at 130 pounds. I've got short dark brown hair, soft, but spiked out. People usually say that I remind them of that kid from the movie "Air Bud"...I think that's a compliment. I try to be normal, like everybody else, really I do. I tell the same jokes, ogle the same women, and basically try to fit in wherever I can, but the fact that I have an affection for my own sex kind of prevents me from totally feeling at home here. I just don't feel as attached to them, I'm like a kid playing a sport I don't really enjoy, the one watching everyone else have candy while I'm sitting here sucking on a cough drop. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy with who I am, but since I don't have enough faith in the people around me to understand, I'll just keep it to myself for now. But this isn't just about me...it's also about him.

He is the reason I rise and fall every single day. He is what makes a weekday better than the weekends and makes me enjoy coming to this dreary hell hole called school. He is the major heartache that fills me with a mix of love and hate, pleasure and pain, optimism and doubt, all at the same time. His name is Steven, and he's been the apple of my eye all year. I've practically been stalking him since the first day I saw him. I always feel so stupid, like my feet won't work, my voice won't work, my head starts to spin, and a task as simple and common as breathing becomes a chore. Can you imagine if we actually had any CLASSES together? The only time I get to see him is in the hallway between periods, through a giant horde of running, screaming school kids and stuck up teachers. I run out of class after every period and wander the halls, hoping to catch a glimpse of him, just a glimpse. Just enough of a fix to fill my heart and keep me sighing until the next time I lay eyes on him. Steven is a bit shorter than me, 5' 3 1/2" to be exact. I told you I was stalking him. Funny what you can learn about other people when you ask the right questions. He was 16 too, but exactly 3 months, 20 days, 6 hours, and 12 seconds younger than I was. Don't ask. He had this awesome mass of shiny light brown hair that just made you want to stare at it all day long, cut to medium length in a preppy style. I couldn't even tell you exactly what celebrity I'd compare him with, none of them seem to do his beauty justice. He had the most hypnotic green bedroom eyes that anyone's ever seen. One day I saw him outside and the sunlight hit his eyes just right, and they sparkled and glowed with such brilliance that it nearly drove me to orgasm on the school's front lawn. His lips looked soooo soft, so remarkably smooth and fresh. I doubt that kissing Steven would be anything less than a religious experience. His face was crystal clear, smooth as glass, without a single blemish anywhere. His skin was filled with a sexy tan than made his whole body shine with a slick golden aura. His shy smile could brighten the darkest day, and his slim body was usually draped in white t-shirts and fancy sweaters, travelling down to a pair of khaki pants that displayed the finest teen butt ever built by God's gracious hands. I didn't even know him all that well, but I've never been more in love. It would probably never work out though. There were little differences that kept us apart, like I was a night person and he...he didn't like me. You know, little things like that.

I tried to speak to him, time and time again, but I either didn't get the chance, got the chance and chickened out, got the chance and screwed it up, or he just shouted "get out of the way" as he rushed past me. Did it hurt? Omigod, beyond words. But when you love somebody as much as I loved Steven, you keep trying anyway. Even his nasty little comments were better than nothing, at least he was talking to me. He was always carrying this book bag with him everywhere he went, he never let go of it. He held it close to his side at all times and I never saw him open it, not even at his locker. I often wondered what was in that bag, but he did everything short of handcuffing it to his wrist. I guess it just wasn't my place to know. One day I asked him why he carried that bag everywhere he went, and he said...he said...well, let's not go into what he said, but it wasn't friendly. Let's just say that I had myself a good cry that afternoon. Then came the day that hurt me more than anything. I heard people talking about Steven and naturally joined in to see what other tidbits I could find out about my dream boy. They actually said that he knew who I was! He knew my name, what classes I took, and everything! I was almost overjoyed when they told me what he thought of me. He said I was "annoying." Annoying. Not cute, or funny, or smart, or cool...but annoying. I turned around, my face flushed and red, and sat down at my desk until the final bell rang. That was it, it was over. I had lost. Steven didn't like me...at all. He didn't think about me, he didn't dream about me, and the only way I'd ever be able to share any physical contact with him was if he just one day decided to kick my ass for being so...annoying. That became the single most disgusting word in the English language for me, and if I wasn't such a zombie that day, I probably would have bawled my eyes out. The worst thing in the world is realizing that someone you are willing to give yourself so readily to, doesn't feel the same way. All those days of longing for Steven, thinking of Steven, and jerking off over Steven...was just a waste of my time. It was as though the color in my world had been faded and whisked away to a place just beyond my reach. How can something that was once so wonderful, hurt me so much?

A few days had past, or maybe it was a few weeks, who knows? Time didn't matter all that much to me anymore. It was one of those April days where it went from sunshine to hurricane in a matter of minutes, and I was going to catch a ride with my dad. I knew Steven hated me, I knew that seeing him again would only hurt me more and I'd only be torturing myself, but I went to watch him at basketball practice anyway. I don't know why I did it, but maybe, like 40 or 50 years from now, my heart will heal and I'll be able to get on with my life. I watched him and only him run up and down that court in his gym shorts and t-shirt. I never took my eyes off of him, hoping that maybe once, just once, he'd look up into the bleachers and see me sitting there, and then he'd feel bad for what he did to me. It's not like I was asking for endless hours of sex or anything, just a kiss, a smile, hold my hand for Christ's sake! Anything to say, "Hey Jeremy, I don't hate you." 'Sigh'...what a world.

