Choices - 6. Chapter 6

Part III Choices

Chapter 6 The Night Before...

“Are you okay?” I asked nervously, feeling my first ever pangs of jealousy. My heart was pounding away in my chest, the same as if I had just run up and down the stairs a half dozen times. Jesse was the most physically attractive person I knew. He rivaled any kid on TV or in print that I’d ever seen, and certainly stood head and shoulders above anyone in our little town of Santa Corina. I mean--shit--if Jesse was attracted to a sixteen year old stud like Jason, and if Jason was gay and if he was attracted to Jesse, I wouldn’t stand a chance. That was a lot of 'ifs,' but it really made me think how easily I could loose the love of my life, and I was getting scared, right there, standing in my own driveway on a chilly November evening...truly scared that I might lose Jesse.

“I’m fine,” he said quietly, seeming to return to something closer to normal. Then he looked at me in a strangely intense way. Even though there was barely any light in the sky, there was still a sparkle in his eyes. “Can we go up to your room now?” he asked hesitantly. “I really want to just be alone with you.”

It sounded so good to hear those words just then that I practically skipped back into the house, Jesse following close behind. My mom was watching TV in the den--CNN, Jesse’s favorite.

“Everything go smoothly?” she asked.

“Sure, mom,” I replied, suddenly feeling a little guilty about just dashing past her to go up to my room.

“It sure is gratifying to see a nice clean boy like Jason, doing God’s work,” she said with a smile.

“He sure was clean!” Jesse remarked, immediately turning red when he realized what a silly thing he had just said.

I stifled a laugh and let him flounder around for a bit. Served him right for making me jealous.

“I mean...uh...his truck sure was clean! I could see my reflection in it,” he stammered. Quick save!

“That was a very nice truck,” my mom agreed.

“Well, Jesse and I are going upstairs to play video games,” I said, feeling like we had chit chatted long enough.

“Thank you so much for all your hard work, boys,” my mom said. “And remember, we need to be at church by seven tomorrow morning, so please don’t stay up all night doing...well, whatever it is you boys do all night!”

Jesse and I just exchanged stunned looks. Obviously she didn’t mean what it sounded like she meant. But it was still pretty funny. Jesse, of course, couldn’t resist.

“Oh, we won’t do it all night,” he assured her. “And I promise I’ll make Perry go to bed really early!”

“You’re so sweet, Jesse. Do you boys want me to bring you a snack?”

”We’re both stuffed, mom,” I assured her.

“Then I’ll stop by later and say goodnight. Thanks again, boys.”

With that, we were up the stairs and gone!

When we got to my room, I closed the door, but I didn’t want to lock it because my mom might get suspicious. Jesse sat on the edge of my bed and I stood with my back to the door sort of glancing at him uneasily.

“Are you upset, Perry?” Jesse asked with honest concern.

“Why would you ask that?” I answered evasively, still standing across the room from him. I could see that Jesse was wondering why I didn’t go and sit by him. I wasn’t exactly sure what the problem was either, just that I felt like things were a little...wrong.

“Do you think I have the hots for Jason?” he asked, getting right to the heart of the matter, as usual.

At first I shook my head in denial, but I could see that Jesse wasn’t buying it. I shrugged defeatedly. “He is a really great looking guy,” I admitted.

“He sure is,” Jesse concurred--a little too quickly for my taste. But then he smiled. “I can’t believe you’re jealous!” he said with a giggle.

I was getting a little annoyed at the seemingly lighthearted way he was treating my feelings.

“I guess I am,” I admitted, a pout on my face as I leaned against the wall. “But I saw how you looked at him.”

“Perry, for christssakes! Don’t be ridiculous. I mean that guy, Jason--he’s way out of my league! I’m just a little kid to him.”

“He was checking you out--I saw him!” I persisted.

Jesse shrugged. “He was checking you out too. Maybe I’m the one who should be jealous...” He looked at me with those big blue eyes of his, a playful smile on his face.

I felt myself starting to cave, but I wanted Jesse to understand that I really was concerned. “Jesse, there’s no contest. I’m just a plain, skinny, dorky kid and stupid things keep coming out of my mouth before I can even stop them and...and...I can’t even compare myself to you or Jason!” I explained desperately, the words pouring out so fast that my tongue was tripping over them.

The smile slowly disappeared from Jesse’s face. “I’m sorry, Perry. I didn’t mean to make fun of your feelings...” he said guiltily. He laughed dryly in a self deprecating way. “If you just knew me before...before I came here. Things were so different...”

That was an understatement. I knew about his father, who finally got so messed up with drinking and drugs, that he had gotten himself thrown in jail. I knew Jesse had been castigated by his peers because of his emerging sexual identity, and been forced to move from town to town and school to school. I knew that he had experienced, in a way I never could, what it was like to be truly poor.

