Savage Moon 05 - Unleashed - 10. Chapter 10

It was a stressful task, trying to keep from worrying so it wouldn't show on my face how much I wanted to leave. Trying not to give away my thoughts with the others watching me so closely. So hungrily. I could barely look up from the floor of the back of that truck without my eyes meeting up with Shank and Razor's...or alerting John Boy to my movements. I swear....that boy could hear my eyeballs movin everytime I looked in his direction. And with Dex so tightly clamped to my side, there wasn't even a chance of jumping over the side in a panic and screaming for help. I had never felt so 'trapped' before. And Cyrus had NO intention of letting me go. Not ever. He had laid claim on my very life, and there would be no disputes worthy of me getting it back. Not that he would tolerate any disputes anyway. I remember feeling the ground passing underneath the truck so fast...carrying me further and further away from civilization. And something inside of me was still fighting me...still struggling to cancel out my free will and force me to give in. Force me to submit. Trying to ignore it was like trying to get your favorite song out of your head. No matter what you do, it's always there...nagging you, tugging at your attention. And...occassionally...just for a few seconds...I'd stop fighting it. Just to see what would happen.

It was a terrifying development! Giving up the struggle, even if only for a second, was like allowing yourself to sink into a pit of quicksand up to your eyes. It was as if my very spirit had become more and more polluted with Cyrus' contagious level of aggression and ego...just by resting the emotional muscle I was using to resist him for just a few seconds at the time. I could feel myself being submerged even deeper in the endless darkness...the black abyss embracing me with it's cold arms after waiting so very long for my acceptance of it. It felt like a drowning man's last moments...when he realizes that he can't ever reach the surface in time....and accepts his fate at the bottom of the lake...letting the waters rush into his lungs after so much struggle to stop them.

It was sooooo hard to fight it. It wouldn't even leave me alone long enough to be depressed over the loss of my freedom. The calling was relentless, forever pushing me to submit. And when I stopped to take a breath, feeling the energy of the group surging through me like greased lightning...it felt so damn good to release it all at once. I nearly swooned from the infatuated sensation I had with my sudden 'dip' into my darker nature. It was so seductive. So alluring. Just a taste of it was like a thousand sugar rushes to the system at once. An addictive narcotic of the soul, waiting to be pushed.....waiting to be 'tested'. Just to see how far you could go with it. After a while...it was pulling myself back into reality that became the hard part. My desires simply did not want to wake up from the dream. They preferred to remain stuck in their stubborn fantasy...peacefully....wickedly....even if it meant leaving reality behind forever.

It became a game...slipping in and out of this new reality. Allowing it take me over for just five seconds or so...enjoying the feel of it...and then rushing back to my sanity before it soaked in too deeply. Then...slipping back in...the next time trying for ten seconds instead. It was similar to teasing a hungry animal with a stick...poking at it ever so gently just to see what kind of reaction you could get from it. The 'dangerous' feeling a young child gets when he first sees the rapidly spinning blades of a house fan, and wonder what it would be like to touch them. Even though bodily harm and certain horror is present...the curiosity is too great to resist the awareness of the temptation. And the beauty of the realization that the only thing keeping you from going through with it...is the fact that you choose not to.

I felt Dex crane his neck upwards and kiss me lovingly on the neck, giving me a few sweet licks there as I held him there. I had never been so adored before. I had never been the object of such spontaneous affection....and it only made me want to fall deeper into the darkness. My sexual urges spoke volumes to me, and I allowed my hand to slide down into the back of Dexter's pants...where I squeezed and groped that soft mounds inside. Dex sucked on my neck harder and whimpered quietly as I felt a smile spread on my face, and I felt my finger slide down...further...almost touching the sweet wrinkled pucker at the very core of him. It radited eat from it's tiny opening, and my finger was blessed with a heated moisture that made me shiver slightly with the temptation. But Dex squirmed away from the contact, as I evidently traveled towards 'forbidden' territory. He whispered, "Not without father's order..." He reached back to pull my hand out of his pants as he rested his head on my shoulder and stopped kissing me at all. Why would I need Cyrus' permission to give Dex a little fingering? I must admit that I instantly missed the sexual stimulation...but didn't fight him on it. Besides, the last thing I wanted was for Cyrus and the others to be mean to Dexter because of something I did to him. So I just let him rest, and I was content holding him next to me for the time being. For now at least.