After what seemed like an eternity, 6 PM finally rolled around and my dad came down to pick me up. We walked outside to get the car, and there he was. Steven was standing there in the rain with his bag over his head trying to keep dry. It wasn't working. My dad told me to wait there and he left me alone with him, the two of us getting soaked together. He wasn't looking at me, but he had to know I was there. I sneaked a few peeks at his profile, making sure he didn't catch me looking and beat the shit out of me. Then my dad would stop him and get him in trouble with the school which would only guarantee an even worse beating later. Some of his teammates walked by and he said, in that sexy teenage voice of his, "Can one of you guys give me a ride? My mom's on call at the hospital and I don't have my house keys." But they all said they couldn't do it. Some friends huh? Steven stood there in the rain, shivering and basically catching pneumonia right in front of me. I wanted to just hold him, to give him my body heat and make him well, to shelter him from the rain and make everything all right. But the second I opened my mouth to say something, my dad startled me by honking the horn. I hesitated a for a second, hoping that he would ask ME for a ride, but he didn't. So, feeling rejected yet again, I got in the back seat.

Dad to the rescue, "Hey, Steven? How are you getting home?"

Steven said, "I don't know. I can't go home until 10 o'clock, my mom's on call again."

"Well you can't just walk around in the rain for four hours. Come on, you can stay with us until your mom gets home." Was my dad saying what I thought he was staying? Was Steven coming to MY house?

I saw him look at me in the back seat and he said, "That's alright man. I'll find a way home." But my dad just told him to stop being silly and get in. So finally, after breaking my heart about a billion more times by refusing the ride, he got in the back seat next to me. Geez, would he rather catch his death of cold and walk around in the pouring rain than spend time with me? What did I ever do to him? I wanted to cut him off, I wanted to feel the same hate for him that he felt for me, but the second he sat next to me, dripping rain water from his sexy brown locks, his shirt clinging to his flat teenage chest, his dark brown nipples hard and erect, poking through...I fell in love all over again. I watched as a single drop of water ran down from his hair, down his smooth cheek, and then trace a line down his long and slender neck, disappearing into the collar of his shirt. It was enough to get me hard immediately.

I tried to keep quiet, but eventually decided to say something anyway. "So...nobody saw this rain storm coming, huh?"

Steven just kind of looked at me, then he turned his head and looked out of the window. "Nope."

"...Probably should have brought an umbrella, huh?" I said, trying to get him to say something, anything.

"Yep." He replied, and he turned even more towards the window, turning his back on me and letting me know in so many words that he didn't want to talk to me. Feeling hurt, I decided to just stop trying and take some enjoyment out of knowing he was sitting next to me. I mean hey, it was as close as I was ever gonna get.

We got to my house and my dad collected his giant stack of papers and folders from the front seat. We walked in and Steven took off his shoes in the doorway to keep from dripping on the rug. His socks were soaked through and he took them off too. Seeing his bare feet turned me on to no end and I found myself wanting to kiss every inch of them. I was just so obsessed with his very presence that it made me feel like crying tears of joy. But then I remembered the word "annoying", and the tears' purpose would change from joy to sorrow in a matter of seconds. My dad gave us both towels and we dried off enough to come into the living room. I turned on the TV and sat on the couch. Surprisingly, Steven came to sit beside me. I didn't say anything, didn't want to ruin the moment. So I just sat there and for a quick minute, I pretended that Steven and I were friends. Just two buddies hanging out and watching a little TV. It felt nice, I just wish I could talk to him. Nah, why get greedy? I'll just enjoy his company, catch a few quick peeks at his adorable face, and later I'll sniff the cushion he sat on and jack off until my nose bleeds. End of story.

"Do you have anything to eat? I'm a little hungry."

It almost took me a second to figure out that he was actually talking to me. It caught me off guard.

"Um...yeah, sure. We've got some pizza left over from yesterday." I said, then I just sat there and looked in his eyes, his gorgeous eyes.

We stared at each other for a few brief moments, and then, just when I thought we were making that special connection, Steven said, "Well?"

"Well what?"

"Can I have some?"

"Have some what?"

"Some pizza...helloooo?" That's when I realized that my magic moment had been a fake. Great, before he thought I was an idiot, now he knows for sure. I got up and brought him back a few microwaved slices of pizza and we sat back and watched back to back reruns of the Simpsons. We were actually laughing together during some of the jokes, and it felt good, but as soon as the commercial break came on, we both returned to that silence. That unmerciful silence that reminded me how much he didn't want to be here with me. I was beginning to reach my limit, I really was.

My dad suddenly entered the room with his coat on. He said he left his grading sheets and some other stuff and had to go back and get it before it was locked up for the night. Steven jumped up and said he had to really get going. "Don't be ridiculous, Steven. It's still pouring out there and it's only 7 o'clock. Just stay here, I'll be back in about 45 minutes. Jeremy here will keep you company." Yeah, how was I gonna entertain this sweet prince of mine? It's not like I had any interesting hobbies or anything. It's not like he actually wanted to talk to me. As soon as my dad left, Steven just kind of looked at me and sat on the very far end of the couch away from me and glued his eyes back to the TV. I sat there for five whole minutes, wondering what I had done wrong. What was wrong with me? How can he hate me when I love him sooo much? Doesn't he feel it, can't he feel the attraction, the unconditional desire that I have in my heart? I'd give anything just to have the chance to prove my love to him. ANYTHING! Why couldn't he understand that? Then I stopped feeling sorry for myself and the answer came to me in a blaze of fire. It wasn't me at all...Steven was just an asshole! That's all there was to it! Who needs him?

Finally I just got up and said, "Look, that's it. I've tried, you know? I really tried! But if you hate me so much, why don't you just go home? Go ahead, my dad's gone, you obviously don't want to be here, nothing's stopping you...go! If you don't want to talk to me, if you hate me that much, then I don't even want you here! So why don't you just go play in the rain!" It hurt, God it hurt, but I said it and walked away to my room. Steven looked surprised to say the least, but I didn't care. I hid in my room and shut the door, waiting to hear the front door close when he left so I'd know when it was safe to cry. But instead, I heard a light knocking at my door. Steven peeked in and then opened the door the rest of the way.

He just kind of stared at me for a second, he had this strange look on his face, something I couldn't really describe. He took a deep breath, then he said, "Why did you say that?"

"Oh, now you want to talk to me? Whoopee."

"Jeremy...just because I don't speak to you all the time...it doesn't mean.."

