W.T.F. Do I Make Of That? - 1. W.T.F. Do I Make Of That?

W.T.F. Do I Make Of That?!

 

What the fuck do I make of that?

I mean he hadn’t exactly said it to me, he hadn’t even been conscious when he’d spoken.

 

Shawn, a straight man, had given me just about the best sexual encounter I could remember, not that I’d had that many encounters with different men – and virtually none at all these past months.

But it was an encounter that could’ve been lost. I’d always groaned, silently or not, whenever that old chestnut was trotted out, you know the one that goes ‘To assume makes an ass of you and me’ but oh boy I’d learned my lesson on that score – and how!

Glenda had introduced me to Shawn, who’d had the good sense to put the kettle on, and mugs of tea in hand the three of us had settled into a corner of the kitchen; Shawn and Glenda had been expecting to drive home and I’d already had my quota of booze. A slight allergy means I tend to keep away from the hard stuff as it would often make my face itch and flush to a very unflattering tomato red so I tend to stick to cider, even so three halves were my limit and I was already a few soda and limes beyond them. Hence the tea.

I got a bit of a shiver when Shawn smiled at me as we said hello, the more we talked, especially after Glenda left us, the more my dormant libido came to life and although we may not have agreed on everything we’d talked about even when we disagreed we did it good-humouredly. It had been a beautiful night, well early morning, and Shawn had happily agreed to sit in the garden with me. A few people were sitting and standing around on the patio but I spotted that the garden swing was unoccupied so I headed towards it.

Our change of location hadn’t interrupted the flow of our conversation what did, briefly, was the appearance of Molly, a.k.a. Malcolm, Shawn’s friend. My significantly older cousin Brian and his partner Carrick owned the house where they were holding the after-party following a major heat of a competition they sponsored to find the UK’s best drag act; they’d offered me a room, and therefore dressing space, for the night and Molly had come to say that they’d been offered a room so Shawn’s tea-total stint was over if he wanted.

Another shiver had run through me when Molly had sat next to me and I’d had to shuffle closer to Shawn to make room; I’d briefly held my leg against Shawn’s to judge his reaction and he hadn’t moved his away. Not wanting to appear ‘full-on’ I moved my leg away but as Molly explained about them being able to stay over I allowed it to ‘accidentally’ drift back to rest against Shawn’s.

It’s a long time since I’ve given a guy so much as a second look, a couple of bad choices had put paid to my sex life. I no longer trusted my own judgment when it came to picking a partner and one-night-stands had never really appealed to me. I mean I’ve had a couple but out of desperation rather than one-nighters being my thing.

But Shawn, he felt different, acted differently to those bad choices I’d been involved with. He was really manly but in an easy kind of way; unlike some alpha-male gay men he wasn’t overbearing or even intimidating but he very definitely had presence – well to me he did.

When Brian called Molly away to give her rendition of “Memory” alongside Kylie I didn’t immediately move away from Shawn and he didn’t look as if he wanted me to. I’d pressed my palms to my thighs because when I’d contemplated what I hoped might happen they’d become clammy; this wasn’t like me but at some point I had to at least try to overcome my anxieties and Shawn seemed like a really good option for me to approach. Actually I was hoping he’d make the first real move.

Molly telling Shawn that they had a room got me thinking that it would probably be the only one with twin beds, Shawn had told me that he and Molly weren’t a couple, so I supposed Molly would’ve told Brian the same, but that didn’t necessarily mean that they didn’t get together occasionally and perhaps tonight they’d intended doing so. It did mean, however, that I had a legitimate reason for offering to show Shawn around the bedrooms, Brian’s home was an old rambling sixteenth century manor house with a couple of wings added later and it could actually take some navigating. When Shawn had asked if my offer to be his personal tour guide could actually be to just the one room my arousal had really kicked up a gear, I was hoping it was a more subtle than was usual way of asking to go to my room.

Even if Shawn hadn’t sort of hinted that he’d like to see my room seeing Molly and Phil getting it on in the dining room would, I’m fairly sure, have had him asking for the refuge I ended up telling everyone I’d offered.

He was incredibly kind, letting me take things forward how and at a pace which suited me and I was, for the first time in too long, enjoying myself.

I suppose I should explain myself at some point and now seems as good a time as any. I’ve been openly cross-dressing since I went to college away from home, in private I’d been doing so for a couple of years by then; I specifically chose the course I did because the city the college was in had a healthy gay scene. Indeed I’d never returned to live in my home town. I could never claim to be an ‘Alpha-male’, doesn’t mean I don’t have my own opinions though – contrary to what some of them believed; but wanting a ‘manly’, yet gay, man so far hasn’t worked out well for me. There’s always been a heavy price to pay.

So when I saw Shawn, tall, dark hair, strong angular jaw, his fabulous ass wrapped in the well-cut trousers of his dark blue suit, then passed time chatting with him I felt like I could overcome my anxieties.

Oh boy did I get that one WRONG!

But, weirdly, I sort of didn’t.

I swear my heart stopped when I realised that not only did Shawn truly believe me to be an actual, real, female he’s not, very definitely not, gay.

I managed to take myself from where he’d laid me on his body but I was shaking so much I knew I couldn’t have got up from the bed. At least I couldn’t see him lashing out at me given we were far from alone in the house but I know all too well that you don’t need to use a fist to really hurt someone. Then suddenly I felt him wrap an arm around my shoulders and pull me to him.

What was that all about?

Up to then Shawn had treated me better than anyone ever had, he’d let me lead things, he’d asked me what I’d wanted to do and he’d let me do it. Then he’d mentioned my ‘lady bits’ and things had come to a screeching halt.

Or had they?

Like I said instead of grabbing his clothes and doing a runner – which is what I’d expected – he’d pulled us close together, he’d even taken part of the blame on himself for the misunderstanding.

Christ! If only he was gay, or even bi, he’d have been a keeper but he wasn’t.

Typical of my luck.

Shawn threw me a curve ball when he spoke, there was no hint of disgust, no anger, he was as he’d been before – a gentleman; an old fashioned term I know but it’s the best way to describe his behaviour I can think of.

What really blew me away was him saying that us not carrying on wasn’t due to me being male – not entirely – it was because he couldn’t reciprocate. So I’d pushed my luck, not something I’d usually do, by telling him that if he really meant me being a guy wasn’t the only thing stopping us and that as I’d been enjoying myself so much already I could handle him not doing things to me then I was happy to carry on whether he touched me or not – and he’d agreed.

Jesus but the sex was fabulous.

I mean obviously I stayed dressed if Shawn was going to have his first man-sex I doubted he’d want to have it with a man.

 

For the first time in months I felt a cock, a really hard, well-formed, one sliding into me; best of all Shawn stayed still effectively letting me fuck myself on his wonderful dick. For a man who’d already admitted to being close to cumming Shawn’s self-control was surprising; I was jacking-off, pretty sure that regret would hit Shawn as soon as he climaxed, and I wanted to feel again what it was like to share that moment of orgasm.

“I could help you with that,” was what Shawn had said when he’d suddenly sat up, stroking my busy right hand.

My heart, already racing, thumped against my ribs when he’d offered to flip us both over so he could ‘nail my ass’ as had been offered earlier.

