Secrets and Lies - 8. Alexander Barnes (The Implant)

Alexander Barnes

(The Implant)

It was just another morning, like so many others before. Doug had awoken with a slight headache that luckily had disappeared after having two cups of coffee. The doctors had not been able to help him and he had gotten used to the headaches over the years. Doug barely gave them a thought anymore. Two cups of coffee in the morning usually helped and Doug only needed a third cup later in the morning once or twice a month. He had given up his attempts at figuring out where the headaches came from. The doctors had found no reason for them. According to them, he was in good health. Doug thought they suspected that he was imagining the headaches, but this was clearly not true. He had come to the point to believe that he had suffered from the headaches since he was born, but a faint voice in his head told him that he was mistaken. The voice tried to point him at the truth, but he was not able to grasp it, however hard he tried. There was just the nagging feeling that he had missed a major point.

Doug worked in a coffee shop and he was under the impression that he had worked there for as far back as he could remember. He had once tried to figure out the number of months and he had looked for the pay slips everywhere in his apartment, but strangely he had not been able to find them. He had only found those of the past three years. He had convinced himself that he had thrown the others into the garbage when he had cleared out his apartment, which he usually did in spring. He had not dared to ask his boss when he had started work in the coffee shop for fear the man would declare him insane. His co-workers had all entered the job at a later time, so asking them was useless.

Doug entered the shop, got ready, and stood behind the counter. His shift had just begun. A couple of minutes had passed when suddenly the headaches returned. Doug was annoyed, but as luckily he worked in a coffee shop, he helped himself and filled a cup with coffee. He was about to take a sip when a client came to the counter and ordered a coffee. Doug put his cup aside, made the man coffee and handed him the cup. The man seized it hurriedly and dropped it. The hot coffee spilled on Doug’s hand and pain shot through his body. The pain was awful and seized his brain. Doug felt as if his head was exploding. He let out a cry and then fainted, at least this was what they told him later.

He awoke in the hospital where they had taken him to. A nurse called a doctor. The man examined Doug and then spoke to him calmly, although he wasn’t entirely able to hide his nervousness. Doug looked at him warily. Had they diagnosed a terrible disease? The doctor asked his name, his profession and many other things, and Doug answered truthfully. He finally dared to ask the man what was wrong with him. The doctor didn’t reply right away, but then said he would return an hour later and then Doug would be informed on everything. This convinced Doug even more that they had diagnosed a dangerous disease. He leaned back and gazed into the room, trying to cope with the inevitable that would soon be announced to him. The doctor left, but like he had said he returned an hour later in company of two men who didn’t look like doctors at all.

They introduced themselves, pulled duty passes from their pockets and showed them to Doug. They were FBI agents. Doug swallowed and gazed at them. The men exchanged a look with the doctor, and then they all sat down in chairs that they had pulled from a table in the room. The doctor cleared his throat.

"We have examined you profoundly as we thought you were suffering from an apoplectic fit and we found something odd in your head," he said.

Doug’s eyes widened in fear. He was certain they had found a tumor.

"Not what you’re thinking, Mister Barnes," the doctor said.

"Barker, my name is Barker," Doug replied, but he had slightly winced at the name. The name Barnes rang a bell, but he was not able to grasp why it did.

"Your name is Alexander Barnes," one of the agents said. "You participated in a secret program twelve years ago. You were granted exemption from punishment for it."

"What?" Doug asked in disbelief. He stared at the man.

"You had been sentenced to life imprisonment for the sexual abuse and murder of three boys," the other agent said.

Doug’s cheeks flushed at the reproach. "What?" he cried out. "This cannot be true." He shot the man an enraged look.

The man raised his hand.

"Calm, Mister Barnes," he said. "Listen, please. You pleaded not guilty, but the evidence was incriminating. You were sentenced to life imprisonment. The state started a program and looked for volunteers. You signed up for the program," he said.

"What kind of program?" Doug asked in confusion.

"A brain stem implant," the doctor said. "It was supposed to change the brain waves of the test person and thus alter the person’s behavior. We discovered the implant when we examined you and informed the police."