"No, you actually speak to me quite a bit. You say 'out of my way jerk' and 'leave me alone' and a whole bunch of other nice things. YOU...hate ME? I don't know what I was thinking."

Steven paused for a long time, then he leaned against the wall and sounded like he was getting teary eyed himself. "You...you don't really think that I hate you...do you?"

"You do! You tell everybody how much you don't like me, you never want anything to do with me!"

"You really think I hate you?"

"Why shouldn't I? You treat me like shit."

"I just do that because...if people knew...look...I don't hate you, okay?"

"You said you feel 'annoyed' by me!"

"I don't feel annoyed by you."

"Well then what DO you feel?"

"I don't KNOW what I feel!!! I don't know! I just know that it's really...weird and wrong, and as long as you're around, it's never going to go away!" Steven shouted.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, a stray tear falling from my eye.

"I don't know what it means. I don't know anything anymore. I just...I just don't know how to act around you. You make me feel..."

Steven stopped in mid sentence, choking back a sob, and slinked down to the floor, his back sliding down the wall. He covered his face with his arms resting on his knees, and began to cry. "I don't want to be a fag! I don't want to be queer! Ohhh God, this sucks...this really fucking sucks!"

The whole thing just didn't make sense to me, to either one of us. I didn't know what to say, what to feel, all I could do was walk over to him and sit next to him on the floor. I threw an arm around him and he struggled with me for a few minutes, trying to get me to stop. He was crying out loud now and flailing his arms trying to get away from me. "Leave me alone. Why can't you just go away? Everything was so simple before you came along. And now I'm all fucked in the head and I'm confused. Just leave me alone..." But I wasn't leaving him, not now. I just struggled with him for a while and finally, he collapsed in a fit of tears and his arms wrapped around me, hugging me tightly. I hugged him back and rubbed my fingers over his smooth brown hair. He cried into my chest and was sobbing quietly, "I don't hate you Jeremy, I don't hate you."

I leaned over and kissed him on the top of the head, his hair filling my nostrils with the sweetest scent of youth. I continued to smooth his hair over and over again, slowly stroking it from the top of his head, down slowly to the back of his neck. I became aware of the fact that Steven wasn't crying anymore, and he was just sitting there in my arms, rocking gently back and forth. I suddenly realized exactly who I was holding here, and my mind became flooded with the entire weight of the situation. Steven, the boy I have loved for so long, was here, in my house, alone. He was in my arms, crying, telling me that he was gay, telling me that he didn't hate me...telling me....

"I love you Jeremy." He said, softly moaning the words into my chest, his voice turned raspy from his tears. I leaned my head back, taken back by the power of his words. I felt tears fall from my eyes and I whispered softly in his ear.

"I love you too Steven, and there's nothing weird or wrong about it."

Steven never looked up at me, never met my eyes with his adorable gaze, he just simply curled up in my arms and we sat there against the wall. Too scared to move, too scared to sit still. I continued to rub Steven's hair ever so softly and I could feel his tender hands rubbing small circles on my belly. His hands were so incredibly gentle, they made me tremble with his skillful touch. I tried to hold it back, but my six inches would not be contained and quickly rose to it's full length. I hoped Steven wouldn't notice, I mean sometimes erections, even in front of the one you love, can be the most embarrassing thing in the world. But what happened next took me to new heights of passion. I felt a little nibble, a slight pinch, and I felt Steven gently kissing and licking my nipples through my shirt. At the same time, I felt his hand slowly move downward, from my belly, to the inside of my thigh, then he glided it up to my erection. He barely touched it, his fingers just grazing its length with the slightest pressure. His hands were shaking, he was so timid and fragile at that moment, I just wanted to give him my life, my soul, anything to repay him for this wonderful feeling inside that he was giving me. He continued to nibble at my nipples and his hand finally got up enough courage to give my aching member a light squeeze. A chill went up my spine like a bolt of lightning and I gasped out loud, startling us both. Steven's head popped up and he looked me in the eyes. His big green pools seemed to shimmer and dance with the beating of his heart. The room fell silent except for the light tapping of the rain at my bedroom window. He moved closer, just a half inch at a time. We had wanted this for so long, and now that we had this moment, it terrified us. We leaned in closer still, until our lips grazed each other, and then without another second's hesitation, we kissed. I couldn't have hoped for more, to say that kissing him was a religious experience was beyond an understatement. His mouth parted a little, and a puff of his sweet breath entered my mouth. I was dizzy with love, weak and strong simultaneously. My heart beat so fast that it nearly choked me with it's enthusiastic contractions. As we shared our sweet kiss, my hand ran down his soft brown hair again, down the back of his neck, past his shoulders, and down to rub his firm back lovingly as he melted in my arms. His tongue made a small and frightened attempt to enter my mouth, and the second he did it, he pulled back out quickly, hoping I wouldn't be grossed out by it. I wasn't. I responded by trying the same, and soon we had our tongues wrapping and writhing together in harmony, our saliva mixing between us, our hot breath passing back and forth and driving us wild. His hand wandered back down to my erection and rubbed it more confidently this time. We had only been kissing, but I wasn't sure how much of this I could take. He broke our kiss and nestled his head back into my chest, looking down at my boner tenting out my pants. The strain of the fabric was almost enough to drive me crazy. He kept rubbing it for a while and then whispered in a sexy, lust filled, teen voice, "Can I touch it?"