“It’s okay, Jesse...” I began, already feeling awful for trying to lay a guilt trip on him--especially over nothing.

He slowly shook his head while looking down at his feet. “It’s like, no matter how many sad stories I tell you about my past, no matter how crazy I get, you just keep telling me how much you...love me,” and when he said those words, his voice became very quiet. “It’s just really hard for me to grasp,” he said, shaking his head sadly. “I’m such a moron, Perry. When I say that I don’t deserve you, I honestly mean it.” He hung his head despondently. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate you. I do, I really do. It’s like the reason I came to California was just so I could meet you...”

That did it. I walked over to the bed and knelt in front of Jesse. I looked up into his face, seeing unspilled tears glistening in his eyes. I lifted his bowed head ever so gently and forced him to look at me. “I love you so much, Jesse Taylor. I love everything about you. It would just...kill me if I lost you...”

“To Jason Tarentino?” he sniffled with a mischievous little smile…

“Yeah, Jason or whoever. It’s just that I’ve never been this close to anybody in my life--I don’t think most people even experience something like this when they're still just kids.”

”Yeah, I think we’re pretty crazy too,” Jesse smiled weakly.

A single tear spilled over and ran down his cheek. I caught it with my finger and touched it to my lips. It was warm and salty.

“It’s funny how, when you have such strong feelings for somebody, it just makes you crazy sometimes,” I noted befuddledly.

“I think that’s why you hear about all these terrible divorces people go through,” Jesse said. “When you make that kind of emotional investment in someone else, and then things go sour, you can’t just brush it off. All your feelings are magnified: love, hate, jealousy, greed...”

I laid my head on his knee, just trying to calm myself a little. Physical contact with Jesse had an effect on me that was both soothing and energizing at the same time.

“Did you say you were thirteen--or forty three?” I asked.

“Huh?”

“You’re too wise for a kid our age,” I observed a little sadly.

“I think going through Hell and back would make anyone wise,” Jesse said bitterly, the sardonic grin on his face telling me that he certainly wasn't bragging. “And if you think I’m wise, you should get into it with my mom sometime...”

I took Jesse’s hand in mine and squeezed it tight.

“So I don’t have to worry about you and Jason...?” I asked hopefully.

“Of course not,” Jesse said, squeezing my hand back.

I smiled wickedly. “So what about Derek...?”

“Argh!” Jesse exclaimed in mock frustration. He got down on the floor and began passionately kissing me on my head, my nose, my cheeks, my forehead, and finally my lips...Oh God, it felt so good to be in love with Jesse Taylor!

“I...I think I need a shower,” I said, feeling the heat coming from inside me in a nearly overwhelming wave.

“Are you okay?” he asked again.

I nodded, even though I had this sudden fear that my emotions were going to completely overwhelm me, maybe even make me stop breathing...“More than okay...and it’s going to be a great night, just you and me...”

“And your mom...”

“She’s not invited,” I whispered, kissing him on the forehead.

I got up and slipped my shoes off. It was only as I was pulling my shirt off that I realized I was undressing in front of Jesse! I suddenly felt a little self conscious.

I saw Jesse, just staring at me, and judging by the big grin on his face, he seemed pleased with what he saw.

“Hey, can’t a guy get undressed in his own bedroom?” I complained playfully.

“Was I complaining?” Jesse asked with a sly smile.

“Ah...no--hehehe...but...Hey, you wanna go on the internet?”

“Sure,” he said, going with my flow. “Maybe I can track something down for that science report. The library's a great resource, but you’ve got to admit, there’s been some changes in the world since 1974!”

I got Jesse up and running, and went into the bathroom to finish undressing. After a long day of school, packing boxes, moving furniture, and oh yeah--breaking the record for fastest blow job ever administered in the twelve to fourteen year old age category-- that shower sure felt good! As I shampooed my hair, I remembered the first time Jesse had come over. He had wanted to use the same shampoo that I used! How crazy was that? And yet, it was so precious to me, that I felt myself starting to tear up again. Jesse was right about how the depth of our relationship magnified all our emotions. I mean, I didn’t feel like crying when Morgan sang my praises at lunch, as cool as that was. Then, I began musing about Jesse's past and I found myself trying to imagine why anyone would want to hurt my sweet angel. Because he had certainly been hurt...badly. How insensitive and cruel could people be?

I kept the shower on the cool side, not wanting to get too worked up thinking about the evening ahead. I wanted to save myself for him. We’d have to be a little careful, but it wasn’t like my mom was going to be checking in on us every few minutes. We’d have plenty of time to ourselves...