"What? Why the police? What the hell are you talking about?" Doug asked angrily.

The men exchanged a look.

"The implant was not mentioned in your digital patient card that your health insurance keeps," the doctor replied. "More so, the records start only twelve years ago. This all alarmed me because I had already heard of that program five years ago when another patient was taken here. He had been suffering from headaches for seven years. We found an implant in his brain also."

"To sum it up, Mister Barnes," one of the agents said. "You were released from prison and then you disappeared. Your name was Alexander Barnes when you were released, but you must have changed your name a short while later. In fact, you changed your entire identity. We suspect you were in touch with someone who knows how to do this, register you in the health insurance company’s computer and so on."

"A computer expert, a hacker," the other agent added.

"I have no idea what you are talking about," Doug said angrily. "I’m Douglas Barker and I have always been. I work in a coffee shop and…"

He fell silent. In fact, he did not know what else to tell them.

"You have been content with your life, waking up, going to work, going home, going to bed," the doctor said.

Doug gazed at him. "Um, yes," he said slowly.

The man was right. That was in fact all he had done in the past twelve years. Doug couldn’t remember anything else, at least nothing that was worth mentioning.

"No friends? No family?" one of the agents asked.

Doug looked at him. He realized that he had not been in touch with anybody for twelve years, apart from his boss and his co-workers. Now that he was thinking of it, Doug realized that he had not exchanged a lot of words with his boss in twelve years. And his co-workers came and left. None of them stayed a long time.

"No," he replied finally. "I have never really been thinking of it."

"The effect of the implant," the doctor said.

"The implant caused a serious damage to the brain, that was why the program was stopped," one of the agents explained. "In fact, only three of the forty-seven test persons have survived the surgery for a longer period of time. Thirty-nine died within six months, one person died five years ago in this hospital…"

"That was when I learned of the program," the doctor said.

The agent nodded and continued. "One person died two years ago in a car accident."

"And one person was missing," the other agent said. "Alexander Barnes. He had disappeared soon after he had been released from prison. We have identified you, Mister Barnes, by taking and analyzing your fingerprints. A genetic testing is currently under way. And we have identified the implant."

Doug gazed at them in shock. The faint voice in the back of his head told him to believe them. It said it was all true and Doug had a feeling that the voice was right.

"But how…" he started and fell silent.

"How did you manage to change your identity?" one of the agents asked. "We’re currently investigating," he said.

"Am I a murderer?" Doug asked in a brittle voice.

"No, Mister Barnes. The murderer made a confession ten years ago. He had murdered another boy, but was arrested. He confessed the crimes," the agent said.

"But you had disappeared," the other added.

"I don’t remember it," Doug said slowly. "In fact, I don’t remember a thing, neither what happened twelve years ago nor how my life was before I was sentenced to prison. I don’t remember the program and the surgery and how I managed to change my identity. To me it seems that my life started twelve years ago. I have been suffering from headaches in the morning for twelve years. I counted the years, so I’m certain on this. I also remember that I have worked in the coffee shop for many years, although I have only found the pay slips of the past three years. But I’m fairly sure that I’ve worked there for a longer time."

Silence fell. One of the agents cleared his throat. The other rose to his feet.

"We’ll be back tomorrow for another brief talk," he said.

The other man stood also and the two agents took their leave. Doug gazed at the door, and then turned his eyes to the doctor.

"What am I supposed to do now?" he asked in a desperate voice.

The man studied his face.

"There’s a minor chance that we can bring back your memories when we remove the implant," he said. "However, the surgery is difficult and I cannot promise you anything. And even if you can remember your earlier life and perhaps also your time in the prison, then you will have to cope with these facts and with the fact that you have lived a very monotonous life for twelve years."

He gave Doug a serious look. Doug was feeling very cold.

"You are thirty-five years of age, Mister Barnes," the doctor said. "You could well start anew. Think about it. It’s a minor chance, but if I were in your place, I would take it."

Doug looked at him. The doctor gave him an encouraging nod and then stood and left the room. Doug gazed at the opposite wall. He had lost his memories, his identity, and his life. He was feeling empty and tears filled the corners of his eyes.