What was I gonna say? No? I reached down and undid my zipper and pulled down my underwear. My cock sprang out and was decorated by a small dot of shiny pre-cum on the tip. His hand made contact and he just held it for a minute. "This feels cool. I never felt somebody elses before." He gave it a few slow strokes and my legs trembled from the sensation. What made it worse, was that Steven kept talking, his shaky, lovestruck voice kept reminding me that it was him, it was Steven touching me, the boy of my dreams. He kept saying things about my cock, like, "It's soooo warm." and, "It's so hard, but kind of soft at the tip." He said he liked the way it felt in his hands...hell I liked the way it felt in his hands. He liked bringing me to the edge and then stopping before I came. He loved to feel it pulse and twitch in his hands, the torture was unbearable, and I wished it would go on forever. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes for a second and he stopped stroking. I felt him begin to shake gently again, like a scared rabbit, then without warning, I felt a warm moist sensation surround my cock as he took it into his mouth. I nearly screamed when I felt his tongue encircle the head! He took me down to the base and I felt his soft lips wrap around me, brushing against my testicles at the bottom. I couldn't take anymore! The teasing, the rubbing, the touching, the kiss, it was all too much for me, and he only got to the third bob when I tensed up and had the strongest orgasm of my life. My hips raised off of the floor and I came spurt after spurt of hot semen into his mouth while holding on to the back of his head. I was still squirting when my tip got excessively sensitive and while Steven was swallowing, he accidently scraped it with his back teeth. I almost jumped a foot in the air and my whole body shook and spasmed from the explosive climax. When I calmed down and regained my sight, I saw Steven sitting a few feet away from me, amazed at my reaction to his blow job.

Steven giggled a little and said, "Hehehe, was it that good?"

"Fuckin' A it was!"

"Thanks," He said shyly, "It's my first, you know."

There was a short moment of silence and I could see the outline of a sizeable hard on in Steven's pants. My mouth watered for it and I stared at it unashamed, drawn to the delicious image before me. He wanted it too, but didn't want to push me, so he just sort of sat there and let me look at it.

"Come here." I said.

"What?" He smiled, blushing slightly and looking away from me. God he was so shy. That was such a turn on!

"Just...come here."

Steven grinned timidly and crawled over to me on all fours. I slid down on to my back and let him hover above me, our lips meeting in a sweet kiss once again, before he lowered himself to grind into me between my legs. I moved my hands down to his squeezable ass and kneaded the soft cheeks playfully as he thrust his hips into me time and time again. He was propped up on his elbows and his breathing was getting short, his moans were getting louder, so I decided to turn him on even more. I slid further underneath him, scooting down between his pushes and pumps, and lifted his shirt to kiss and bite at his dime sized nipples. He gasped and sighed over me as I placed angel kisses over his entire chest. I loved to lick at his smooth skin, tracing my tongue from one nipple to the other. Then I slid down more to stick my tongue into his navel, forcing him to writhe and giggle. Feeling his stomach muscles tighten against my lips from his quiet laughs only made me attack it with more ferocity. Then I scooted down even lower and rubbed my face back and forth across the front of his khaki pants. He was so hot at that point that he laid all the way down on the floor, placing the entire weight of his body on my head as he started grinding erotically into my face. He humped and pushed into me time and time again, his hips waving back and forth, in and out, pushing his cloth covered cock into my face, smashing my nose, bathing me in his body heat. I couldn't hardly breathe, but I didn't need air to survive anymore...I had love.

Steven worked back and forth over my face for a few minutes before finally sitting up on my chest. I saw him start to undo the top button on his pants and I became extremely anxious to taste his sexy flavor. I scooted down an inch or two and began to lick at his spongy nutsack through his pants. I darted my tongue out as hard as I could and Steven moaned and whimpered desperately, trying hard to get his pants off as fast as he could. He was in such a hurry that his hands fumbled at the button and a look of animal lust covered his face. I grabbed his ass again and squeezed hard as he finally got the pants open, and he raised up enough to finally get his khakis and briefs down to his thighs. He had a beautiful fleshy cock that was a bright red color at the tip. But I didn't get much time to look at it, because Steven shoved the shaft down into my mouth and began fucking my face hard. My lips and tongue worked their magic as he slid his warm meat in and out of me. His balls were lightly tapping against my chin and I was loving it. He was getting close and whimpering with every thrust, his breathing was getting louder, and I knew he was close. His ass clenched itself in my hands and his legs tightened up. He came forcefully down my throat and I swallowed it down greedily, never wasting a drop. It took a few moments before he relaxed and rolled off of me, and we just laid there on my bedroom floor, breathing hard and enjoying the greatest moment of our teen lives.

After another five minutes of staring at the ceiling, and another ten minutes of kissing that almost suffocated us both, we got dressed and went back to the couch to watch TV. Then, out of nowhere, Steven kissed me on the cheek and said, "I want to show you something."

That's when he reached behind the couch and pulled out his bag, that bag that he carried with him everywhere, the mystery case. And for the first time, I saw him open it...in front of ME. He took out an old ratty notebook and handed it to me. "What's this?" I asked.

"It's a book of poetry."

"Did YOU write these?"

"Yes...I wrote them..." Then he leaned closer and kissed me again on the cheek before whispering, "...I wrote them about you."

I could just die! I opened the book, and sure enough, there was poem after beautiful poem with my name. They had titles like, 'Jeremy My Love', 'Crazy About My Jeremy', 'The Boy In The Halls', and 'Love I Can Never Know'. They were all so sweet, so emotionally moving. I never could have imagined that something so beautiful, so incredibly magical, could ever be a part of my life. I tried to read as many as I could, but with Steven kissing at my neck and nibbling gently at my earlobe, I only got through about five of them. As the rain fell down in buckets outside, as the lights flickered with every strike of lightning, and the windows rattled with every crack of thunder, two boys who had never known about the power of love, shared many sweet kisses and tender touches on that living room couch. And nothing would ever tear them apart again.

We hadn't even made it to my bedroom, we barely made it past the front door, before Me and Steven were kissing and twirling like crazy. God, it felt so good, it was like releasing 16 years of built up sexual frustration in a single kiss, and I wouldn't want to share it with anyone but Steven. It seemed like we lived for each other now, like every moment that we spent apart was one of anticipation. I couldn't stop thinking about him, dreaming about him, I couldn't even stop saying his name when I talked to him, I loved him that much. We still didn't have any classes together, so it was hard to catch a glimpse of him during school, but he always said that he'd just meet me at my house after school and we could have a little fun. Wow, he was so delicious.