I can't explain it...but I wanted him. All of him. And it was getting harder and harder to see why I couldn't just...'take' him for my own. To even say that for myself sounds crazy! But it was the truth! Maybe, instead of playing these weird mind games with Sebastian...I should be spending hot times with Dexter instead. Or even John Boy, as his fascination with me was much more than I could ever hope for with Sebastian's careless treatment of my heart. Despite his beauty, which was STILL far above and beyond anything that I had ever seen before...I mean, he was 'prettier' than most WOMEN...his false affections weren't enough to really satisfy me for very long. It wasn't enough for me to pretend, I needed more. Much more. Maybe Dexter and I will get some time alone tonight instead. I would like that. And I would make sure that Dex liked that too.

At that moment, I heard the twins giggle wickedly to themselves, perhaps noticing my brief surrender to the lustful feelings inside. I looked up at their smiling faces, and for some odd reason, had the sickening urge to suddenly get up and push them off the back of the moving truck. It was a quick and violent impulse that left my mind almost as soon as it entered it...but it was thee, and I actually was able to draw some 'joy' out of imagining them being hurt. This was not like me at all. But the more the emotional fog crawled into my mental state, the more I gave into it. I stared up at Shank, who smiled at me before turning to look at his brother. But when I looked over at Razor, my eyes caught just a glimpse of him flaring up a particularly bright match before tossing the lit flame right at Dexter's face. But my hand shot forward all on it's own and caught the match in my hand...feeling a few seconds of the heat burning my palm as I snuffed out the fire before it ever touched Dexter at all. I didn't even flinch. In fact, I didn't even fully catch 'sight' of the match before catching it in my hand. And yet, it all came so easy. Almost TOO easy!

Both twins laughed and nodded at me with approval, John Boy showing his grin as well. And when Dex giggled and kissed me hard on the cheek for 'saving' him, I couldn't help but laugh along with him. Kriegar took a mouthfull of liquor, and then spit it out at me! "Hey!!! Hehehe! Quit wasting it!" I said, and he lightly kicked my leg in response.

"You wanna know something, kid?" He said. "I was almost beginning to think that I'd NEVER fully like anything about you. But NOW....?" He leaned forward to pat me on the shoulder. "Now...I'm starting to think you might end up being my favorite out of the REST of these assholes!" The comment got the others to laugh...but I honestly think he was being somewhat serious. And the pride that came with Kriegar's acceptance, even while intoxcated, was flattering beyond belief. I grinned from ear to ear.

"No shit?" I said, with a slight blush.

"No shit." He replied. "But you're gonna have to 'man up' and get your drinking tolerance up to hang with me junior. Your drink game is looking kinda 'sissy-ish' right now!"

"Psh! Give me that bottle, bitch!" I scoffed, and took it from his hand, gulping down a few swallows of the stinging liquid. DAMN did it burn! But I was able to shake it off.

"I WANT SOME!!!" Dexter shouted in my ear, and grabbed the bottle, gulping down a hefty swig himself before handing the bottle back to Kriegar. Then, I felt his lips pressed against my neck again....and he opened his mouth to let the last full mouth of liquor dribble down into the collar of my shirt!

"Ahhh....what are you DOING???" I giggled, my shirt getting wet by Dexter's 'deposit'. But once the wetness soaked into my shirt, I just hugged the crazy son of bitch closer and kissed him on the forehead. "You're WEIRD, you know that?"

"Uh huh!" He smiled, and rested his head on my shoulder again.