“Don’t care which, I just want you to fuck me,” I’d said.

But I did care, I wanted desperately for Shawn to fuck me. I wanted to feel him really enjoying my ass but I was too scared to say so; I didn’t want to put ideas in his head that might not be right for him. Well no more ‘not right’ than a straight man enjoying nailing the ass of a cross-dressing gay guy was ever going to be!

Dear God above.

Instead of simply laying back down as I’d expected, Shawn had quickly turned us over taking my hand from my cock and setting my arms to my sides then sliding them up the bed towards the pillows his own hands over mine as he rested most of his weight on me. It was exactly what I needed.

To have a lover who has self-confidence, without it meaning that actually they were merely demanding or selfish or both, was a dream and I’d found it – with a guy of the straight variety. So I did the only thing I could do – I enjoyed every stroke of his cock in and out of me.

Shawn had told me to stay still and I did for as long as I could but soon I needed him to fuck me harder. When I told him he shoved his upper body away from mine so he could do it. The change in the angle of penetration had him hitting my prostate bang on with every stroke. And my desperation grew immediately. I hadn’t realised that I’d verbalised my sudden, urgent, need to cum but I had and Shawn had responded by pulling my hips up from the bed and began taking me like a pro. He didn’t stop me from taking hold of my prick to jack-off; I moved my fisted hand on my cock in time with how Shawn was nailing my ass, as he’d termed it.

I knew even without his groan that Shawn had beaten me to the finish line and a small part of my brain was panicking at the thought that because he had our time together would be over once his orgasm was done and before he pulled away from me I hoped I could reach my own climax.

Then unbelievably Shawn had reached beneath me to wrap his hand around mine, squeezing my cock a little harder without slowing my actions. Seconds later my balls rose and spunk flew from my body; my brain blanked out everything else all I was aware of was how I was feeling. Every pleasure neuron in my brain was firing in response to what we’d done and I was literally buzzing all over.

That had been six weeks ago and I’d avoided going to see Molly performing in case Shawn was there. The fault was all mine, it was clear Shawn had meant what he’d said that he’d like us to be friends when we’d talked in the cold light of day but, because of my most recent experiences, I wasn’t sure I could face him in case he’d changed his mind.

Now, however, I was sure I’d have to because tonight there was a charity evening at one of Brian and Carrick’s clubs and I was due to go as part of a group; my ticket had been bought, travel arrangements made and new outfit picked out before I’d ever met Shawn.

Rumour control had it that he’d be there with a few of his and Malcolm’s friends who’d be there to see Molly for the first time did they but know it. My self-confidence had metaphorically face-planted on the pavement of life after two bad choices I’d made and although Shawn had made me feel good about myself again for just a few hours if that small happy memory was spoiled by him not wanting us to be at least cordial towards each other it would prove yet again that I couldn’t trust my own judgement when it came to men.

Anyone would have thought that I was suffering a bout of stage-fright had they noticed how much I was shaking when we got to the club. My eyes scanned the tables looking for Shawn but didn’t see him but I sure as hell felt him when he stood behind me as I waited to to be served at the bar.

“Still want that half of cider or are you willing to risk something stronger?” he’d asked quietly.

I looked over my shoulder at him, he was smiling so I smiled back,

“I think I’ll take you up on that offer of a tequila sunrise.”

“Are you here alone?” I had to know if the rumours were true.

“No, tonight’s the big reveal of Molly to our mates.”

“I’d heard that could be the case.”

“They know Malc’s doing a comedy spot but not about his alter ego.”

“Ooo, how d’you think they’ll react?” we’d stepped away from the bar once my drink, which he’d paid for, was in my hand.

“As I said to Malc I hope our friends are grown-up enough to see it for what it is, an act; if they’re not then I’ll be taking them to task. What about you, are you here with friends?”

I nodded, taking a sip of my Dutch courage.

“I know they won’t be as pretty as you but are they like you?”

I knew he was asking if they were all tv’s,

“Yes.”

“Would you,” he made it plain that whatever he was about to say applied to me and not my friends, “like to come and say hello?”

“Have you, do they know you’re friends with a tranny?”

“No, another big reveal, well only if you choose to let on. Not my secret to tell and I won’t if you don’t,” he smiled, and I sensed he wanted to see if his friends would be as taken in by my appearance as he’d been.

”Found you,” a voice I didn’t recognise called from behind me and from the look on Shawn’s face it could only be one of his friends; the German accent came as something as a surprise.

“Jenny this is Dieter, Dieter this is mine and Malc’s good friend Jenny.”

Ho-ly. Hell.

The Ayrian race does exist and a prime example of it was standing right next to me.

Really? Life was doing this to me again?

I was standing between two drop-dead handsome men, either of whom I’d count myself blessed to have a chance at and both were wrong for me.

“Are you joining us?” Dieter asked.

“Yes, come and say hello at least,” Shawn urged.

“I don’t want to intrude.”

“Please, it would be nice to have such a pretty lady sit with us,” Dieter added.

Shawn and I exchanged a swift, knowing, look,

“Ok, if you’re all gentlemen like Shawn I’m in for a very pleasant interlude,” I smiled at the blonde German god.

“I can’t speak for the rest of them but Shawn and I will protect your honour if they become too rowdy.”

Dieter turned towards the table they’d been allocated and as we followed him Shawn looped my arm through his, which came as a bit of a shock.

“Gentlemen this is Jenny, a friend of Shawn and Malcolm, be nice,” Dieter mockingly warned the four other men.

I shook hands in turn with Ben, Mark, Andy and Mick, all averagely good-looking but nothing like Dieter or even Shawn. I stayed to chat for a while but then went to find the friends I’d arrived with; before I left though Dieter asked if I’d like to dance later and throwing caution to the wind I said yes.

Between my friends and Shawn’s I had a fabulous night, Shawn took me for a whirl round the dancefloor before Dieter got a chance in the interval between the two halves of the evening’s cabaret laughing as we did when he told me that there’d been some very complimentary comments towards me from his pals, all of them still being under the illusion that my female persona was for real. We went back to their table to settle in for the second half. What Shawn hadn’t known and I had was that Molly was the headline act and I hadn’t let on, the look on his face when he finally twigged was brilliant!

Initially their friends were having too good a time to notice that Malcolm had yet to appear on stage and we two were both waiting to see if they caught on.

“What’s happened to Malc?” Andy asked Shawn from across the table.

“How the ruddy hell should I know? I haven’t seen him since yesterday,” Shawn shot back.

“I bet he’s bottled it,” Ben laughed.

“I know I would, I mean these acts are pros how’s he gonna compete with them?” Mick added.

The house lights went down and the crow quietened, a frisson of excitement shot through me as Carrick, the night’s MC walked on stage.

“Well here we are one and all, at the pinnacle of our evening’s entertainment. You don’t need me to waffle on about our headline act. Put your hands together in greeting for the divine, the magnificent, Miss Molly Muffins!”

Everyone I could see, stood to applaud her appearance.