In the past week, we had sex more times than I could count, and every one was different. A different emotion, a different orgasm, a different feeling altogether. I thought about it all day long and sighed to myself out loud. I didn't even pay attention in class anymore, what could the system possibly teach me that could be more important, more magical, than true love? I just couldn't get enough, and if it was possible for me to get my fill of him, I'd just keep going, over indulging myself with his awesome light.

Steven and I continued kissing and spinning all the way to my room, our lips smacking as we mashed our faces together in a tight sensual union. My heart was inflating to the point of bursting with passion as I held Steven close, his broad chest held close to mine. We reached the 'safety' of my bedroom and closed my door. I was sure that my dad wouldn't be home until 6 PM, but I could never be too careful. Catching me butt naked with Steven in my arms might be a little hard to explain. What was I going to say? We were pretending to be game show Chippendale dancers for some kid's surprise birthday party? Nah, that would just be silly! Steven was such a good kisser. He had this way of moving his lips in little...circles..or something that was just so erotic. His tongue felt so soft and wet in my mouth, and we would make out until we could basically tell what the other boy had for lunch. I lifted my shirt over my head and he did the same, and I laid on top of him bare chested, the two of us grinding our crotches together through our pants. Steven's hands went wild, rubbing up and down my back while pushing up into me from the bed. We rolled over and he kissed me deeply as he threw his leg over me, getting on top. Our breathing was getting loud, and I was already dizzy with lust, whimpering from the amount of pleasure rushing through my body all at once. Steven lifted up on his knees and elbows, hovering over me for a second, leaning in to kiss me gently a few times, but pulling back every so slightly to tease me. This maddening break of our passionate body contact almost drove me insane. I hung onto his slim hips, trying to pull him back down on top of me, trying to feel his delicate body weight on top of me once again, but my hands almost slid off of his frictionless, baby smooth skin.

"Free me." He whispered in my ear. It was by far the sexiest tone of whisper I had ever heard in my entire life. I reached my hands down and started to undo the belt on his khakis. Steven closed his eyes and waited with anticipation, and then I freed his straining cock from his pants, massaging it with both hands. He shivered and laid his head on my shoulders, kissing my neck and letting both of his hands travel down to my zipper. He was still on his knees and let his head balance him over me as his gentle fingers grabbed a hold of my cock slowly and brought it out into the air. I lifted my hips so that he could slide my jeans down past my knees, and then I used my hands to pull his down over that cute little hump that was his ass. He had the most perfect ass I had ever seen, with the cutest little tan line. It was awesome, heart shaped, soft, round, tight...I could go on all day. Grabbing it was like holding a water balloon filled with warm milk. It melted in my hands and the skin was beyond smooth. He had the sexiest little cup at the bottom of it too, and the crack was just awe inspiring. Steven finally came back down on me, letting us touch again without our clothes to restrict us from the ultimate sensations of love, and his ass became my plaything as he groaned and whispered in my ear. I was so close, so enraptured in the feelings that coursed through my body, that I nearly jumped a full foot in the air when the doorbell rang.

Naturally, my first instinct was to ignore it. Steven stopped kissing me for a second, but I whispered, "Forget it. They'll go away." Then he smiled and went back to kissing me. We were feeling the orgasm rising between us, getting stronger and stronger, the moment of truth was almost upon us. Then the bell rang AGAIN! This time twice. We were trying to ignore t, if the bastard would wait a few more seconds I'd be finished! Steven and I couldn't get our rhythm back and this was definitely spoiling the mood. Then the guy starts knocking on the door...like I couldn't hear the bell dumb ass! Steven and I both moaned out loud in frustration and he rolled off of me while I yanked my pants up angrily and stomped my way to the back door. As I passed by the fridge, I noticed a note from my dad on the fridge. It said, "Jeremy - The repair man is coming in today to fix the dishwasher, be sure to let him in." Dammit! And sure enough, as I looked out of the window, there was a large man with dorky glasses and a thick moustache peering in. I opened the door and tried my best to hide my annoyance with the guy, but as he came in and started talking to me, I couldn't help but be a little disgusted with the intrusion. After a few minutes of being in the kitchen showing him where everything was, Steven had gotten dressed and came walking around the corner to see what had happened. The repair guy said hello to him and Steven smiled sweetly at him. I'm glad he had put his shirt back on too, because I was standing there in only a pair of jeans and socks, and he might have known something was up if we were both 'topless'.

The guy was one of those really friendly guys who just annoyed you with pointless conversation of his life and his truck and his wife and his experiences with a guy at the used car lot and any other meaningless bullshit that he could think of. I think Steven could see me getting angrier and angrier and he started giggling at my display of discontent. The repair guy never seemed to pick up on it though, he just chatterboxed away about his school days and his college days and the time some Mafia guy spit on his pizza in Chicago while Steven laughed and laughed at the look on my face. I think he was actually enjoying this more than the sex a few minutes ago.

Steven walked just around the corner where I could see him but the repair guy couldn't, and he started doing this thing with his tongue that nearly made me faint. It was, like, rippling or something. I was getting hard quickly and had to turn to the side to hide it from the repair guy. I mouthed the words, "Knock it off." to Steven, but it only made him laugh silently to himself. He kept doing it, his tongue turning me on in every possible way, and I tried not to look, but even when my back was turned, I knew he was still doing it. Finally, I couldn't take anymore and told the repair guy I'd be back in a minute. As soon as I took a step towards Steven, he laughed out loud and ran back to my bedroom. I chased him inside and tackled him on the bed pinned him down while he giggled and squirmed beneath me. I had never had so much fun with anybody as I did with Steven, my best friend, and my lover.

Steven sat up under me and I rested on his lap while he leaned back on his arms, and our lips met again in a passionate kiss. I had been teased long enough, even with the repair guy in the other room, this had to happen and it had to happen now before my balls exploded. I laid down on top of Steven and put my head up under his shirt to kiss and nibble at his tiny erect nipples. They seemed to shrink even more as they got harder and they were just so cute. I licked every inch of his chest, letting my tongue linger in the small canyon between his growing teenage pecs. Just then, I heard the repair guy call out my name. Dammit!