I know I should run. I know I should scream. So why was I waiting? Was I looing forward to having a better story to tell once I retuned home? Or....was I actually planning to stay? I mean....after this past week.....

....What would my life be without Cyrus and the others by my side?

The truck took us back to the old place in the woods, our 'clubhouse'. And everyone jumped out of the truck on cue...me included. It came natural. It was exactly as John Boy told me....when I stopped strugglng, all decisons were easy. Choose to follow, and the light is always within reach. Always. Kriegar and the twins took he crates of liquor up into their arms to bring our magical 'stash' into the house. Dex dettached himself from my hip when we hit the ground, and ran to the house top speed, practically knocking the door down with his shoulder as he ran inside and fell down, face first, in through the front door. Not that any fall could possibly keep Dex from popping right back up to his feet and running again like a toddler on a caffeine binge! And we all filed in through the front door. It was all fine and dandy until I walked in behind Cyrus and Scout dug his shoulder into me in an attempt to push me back out of the way.

This time....the violent urge was instantaneous, and before I knew what I was doing, I grabbed Scout by the top of his blond head and brutally yanked him back! I then put my hand on his face and physically pushed him out of my way, nearly slamming his head into the side of the door frame! I felt the disruption of the energies around me instantly. ALL eyes suddenly snapped over in my direction, as the others aggression flooded the air with tension with their split second reaction! I stared at Scout briefly, daring him to protest my position so that I could defend it...with violence if necessary. But, while I half expected the little brat to charge me and bite me on the ankle in a childish tantrum...he only stared back at me in silence...and he let it slide. It was something that I didn't see coming at all. Kristin draped her arms over his shoulders as Cyrus smiled and took a hold of my hand to lead me inside. I wasn't going to let that little spoiled demon come between me and 'father' ever again. That game has gotten tiresome. And I'm not going to stand for it anymore.

Everyone came in, and started grabbing plastic cups off of the living room coffee table. Kriegar dragged a cooler of ice into the middle of the room, and within seconds, the music was up at full volume, and everyone was drinking and partying again as though it was their last day on Earth and wanted to go out with a bang. Cyrus took his usual seat in the center of the living room, and everyone else just kinda scattered about, soaking up as much alcohol as they could. "HERE!" Kriegar shouted over the music as he handed me a clean glass from the kitchen, full of some kind of dark colored concoction. "You've got 20 seconds! GO!" He said.

"I've got wha...?" But he pushed my hand up to my lips, and started pouring the drink into my mouth. I had to swallow just to keep it from choking me to death or spilling out on both sides to drench me in liquor. The fizz of the soda mixed into the drink burned my throat, and I could feel the carbonation trying to escape through my nostrils as my eyes teared up. But Kriegar kept tipping the glass back, and my only option was to spit and sputter it out, or swallow faster. So I gulped it down, excited to see that the glass was almost empty. I had to hold my breath, my lungs pressured to sacrifice their need for oxygen as the liquid rushed past my closed windpipe. And just when I thought I was going to have to spit the rest out...the last few swallows of alcohol and soda bubbled its way down into my gullet, and Kriegar took the glass from my lips. "UGH!!! JESUS!!!" I said, coughing as I felt a sudden blast of dizzyness explode behind my eyes, almost causing me to fall over.

"YEAH! Take it, bitch! Hehehe!" A loud cheer erupted all around the room, and my blurred vision saw them clapping for me. Kriegar roughly grabbed me by the back of my neck and pulled me towards his face, kissing me lustfully on the lips, his tongue soaked in liquor. I have to admit...his kiss was so deep, so invasive, that you would think that I'd find it disgusting. But instead, it was EXTREMELY hot! It was raw, and unrestricted, and I got hard instantly as our tongues wrestled frantically for domination of one another. But when he broke the kiss, I felt my rubbery legs give way, and I had to lean on him for support. "Hahaha! You alright there, rookie?" He asked.

"What the hell WAS that???" I said, still wondering where my balance went.