Even my jaw dropped, as the curtain rose much slower than for any of the other acts it revealed, little by little, Molly’s stunning long legs sheathed in shimmery stockings until finally the ruffled hem of a skirt appeared riding high, very high, on her thighs whilst the back of it fell to her ankles, above it Molly wore a tight-laced corset all of it sparkling with rhinestones and sequins on the pink and black satin.

She looked phenomenal.

The number and volume of wolf-whistles had increased with every inch of her legs as it was revealed but when she was standing there in all her glory they were joined by another thunderous round of applause and cheering.

Frigging hell!” Andy yelled above the noise, “No wonder Malc had second thoughts about going on if he knew that’s what he was up against.”

“No, please don’t,” Molly smiled as the applause died down, “please don’t stop.”

Laughter rippled through the audience as Shawn and I got comfortable to enjoy Molly’s act.

Thank god for waterproof mascara is all I can say, I laughed so hard my face hurt. Molly was called back for two encores, after the second one when the crowd had finally stopped their clapping and cheering she waited.

“If we haven’t just seen the competition winner there’s no justice in the world,” Shawn said to me quietly in the few moments before Molly spoke again.

“Thank-you,” Molly said with conviction into the quiet venue, “not only for your indulgent appreciation of my fellow performers and myself but mostly for your generosity towards tonight’s charity. According to our hosts Brian and Carrick,“ quiet cheers and applause broke our briefly, “between the tickets you bought to be here tonight and the auction pledges you made you’ve raised over eighteen thousand pounds,” Molly put her hands together as if in prayer then bowed to the audience.

“Before I leave to enjoy the rest of the night I just have a couple of last things to say. Any of you gentlemen callers intending to visit my room ditch the flowers, I’m allergic, there’ll be a tribute box by the door, it only accepts notes,” Molly swept a pouting look around the room as she waited for the laughing to die down, “also I have a few words for a couple of my friends; Malcolm you’re just about the worst dresser a girl could have but on the night you stepped up as only a true pal would and Jenny thank-you for offering him refuge when I was otherwise engaged.”

The stage lights went off but it felt like Shawn and I were in the spotlight given the intensity of the looks we were getting from the other five at the table as the truth finally dawned for each of them.

Molly was Malcolm.

This, if ever was when they’d start to second-guess my own true identity I was sure. Actually they didn’t, firstly because they were too stunned at Molly being Malcolm and secondly because her words had implied that Shawn and I had had a bit of a fling but they all knew their friend was straight therefore I must be female.

“What the fuck?” Mick exclaimed, “That was Malc?”

“Yes,” I answered quickly, “as you can tell Molly’s bloody popular,” I was determined to keep that positive thought foremost in their minds.

The four Brits fired questions at Shawn about how long Malc had been performing, how long Shawn had known about it and so on but Dieter, who was sitting on the other side of me to Shawn, leaned closer to me and asked,

“Are you and Shawn still an item?”

“No, absolutely not, no,” I replied as quietly as he’d asked.

“Well it’s good you’ve stayed friends,” he smiled.

Oh sugar, not again, please not again.

“It is,” I smiled back.

“Dieter, did you know?” Ben called.

Under the cover of their conversation I tapped Shawn’s foot when he looked at me I briefly tilted my head towards the bar behind us hoping he’d realise I wanted to talk to him.

“Don’t know about you lot but after that performance I’m in need of a celebratory drink,” he declared, “fancy giving me a hand?” he looked pointedly at me.

“Sure,” I smiled, “excuse me, won’t be long,” I said to Dieter.

“That’s optimistic, looking at the crush at the bar,” he replied.

“Ah, but I’ve got a secret weapon for slicing through it.”

I’d spotted Brian – tonight not in drag himself – heading our way and waved him over,

“Brian, let me introduce Molly’s friends,” we’d exchanged a hug before I’d spoken and I’d taken the opportunity to explain in a whisper that these of Malcolm’s friends hadn’t known about Molly before tonight and that only Shawn knew about Malc and Phil.

“We were just heading to collect a round to celebrate Malc’s performance,” Shawn explained.

“In that case follow me,” Brian told us.

At the bar Brian joined the staff behind it, he grabbed a couple of ice buckets, filled them with ice and water which was quickly followed by bottles of decent champers then a tray was loaded with glasses.

“My treat,” he laughed when Shawn offered to pay.

“”Cheers Brian, I’ll tell the lads.”

“Before we head back I need to talk to you about Dieter.”

“So talk.”

“Not here, we can leave this lot with them then hit the dancefloor, if you wouldn’t mind.”

“Let’s dance as Bowie once sang.”

We left the bubbly and glasses with his friends and found space amongst the other dancers. I quickly explained that, much as I knew I was probably wrong, I’d sort of picked up that Dieter might have become interested in me.

“I can’t not tell him, I’m not doing that again, especially not knowingly, even though things didn’t work out so badly as I recall,” I smirked, “but if I do tell him I promise I won’t let him think anything actually happened between us.”

“Leave it with me honey, I’ve known him for ages I’ll be gentle with him,” Shawn sniggered.

“Molly, I mean Malcolm’s just appeared from backstage. I’ll have a word with Dieter after I’ve warned the lads Malc’s on his way, you come back with him.”

“Thanks I know I’m asking a lot given we’re not exactly best bosom buddies,” I replied.

“Oh I think we got a lot closer than mere buddies,” Shawn smirked, “now go on, shake that tush, I’ve got a pal to explain something special to.”

Brian and Carrick were waiting for us when Malc and I got to the table his friends occupied.

“You out-did yourself young Malcolm, that was a brilliant set,” Carrick announced, holding up his champagne flute in salute, as did Brian.

I kept a little behind Malcolm, Shawn and Dieter were on the opposite side of the table and by the look he gave me I figured Shawn must have dished.

But it wasn’t a bad look.

As soon as everyone had followed suit and raised their glasses towards Malcolm the questions came thick and fast from four of the other men at the table. Mostly there were exclamations of surprise and congratulations but none of them made any kind of derogatory remark or cast dubious looks towards their friend. In fact they were exuberant in their praise.

Malcolm gradually made his way around the table to greet his friends but I stayed put, Shawn shot me a wickedly sinful grin and winked at me just before Malc got to him and Dieter.

“That was outstanding mate, I said to Jenny that if we hadn’t just seen the winner then there’s no justice.”

“Winner? This was a competition?” Dieter asked.

“No, the competition final’s in a few weeks at our biggest venue in Leeds,” Carrick informed him, “should any of you gentlemen wish to acquire tickets let me know I’m sure we can squeeze you in.”

“We’ll be there,” Ben shot back, “I’m thinking we should start a fan-club,” he laughed.

“Will you be there Jenny?” Dieter asked me.

“Already got my ticket.”

“Good, then I insist you come with us,” he said, “in fact we can make the arrangements as we dance,” he held out a hand towards me and the other towards the dancefloor, I saw Shawn nod once, it was barely perceptible but as my eyes were fixed on him and Dieter it was enough.

“Sounds good,” I accepted his offer but I was preparing myself for the bad news.

Dieter took hold of my hand, squeezing it gently as we made our way between the tables and through the crowd.

“You don’t have to do this you know,” I said as we reached the dancefloor.

