The Pastel Cowboy - 14. Fuck Me, Part 2

He was falling. There was no dream. No image of the world dropping away, only a sense of falling, falling, falling. It seemed to go on forever. Warm lips pressed against his. He opened his mouth and accepted the probing tongue. There was a scream off in the distance; so far away he couldn’t be certain it was human or something else. He tried not thinking about it.

Zach opened his eyes to a darkened room. He felt a presence next to him and turned to see Bruce smiling.

“Twice in the same day,” Bruce said, “must be some kind of record.”

Zach smiled and shut his eyes. He had no reference to time other than Bruce was off work. He was hungry, very hungry. He couldn’t remember if he’d finished breakfast. He must have, they took him to see Doctor Cunningham. Was this how you went crazy? Or, was he already saddled and off on a journey to oblivion with a bed sheet suffocatingly tight around his neck? He didn’t want this, hadn’t asked for it, and couldn’t figure out how to get rid of it. Maybe he should go into the hospital and be drugged senseless for an eternity and come out a new man ready to wander the streets of Seattle in filthy clothes searching for, for who? Who would he search for?

Zach opened his eyes and turned to Bruce, but no one was there. It had happened, again; or, was it only a dream.

He sat up and looked at the clock beside the bed. Eight-ten. Morning? Night? He didn’t know. His drapes were drawn, but it was summer so there would be a little light coming in around the edges. Was this a dream, too?

Falling. He was falling, again.

Zach felt warm lips lightly touch his. He opened his eyes and saw Bruce’s face close to his.

“Uh, huh! No peeking,” Bruce said. “You’re not supposed to open your eyes when you kiss. It’s a rule.”

“Are you a dream, too?” Zach asked.

“No, I’m the real thing. You weren’t quite awake so I went back to the living room to watch porn with Paul.”

“You didn’t either.”

“At least I went to the living room. David is gone somewhere and Paul is willing to take us to dinner, no I guess it’s going to be a late night snack the way you’re getting up.”

“What time is it?” Zach asked. Except for the endless sense his was falling, he wanted to go back to sleep. He stared out past Bruce and felt his mind empty, as if it stopped accepting input.

“Past nine o’clock, so get up and put some clothes on,” Bruce said. “You’re practically naked.”

“If you took off your clothes, you’d be naked.”

“Yes, but that won’t get us any food.”

“I have something you can eat,” Zach said as he pulled out his half hard cock. He looked at it, but couldn’t will it into an erection.

“There’s not enough nourishment in that thing to feed me,” Bruce said as he got off the bed. “Come on, put some clothes on. We haven’t got all night.”

“What’s your hurry?”

“I want to get some food in me so we can come back here and, well, you know.”

“I know what?”

“You know, um, get naked and, uh, you know.”

“Fuck me?”

“I don’t know about that, but you know there’s something I’m supposed to do and, well, I don’t want to fall asleep doing it.”

“Oh, you’re not going to fall asleep. I can assure you of that.”

“Are you going to put some clothes on?”

“What should I wear?” Zach asked. The question was so innocent. It slipped right of his tongue without a thought to back it up.

“I don’t know. Put something, anything, on so we can go get some food. I’m practically starving.”

Zach felt it up on his arm crawling down toward his left hand. He couldn’t decide what to wear. God, he had to make a decision, a simple decision and not doing so was going to set off another episode. The last thing he wanted at the moment was that hopeless, empty feeling when his mind became so confused, so unable to do anything other than shut down. He had to stop it.

“Bruce, um, could you do me favor and select some pants and a shirt for me,” Zach said in slow, measured monotone, even though speaking seemed to worsen his situation. “I seem to have a problem making decisions right now.”

Bruce looked at Zach and growing sense of awareness washed over his face.

“Oh, sure, no problem, how about what you wore earlier?” Bruce said as he walked over to the valet and picked up a pair of blue jeans and a Kenny Chesney t-shirt. “I don’t think we’ll get into anything fancy this late.”

“No, I want a shirt, just in case Paul knows of a good fish place,” Zach said as he watched his left hand as if daring it to twitch. “Do you like seafood?”

“Yes, I like seafood. Do you like sushi?”

“What’s that?” Was a simple question okay? He didn’t know.

“Oh, that’s right, you’re from Nowhere, Oklahoma,” Bruce said as he walked over to the closet and began rifling through Zach’s clothes. “I keep forgetting you’re a stupid farmer who hasn’t been across the street for years.”