"WHAT???" I shouted.

"Do you have a hammer in the house?" He asked.

"In the drawer."

"Which one?"

"The one next to the fridge!"

"This one?" He said, opening the silverware drawer which was nowhere even remotely close to the fridge. Dammit! I jumped up and stomped into the kitchen at the speed of light. I reached in the drawer and slapped the hammer in his hand, quickly turning around to go back to the bedroom. "Thanks." He said, still not seeming to notice how much I hated him for even being there.

I went back into my room to see Steven giggling again. "You're really getting a kick out of this aren't you?" I said, almost angry at him for finding it funny.

"Hehehehe...yeah actually, I am. You're so cute when you're angry." He said shyly. He reached for me and I climbed on top of him again, our kissing and grinding become almost desperate as we tried to finally achieve a release from this frustration. But, as soon as we were reaching that magical height of passion, the guy called out my name again. This time he needed a screw driver! ARRRRGGH! He was a fucking REPAIR guy! Didn't he bring any tools with him? I didn't even bother trying to explain to him where the screwdriver was, I just walked in and handed it to him, giving him the look of death. I swore that the next tool he asked me for was going to go right through his heart! I stood there for a few seconds, wishing that looks could kill, and asked him through gritted teeth if there was anything else he needed.

"No kiddo, I think that's it. Say, did I ever tell you about the time I won a monkey from the zoo?"

I didn't even stick around for the beginning of that story! I just stormed off and slammed my door hard to see if he'd get the message. Steven was standing behind the door this time and pulled me up against him. We started kissing against the wall and I quickly began to slide down to my knees. Finally, I got my first taste of him as I took his hard meat into my mouth. I licked and sucked at him furiously, trying to finish up before the repair guy called me back to finish his wacky monkey story. Steven was gasping for air, a little surprised at my aggressiveness, and slid down a little to grab a hold of my cock in my pants, jacking me off in time with my sucking. Steven was trying not to moan out loud, his voice coming through in soft whispers and light grunts. His eyes were closed as he felt me out with his loving finger tips. I was so ready for release. This was it, we were both close, so close. Then I felt Steven tighten up and I brought him over the edge. As the first shot of semen hit the back of my throat, the repair guy called me AGAIN! I had my boyfriend's dick shooting off in my mouth, I'm pretty damn close to shooting myself, and this asshole is probably getting ready to ask me for a glass of water!

"Jush a minate..." I tried to say with my mouth full. I could feel some of Steven's cum dribble down my cheeks and it was enough to set me off too! I came hard in Steven's rubbing hands while trying to hold my breath to keep from crying out loud. Ohhhhh it felt so good, and I could swear that I could taste Steven's cock getting sweeter and sweeter in my mouth. We both pulled away from each other at the same time and cleaned up as best we could. Steven patted me on the butt as I walked out of the room to go back to the kitchen.

The repair guy pushed up his glasses and said, "I just wanted to tell you I was finished. Give this paper to your dad and tell him everything's working fine. You and your friend here can get back to playing Colecovision or whatever it is you kid's do now a days." The very thought of this guy actually leaving after we basically had to 'cloak and dagger' our whole afternoon was so incredibly insane and upsetting that I actually had to laugh about it. I was just shocked to say the least. Steven must have heard what he said from the bedroom, because I could hear him laughing too. Finally the guy left and we just used our last half hour together talking and cracking jokes. It was great.

The next day at school went along slowly like it always did. But there was a slight difference this time. I looked around at the kids in my class, in my grade, and they all just seemed like...'less' to me. It's hard to explain, but all the kids that I thought it would be cool to be friends with, that I wanted to hang out and party with, that I admired and wanted to be like, now I looked at them and they might as well have all been the same person. They were predictable, faceless, without any real charm or personality at all. Maybe it was just because I compared them all to Steven in one way or another. And they just didn't add up, hell, half of them didn't even matter anymore. I felt good about just being myself, because if a guy as great as Steven was attracted to me, the REAL me, then I must have done something right. Sure, I still talked to people, but it wasn't like before. I almost felt like I didn't even need anybody else in my life. I even had to be careful when I spoke, because no matter what anybody said I would bring up Steven's name or relate it to some joke that he told me, or something that we talked about. I had to be careful not to say his name too much, or people would definitely think I was obsessed, not that I wasn't.

Then it happened, for the first time since we had been together, I saw Steven in the hallways at school. My heart was instantly lifted and I ran over to his locker to say hello. "Hey man! What's up?"

Steven looked up at me and seemed a little surprised to see me at first, then he shyly said, "...Hi." under his breath and looked around the hallway to see all the kids passing by. It was odd, like he didn't even know me. Maybe he had just had a bad day or something.

"So, are you coming over today?" I said, and then I leaned forward to whisper in his ear, "No annoying repair guy this time." And I snickered heartily.

But Steven seemed to cringe at the fact that I said it out loud. He was slightly cowering away from me all of the sudden and I just didn't get it. I asked him if something was wrong, but he just said, "Look, not here okay. I'll meet you at your place later."

"Well...I can wait for you if you want, we can take the bus together..."

"I said I'll meet you later dude!" He said in a loud whisper. "Now watch out, I've gotta get to class." Then he just walked away. What the hell was that about? Steven was being awfully shifty all of the sudden. Did I do something wrong? Say something wrong? Was it some unrelated problem in his school, or was it me? I spent the rest of the day replaying every minute I had spent with Steven the day before, wondering if I had pissed him off or something. But I couldn't think of one minute that we were alone that he didn't have a smile on his face. Weird. He came over later and I was expecting him to tell me what happened, give me some terrible story about getting an F on a test or a teacher that embarrassed him in front of the whole class or something...but he never brought it up. He was back to his normal self and the two of us had a ball making out and watching TV. I thought that maybe it was just one of those freak occurrences. But I later found out it wasn't.