“If I wish to talk to you it is the best place and I do. Shawn has told me about you Jenny. He explained that you two got on very well at a party a short time ago, that our friend Molly was alluding to that night and that he thinks of you as a special friend. I would like to do the same if you would allow it.”

He held me closer than was strictly necessary as we moved, that closeness and his accent were really getting to me.

“You’re willing, as a straight man, to have a gay tranny as a friend?”

“Why not? Jenny you are not the first person like you I’ve met, there are many here tonight, but you are exceptional. I’ve never come across anyone as convincing as you only those who have transed, have I got that right?”

“Yes you have and before you ask no that’s not where I’m heading. I dress this way most of the time but I have no desire to be anything but male.”

“And no desire for anything but a male lover,”

“That’s right,” I murmured.

“Is that only gay male lovers?”

I looked at him wide-eyed, surely Shawn hadn’t ‘fessed all about our night together, he hadn’t had enough time I’d have thought.

“Er, no, not necessarily,” lame, I know, but the only thing I could think of to say.

“Good,” Dieter smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkled, “so you might allow me to take you out to the cinema maybe or to dinner perhaps?”

“Am I being asked on a date?” I all but gasped.

We’d stopped moving, I was so stunned I felt as if my feet had been nailed to the floor.

“Of-course, the first of several I hope.”

I shook my head trying to re-start my brain, this brief encounter was . . . . well it just was.

Dieter’s brows furrowed,

“Is that a no?”

“No, it’s not a no. I’m just, look are you sure? I mean I’m deeply flattered obviously you being,” I stopped myself in time I’d been about to say he’s hot as hell, “but what will your friends say?”

“Komm bitte mit mir, I’m sorry I revert to Deutsch when I cannot, I want less noise,” he was looking round for somewhere to go.

“Come with me, I know a quiet place,” being related to the owner had its privileges and being able to get backstage is one of them.

The venue was originally a theatre and there were some decent, proper, dressing rooms but I wasn’t heading for them, I wanted the old dresser’s room – it was the furthest away.

“In here,” I told him as I opened the door and switched on the light.

“Before you say anything yes I accept but I need to be sure of a couple of things. Like I said what about your friends and please tell me this isn’t the booze talking.”

“I’ve drunk a little but I am not so drunk I don’t know what I am doing. Shawn told me that you’re a sweet young lady who he thinks very highly of, he said that if I did anything that hurts you he will be angry.”

“He said that?”

“No, his words were ‘hurt Jenny and I will rip you a new one, which given where we are is appropriate’.”

I really tried not to laugh but come on could you resist?

“I can’t believe he said that. That’s so nice. I mean you being threatened isn’t nice it’s just nice to know I’ve got so loyal a friend,” I eventually managed to say.

“And you must have a very strong character, you are brave enough to be yourself, and if yourself comes looking as pretty as you do why would I not want us to date?”

This straight man was asking a gay tv on a date and he was calling me brave?

“I really don’t want to be the cause of friction between you and your friends.”

“You won’t.”

“Have you done this before?”

“If you mean have I asked someone like you on a date? No I have not. But I have had fun with another man, more than one, but they were not like you.”

“Dieter are you gay?”

“No.”

“Oh, okay, so why?”

A corner of his mouth twitched up and bugger me if it didn’t make him look even more attractive.

“My grandmother used to tell me to be adventurous in life, but not in restaurants and I believe she was right.”

“So I’m an adventure?”

I’d perched myself on the front of the desk, Dieter was on the chair in front of it but now he stood up and closed the space between us to put himself really close to me,

“Not you, but we could have an adventure together, yes?”

Our relative positions meant I was looking up at him and what with that smile and his accent and his good looks and, well all of him really I found myself nodding.

“Where we go what we do you choose.”

“Um, no, the gentleman should choose, surprise me.”

“The first date we agree what we do, when I know you better I can pick something interesting.”

“Sounds like fun.”

“If we have dinner we could talk, find out what we both like and then I can take you out to do something I think you’d like.”

“Ok, but if we’re going to dinner surprise me with where we’re going.”

“I will do that.”

“You must promise me something, if your friends don’t like you being with me you must tell me, please.”

“They won’t but I promise.”

 

. . . .

 

Molly nailed the final!

To be honest I think there’d have been a riot if she hadn’t won. And I was there with Shawn, Dieter and the rest of Molly’s close friends to see it.

It had taken two weeks and four dates for Dieter to kiss me, which had been brilliant. Shawn had insisted, when I’d told him that I was going on a date with Dieter on the night of the charity gig, that I give him my number,

“So I can keep an eye on my special friend.”

“In case you need to rip Dieter a new one you mean,” I’d laughed.

“Precisely, well that and I should’ve got it at Brian’s party. My bad as they say.”

Since then we’d spoken on the phone a couple of times a week, he’d come to mine for supper – with no expectation of anything more – when I’d asked him if any of their close friends had commented on Dieter and I seeing each other, he’d assured me that nothing negative had been said, along the way I’d acquired a good friend come big brother and it made me feel good, better than I have in a very long time.

Ok, so maybe the excitement of the Molly’s win got to me, or perhaps I simply felt so much better about life generally, either way I was ready - that was the night Dieter and I slept together for the first time.

If Shawn had treated me well Dieter took that to a whole other level,

“Only if you are sure,” had been his response when in the midst of the celebrations for Molly’s win I told Dieter that I wanted us to take things further.

Sure? Sure?!

I’d been fantasising about him virtually every night for weeks!

We’d dined and danced, been to the cinema, gone bowling, he’d even taken me to an art exhibition – renaissance man indeed. Now I needed to know if the gradual pace of our dating was, well if he wanted it to go anywhere. Specifically if he wanted me.

“I am.”

He gave me a megawatt smile and pulled me to him, proving, I should add, that he was probably as keen as me to do more.

“I think we should go to your home, where you would be most comfortable, I will tell the mini-bus driver what route to take so that you and I are the last to be dropped off if you like. But I want you to tell Sawn.”

“Why?”

“Because he’s told me that you have had bad times and I want you to be sure it will not happen with me. If Shawn knows I am at your home I hope you will feel less anxious.”

Oh hell.

This wasn’t good, well it was great actually but essentially it was bad because every time Dieter treated me so well, far better than I’d become used to, I fell for him more. And I greatly doubted that Dieter wanted that from me, after all this was only supposed to be an adventure. So I would keep my feelings to myself and carry on being adventurous.

“Welcome to chez me,” I said as I closed my front door behind us.

”Shawn told me that your home is very welcoming and he was right. It is much like you.”

I by-passed the ‘cup of coffee or nightcap’ routine, for once in my life I was taking what I wanted and what I wanted was Dieter. I began giggling as I thought about what he’d said as I took his hand to guide him to my bedroom.

“Did I say something funny?”

“Not the way you think, it’s just odd knowing that you and Shawn talk about me that’s all. I mean he’s straight, I’m gay and you’re an adventurer; I wonder what Molly would make of that.”

“Perhaps one day we can tell her.”

“Look, Shawn’s still getting over the portrayal of him being her dresser,” I laughed, “you should’ve seen his face the first time he saw it, it was hard to choose between watching him or Molly so don’t go giving her any more ammo.”