“Hey, are you trying to pick a fight because I’m incapacitated?”

“If you can say words with that many syllables, you ain’t incapacitated.”

“Don’t say ain’t. If you’re gonna talk like a farmer, the proper word is airn’t.”

“Airn’t?”

“Yeah.”

“Is this shirt okay?”

“Uh, well, I, well,” Zach stammered as he stared at his left hand. He thought he saw a quiver and shut his eyes. “One, two, three, four …”

“Oh, sorry, let’s see what my lover boy should wear,” Bruce said. “I suppose since I’m going to have to make all your decisions from now on, I can start changing your wardrobe to something a little queerer. You’ve got too many straight clothes. All these t-shirts, they’re all country western. We’ll have to get rid of those first. And, um, where is it, where does my bottom boy put it? Where is it?”

“You’re not Cagney and this isn’t a remake of Mister Roberts,” Zach said when he opened his eyes. He couldn’t help smiling at Bruce who was rummaging through the dresser. “What are you looking for?”

“Eye shadow, if you want me to fuck you, you’re going to have to where at least eye shadow,” Bruce said.

“Oh, no, you’re not turning me into one of you.”

“Already have, I put the pod in the closet. Here, put this shirt on and, I think, you’ll look good in black jeans.”

“No! Not black. Conan wears black,” Zach said. He practically slammed his eyes shut and started counting again. He felt Bruce embrace him and after a brief moment when every muscle went taut, he succumbed to the offered comfort.

“Sorry, I’ll get rid of the black jeans. You only have a couple pair anyway. Just stand still and I’ll dress you. Come on, relax. I wonder if we should change our underwear, too? Ooh, what’s this? Don’t open your eyes. Whatever you do don’t open your eyes.”

Zach felt fingers softly exploring his cock and balls. He thought of Jeremy and heard Bruce gasp slightly. He was almost fully erect and, in his mind, saw Jeremy put his soft, moist lips over the blood engorged head. The tongue went around and down then back around and up.

He and Jeremy were on a beach somewhere. Waves were thundering on the shore behind him. They kissed and began to undress each other. He looked at his lover’s young body as it slowly knelt before him. He reached out and felt the soft hair as Jeremy’s mouth drew him inside. A hand was on his balls and he felt a finger begin to trace along that faint seam of skin leading back to where Jeremy’s tongue would soon follow.

The other hand was vigorously stroking him as the warm, wet mouth drew him further back toward the opening of, of, of, of, Bruce’s throat. He was in his bedroom and Bruce was sucking his cock. He tried to think of Jeremy to get back that image of the beach, but a fingertip was entering him and his balls were tightening. His entire groin was on fire.

This definitely wasn’t Jeremy and he definitely wasn’t going to hold back. He felt the twist of the rubber band holding Bruce’s ponytail and pulled up the nearly two feet of hair hanging from it. He bunched it up and ran his fingers through the hairs and saw Amy sucking his cock. His eyes flashed open as his orgasm exploded out of his balls. Then, as Bruce tried to swallow the flood, Zach shut his eyes and stared at Amy’s breasts.

He’d only seen them twice and each time marveled at the excitement they created in his dick. They kissed while his fingers carefully explored each one and she giggled slightly when he brushed the nipples with his work roughened hands. Meanwhile, one of her hands was stroking him and when he felt the orgasm begin to overtake his senses he softly pinched one of the nipples. Come erupted out of his cock and splattered on her bare tummy. Her tongue was down his throat and he felt her shudder as she, too, came at that moment.

Zach opened his eyes and he was fully clothed, including socks and shoes. Bruce was standing very close watching him. Could it be possible he wasn’t’ gay? But he enjoyed having a dick up his ass and come spewing down his throat. You couldn’t get more gay than that. Could you do that and not be gay? He felt Bruce’s lips on his and he accepted the kiss.

Or, had that memory just been another manifestation of the insanity that was trying very hard to overwhelm him? He loved her. That much he knew. And, then, he came back from the river trip and was branded as a homosexual. She wouldn’t even speak to him, even once when he got her alone late one afternoon in the high school parking lot. He tried to state his case, plead his innocence, but she shut her eyes and turned away from him. He saw a tear dribble out of her eye and he never tried to talk to her again.

“Are you okay enough to go to dinner?” Bruce asked.