"Don't worry about it. It was good for you!" Kriegar smiled, and gave me another kiss and a grope of my crotch before he let me go and decided to return his attention to his bottle. Mmmmm....maybe I should spend some more time alone with Kriegar too. Something tells me that it would be one amazingly wild fuck if I did!

The music seemed to get even louder, as the sensitivity of my ears perked up. That alcohol was coursing through my system rapidly, my eyes nearly rolling back in my head, and something about that caused my fever to return. If only for a few moments. It's like it was trying to balance me out again...'heal' me...and keep my equilibrium steady. Why was I involved in this? I looked around the room and saw Kristin dancing around with a cup in her hand, Sebastian sitting by himself in the window sill reading, the twins were kissing each other madly on the couch...where was I? What was I doing? I looked down to notice a freshly filled glass of liquor in my hand. I don't even remember pouring it. Or did somebody pour it for me? How long had I been leaning against this wall? I don't remember walking over to the wall. This was....so unimaginably different from everything that I knew about myself. But my instincts kept talking to me at a hundred miles an hour. Telling me to drink. Telling me to scream, and to kiss, and to push, and to shove, and to 'forget'. It called to me from the inside, and trying to ignore it was like trying to fight off an exhausted state of sleep. Where it scrambles your thoughts to the point where you don't even know you're asleep until you become aware of the few minutes on the clock that have passed you by without your knowledge. I could feel my eyes closing, my will submitting to the deep sleep that was drawing the life right out of me. Replacing it with a new life entirely. A life not mine.

I finally let my knees relax, and I slid down to the floor. Feeling the glass being pressed to my lips once again. But this time, I didn't have any help from Kriegar. I was doing it all on my own. I drank heavily, my knees pulled up to my chest as I rested my elbows on them, and I looked around the room at the festivities going on around me. It was so surreal. So abnormal. Can this be it? Is this all I can expect from them? Some random escape from the world through super loud music and screaming over the music? A few sexual interludes and a couple of fights on beaches and in dimestore parking lots? I don't know....maybe my mind was just going in circles. It must be the drinking that's doing this to me. That's all. Yeah...just the drinking.

"HEY!!! Watch this!" Dexter said as he jumped down from a table to land right in front of me. Then, for some odd reason, he did a sommersault, looked back at me, and waited for my approval. "Did you see it? I can do it again!"

"Hehehe! No, that's ok, Dex! It's very cool. Very sexy." I laughed.

"You HEAR that? He said it was SEXY! You guys never tell me I'm sexy! Only Goo Goo! *FUCK* YOU GUYS!" He shouted.

"DEX?!?!" Kristin said with a frown.

She threw a couch pillow at him and he apologized, "Sorry...I know, I know...be good..." John Boy calmed him down by putting a cold beer in his hands before he began to lose his 'grace' and start ranting and raving about the rest of them. "YEAH!!! SWEET!!" He grinned, and walked off to enjoy himself a bit more.

I sat there...sipping my drink...and absorbing the reality of everything around me. Suddenly...that curious sensation of madness wasn't as 'refreshing' as I wanted it to be. And I felt my emotional pendulum slightly swinging back in the direction of me finding a hasty exit from this pit of serpents at my earliest convenience. I should stop drinking. I should...I should keep my wits sharp. Just in case I get a chance to leave tonight. Maybe...maybe if I could get he eys to the truck, I could somehow find a way to get back to the camp on my own. I don't know how to drive, but how hard could it be, right? Gas, brake, steering wheel...I'm sure I could figure it out pretty fast. I've just got to find a way to get those keys away from fath....I mean....from Cyrus. Ugh! Concentrate, Wesley! Get your gameface on, for crying outloud! This is SERIOUS!

I just need some distance. That's it....some distance.