I couldn’t leave the bathroom without a quick blow dry and comb--I wanted to look nice for Jesse. I used the blow-dryer to evaporate some of the steam that fogged the mirror and looked at myself. I still expected to see the plain, skinny kid with those big stupid eyes staring back at me. At least the freckles had almost completely vanished and I hadn’t yet been hit with any serious acne. But actually, I was surprised to see that I was starting to fill out a bit. My shoulders seemed a little broader than I remembered them being, and there was actually some definition to my chest and abs...Abs? Whoa, that was something new! The realization struck me for the first time that I was changing from a kid to a teen. I might never look like Jason Tarentino, but at least I was developing in the right direction!

I sighed, my thoughts torn between my admiration for Jason, and my envy. Did he know how lucky he was to look like that, to have that charming personality that made people just melt in his presence? That smile, those eyes, those dimples, he must have been born with them. It must be a great ego boost for him to look in the mirror every morning. If he ever set his sights on Jesse, I don’t think I could stand it! Still, I wasn't totally depressed by what I saw in the mirror that night, a few weeks before I turned fourteen. I wrapped a dry towel around my waist, and opened the door.

The Beatles' White Album was playing at low volume. Jesse was hunched over the computer, the bright colors of the webpage he was looking at reflected on his face. He had taken off his shoes, but was otherwise still dressed in his school clothes.

“Oh, hey, Perry,” he said, his eyes still on the screen. “Could I print some of this stuff to take home?”

“Sure, just go to the print icon,” I said, walking over to stand behind him.

“Ummm, you smell good,” he said, and finally turned my way.

His face just changed completely. His sweet little smile melted away and his mouth formed a little ‘o.’ His eyes looked me up and down. Eat your heart out, Jason Tarentino!

He slowly stood up and looked me over one more time, starting with my slightly damp hair, moving down my naked torso, past the towel around my waist, and all the way down to my toes.

“Gees, Perry,” he stuttered, actually blushing, “you look so...”

“Clean?” I finished.

“Extremely,” he said, the smile returning to his face.

He stood facing me. He was maybe an inch shorter than me and he had to look up to me slightly when we were at really close range. He put his hands on my bare shoulders, and than ran them down my chest, over my nipples and down to my belly. Then his arms snaked around my back and he pulled me into him. Instead of the kiss I was expecting, he laid his head on my chest. His silky blond hair tickled, but I could feel his tender cheek against my skin. I felt him sigh. I stroked his hair and neck, and his sock feet touched my bare toes as we pressed our bodies together.

“Ummm, you smell so good...” Jesse repeated.

“You smell like sweat!” I teased.

“Your such a romantic, Perry!” he giggled, backing up and brushing his hair out of his eyes.

I went over to my dresser. I knew my mom would expect me to wear my pajamas with a guest sleeping over, but I really didn’t feel like it. In an act of unthinking boldness, I casually let my towel drop to the floor, knowing full well that Jesse’s eyes were glued to me.

“Sweet Moons Over My-Hammy!” he gasped, referring to the famous (or infamous) Denny’s breakfast sandwich.

I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Cool! Your cheeks jiggle when you laugh, dude!” Jesse remarked.

“Stop already!” I begged, feeling the giggles bubbling up despite my best efforts to keep a straight face. I slipped a clean pair of boxers on as quickly as possible.

Jesse applauded quietly. “The crowd goes wild!” he cried in a subdued voice, making cheering noises. “A perfect ten!”

“Shit, now look what you’ve done!” I groaned, turning to show Jesse the boner tenting my boxers.

“Did I do that?” he asked innocently.

“You are responsible--and I expect you to remedy the situation as soon as possible!”

“That could be a little difficult with your mom in the next room,” Jesse pointed out.

“Actually, I had a plan to deal with that, but now...” I said, shrugging helplessly and gesturing at my unsightly bulge.

“Hmmm, maybe it’ll go away in a little bit,” Jesse said encouragingly.

“Sure, if you put a bag over your head, maybe...”

Jesse blushed and looked down at his feet. “ Anyway,” he said, changing the subject, “ I wanted to ask you, just where am I sleeping tonight?”

“Oh yeah, I almost forgot!” I said. I went to the closet and pulled out the folded futon mattress. “It’s a full size, and it just fits between the bed and the TV," I said, laying it out. I went to the bottom drawer of my dresser and got out the futon cover. It had a simple blue and white stripe pattern, and a zipper that ran around three sides.

“Help me get this on,” I said, and we quickly got the cover on and zipped it up tight. Jesse flopped down on it.

“Awesome!” he said with a big childish grin. “I’ve never slept on a futon before--it’s actually more comfortable than I would’ve thought.”

”You know what the best part is?” I whispered conspiratorially.

“What?”

”It doesn’t have any springs so it hardly makes any noise when you move.” I laid down on my belly and rolled back and forth to demonstrate my point.

“What a dirty little mind you have, Perry Thompson!” he teased. “I’ve obviously been a good influence on you!” We rolled around giggling for a few minutes and then just laid there side by side, listening to the Beatles.