“Yeah, I’m okay now, thanks,” Zach said. He ran a palm over Bruce’s ass and imagined sinking his face between those luscious mounds of flesh. “How was it?”

“Not as bad as I thought. I might to it again, later.”

“After you fuck me?”

“Before, to get you in the mood.”

“Sounds sexy.”

“You two certainly took your own sweet time,” Paul said as Zach and Bruce walked into the living room. “At the rate you’re going, it’ll time for breakfast by the time we get out of here. How’re you doin’, kiddo?”

“Okay,” Zach said flatly.

“I think he should stay home,” Bruce said, “but I’m hungry so I guess we’d better take him. He’s old enough to leave in the car.”

“Hey, are you trying to pick a fight?” Zach asked.

“No, just trying to get you to smile.”

“What’re we eating?” Paul asked.

“Seafood,” Zach said.

“Oh, right, at nearly ten o’clock Saturday night we’re going out for seafood,” Paul said.

Zach gave him the look of a spoiled child who had to have his lolly no matter what time it was. When that didn’t seem to get a response, he changed it to a pout. Paul simply stared back at him.

“Come on, Paul, let’s go eat some fish,” Zach said. “Please?”

“Okay, if you’re going to be nice about it,” Paul said.

“He is rather nice, but fucks like a rabbit,” Zach said.

Paul glared at him.

“It felt more like a cocker spaniel to me,” Bruce said.

“What were you doing while I was asleep?” Zach asked.

“Fucking,” Paul said. He shouldered Bruce who went red from embarrassment.

“Okay, I’ll smile,” Zach said, but it didn’t last for more than a few seconds.

“He’s not doing too well,” Bruce said as they entered the elevator car. “He zones out like he’s doing right now.”

“His shrink said he should be admitted to a hospital,” Paul said. He put and arm across Zach’s shoulders. Zach accepted the gesture and leaned into the older man’s body.

“He just can’t make a decision,” Bruce said. “I had to dress him.”

“And suck my cock,” Zach said.

“God, Zach, you don’t have any decency,” Bruce said.

“Just trying to make you smile,” Zach said.

The words seemed to fade away after that and they stood in silence until the elevator arrived at the fourth subbasement where David and Paul parked their cars. When they got to Paul’s beamer, Zach and Bruce climbed into the back seat.

“I take it I’m the chauffeur,” Paul said.

“Yes, Paul, we’d like seafood,” Zach said. “And, not fast food, either. I want a hunk of fish that looks like it came from a fish.”

“Right, know the perfect place, and they’re open late, too.”

Zach sat beside Bruce and laid his head over onto his friend’s shoulder. He knew he should’ve stayed home, maybe even taken one of the pills. He didn’t know what was going on, but was getting tired of being tired and having to watch out for the odd twitch that might be an indication another episode was building up in some dark corner of his mind.

He felt Bruce’s hand on his thigh, but didn’t feel like doing anything about it or trying to reciprocate. He just wanted all of this to be over so he could get back to his normal life, whatever that was; and, somewhat unexpectedly, he realized he wanted the boy beside him to be Jeremy. Bruce was nice and probably would be great later that night when Zach was finally able to get him to put his dick where it was supposed to go, but he wanted Jeremy. Not necessarily Jeremy fucking him, just Jeremy’s warm body next to his.

Those last few days at the beach had been so wonderful. They’d slept in the nude, but Jeremy had been good to his word. No sex meant no sex. They’d wake up with morning wood, but neither of them did any serious touching that might lead to an orgasm. In the shower, though, when Jeremy helped Zach wash he was unable to stop his body from responding to the firm pressure of hand and fingers. They’d kiss after Zach came. Then Jeremy would stare at him with that nice cock of his standing erect. Using shower gel as lubrication, Zach slowly washed the length of that cock until Jeremy couldn’t stand it and pressed his wet body against Zach’s.

There were no apologies necessary. They were simply helping each other with a daily orgasm and being together had little to do with Jeremy’s promise to not have sex because sex meant putting it in someplace. They were simply jerking each other off; well, that is Jeremy was jerking Zach, but Jeremy needed to be pressed against Zach’s body, his erect cock rubbing on the other’s skin until relief was achieved.

He felt a tear dribble down his cheek. Was it because he was happy to be with Bruce? Or, was it because he missed Jeremy so much? He sighed and felt the car stop. The engine was turned off and he opened his eyes. When he sat up Bruce leaned over and lightly kissed him.