I looked up from the floor for a moment, and saw Cyrus staring directly at me. He wasn't smiling. He didn't seem angry, but he watched me wih an almost predatory gaze. Scout was dutifully sitting on the arm of his chair at his right side, twirling his fingers in Cyrus' blond hair. Normally, any eye contact with Cyrus' was an excercise in raw courage, but this time when I didn't turn away from his stare...he seemed 'excited' by it. Intrigued. Everyone else was dancing around and making their usual brand of untamed noise, but Cyrus and I remained silent. It felt good. It felt GREAT! And I couldn't understand why. Something about holding eye contact with him was an adventure for me.

After a minute or so, however, Cyrus reached up to rub Scout on the top of his golden mop, and with the slightest of pressure, he pushed him slowly to his knees on the floor beside him. Scout never asked any questions, nor did he offer any resistance. He simply crawled around to the front of the chair and knelt down between Cyrus spread legs. It only took a moment for him to get the message, and Scout unzipped his leader's pants, reaching his boyish fingers inside to grip the column of flesh inside. He fished the massive organ out of the fly, and it stood strong and proud in fontof him. The size of it still looked almost unnatural on Cyrus' body, the tip of it reaching back far enough to touch the top of his navel easily. For someone who looked like a pretty little teeny bopper with an attitude...Cyrus was deinitely packing a lot of sweet meat there.

He never took his eyes off of mine, but when he was 'exposed'....I was compelled to look. My stare gradually dropped down into his lap, watching the constant pulse of the blushed warm rod as a single sticky drop of liquid rolled down from the top of the enlarged helmet and slid down over Scout's dwarfed young fingers. Then, Cyrus brushed the back of Scout's neck, and Scout opened as wide as his mouth would allow to push his lips over the top. Scout got an impressive amount inside as his baby lips slid further to capture almost half of his length in a warm, wet, vacuum, before sliding back up to the top, and sinking down again. Scout closed his eyes, moaning greedily as he looked like he was giving the most intense blowjob of his life. He sucked and drooled and used his hand to cradle and fondle his balls as the thick erection filled him to the tonsils. And yet....Cyrus' eyes, his excitement, his fascination, remained focusd on me the whole time. And when I shifted my position to make room for the growing tightness in my pants...Cyrus showd me an evil grin. Like....he was laughing at me or something. As though having him and Scout do this right in front of me was meant to be some kind of humiliation for me. A demonstration that my body would give in to the temptaton of it. That I wouldn't be able to fight the attraction, the lust of it. And he was right. He's always right.

But that doesn't mean that I have to 'like' it.

I finished the drink in my glass, my mind swimming in a haze, and I used the wall behind me to get back up on my feet. I gave Cyrus one more look as his cocky smile graced me once again, his hips pushing furthe up into his young treasure's face as he hungrily begged for more...and I gave him a gentle sneer as I walked out of the room to go into the kitchen.

The music vibrated through the whole house, easily rattling windows from the other room. I poured out the liquor-soaked ice into the sink, and ran the water from the faucet until it got cool enough to drink. I filled my glass half way, and sipped the cool liquid...my tongue politely thanking me for a drink that didn't 'burn' on the way down. I set the glass down, and used my hands to splash a little water on my face. It seemed to help combat the intoxication a bit, and give me a bit of my clarity back. But I was only alone for a minute or two, before I felt a presence behind me, standing in the doorway.

When I turned, my eyes were flooded with Sebastian's soft beauty and grace, his chocolate brown eyes fixed on me with an infatuated twinkle. No matter how many times you see him face to face, the novelty of his sensual features never wore off. His allure never failed to catch you by surprise, and I had to think hard to keep from swooning. And he KNEW how gorgeous he was too...and how to use it as a weapon. That made him one of the most dangerus people in existence as far as I was concerned.

"Once again...you don't look like you're having any fun, babe." He said softly. God, just the tone of his voice was seductive. And that's when he wasn't even trying. But despite the attraction, I knew that he was doing it on purpose. I take it he's supposed to poke a finger into my wounds and exploit my big weakness for sex again. Just like before. That knowledge helped me to stay strong. And I got some more water out of the sink to keep my head together.