“What if your mom decides to pay us a visit?” Jesse asked.

“Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Listen, why don’t you jump in the shower. I’m going to launch a preemptive strike and go say goodnight to her in her room! I’m even going to tell her that I have to lock the bedroom door!”

“How are you going to explain that?” Jesse asked skeptically.

“Just leave that to me,” I answered cryptically. I got to my feet and slipped on my robe, tying it tightly around my waist to make sure there was no chance of accidental exposure.

“Good luck, Sarge!” Jesse said with a salute as I went out.

“If I’m not back in ten minutes, send in the Marines!” I said, stepping into the hall and turning to give Jesse a little salute.

I padded barefoot down the hall to my mom’s room. The door was partially opened and it was quiet. I peeked in to see her lying on top of her bed in her bathrobe and slippers, her hair wrapped in a towel. She was reading a book and hadn’t heard my silent approach.

“Uh, hey mom,” I said quietly, slowly opening the door all the way. My mom smiled and put her book down.

“Hey, yourself, honeybunch,” she smiled. “How are you boys getting along?”

”Oh, just fine,” I assured her with what I hoped was a reserved smile.

“I’ve never seen you take to someone the way you have to Jesse,” she remarked.

I hoped I wasn’t blushing. I looked down at my feet, just in case. “Yeah, we really hit it off. Jesse is just...awesome.”

“He’s a very sweet boy,” my mom agreed. “And he received top academic honors for the first quarter from what I’ve heard.”

I wondered how she had heard that. I knew he got straight ‘A’s, but I didn’t know he was at the top of the class. I nodded anyway, beaming proudly inside as if Jesse were my brother or something! “Sometimes he seems a lot older than his age,” I remarked.

“That comes from having a very difficult life,” she noted.

I just nodded. If she only knew how much I wanted to take Jesse’s pain away...

You boys did a lovely job this afternoon. Thank you both so much.”

“It was no big deal,” I assured her. “I’m really glad Jesse’s getting the computer. I’m going to show him how to get a free webpage...”

“You kids and your internet!” my mom said, shaking her head with mild exasperation.

“It’s educational!” I said , smiling knowingly, since we had this discussion many times before. “Jesse just found a bunch of stuff for his science report.”

“I know: the internet is the answer to all things,” my mom sighed. Then she looked at me closely for the first time.

“Why, Perry Jacob Thompson, what are you wearing under that robe?” she asked.

This time I could feel the heat on my cheeks as I blushed for sure. “I’m not a little kid any more. I’m not gonna wear striped pajamas to bed!” I said with a surge of defiance.

She continued looking me up and down. “You have grown, haven’t you?” she said softly. I felt a little shiver go down my spine. It was as if my mom was having the same realization I had just had looking in the mirror a few minutes ago. “You aren’t my little Perrypoo anymore,” she pouted, resurrecting a pet name she hadn’t used for several years now (thankfully).

“Mom,” I groaned weakly, suddenly feeling bashful and awkward.

“Come here, baby,” she said, beckoning me to her side.

I wanted to run to her. I was feeling an overwhelming sense of love for my mother and I wanted to run over and take her in my arms. But I was a teenager--I had to act cool, right? I pretended to drag myself over to the bed, and stopped just out of arm’s reach.

“You’re becoming a young man, aren’t you?” she asked, and I felt like she was looking, not at my rapidly growing teenage body, but directly into my soul.

That was all I could take. My resistance was broken. I sat on the edge of the bed next to her and just leaned in. She wrapped her arms tightly around me and pressed my head to her bosom. Soon she was stroking my hair just as I had done for Jesse a few minutes ago. We hadn’t had a moment like this in a long time. Even last June, when I was leaving to spend summer vacation with my dad in New York, our good-byes had been somewhat reserved. Her eyes had been moist with tears, but she hadn’t really said anything beyond the usual, ‘Be good and don’t forget to write.’ I, of course, being a teenager in a public place, had kept my cool, giving her a hug and a quick peck on the cheek before boarding my flight.

Now, I just wanted to express my love for her in the most straight forward way I could, just by being close to her. I could feel her heart beating through her robe and it was soothing. We stayed like that for maybe five or six minutes. It was my mom who actually brought the moment to an end.

“Go to bed,” she said tenderly. “Tomorrow’s going to be a long day. Does French Toast and sausage sound good for breakfast?” she asked. What a mom...

I nodded, slowly pulling myself away. I just stood there looking at her for a minute and she knew what I was feeling. She smiled and put her reading glasses back on. “Don’t stay up all night talking,” she chided me.

“Mom,” I groaned, “we’re not girls, you know!”

She just smiled, and opened her book.

I stopped at the door and turned to look at her once more. “Oh, I almost forgot. I’m going to be locking my door, okay?”