“Enjoy your nap?” Bruce asked.

“Sorry to be such a party pooper,” Zach said.

“It’s okay, as long as you remember to be at the party later tonight.”

“When you fuck me?”

“We’ll see about that.”

“I thought you two were hungry,” Paul said, interrupting. “You know, you two do look sweet sitting together in the backseat of my car. Come on, guys, let’s go stuff our tummies.”

“I’m eating light,” Zach whispered. “I don’t want anything to interfere with that beautiful cock of yours when you shove it up inside me.”

“Will you stop!” Bruce exclaimed. “I told you I’ll consider doing that, but what happens next?”

“What do you mean next?” Zach asked.

“Afterwards, when you want to do me?”

“I don’t want to do you. Do you want me to do you?”

“No, I don’t think so.”

“So, I won’t. There that’s settled. Now you can do me with a clear conscious and no fear in your heart that what you don’t want might happen because it won’t if you don’t want it.”

“Are you two coming?” Paul said from the restaurant’s door.

“No, we’ll do that later,” Zach said.

“You’re horrible,” Bruce said. “That’s all you think about, isn’t it?”

“Pretty much.”

The boys went straight to Zach’s bedroom when they came back to the condo. Neither had stuffed himself, so they both knew what was on tap for the rest of the night, or at least until one or the other fell asleep. Zach went over to the window and pulled back the drapes allowing the cold dark night sparkling with city lights flood into the room. Lake Union was black smear circled with glowing orange orbs of street and security lighting. Most of the apartment and condo windows spread across Lower Queen Anne were dark, the residents snuggled up against lovers or alone in childhood, youth, or unhappy adulthood. He thought of them and their living situations and how his own seemed so incredible considering a year ago he was alone in his own bedroom branded as an abomination by scared Christians who could not envision one of their own doing unspeakable acts only vaguely mentioned in their book of godly rules.

Arms enveloped him as Bruce stood close behind pressing his clothing encased erection against Zach’s own cloth covered ass. Taut, muscled hands softly massaged his abdomen moving slowly up to his chest where strong fingers sought already erect nubbins of tender, excitable flesh. A hot breath whispered behind his ear while warm, moist lips kissed the sun darkened bare flesh of his neck.

“Close the drapes,” Bruce whispered. “I don’t want an audience.”

“Everyone’s gone to bed, which is where we should be.”

“Close the drapes,” Bruce whispered. He moved his hands over the front of Zach’s body then slipped them under his arms with fingers digging into unsuspecting ribs.

“You fucker!” Zach exclaimed as he tried to squirm away from the assault, but Bruce held on pulling his friend back away from the window.

Zach was helpless, unable to move as excruciating agony enveloped him. He was barely aware of Bruce pulling him, practically carrying him back toward the bed. His feet moved, but he wasn’t controlling their actions. They stopped and he was quickly spun around to face his tormentor.

Their lips met; or, rather Bruce pressed his against Zach’s and forced his tongue into the boy’s mouth far back to the throat. He kept Zach in his grip as he practically raped the other mouth with his tongue until Zach couldn’t take anymore. He was more than a little astonished at the vigor of Bruce and began to suspect he was in for something a lot more physical than a tender love session with someone who’d never done anything with another boy.

What surprised Zach the most, though, was his own response to the attack. His cock felt like it had shrunken as if splashed with cold water. His mind reeled in an attempt to find something, anything erotic with what Bruce was doing to him. The tongue overpowered his own pushing it away as it sought a clear path down his throat. The hands continued to tightly grip him. His knees felt weak, unable to support his body. Yet, the assault continued and he didn’t know what to do.

He felt his clothes being removed from his body and opened his eyes enough to see Bruce’s own clothes dropping away from them. It was almost as if someone else, some other entity was undressing them. More and more bare skin rubbed against other bare skin, yet Zach’s response was negligible. His cock was a miniscule lump of flesh frightened into submission. He felt a tear dribble down his cheek. He was losing. He’d lost. There was nothing to do except surrender and hope the victor might have a little decency left in him and allow Zach to die honorably.

“I told you to close the drapes,” Bruce said after he suddenly stopped forcing himself on Zach.

“What the hell was that?” Zach asked as he sat back onto the bed. He stared at Bruce’s sweat slick body glistening in the orange city light filling the room.