"What do you want?" I asked with a roll of my eyes. As though me ignoring him was supposed to have an effect when he had the whole world wrapped around his finger.

"Hehehe, your aggression is so uneccessary right now." He smiled, and waltzed his way into the kitchen. I felt his hands on my shoulders, and he gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Why don't you come back in and join us for a while? Let me see you smile for a while."

"You didn't seem to care if I was smiling all day. Now you're worried about me?"

"Should I be? Is it my job to be?" Ouch...why is it that the pretty people's comments always seem to hurt the most?

"Great. I'm a lot happier now, thanks." I told him, and drank some more out of my glass.

"What the heck are you doing drinking water? Dude, we've got a brand new supply of good shit right there in the other room."

"I'm trying to clear my head."

"That's what the liquor is for." Sebastian smiled, wrapping his arms around me. I instantly pushed him away from me, and walked to another part of the counter, keeping my back to him. I couldn't see his face, but I could literally feel his mood change. In fact, I could almost smell it in the air...this sudden addition of 'spice' into a previously tension-less situation.

Feeling bold, I told him, "You know, I'm not gonna just up and run away or anything, if that's what you're worried about. If our 'fearless leader' sent you in here to keep an eye on me, it isn't necessary." I took another sip of water. "So you can go on back in the other room and tell Cyrus to relax. I'm fine."

Sebastian walked over to me, and hoisted himself up to sit on the counter top so that he could look me in the eye. "Ok....first of all...we don't TELL Cyrus anything. EVER!" He said, almost insulted by the idea of it. "You'd know that if you'd just fall into position like you were supposed to instead of maintaining this stupid illusion of choice." He leaned further to the side to stare at my face. And he told me, with a somewhat menacing expression, "And second....running wouldn't do you any fucking good. Believe me. You'd be stupid to try. I'm sure you realize that by now."

"Yeah...whatever." I said, still avoiding the urge to look at him and absorb his gorgeous presence any more than I had to. My defiance would crumble instantly if I allowed my heart to fall for him again. And honestly...how could I stop it?

Sebastian found it extremely amusing that I would even attempt to dodge his spellbinding charms by not looking him in the eyes. He smiled to himself, and sighed. "You know....you think you're fighting US by being this way, Wesley. But you're not. The only person you're fighting is yourself. Why? Haven't you seen how completely useless it is to restrain yourself with such devotion to a system that, frankly, doesn't give a shit about you or what you want? We're offering you a chance to be better, here. Why can't you just embrace it?" He asked me. "I know that it feels like your losing your grip on everything you have, I understand that. But what you're failing to realize is that what you 'had' wasn't really yours to begin with. It's a giant sack of bricks that other peole put on your shoulders just so you could be as miserable as they are. They're selfish, Wesley...and they don't want you to be complete while they're not. Aren't you tired of be restrained?"

"I know what you're trying to do..." I said.

"Do you? Because right now, I think you're still looking for some kind of hidden trick, some mysterious man behind the curtain that's gonna suddenly jump out and tell you that this is all a lie. But in reality, you know there isn't another truth other than the one we've offered you. You know that this happy little altar boy routine that you've been playing for most of your life isn't really you. It never has been. And your arms are getting sooooooo tired....because you've been hanging on to the edge of that cliff for a long long time. But you don't have to hang on anymore." Sebastian put two fingers under my chin to turn my head to face him, his brown eyes practically hypnotizing me in an instant. "You can let go, Wesley. Let go...and freefall with the rest of us. Cyrus is there...and he will catch you. If you'll let him."

"I can't just..." I started, wishing that what he said wasn't true. Wishing that his raw sexuality wasn't helping the constant 'call' inside of me grow stronger. "...I can't just 'give up' my life and sit here and drink and party and have sex all day long."

"Why not?" He smiled.

"It's not SANE, Sebastian, that's why not!"