“Whatever for?” my mom asked, putting her book down.

“Well, it’s Jesse. He says he can’t sleep unless the bedroom door is locked.”

My mom gave me a puzzled, slightly skeptical look.

“I think it’s because of his dad...” I said, cringing inwardly at my incredibly tasteless lie.

My mom nodded in understanding. “Poor boy,” she said sympathetically.

I nodded in agreement. “He had it pretty rough before he came to Santa Corina.”

“Thank God, you’ll never really know,” she said protectively. “You’re a very good friend, Perry. I’m very proud of you.”

“Jesse’s cool, mom. There’s nothing for you to be proud of.”

The look she gave me that look that told me that she clearly disagreed, but she didn’t say so out loud. “Goodnight, baby.”

“G’night, mom.”

I closed her door and went back down the hallway. I stopped at the linen closet to get a sheet, pillow, and blanket for the futon. The door to my room was part way open and I could hear the White Album continuing on at a low volume. It was that strange McCartney ballad, Honey Pie. It sounded more like something from the Roaring Twenties than from the Groovy Sixties, but it was catchy. As I stood by the door about to go in, I suddenly heard Jesse singing along with Sir Paul.

“Honey Pie, you are driving me crazy! I’m in love but I’m lazy...” His voice was so pure and delicate, like it had been when he was singing hymns at church a couple weeks ago. There was something so clean and innocent about his voice. I didn’t know how he would have sounded singing along to Helter Skelter, but he had a simple, lucid tone that somehow went along perfectly with his crystal blue eyes. It was a voice that touched my soul.

Quietly, I peered into my room and saw Jesse lying on top of the futon, dressed in a simple white undershirt and grey sweatpants, his arms folded behind his head, his knees bent and his feet bare. That’s when it really hit me like a ton of bricks...Jesse was an angel sent to me by God. I was sure of it now. That voice, that golden blond hair, those eyes...

I stepped quietly into the room, but Jesse sensed my presence immediately and turned to look at me with a sweet smile on his face. But the smile disappeared as fast as it had appeared. He propped himself up on his elbows, staring at me oddly.

“Perry, what’s wrong?” he asked with genuine concern.

At first, I had no idea what he was talking about. Then I felt them--the hot tears streaming down my face, tears of pure joy..."Nothing, my sweet angel,” I whispered, swallowing the big lump that had formed in my throat. “Nothing at all. Everything is just...totally awesome!” I assured him as I felt myself tremble with the overwhelming love I had for this boy.

I stepped fully into the room and closed the door. I wiped the tears from my face with the sleeve of my robe and then made quite a show out of turning the lock on the doorknob. Jesse’s smile returned, although hesitantly.

“You’re sure you’re okay?” he asked again.

“I don’t know why I get all teary eyed when I’m around you,” I said shamefully, sniffling a little bit.

“I know! What's up with that, dude?--and I even took a shower!” he said, playfully sniffing his armpit.

And suddenly I was laughing again. It was like, when I was with Jesse, every emotion was right on the tip of my tongue. I threw the pillow at him and he caught it easily.

I glanced at the alarm clock next to my bed. It was almost nine.

“You wanna play some video games?” I asked.

Jesse shrugged. “Okay, sure!”

I popped in the new Zelda game since Jesse had played it with me once before. We sat on the futon, leaning against the side of the bed. I guess I was so used to the fact that every teenage boy loved playing video games, that it took me a good fifteen minutes to realize that something wasn’t quite right. Jesse’s character kept getting killed. Granted, he never claimed to be a video game expert, but he had caught on incredibly fast the last time we played, and he seemed to be doing much worse this time around.

“Enough?” I asked quietly.

“Oh, I don’t care...whatever, dude,” he said with a slight smile. When he looked at me with those sparkling blue eyes, it always seemed like he was looking right into me. But it wasn’t scary or unnerving. It made me feel warm and full.

“You don’t want to play video games, do you?” I asked.

He shrugged. Was he blushing?

“What do you want to do?” I asked, setting my controller aside and sliding up close to him.

He looked at me, still blushing a bit, a devious little smile spreading across his face.

“I don’t know. There was something I’ve been thinking about since you came over...”

It was hard to believe that it had only been a couple of weeks ago when, spending the day at Jesse’s place, we had truly explored our sexual relationship for the first time. There had been everything from bondage to blow jobs. We had seen each other naked for the first time. It had been fun and thrilling, profoundly beautiful and incredibly exhausting.

“What’s that?” I asked, coyly.

Jesse took the two controllers and put them on the floor. He turned on the small table lamp next to my bed and got up to flick off the ceiling light.

“Door’s locked, right?” he asked.

I nodded. He turned off the TV, and I watched him with anticipation as my eyes got used to the dimmer light.