This was it, I’d opened my bedroom door but gone no further,

”Yes or no?” I whispered.

My heart was racing, my legs were physically shaking, if he said no at this late stage I didn’t know what I’d do. It would be embarrassing beyond belief for starters but it would definitely confirm that I had no clue about choosing a lover.

“Yes, of-course yes,” he murmured before kissing me.

It began as a gentle press of his lip against mine but as he walked me backwards into the room he wrapped his arms around me and the kiss deepened; his tongue invaded my mouth his right hand at the back of my head giving me no escape – not that I wanted one – from his embrace.

Dieter’s left hand slowly moved down my back to my behind which he didn’t squeeze but stroked; I’d wrapped my arms round his waist but now I too lowered my hands to copy his actions. This was as far as we’d gone in the past and now I was stumped; Dieter had never pushed me to do more or asked for more than this but as ever when it came to truly instigating ‘the deed’ I wanted a confident man to take it forward.

“May we lay down?”

I nodded and he looked at my bed then me, I kicked off my shoes then knelt on the bed so I could move to the far side, Dieter also shucked off his shoes before sitting on the bed one long leg on it the other not his foot on the floor.

“I have something to tell you, I know about you and Shawn.”

My jaw dropped,

“He told you?” I gasped.

“I asked, several times, why he thinks so much of you so he asked me to his place and said that what he had to say needed to be private. Shawn is very fond of you, of Jenny, but not, I think as a lover again.”

“I didn’t think he’d ever tell anyone.”

“He was the same but he knew we had been seeing each other, he and I have talked about it, he said that he and Malcolm and others did not want you to be hurt again, you are cared for by many. Shawn knows I would not willingly hurt you, I would be another of those who care for you but I want to be more if you do too.”

 

To say I was astounded is a gross understatement, I mean I had no intention of ever spilling the beans about Shawn and I, those few hours together; firstly because I understood that as a straight man it wasn’t something he’d want to be generally known, secondly, and far more importantly to me, it had been too special to share.

“I’d like that,” I whispered.

I laid down to his right on my side facing him, my head propped on my hand and he mirrored my position.

“Dieter I know you have had more than one male lover but you’re not gay, you don’t say that you’re bi, you must’ve had girlfriends, ones you’ve had relationships with I mean, but you’ve been dating a man and if I didn’t misunderstand you want us to carry on dating and now to take it further. That’s one hell of a leap.”

“The leap is only between dating a man and dating a man who is a pretty lady.”

I loved the way that he rarely referred to me in the male and if he did it was always balanced by including the female persona I wore.

“You’ve dated a guy?”

“When I lived in Berlin, we were together for over a year, it ended when he was posted back home to Durban and I got the promotion that brought me here.”

I shook my head, I’d never come across anyone so open to life, I wished I was as brave as him,

“I can’t get my head round you,” I laughed, “you never cease to astound me. I take it he wasn’t a cross-dresser.”

“Not at all.”

“You are unique, I think life with you in it could turn out to be a roller-coaster ride,” I chuckled.

“An adventure I hope.”

“Oh it’s already been that alright!”

“Tonight shall we be adventurous?”

“Yes please,” the racing heart was back.

“Shawn told me that you are very giving which did not surprise me but I want us to share Jenny.”

“Shawn didn’t only take, it almost became a disaster because he wanted to share.”

Dieter nodded from which I gathered Shawn must have told him about the moment of revelation.

“How shall I share, with Jenny or Cameron?”

“Jenny please.”

“Show me.”

So I did.

Figuring that Shawn had been truthful in what he’d told Dieter about us but not detailed I began as I had that night by unbuttoning his shirt, he went further and took it off straight away.

Hot. As. Hell!

Across his chest was a smattering of short hairs as blonde as that on his head, his nipples were darker than I’d imagined and I couldn’t resist sucking and licking them; I moved closer to him and pressed my fingertips to his left shoulder encouraging him to lay on his back. He let me spend time stroking and kissing his body,

“May I?” I asked as I ran a finger behind the waistband of his trousers.

“Please do.”

As when I’d unbuttoned his shirt as soon as his trousers were undone Dieter shoved them – and his socks – off.

Silk boxers?

Dark green ones as it happens, then I recalled the feel of his shirt beneath my fingers and realised it must be made of the same stuff. Dieter turned onto his right and leaned towards me but he didn’t stop when our bodies touched he leaned further so I was on my back.

“My turn.”

Even though the fairly short time I’d spent with Shawn truly had been one of the best of my life and he hadn’t only taken he’d never actually touched me. Dieter slowly drew a hand, well fingertips, from my knees up where my thighs met to my stocking-tops where he stopped to stroke the bare skin that was just beyond the hem of my skirt.

“Yes,” I whispered.

My eyes closed, this was the first time anyone had touched me like this anywhere in over a year. Remember those couple or three one-nighters I mentioned? Well let’s just say they didn’t happen anywhere like a bedroom, there was no space for touching, no time for finesse with I-can’t-be-bothered-to-remember-your-name. I’m not proud of them; in my defence I only ever indulged when I went to a couple of trade expos so I could go to clubs where I was unlikely to be known and less likely to bump into anyone I knew. If he did no more this could be enough.

“You must not allow me to go too far.”

I nodded quickly – in my head I was thinking there may never be a ‘too far’ with this guy.

When he stroked the crease where my thighs met my pelvis simultaneously with a thumb and fingertip my hips rolled to meet his touch and my head tilted back,

“Wow!” I gasped.

I hadn’t been aware of just how aroused I’d become by simply exploring Dieter’s body. The way he was touching me was fabulous.

“And here?” he asked just as his fingers moved down to where my cock was tucked firmly away.

My legs opened of their own volition, my brain still being lost in how good it all felt, how good I felt.

“Je-sus!” I cried when he stroked over my confined prick.

I heard Dieter snigger,

“Something to tease you with again.”

“Whenever you like,” I murmured.

“I would like to go dancing with you and in a quiet corner I could do this to you, so that you are ready for me when we get to bed.”

“I would be anyway.”

He carried on stroking my thighs, my groin and my dick for a long time.

“Please, I want more,” I spoke quietly.

“Here,” he applied a little more pressure to my prick then moved his fingers to press them against my hole through my underwear, “or here?”

“Everywhere,” I gasped.

“Where are the things we need?”

“Drawer,” I answered, pointing to the nightstand behind him.

He rolled over and when he had I asked him to not turn back until I was ready, this was when I’d asked Shawn to close his eyes,

“Can I really touch you now?” he asked when I told him he could turn back.

“Please,” I nodded.

He began again, stroking up my legs, to the so-called giggle-band above the stocking-tops, then the creases at my groin, this time first left then right and just as before down towards my dick.

Somebody whimpered – oh yeah me.

My hands were holding onto the pillow either side of my head, Dieter moved to kneel between my legs so I parted them a little more; his hands slid up the outside of my thighs raising the hem of my skirt as they moved. He blew across the tip of my cock and my whole body shook. He used just one finger to tease it, first moving the fingertip in circles over the head then in more circles down the length and back up.