“Very well, I guess you haven’t learned your lesson yet,” Bruce said as he practically jumped onto Zach forcing his friend on his back. He held Zach’s arms against the bed cover and bent down to kiss him.

Zach turned his head and struggled against the renewed assault. A brief moment when Bruce attempted adjust his position over him was all Zach needed to throw Bruce over and he found himself straddling the stronger boy. He felt the erection pressed against his damp pucker. With one hand on the chest below him forcing it into the bed, he spat into the other and spread the wetness on the cock under him.

Zach closed his eyes and concentrating on relaxing only one set of muscles, he lowered himself down over Bruce’s need until he felt the pressure under his navel. He pulled up slightly then fell back. Up again, then down. Up, down, up, down, Zach tightened his muscles against the pleasure pole.

He looked down at an astonished face. He was getting his fuck whether Bruce wanted to give him one, or not. His own cock was pleasurably boning up as the sensations he sought tingled out of his ass. He was going to need a little stimulation so he took one of Bruce’s hands and placed it where it could be of use.

After a few minutes of vigorously bouncing on that rock hard erotic tool, Zach began to notice the a little additional thrusts coming as he bottomed out as if Bruce needed a bit more excitability, a bit more depth. His own cock was nearing the point of no return, there was no going back now, they were beyond stopping. Bruce’s grip tightened on him as his own muscles bore down on the stiff pole of flesh throbbing deep inside.

“Unnhh!” Bruce moaned as he thrust up and was rewarded with a splatter of Zach’s cum on his upper lip and into his nose. He thrust again and another splatter hit his lips. He ran his tongue over the slick offering and tried to force himself deeper into Zach. He felt another splatter of cum hit his chest.

Zach felt the cock inside him begin to soften and he pulled himself off. He lay down beside Bruce and wondered what had just happened. He knew he wasn’t experienced enough to know if what they’d done was something to be expected in the future with others, but, also, suspected he wanted to do this, again, if this is what Bruce needed to get off.

Bruce’s face turned to look at him. Zach leaned over and began to lick his cum off Bruce’s face. Their lips met sensuously in post-orgasmic bliss. Tongues playfully teased each other. Hands began to softly massage tense muscles and hardened nipples.

“What was that?” Zach asked.

“What?”

“What you were doing in the beginning. You know, forcing yourself on me.”

“Was I too forceful?”

“Yeah, kind of.”

“Sorry, I guess I got carried away. You felt so good to me. I know my cock feels better.”

“How about a shower?”

“Together?”

“There’s room for an army.”

“I don’t need an army.”

“No, you don’t, you’re an army all by yourself. Do you have muscles I can’t see?”

“I told you I work out. You should, too. Once you get rid of that cast.”

“Do you feel sleepy?”

“I’m sweaty. I’m going to take that shower. You can come with me or stay here and stink.”

“I like coming with you.”

“Me, too.”

When the boys came out of the shower—it was a shower, mostly, they kissed a bit and washed each other, but with one of Zach’s arms in a cast his contribution to the washing effort was somewhat less than Bruce wanted—they saw Paul sitting on the sofa. Zach immediately expected the worse.

“You boys should use some air freshener in here,” Paul said as he slowly stood up. “Did you at least use condoms?”

“We didn’t have time,” Zach said. “Besides, Bruce was a virgin.”

“But, you’re not,” Paul said. “Are you completely positive you haven’t picked up anything in all your wanderings?”

“I can count the number of guys I’ve done it with on one hand,” Zach said. “Can you?”

“My sex life is none of your business,” Paul said.

“So, why is mine your business?” Zach asked.

“Because, my dear Zachary, you’re not eighteen yet, and if you were to contract something that required a doctor’s intervention, we’d all be up shit creek without a canoe.”

“Yeah, you keep forgetting you’re just a kid,” Bruce said.

Zach and Paul looked at him as if he interrupted their fight.

“Hey, I’m the other party here,” Bruce said. “If you’re going to talk about Zach’s sex life, at least from now on, you’d better clue me in on a few of the details. Okay?”

“Sure, Bruce, we’ll do that,” Zach said. “So, Paul, what’s wrong?”

“I need to talk to Bruce,” Paul said. “It’s private, okay? Do you want to put some clothes on?”

“No, I’m comfortable being nude,” Bruce said. “Does it make you uncomfortable seeing me naked?”

“Yeah, kind of gets things stirring, if you know what I mean.”