“Lie down,” he said, gesturing to the futon I was still sitting on. He didn’t say anything about my robe, so I kept it on, though I had loosened the sash around my waist so that I could sit comfortably. I lay on my back, my head resting on the soft pillow, my body sinking a little into the soft cotton mattress, my arms lying at my sides. Knowing Jesse, I had to be prepared for anything from a blow job to a tickling session, but I only felt a little nervous with anticipation.

Jesse padded over to the futon and knelt near my head. He lowered his head to mine and gave me a sweet, tongueless kiss on the lips. “You’re precious to me, Perry,” he whispered in a quivering voice fraught with barely contained emotion.

Then he moved around to the other end of the futon and knelt there. First he started caressing the tops of my bare feet ever so gently. Again, I had no idea what to expect. Was I about to be the recipient of a hearty toe sucking, or the victim of a frenzied foot tickling? I knew for a fact that my feet were very ticklish, and I wasn’t sure how much I could take if Jesse started in with a vengeance. But after he had gently stroked the tops of my feet for a few minutes, I felt his thumbs pressing into the sole of my right foot. At first, I tensed up, prepared for the tickling sensation I would have expected from someone touching me in that sensitive area. But it didn’t really tickle at all, once his thumbs started moving around. In fact it felt...good, really good. Jesse was giving me a foot massage, and there was no question that he knew what he was doing. He seemed to know just where to apply pressure and how to move his thumbs around. He started at the pad of my foot, just below the toes, and worked his way down to my instep. Just shy of turning fourteen, I wasn’t prone to getting sore feet, but the feeling of relaxation that Jesse’s massage gave me was nevertheless as intoxicating as it was soothing. As he switched to my left foot, I felt my whole body relaxing. While I had started to get hard, anticipating all the naughty things Jesse might do to me, I found that I was actually getting soft again--I was so calm and relaxed.

“Ooooooh,” I moaned in pleasure. “That feels so good...Where’d you...”

“Ssssssh!” Jesse chastened me quietly. Every few minutes he would switch from one foot to the other, always starting at the ball and moving down to the heel. I was wishing there was some way for him to massage both feet at once, it felt so soothingly wonderful!

Finally, after a good fifteen minutes, he stopped. He bent to place light kisses on both my big toes before climbing up the futon to lie next to me.

“How was that?” he asked with a gentle smile.

“It felt so good, I’m not even hard!” I giggled.

“Hmmm--I guess that plan backfired!”

“Where’d you learn to do that?” I asked, turning on my side to face him more directly.

“When I was getting deep into the Martial Arts stuff, I took a class on reflexology--do you know what that is?”

“Something to do with stimulating the nerve endings of the body?” I offered unsuredly.

Jesse nodded with an approving smile. “It’s almost the opposite of Karate, where you try to use the sensitive areas of the body to your opponent’s disadvantage. I also took a few classes in Acupuncture...”

“Uh...I think I’ll pass on that,” I said nervously.

“So, you think Jessica Bainbridge could beat that?” Jesse asked.

I shook my head. “No fucking way,” I assured him. Then I leaned in and gave him a kiss. I was so relaxed just then, that I felt like I could just lay there and snuggle and kiss my boyfriend for the next hour without getting overly worked up. Jesse on the other hand...

I felt something both familiar and hard press against my robed body.

“You’re poking me with your Tootsie Roll,” I remarked.

“Sorry,” he said, and it looked like he was blushing in the dim light from my nightstand above us.

“That’s okay--I love your Tootsie Roll,” I assured him, placing my hand there and rubbing his crotch through his sweatpants. “It’s so... freakin’... delicious!”

“Ummm...” Jesse crooned sexily. “We’re going to make a mess on your futon,” he warned me.

Actually, I had thought about that this morning (sick little me), and I sluggishly got up to walk to the bathroom. It felt strange at first, like my feet weren’t attached to my body. But by the time I returned with a small stack of hand towels, the sensation was gone and my wonderfully massaged feet were just my plain old size nines once again. Jesse was kneeling, a look of anticipation on his angelic face. The long bangs of his silky golden blond hair framed his expression like a work of art.

“Where were we?” I asked, kneeling next to Jesse on the futon.

“You were just taking off this robe...” he said, tugging on the sash and slipping the robe off my shoulders. Once it had fallen away, it was my turn.

“And you were just taking off this shirt...” I said, helping Jesse lift the plain white T- shirt off over his head. I brushed his long golden locks back in place. His hair was still slightly damp from his shower.

I put my hands on his shoulders and pulled him towards me. The kiss started with the lightest pressure possible, only our lips touching together, but soon the pressure began to increase and Jesse’s tongue was searching for a way in. I tilted my head slightly and opened up to him. While we continued our frenching, I found the tops of Jesse’s sweatpants and began tugging them down his hips, getting them down as far as his knees. I ran my hands over his spongy cheeks and found myself instantly becoming hard. There was something just plain magical about Jesse’s ass. My hands ran up and down his back, always coming back to those tender mounds of boyflesh. Those smooth and fleshy cheeks contrasted so perfectly with the rest of his firm and lean body.