A few days later, I walked past him in the hall and got pretty much the same treatment. He completely shied away from me and hardly said a word to me at all. He didn't even make eye contact. It was like he didn't want to be associated with me, like he didn't want to be seen with me, and it hurt more than you could ever imagine. Sure, he would come over after school and be all happy and fun, but whenever we were in public, it was the same old shit, and I was getting tired of it fast. Finally, one day I sat in the bleachers while he was at basketball practice, watching him play and trying not to fall in love with him all over again. I had to keep myself focused, it was time to get to the bottom of this. I saw him look at me from the court a few times to see if I was still there, but he just tried to ignore me. That's when the little stinging pain in my gut started to turn to full blown anger and I was determined to find out just what the fuck was going on here.

I caught him after practice walking out with his buddies and asked him if I could talk to him for a minute. "What?" He said.

"Dude, what's the matter with you? Why are you ignoring me all of the sudden, I don't get it?"

"Look, not now okay?" He said, and he started to walk away from me. I grabbed his arm and turned him around so he could talk to me, but he pulled away from me. "What are you doing? Get your hands off me!"

"Steven...what's with you? I just....I just want you to talk to me." I said, my anger reverting back to hurtful emotions and confusion. "If it was something I did, I'm sorry."

"Jeremy...God, can we just talk about this later? I don't want to do this right now."

Why was he doing this? Why was he hurting me like this for no reason? "Steven...please..."

"Later! Alright? Geez!" Then he just walked away. I stood there, watching him run to catch up with his buddies and climb in to their car. As he drove past, I saw him look at me out of the window, and I knew that he could see the hurt on my face, and something told me that he felt it too. I went home feeling alone, like my little dreamworld had been shattered. I guess my perfect boyfriend was just too good to be true, too good to be real. My heart wouldn't stop hurting, even when I tried to laugh, it just wasn't genuine. It felt fake and I couldn't get myself to get over it. I wanted so badly to know what was wrong, wanted to know if I could possibly give Steven anymore of myself to make him like me more. But I had given him my heart and soul, totally, in every way, how could I possibly give him any more? The phone rang and it was Steven on the other end. He said he was coming over, and he sounded all happy and cheerful, like this afternoon had never happened. Was he a schizophrenic or what? I didn't even want to see him right then, but before I could say no, he had hung up and was already on his way. I sulked in he living room until he got there, still baffled at what the hell was happening between us.

The doorbell rang and I let him in, siting on the couch. Steven came in talking and chatting and telling me he had written a new poem just for me on the bus ride over. But it was all a fake. I could tell that he was just trying to dodge the issue and silently make up for what he did to me earlier. I didn't want gifts, I didn't want affection, what I wanted was an explanation. I was cold to him the whole time he was there, and he noticed but tried to keep talking, hoping that I would forget the whole thing and just get back to 'normal'. Not this time, the game was over.

"Aren't you even gonna tell me why?" I said, stopping in mid sentence.

"Why what?"

"You know what I'm talking about. What? You don't want to be seen with me all of the sudden?" I said, turning to stare him right in those emerald green eyes of his.

"Jeremy, dude...don't take it so personal. It's not that I don't like you or anything..."

"So what is it?"

"I just...look, don't worry about it so much. God, you're getting so touchy all of the sudden."

"I'M getting touchy?!?! You act like you don't even know me when I talk to you at school! Then you run over here and act all happy and shit so you can get off and go home. Is that all you want?"

Steven seemed to be really hurt by what I said, but in my mind it wasn't like he didn't deserve it. "Jeremy, don't say that. I love you."

"So why don't you act like it and stop pushing me away." I didn't hear a reply for a few seconds and looked back into his eyes to see what was happening. He was starting to cry, and his eyes released two tears simultaneously, the drops rolling down his face. The site made me tear up too, but I was trying to stay strong until I got to the bottom of this. So I turned my back on him, knowing well that a tear from Steven's eyes would force me to break down and forgive him immediately.

"Jeremy...look, I don't...that is..." He didn't know how to say it, or how to explain it, but I was going to make certain that he was going to at least give it a shot this time. "I don't exactly know how to handle this, okay? I mean, I want to be with you all the time, but...at the same time, I don't want everybody to know about us. Please understand that it has nothing to do with you or us."

I turned around and even though I knew what he was saying, it didn't hurt any less. "I'm not asking you to make out with me in study hall...I just want to be able to talk to you once in a while."

"That's just it, Jeremy. I can't stop there, I don't know how. If you and me start talking all I can think about is holding you, touching you, kissing you...it's so strong that there's no way for me to hide it from them. When I look into your eyes I see everything that I've ever wanted or needed in my life, and I don't want to have to talk to you and hold back what I feel. I wish this wasn't so complicated. If you were a girl we wouldn't have this problem."

"If I was a girl, I wouldn't have your favorite body part either." I joked. I really wanted to be able to show Steven how much I loved him everywhere I went, but he was right, it was kind of hard to hide when we were together. I never knew when I was going to reach out and touch him, or call his name, or lean on his shoulder. I even had to consciously stop myself from dreaming about during most of the day. Yeah, it would be very difficult to hide indeed. But why should we have to hide it at all? I agreed with Steven one hundred percent...I wish this wasn't so complicated. My little joke seemed to make Steven smile a little and he wiped the stray tears from his eyes. It had barely been a week, and it felt like we shared so much. Then, he leaned forward and gave me a big hug.

"Thank you Jeremy. I owe you so much. You understand me better than anybody, and I love you with all my heart."

We held that embrace for a while before he got up to go home, but by the time he had hit the front door he had changed his mind. "So we're cool right? I'm sorry for being such a jerk today. This whole thing is still kind of new to me." I told him that I forgave him and he walked over to give me another hug, tighter than the last time. Hugging Steven was such an incredible experience, his slim hips and sleek body just felt so good in my arms. He would always wrap his arms around my neck and would basically stand on his tiptoes slightly in order to get a better grip. His thighs would rub up against mine and his soft breath would dash past my ear as his chin rested on my shoulder. Every hug he ever gave me made me shiver, and this one was one of the best.