Bruce picked up his boxers and slipped them on before following Paul out of the room. Zach went over and sat on the bed. He was tired and wanted to go to sleep soon, but his dick seemed to want a little more action. It wasn’t completely hard, but if Bruce touched in the right way, Zach knew it wouldn’t take him long to come.

He lay back across the bed and turned his head to stare out the open drapes. There was a light on and if anybody had been looking in with binoculars or a telescope from Queen Anne Hill, they would’ve seen more than he wanted to show off. He got up to close them and was standing at the cord when Bruce walked into the room with a glass full of water, which he set down on the nightstand next to Zach’s new prescription.

Zach knew right then something was up. Bruce was going to tell him something he didn’t want to hear and he probably was going to into a fit when Bruce told him anyway. He closed the drapes and walked back to the bed. Bruce was standing comfortably, not betraying the bad news he carried. Zach started fiddling with the elastic on Bruce’s boxers.

“Do you want me to take them off?” Bruce asked.

“You said you were comfortable being naked.”

“Nude, I said I was comfortable being nude,” Bruce said as he pushed his boxers to the floor then flipped them up in the air with one foot and caught them with one hand. He held them for a moment then tossed them onto his pile of discarded clothes.

“What’s the difference? Naked, nude, you don’t have any clothes on, either way.”

“You have sex when you’re naked. You sleep in the nude, walk around the apartment in the nude, and, if you’re very brave and a lot more sociable that me, you go nude at a clothing optional beach.”

“Do you know any clothing optional beaches?” Zach asked as he felt his dick get a little excited about the idea of going sunbathing au naturel.

“I think there’s one down in Oregon.”

“We could go and check out the guys.”

“I think there are girls there, too. It’s public.”

“Oh, yeah, heterosexual. The guys would all be interested in girls. I guess we’ll have to be nude here. So, what did Paul have to say?”

“Sit down.”

“Paul said sit down?”

“Come on, Zach, you’re going to have to take a pill and I don’t want to have to pick you up off the floor, even though I can.”

“That sounds sexy,” Zach said. “You could hold me like a baby. Paul can.”

“You never stop thinking of sex, do you?”

“No.”

Zach sat down and waited for the worse. He looked at his left hand expecting it to be quivering, but it was lying quietly on his thigh. Bruce sat down beside him and put an arm across his shoulders.

This is going to be big, Zach thought. Something’s happened to someone he knew and he wasn’t certain he wanted to hear the bad news, but he didn’t have much choice.

“First of all, your Uncle David is okay,” Bruce said.

“Oh, god, no, not him, too,” Zach whimpered. His mind reeled with images of his uncle being thrown through the windshield of his car, flying through the air after being hit in a crosswalk by a speeding car, or something bloodier, messier, mind-numbingly gross.

“No, Zach, don’t do this. I said he’s okay. The police got to him before he jumped. He’s okay. He’s in County for observation.”

“Oh, no, not that, no,” Zach stammered. His mind focused on the falling body and he knew what was happening earlier in the evening. He’d been falling with Uncle David. “Oh, god, Bruce, look at my hand. Is it moving? Is it?”

“Zach, calm down, right now,” Bruce said. He reached across Zach, whose body was beginning to quiver all over, and picked up the pill bottle. He knocked one into his hand.

Zach watched all of this as he felt himself falling away from the present. He was shaking now. He could feel all his muscles quivering. He opened his mouth so Bruce could put a pill in. Then he sat there with his mouth open and the pill resting on his tongue while Bruce got the water.

After he swallowed his medicine, Zach mostly watched Bruce pull down the covers on the other side of the bed. It was too far. He’d pass out before he got there. Bruce would have to pick him up off the floor.

Then Bruce came back and helped Zach to his feet. With one hand holding Zach, Bruce pulled back the sheet and blanket on Zach’s side. Zach wanted to say something, “good night,” maybe, but the quivering was uncontrollable. He sat back down with Bruce’s help. He sat for a moment as his mind began to empty itself of all thought and consciousness. When he couldn’t hold back any longer he fell over and curled up into a fetal position. Tears filled his eyes. He was falling, falling. As awareness slowly faded away, Zach felt the sheet and blanket being pulled over him and a warm body snuggled up against him. He reached out and pulled Bruce close to him, hugging him as if he was a giant teddy bear. In a final act of awareness, Zach let go of the railing and fell back into oblivion.