I got behind him, both of us still on our knees. My erection pressed into his back as my hands reached around his middle to encircle his hardened shaft. That feeling of running my hand up and down his erect penis, feeling the hardness inside the thinly stretched skin, feeling the smooth head, already moist with precum, and the harder ridge around it, was immensely satisfying.

Soon, Jesse began to thrust his hips forward, causing his rock hard dick to rub harder and harder through my lightly clenched fist. I kissed the back of his neck and shoulders, getting high on the freshly shampooed smell of his golden blond hair. My mom was less than ten yards away in the next room, but right now, there was nobody in my world except for Jesse, and that world of two was plenty for me. It was a universe unto ourselves, with no one there to judge or inhibit us.

Somehow, Jesse had the sense to place a towel down at his knees.

“Re....member...the..futon...!” he groaned triumphantly as thick hot cum squirted from his boyhood, most of it shooting out on to the towel below, but some of it dribbling on my hand because I refused to let go. Jesse made these precious little whimpering sounds as each orgasmic convulsion coursed through his body. I waited until his spasms had completely subsided before I released his softening organ from my grip. I used the same towel to wipe my hand more or less clean, still harboring the unreleased passion of my own burning groin.

Jesse, weakened from his orgasm, still turned to tend to my needs.

I shook my head. “Lie down,” I whispered. He seemed reluctant, but I nodded firmly.

He nodded back, his face glistening with perspiration. He lay down on his back, his sweatpants still bunched up around his ankles.

“Turn over,” I instructed him, moving to kneel along side his naked body.

Unquestioningly, he rolled onto his belly, the soft light of the nightstand lamp highlighting the rounded mounds of his ass, his crack a dark and mysterious crevice between the two pale, perfectly curved cheeks of flesh. Once he was in position, I peeled my own boxers off, and climbed on top of him, straddling him with my knees pressing against the hardness of his thighs. I leaned forward, allowing my erection to press against the small of his back. I felt Jesse stiffen as my dick brushed his cheeks. He folded his arms and rested his head on top of them, leaving himself completely vulnerable.

I was already fully aroused and knew that I was close to climaxing, but I teased Jesse by sliding my stiffened organ up and down along his butt crack. Even though it had been something I could have never imagined doing just a few weeks ago, for a moment, I felt the urge to find Jesse’s opening and thrust myself in, wanting to feel his pucker close around my boyhood, my penis sliding through his moist insides...But it wasn’t going to happen tonight. The feeling passed despite the urgency I felt for orgasmic relief. Besides, I wouldn’t even attempt to do something so forceful, without making sure Jesse was okay with it first. Instead, I lay myself down on Jesse’s back, feeling his shoulder blades pressed against my chest, my stomach molding to the dip in the small of his back. My fully engorged penis lay nestled between Jesse’s spongy ass cheeks.

Feeling the pressure building inside, my knees pressed into Jesse’s thighs and I grabbed the futon cover in my hands, nearly ripping it, as I felt myself succumbing to my need for release. My semen ended up squirting between us, onto Jesse’s back and onto my belly. My body stiffened with every squirt of boyjuice, but I didn’t thrust, or grind into him. I was already there and I just had to let my orgasm take care of itself.

I just lay there, my chin resting on Jesse's shoulder, my penis still nestled in his butt crack, slowly losing its rigidity. My legs hugged his legs, my feet pressed against his feet. I felt like I could just lay there all night, with Jesse as my warm, albeit slightly lumpy, bed...

“You’re getting really heavy,” Jesse giggled, his body shaking slightly underneath me with each little chuckle.

“I thought we could stay like this all night,” I whispered into his ear.

“If you don’t get off soon, we’ll be glued together!” he warned me teasingly.

Reluctantly, I rolled off, the giving softness of the futon mattress a poor substitute for Jesse’s warm and slender frame. I was starting to feel drowsy, but I managed to find a clean hand towel next to the futon, and first wiped Jesse’s back off before cleaning myself up.

“Just think of all those tiny little sperm we’re killing every time we have sex!” I said in wonderment.

‘Yeah, I guess you could say we're mass murders--death by ejaculation!” Jesse joked.

“If they send me to the electric chair, I want you sitting in my lap...wiggling your cute little ass on my...”

“Your Tootsie Roll!” Jesse finished. We snickered a while about all the dirty, silly things we had said. After all, we were just kids, barely into our teens. It wasn’t all tears and angst.

Still naked, I got up and spread the sheet and blanket over the futon. Jesse sat curled up on one end, his sweatpants still strangely bunched up around his ankles.