"What's sane about living a life that you hate? About being punished with meaningless chores for a crime you didn't committ? About fearing your own desires because exposure of your true nature would mean becoming an outcast to everyone you've fought so hard to hide it from?" It was never an easy thing to tune them out. It was as if they could speak to a part of me that I didn't know well enough to defend. Something deep, a secret even to me. And when he saw me struggling with the idea, he gently ran his delicated fingers through my blond hair, caressing me tenderly behind my left ear with his fingertips. "You have no idea how much potential you hold within you at this very moment. You haven't the slightest clue the gift we've given you here. But once you give yourself over to it...you are never going to get enough. The power is soooo addictive. So unbelievably liberating." He leaned forward, kissing me slowly on the cheek with his eyes closed, his lips lingering for a second or two as his warm breath breezed across my skin. And electric vibration surged to every part of me, and I heard myself whimper slightly as I melted into his every word. Then, Sebastian whispered in my ear. "Put your faith in him, Wesley. Put your soul completely in our hands...and we will bring you to a level of life that you would have never dreamed possible."

He moved back for a moment, and then after connecting his stare to mine, he began to kiss me deeply on the lips. Our tongues intertwined, and his soft chestnut colored hair curtained both of my cheeks. He smelled so sweet. He tasted so ripe. And this uncontrollable lust began to rise up in me faster than I could stop it, causing me to kiss him hungrily. I began to breathe harder and harder, my hands groping him all over his sleek perfectly shaped body. My adrenaline began to soar, and I had to hold the back of Sebastian's head as I smashed my lips roughly against his. My muscles tensed, and visions of me literally tearing the clothes off of him in shreds, leaving scratch marks on his chest and shoulders. I was practically climbing up onto the counter with him as I felt my whole body become possessed with this insatiable hum...buzzing with energy that crawled up my spine and crawled over my shoulders as it headed up to my brain. My mind began to lose itself in the moment, my hardness tingling, ready to explode. I wanted to TAKE him! I NEEDED it! I....I....

I broke the kiss, looking at Sebastian as he was sprawled back on the kitchen counter, an obvious bulge waiting for my attention. I was shaking. Trembling until I couldn't even hold my hand still. Whatever it was that I was giving myself over to...it was more savage than I was prepared to deal with. A lawless set of random impulses that had no respect for consequences whatsoever. I couldn't even get my heart to stop beating so hard. It was almost like being lured into a full blown cardiac arrest, and it was getting much more difficult to hold it in! I backed away from the couner, and Sebastian sat back up, shaking his head in disappointment.

"Fine. Have it your way." He said, fixing his hair, and straightening his erection in his jeans. I stared down at my hands...watching them quake and spasm with desire. My eyes burned, my teeth gnashed together, my every muscle tense to the point of being sore. But that full body 'buzz' was still there....and I couldn't get it to calm down. No matter how hard I tried.

Sebastian walked past me to go back into the livingroom with the others, but he stopped behind my back and grabbed a hold of my shoulders. This time....the grip wasn't gentle. It wasn't suggestive, seductive, or flirtatious. This was a frustrated grasp that displayed his growing anger with my refusal. And he said, "Do what you want, 'altar boy'...but sooner or later, you're gonna find out what it's like to be with us."

"Or else...?" I asked.

"Or else....you're gonna find out what it's like to be against us. And I don't think that's the kind of 'enlightenment' you've been looking for. Trust me on this." He patted me hard on the back a few times and then left me in the room alone.

The physical tremors faded after a few moments of silence, but it was what I saw when I looked up again that really began to frighten me. Maybe it was my mind playing tricks on me...or just a freak effect of the alcohol that I had ingested so quickly, who knows? But when I raised my head, and looked out of the back kitchen windows...I saw more than just darkness outside from the recently setting sun. I saw a flash of two bright orbs in the reflection of the glass. A light greenish yellow glow....that moved when I moved. t was almost as if....they were my eyes doing that.

I moved closer to the window to see, but the glow was gone by the time I reached the glass. Did I really see it? Was that really me?