With my mind in a whirl my body was making decisions of its own, my knees had bent so my feet were on the bed meaning I could raise my hips to meet his touch. At the same moment Dieter took hold of my dick he pressed a finger between the cheeks of my ass and against my boy-hole. He’d obviously made good use of his time looking in the nightstand drawer well because he’d clearly found the lube if the way his finger slipped easily over my hole was anything to go by. My toes curled when he almost-but-didn’t push his finger into me. I was breathing heavily in time with how Dieter was fisting my prick. I felt his weight shift on the mattress and opened my eyes to see why.

Mother of God!

He was lowering his head, he was going to blow me.

“Dieter, slowly, please,” I wailed.

I really can’t recall the last time anyone had given me a blow-job - two, three years probably – with everything else he’d done if Dieter sucked too hard, or moved his head too quickly too soon I’d lose my load in seconds. He did what I wanted not only in moving his head slowly the hand he’d had on my balls and the finger on my sphincter moved equally so. I rocked my hips in time with how he was sliding his mouth up and down my pole and even though our movements were slow I was soon on the brink.

“Dieter I’m close,” I gasped.

“Mmm,” his groan sounded like someone had presented him with his favourite food or drink; the vibrations heightened my arousal and my breathing quickened.

He must have noticed, either that or he’d felt my balls rise under his fingers because the next thing I knew he’d thrust his finger far enough into my ass to tease my prostate and my dick was down his throat.

“Now, now, now,” I gabbled as my body jerked and my cock pumped my jizz into Dieter’s mouth.

He didn’t stop sucking and swallowing until long after my orgasm had stopped and his finger kept moving inside me. My head was reeling, my eyes had rolled back in my head and every muscle trembled as I was swamped by the incredible way Dieter had made me feel.

“That was un-frigging-believable!” I gasped – eventually.

“My pretty lady can have a dirty mouth,” Dieter chuckled, he’d let go of my prick, my ass was empty and he’d moved to cage my body beneath his.

“And yours isn’t?” I smirked.

I raised my head and kissed him, tasting a little of myself on his lips. He began to rub his cock against me and whether it was my mouth or my ass he chose I needed to feel it inside me. I moved against him enjoying the way our bodies moved so easily, instinctively, together. I looked up at him, wanting more of him.

“Now?” I mouthed.

“I would like us to go further, if you are ready.”

I nodded, I could feel that his dick was probably a little longer ad thicker than average, but not greatly so, and it was incredibly hard; even against my body not in my hand it felt solid. He leaned across to the still-open drawer and passed a condom to me, I ripped open the foil as I watched him lower his boxers and slide them from his legs. I reached out to stroke it as gently as he had mine with one finger before wrapping my fingers and palm round it.

Jeez it was fabulous.

But I was getting desperate to feel it inside me so I rolled the latex down its length then I pointed to the lube he’d left on top of the nightstand and held my hand out for Dieter to pour some of the gel into my palm. He pressed a thumb to the base of his cock to hold it away from his body for me to smear the lube all over the condom. When I had he put his hands under my knees and raised them until my feet were again flat on the quilt which I was gripping with both hands, my desire now so powerful it was almost painful.

Dieter nestled his cockhead against my boy-hole then put his hand under my right calf and rested it on his shoulder, when he had he leaned forward taking most of his weight on his forearms. My body bowed beneath his when he slid his dick into my ass, my hips rolling up to meet his thrust.

“Jesus, Mary and Joseph,” I cried when he’d got me impaled on his full length.

“No just me, he smirked as he lay still within me.

I’ve seen, wanked and sucked longer and thicker pricks but Dieter’s cock felt as if it was made to be in my ass. When he began moving, slowly at first, I lay still beneath him enjoying the feeling of being trapped under his weight.

I couldn’t resist for long though but when I tried to answer his thrusts with my own Dieter leaned further forward pressing my right knee almost to my shoulder.

“Tell me how Jenny, slow or fast, this way or another?”

“Like this, please don’t move us, faster harder.”

“Is this what my pretty one needs?”

He slammed his dick as high into me as he could then moved his hips as hard and fast I’d ever known before; his position meant that, as when he’d had his finger inside me, my prostate was being tormented by every move he made. My cock rose and hardened again which hadn’t happened to me a second time so quickly in years. Dieter’s body rubbing against my hard-again pole emphasised what he was doing to me.

“Will you cum for me again Jenny?”

“Yes, oh hell yes! For fuck’s sake don’t stop.”

Unbelievably he somehow managed to reach round to my left leg and hook it over his shoulder bending me double. It felt amazing but meant I couldn’t move, it left him in charge of both our orgasms.

“Are you ready for me my sweet lady?”

“Mmm,” I groaned, my hands were now gripping his shoulders.

“Then take me,” he murmured quietly just before his lips touched mine.

His dick swelled briefly then twitched as his seed flowed from him, even then he kept sliding in and out of me until I felt my spunk spurting from my dick. We were both breathing heavily, I looked up at him and Dieter smiled at me,

“Are you good Jenny?”

“Good doesn’t even begin to come close to how I feel,” I grinned, “you?”

“Wunderbar,” he grinned back.

He slowly lowered my legs as he kissed me again,

“Where is your bathroom?”

“Next door.”

“Give me a moment and I’ll deal with things.”

I nodded, wondering if he was already contemplating making his exit now we’d done the deed, he snagged his boxers as he moved away from me and I sighed in resignation at the thought of him leaving. I closed my eyes when I heard water running and tried to envision what would happen when he came back.

“You are still dressed, do you mean to sleep like that?”

“Um, no, but I didn’t know what you wanted to do,” I couldn’t look at him as I spoke.

He lay next to me,

“Jenny I do not leave someone who has given me so much pleasure alone, but if you do not want me to stay I will leave.”

I shook my head.

“You are worried about me meeting Cameron yes?”

I nodded.

“I think it is time I did.”

“Okay,” I whispered, well croaked actually my throat being so constricted with nervousness.

I made to get up but he stopped me,

“Jenny it is not a problem for me. I’ve always known that Cameron is beneath your dresses and make-up have I not?”

“I know but,” he laid a finger on my lips.

“There are no buts between lovers Jenny; in the bathroom I saw a dressing-gown why don’t you undress in there and wear it when you come back?”

“Okay but,” I held up a hand to stop the interruption I could see he was about to make, “I was going to say but why don’t I make us a drink while I’m gone?”

“That kind of but I like,” he smiled.

“Tea, coffee?”

“What are you having?”

“Possibly the same as you.”

“Coffee please.”

“You get comfy and I’ll be back soon,” I had a plan.

I grabbed a couple of things besides my robe from the bathroom, once I’d re-dressed, before heading to the kitchen. In the time it took for water and milk to warm I’d pulled my hair into a ponytail and used wipes to remove my make-up – checking I’d done a decent job of it in the hallway mirror before returning to my bedroom.

What Dieter wouldn’t have seen was that hanging beneath my full-length robe was a matching nightgown, they were both old gold silk satin printed with small pink flowers, the negligee had thin straps and a low-ish scoop neckline, it too fell to my ankles.

“One strong coffee as preferred by your good self,” I smiled as I set his cup on the nightstand closest to him, he was sitting propped against the headboard his long legs under the quilt.