Neither one of us wanted to let go, we just stood there, feeling our warm passion pass between our bodies. While still hugging him, I moved one hand up to sooth his silky brown hair, and the second I touched it, he began kissing lightly at my neck. I already knew where this was going. I took a step back towards my room and Steven, still wrapped in my loving arms, followed without resistance. We walked in and he shut the door behind us. He started to undress and even though he had a head start, I beat him to being totally naked. We took a moment to admire each other's tight teenaged bodies, God his golden tan made him look so hot. I was suddenly struck with a strange feeling of disbelief, as though this couldn't possibly be happening. I was so in love with Steven that it just didn't make sense for him to love me back. That stuff happens in movies and fairy tales...but not in real life. Does it? Steven giggled shyly at me examine his body from head to toe, and he moved forward to hug me again, this time with his hardness rubbing the inside of my thigh and poking me under my tight round sack. I nearly lost every breath I'd ever taken in my life.

I leaned back to gasp for air, and Steven kissed his way across my adam's apple to the other side of my neck. Then, with the slightest bit of pressure, Steven pushed me back on the bed and slowly crawled on top of me. He licked my lips and rested his firm ass right on the tip of my aching cock. I was so turned on that I was leaking like crazy, and he must have felt it because he started rubbing his ass back and forth over my wet tip. I shuddered, my lips trembling with the sensation, and he kissed me, his tongue gently gyrating and writhing in my mouth slowly as he drew the breath from my body. I said it before and I'll say it again, he's an awesome kisser!

As I leaked even more pre-cum out of pure horniness, he rubbed more and more around his taut little pucker. And the more he rubbed it in, the more turned on I was and I leaked even more of my precious fluids. Soon, he was wet and ready for me to enter him, and I couldn't have been more ready. Steven broke our kiss long enough to give me a look of heart bursting desire, before positioning my stiff member at the constricted opening of his hot tunnel. He leaned back slowly and I felt my cock pressed hard against his anus, but it seemed too small, too tight for me to break through. He leaned back more and tried to force it a little bit, but it made my dick bend and he was having trouble feeling comfortable with it. It was a bit uncomfortable for the both of us at first, but we kept at it, and we kept trying. I was surprised I was able to stay hard as much as I was concentrating on solving the problem. He was certainly lubricated enough. Then, he tried one last time, relaxing his muscles a little bit, and surprisingly, I penetrated my young lover with hardly any resistance at all. I had about two inches of myself inside of him and his ass clamped down on my cock hard as soon as I passed his tiny ring. God he was so tight that his anal walls had a strangle hold on my cock and the heat was unbelievable. Steven let it stay there for a while and went back to kissing me for a few seconds. Then he would slide down another inch or so before clamping tightly on me again and going back to his passionate lip lock. I still can't believe that I held out as long as I did. His ass slowly swallowing my engorged hard on inch by inch while his tongue displayed talents in my mouth that seemed to defy physics. My hands went back to grab a hold of his warm cheeks and I kneaded the soft meat around my cock, turning Steven on even more. Then, I felt a dribble of his pre-cum hit my stomach as his straining cock released a steady stream of the clear liquid. I touched my finger to the tip of it and brought it to my lips, making sure that Steven had some to taste as well. I let one of my hands take hold of his cock and I began to stroke it slowly whispering, "I don't ever want to be away from you. You make me so complete." And with that said, Steven sighed sensuously, and his ass slid the rest of the way down my shaft, his cute little bottom resting on my balls.

He asked if I was ready and I nodded breathlessly. Then, he pulled up slowly, his ass sucking and massaging my cock, overwhelming me with unimaginable ecstasy. The only thing that felt better than him raising up off of me, was the feeling he gave me when he sat back down, once again bathing me in his intense thermal heat. The soft, tight, wetness of his blazing hot insides were constantly moving, grinding, pulsing and spasming around my dick and forcing me over the edge quickly. I straightened out my legs, hoping that maybe it would help me to hold out for just a few seconds longer, but as he rode me faster and faster, I began to lose control. I was now forcing my hips up into him from off the bed, and he was moaning with delight. My balls were jumping up to slap gently against his smooth round globes and I was breathing so hard that I was starting to break a sweat. The bed squeaked beneath us as Steven bobbed up and down on me time and time again, every single up and down movement feeling like 2 or 3. I was whimpering loudly with every thrust and Steven leaned over to kiss me deeply, his ass still hugging tightly to my shaft. Feeling his lips against mine, his gentle boy breath entering my mouth, his soft brown hair falling into both of our eyes, was just too much for my body to take. I erupted inside of him with an orgasm that beat all others. I saw stars, fireworks, the whole world and everything in it was jammed into one initial spurt of cum that shot deep into Steven's insides. He wiggled his ass back and forth as he felt me squirting inside of him, and that made my tip so sensitive that I almost screamed. Then he shot off in my hands as I jacked him off furiously, his semen lubricating my hands with a thin layer of juice which made my motions even more unbearable on his tender meat. I was still shooting, almost 15 to 20 spurts, when he collapsed on top of me. We were both breathing hard, sweating, our hair sticking to our heads, it was great.

Steven started to roll off of me, but I didn't let him, I held him there on top of me, enjoying the feel of his ripe young body against mine. We both sighed out loud at the same time, and giggled madly after hearing it. There couldn't have been anybody more perfect for me than my Steven. We would eventually learn to be more open, more friendly towards each other. Hell, this was just beginning, and now that our love had been defined between us, there was no stopping it. It would soon grow beyond us, beyond hiding, beyond society and our families and our school. Soon, it would swallow us both and we'd be forever trapped in love's warm embrace. There's no place I'd rather be, not even in my wildest dreams.