“What’s that?” he asked, pointing to my own lidded cup which looked like an over-large, whipped-cream topped cup cake complete with a cherry atop it, as I took off my robe.

I didn’t answer until I was sitting next to him,

“Hot chocolate,” I smiled as I took off the lid.

“Even now you are still my Jenny,” he chuckled.

Hang on, he said ‘my Jenny’.

I nodded, hiding my shock at his words behind taking a sip of my drink.

“Good coffee, but no-one said there could be hot chocolate,” he looked at me with his brows furrowed but he was smiling.

“Most guys don’t appreciate hot choccy.”

“I’m German, we have a lot of exceptionally good hot chocolate,” he chuckled.

“Then I’ll make you one the next time,” I stopped – he’d not suggested that there be a next time.

“No, the next time you must come to my home and I will make you the best hot chocolate you’ve ever had.”

“Bragging much?”

“In fact no, but better than that come to Berlin with me, there is much I would like to show you and there I will treat you to hot chocolate as it should be.”

My jaw dropped – he wanted us to go away together!

“Do you not want to go with me?”

“Yes,” I shook myself from my shock, “I’d love to but you don’t half know how to scramble my eggs,” I laughed.

“What is that?”

“Scramble my eggs? It’s the same as saying that my head’s a shed or you’re doing my head in. It means confusion I suppose.”

“You are confused?”

“Yes, well sort of. Sometimes, many times, you say things I don’t expect.”

“That is bad?”

“With you, no.”

He put his empty cup aside and slid down the bed on his side facing me,

“I like this,” he stroked across my body over my nightgown.

“It’s one of my favourites.”

“Good then you must bring it to Berlin.”

“Er, when were you thinking of us going?”

“As soon as possible.”

“For how long?”

“Why not a long weekend the first time?”

“The what?”

“Well if you like Berlin would you like to be there for Christmas? It is magical.”

Christmas?

Christmas was three months away!

. . . .

“Thank-you,” I kissed Dieter briefly, “thank-you,” I did it again, “thank-you,” my third kiss was longer, “you were right, Christmas in Berlin is magical.”

For me it was magical because I was here with Dieter.

It was Christmas Eve and we were dancing in a cabaret club where we’d had dinner as dancers, a magician and a singer had performed and Dieter had told me about a similar but bigger and more famous cabaret venue called ElDorado which had been closed by Hitler’s thugs in the thirties. I’d been surprised by just how gay-friendly the city was, even more so when Dieter had told me about how it had been before the Nazis had come to power when there’s been over a hundred gay clubs and a quarter as many lesbian ones.

I looked around our luxurious surroundings, I’d been to many gay clubs in Britain but none could compete with this; I couldn’t help but wonder how Molly would be received here.

“You look wonderful, liebchen.”

We’d been shopping the day before for my outfit which Dieter had insisted on buying, as my Christmas present. Well that’s what I’d believed it to be until he said,

“Come back to our table I have a gift for you.”

I looked at my cocktail watch, it wasn’t yet past midnight, not quite,

“Dieter you’ve already bought me everything I’m wearing and besides it’s still Christmas Eve.”

“Ah, but in Germany tonight is when we exchange gifts.”

“Oh, I didn’t know, yours is in our room.”

“So you will have a German Christmas and I an English one,” he smiled.

At the table he put a small gift-wrapped box on it between us. I pulled the curled ends of the ribbon to untie the bow and carefully unsealed the paper to reveal a white velvet covered box, inside was a small but exquisite pendant on a slim chain, the front of it was a beautiful green stone. Without taking it from my palm Dieter flipped a tiny catch at the top of the stone and it dropped forward showing that it was also a locket. Inside the back-plate was inscribed with the words,

“Christmas in Berlin.”

“Emerald is your birthstone yes?” I nodded, for the moment dumbstruck that it was real.

“Dieter it’s beautiful but it must’ve cost a small fortune.”

“It is Christmas, time for extravagance.”

At least the watch I’d raided my piggy-bank to buy for him wouldn’t look amiss next to the pendant and its chain.

“Thank-you, fasten it for me please.” I handed it to him and twisted in my seat for him to do it.

“Fröliche Weinachten!” the sudden cry from the DJ made me jump.

“Fröliche Weinachten mein liebchen.”

“Merry Christmas,” I paused, even my very limited German could understand the term of endearment but I couldn’t help thinking it may simply be a throw-away comment and that he may not want to hear the same from me but I had to find out, “love,” I finished quietly.

“There is something I want you to think about.”

“What?”

“Not soon but eventually perhaps would you let me tell my friends, about you?”

“Can we talk about it after our holiday?”

“Yes, we will.”

At that moment the house lights dimmed and the stage curtain lifted and an amazing looking drag-queen walked into the spotlight. Her act was performed in English and I laughed until my side hurt and my eyes were awash with tears.

We left the club soon after the drag-act finished to walk the short distance back to our hotel, Dieter held my hand all the way to our room. I didn’t let go until after I’d retrieved his gift from my vanity case.

“Jenny this is perfect,” he grinned as he took off the Hugo Boss watch he wore to swap it for the Emporio Armarni one I’d given him.

“Another for your collection but if you already have one I can change it.”

“I don’t, danke schön.”

“Take me to bed.”

“Gladly, why don’t you put on our favourite peignoir and negligee?”

He meant the robe and nightdress combo I’d worn the first night he’d stayed at my place; as a general rule me wearing them, or something similar, was the closest I came to being Cameron in front of Dieter either before we went on a date or after we’d been on one. I had others one of which Dieter had bought for me to keep at his place but this remained our go-to choice.

He was already in bed, with a knowing smile on his face, when I left the bathroom,

“What’ve you been up to?”

“Just something to make you smile I hope,” he tapped the edge of the bed next to him.

I sat down and he stroked my thigh,

“I have something to show you,” he reached for something under his pillow, a single, folded, sheet of A4 paper, “read it,” he held it out to me, still folded.

I could not begin to imagine what he’d given me, part of me was so nervous my hands trembled but then I knew that whatever it was Dieter would never do anything to purposely hurt me so I flicked it out. I thought my eyeballs were going to pop out of my head when I saw the words, it was confirmation of a negative HIV test, dated a week before we left England.

“I want no barrier between us liebchen.”

Before I could say anything there were a few quiet taps on the door,

“Zimmerservice,” a male voice said.

I moved the result sheet so he wouldn’t be able to see the writing but kept my head bowed as if I was reading it.

“Kommen Sie bitte herein.”

“Ihr heißer Schokoladen, Herr,” the young man who entered the room said.

“Vielen dank, hier bitte,” Dieter replied pointing to the bedside table.

He already had a Euro note folded and ready which he laid on the tray the waiter carried as he set down the two drink.

“Güte Nacht, Herr, Fraülein,” he said in farewell.

“Hot chocolate, German hot chocolate, for my Jenny’s first German Christmas.”

“I’m already a convert,” I laughed, reaching for one of them.

Each glass mug was set in a finely worked silver holder, the chocolate within was rich and thick topped with a deep layer of cream dusted, in my own case with, cinnamon sugar.

“I’ll be as round as a bacon pig by the time we leave if I keep indulging in these,” I laughed when I downed the last of the delicious concoction.

“I can think of ways how to work off the calories,” he sniggered.

“Your exercise regime seems to be working so far,” I smirked, patting my flat stomach.

“Lass mich Liebe mit dir machen, Liebling,” he said as he threw the bed covers aside next to him.

I may not have fully understood his words but I could understand his intent.

Dieter kissed me as he stroked all of my body through the smooth fabric of my nightdress for a while until he moved to cage me beneath him, he kissed me again then asked,

“Will you give me the best of gifts? Will you let me do this without a condom?”

“Yes,” I swallowed, “I never have.”

He pushed himself a little way from me,

“Never?”

“Never, I swear.”

Dieter flipped us both over until I was on top of him,

“Your turn to scramble my eggs,” he grinned.

“A lady has to have some secrets,” I smiled.

He reached to retrieve the small bottle of lube from the nightstand drawer and handed it to me. As I’d expected Dieter had been naked beneath the duvet and his cock already rampant. I slid down his body kissing and licking his skin as I moved keeping my body flat rather than kneeling between his legs. He shivered and goosepimples erupted on his thighs when I blew over the end of his of his prick that was already slick with his pre-cum. I was about to pour some of the gel onto my palm to cover the hard flesh but instead I licked from the root of Dieter’s cock to the head, hearing myself moan when I tasted him as I engulfed his cock in my mouth.

I’m not sure which of us enjoyed this more, me giving head or Dieter feeling it, his prick is perfect, well I think it is; it’s smooth, the ridge just deep enough to be worth tonguing and to make itself known when Dieter slid it in and out of my hole, its length enough to feel heavenly in my ass and equally so when I took him into my throat.

Without warning he turned us onto our sides and took gentle hold of my hair, this, this was when I loved oral the most – when he fucked my mouth. I moaned with anticipation and arousal.

“Hands please,” he said with just enough authority for my liking.

I wriggled a little to free my left arm then stretched both over my head; most times Dieter wouldn’t stop me jacking off when we did this – but this wasn’t to be one of them.

“Langsam, slowly,” he murmured using his hold on my hair to demonstrate what he wanted me to do.

I did as he needed and while he didn’t need to keep hold he didn’t let go of my hair.

“Be still, I will do it.”

“Hmm,” I groaned, this was the best part.

I’ll let you into a secret, Dieter is the only man I’ve ever slept with who I know as an absolute fact to have had female lovers. That said whilst I know some women will indulge in anal sex I know many more will not so as I have no desire whatsoever to know the details of how he had sex with women I’ve equally no idea if he’s ever done that with a woman.

So in my head the only thing I’m certain of that I can do to his prick that a woman can do that is so intense is this, to take him in my mouth and use my oral skills to bring him pleasure.

He moved slowly, occasionally holding the head of his cock to the back of my throat – instant extra blast of lust for yours truly – making me whimper with need. Then he began moving faster never quite filling my mouth telling me to suck harder. All of a sudden he thrust his cock fully into my mouth and stopped.

“Time for me to do that to your ass, Liebchen.”

I’d been concentrating on keeping my breathing even and regular but now my breaths shortened, I was trying to imagine how different it might feel to have him empty into me without a condom.

And I wanted it – bad.

He withdrew slowly, moving onto his back he looked at his saliva-slicked cock,

“We may not need this,” he held up the lube.

It certainly looked wet enough so pulled myself up and straddled him, Dieter was holding his cock straight up for me. I wanted to try not using the lube because I had this odd thought that it would make it more intimate without it.

“Just relax my Jenny,” he murmured.

I’d begun panting when the tip pressed against my sphincter so I took a couple of deep, calming breaths and that’s when he rolled his hips up and I felt the head of his dick slide beyond my puckered ring.

“Take it Jenny,” he coaxed, slipping a hand beneath the hem of my nightdress to tease my cock, “my fingers will move only when you do.”

He’d taken hold of my pole between two fingers and a thumb about half-way down,

“Jeez but you’re a tormenting bugger,” I gasped, as I’d lowered myself a little so Dieter had moved his fingers towards the base of my prick.

He carried on moving them down as I, little-by-little, took more of his dick into my ass but I didn’t get it all my own way, Dieter thrust the last inch or two into me.

“Fuck me!” I wailed, as my head fell back.

God alone knows how but the man fucked me hard and fast for what seemed like an ecstatic eternity trouble is the firm grip he’d taken of the base of my cock stopped me from getting off on being fucked.

“Take off your nightdress,” not something he often had me do.

As soon as I’d tossed it aside he tipped us over so that I was beneath him, I wrapped my legs round his waist and grabbed hold of his shoulders.

“Jenny, it will be soon, I cannot wait, I’m sorry.”

My eyes snapped open and I lifted my head from the pillows,

“Just fucking do it, now,” I growled, “or I’ll rip your frigging bollocks off!”

“I love hearing my sweet lady talk such words, it usually means she wants me to do this.”

He hammered my ass so hard I was sure I would be bruised where his thighs were slamming against my behind.

And I didn’t care.

“Oh fuck, I’m gonna cum,” I groaned.

“So am I.”

“Jesus Christ!” I yelled, not caring if any of the other hotel guests heard, when I felt his cock swell and pulse, his jizz actually filling me for the first time.

I looked down to where my cock was trapped between our bodies in time to see the first of my own spunk spurt from it.

“Fucking hell,” I gasped, my whole body jerking beneath Dieter’s.

“Thank-you, I have wanted us to do this for a long time, it was even better than in my head.”

“Merry frigging Christmas,” I giggled.

Eventually his cock softened so much it slid from my body – another thing I’d never experienced.

“Are you okay Jenny?”

“I am so far beyond okay I can’t even see it from here.”

He pushed himself up onto his knees when I’d dropped my legs from round his torso then leaned over the edge of the bed; he held up my discarded nightdress,

“I didn’t think you’d want it to get wet, do you want it?”

“If I do it won’t be until after I’ve been to the bathroom.”

“We’ll go together,” he stood up and offered me his hand to help me do the same.

It was Dieter who used a facecloth, dipped in the warm water he’d run into the sink, to clean me off, as I dried my skin he cleaned himself but it was me who dried his cock and balls.

“If you don’t stop I’ll soon be ready to take you again,” he chuckled when I carried on wiping for some time after he was dry.

“I might not be unwilling, I smirked.

He didn’t take the bait, what he did do was pick up my nightie from where he’d put it at the end of the vanity unit to help me put it back on and smooth it down my body.

“Bedtime,” he smiled.

I remembered this pose, sort of, from my night with Shawn only that time I’d been near enough fully dressed when I’d fallen asleep curled up next to him with his arm around me. Now I was at least in nightwear and although I had Dieter’s arm around me holding me close to his side it was me who was awake and he asleep.

I knew that at some point my adventure with Dieter would come to an end, I was sure to my core that for him, deep down, it would be a woman who would share his future but for now this relationship was working for the both of us.

And I could live with that.

What I didn’t know how to live with was what I’d heard.

“ich graube ich liebe dich, Liebchen,” he’d said quietly in his sleep.

German or English even I could work out the gist of what he’d said.

 

What The Fuck Do I Make Of That?