“You are going to sleep with me, aren’t you?” he asked, and his question was so sincere and his need so clear, that I felt my heart melt a little.

“Of course--as long as you take off those pants...”

Jesse slipped the sweats off and tossed them on the floor with my discarded boxers and his T-shirt.

I pulled my pillow off my bed and set it next to Jesse’s.

“If you get cold during the night, you can always pull the comforter off the bed,” I suggested, slipping under the cool clean sheet.

Jesse snuggled his naked body up against mine. “I don’t think that will be necessary,” he whispered, lightly kissing my ear lobe.

“I love you, Jesse,” I whispered, feeling sleep starting to overtake me.

“I know, Perry...I love you too...”

I woke up slightly disoriented. It was pitch black outside, not a spot of light coming through the blinds. First I realized I was lying on the futon, and then everything came flooding back. I could sense, more than see, Jesse lying next to me, and by his breathing, I could tell he was awake. I glanced at the clock to discover that it was nearly two in the morning. I had probably nodded off around ten, after an incredibly passionate evening of sex with my sweet angel.

“You’re awake?” he whispered.

“Yeah, just now...” I murmured. I started to push my naked body up against Jesse, but he pulled away.

“I have to take leak!” he admitted, “but I didn’t want to wake you up.”

“Hurry back,” I pleaded, the realization of having Jesse with me in bed for the rest of the night, quickly dissipating my grogginess.

Jesse slipped the covers back and padded quickly through the darkness.

“You need some light?” I whispered loudly.

“I’m fine,” Jesse assured me, already reaching the bathroom. He went inside and closed the door before turning on the light.

After an expectant pause, I heard Jesse’s stream hit the water. I knew he was naked and I found myself trying to visualize what he must look like, standing there in all his natural glory. Did he hold his penis with one hand or two? Did he ever have to pee when he had an erection? That was always a problem, trying to get your rock hard cock properly directed at the toilet bowel. Now I had a vision in my head of Jesse standing there naked with an erection, forcing his stream down into the toilet, and it seemed very arousing somehow.

I had never thought of bathroom functions as being erotic before, although I had seen stuff like that on the internet--hehehe...But everything was so new to me. Blow jobs, once a term bandied about by virgin preteens trying to sound cool, or discussed non-erotically in political scandals, were now very real to me. But to tell you the truth, the only penis I wanted to put in my mouth was Jesse’s. The thought of taking someone else’s organ into me like that had no real appeal to me. And then there was tonight. I had the sudden urge to mount Jesse from behind, and for a brief moment, had been tempted to penetrate him--the ultimate act of boy to boy sex! That had never intrigued me before, and even as I had very quickly found myself sexually attracted to Jesse, I had no desire to sodomize him. Now I at least had an idea what that might feel like, and again, with Jesse in mind, it didn’t seem nearly as disgusting as I had previously thought.

I heard the toilet flush and the sound of water splashing in the sink as he washed his hands. He considerately turned out the light before opening the door back into the bedroom.

He silently glided back to my side, slipping back under the covers. I snuggled up against him and his skin felt cool from his little sojourn.

“Yipes!” I cried, as I felt his ice cold feet.

“Hehehe--sorry,” he apologized.

“No problem,” I said, wrapping my arms around him.

“So you’re not too sleepy, either?” he asked.

“Actually, I got all hard just listening to you take a piss!” I told him truthfully.

“Yuck!” he said, nibbling my nose.

We just lay there in the silent darkness, our naked bodies pressed together for warmth, my front to his back, my arms wrapped around his smooth shoulders, the smell of his freshly shampooed hair filling my nostrils.

“Are you thinking about something?” I asked.

“Yeah, how cute you must look taking a dump!” he teased sarcastically.

“Okay, okay, so there are some things better left unsaid, sorry...”

“Hehehe,” Jesse giggled quietly.

“What?”

“I’m just picturing your face, all scrunched up, trying to squeeze out a big one....”

“Knock it off!” I insisted, holding him tighter.

I felt his body quiver with more silent giggles.

“Is that a Tootsie Roll in my butt crack, or are you just glad to see me?” he whispered, repeating his perverted little verse from our All Saint’s Day frolics.

I was silent for a moment, thinking about what I had just said about how some things were better left unsaid. Still...

“You know, Jesse,” I said in a serious tone.

“Hmmmm...?” he purred, wiggling his butt just a little against my stiffening cock.

“Did you like that...tonight?” I asked hesitantly.

“Like what?”

“What we did...”

“You’re going to have to be more specific, dude...”

“I mean, when I got on top of you and...”

“Ohhhh,” he said, and there was a pause. “That was awesome, Perry. Really awesome,” he said quietly, his voice quivering a little.

“Did you want me to...?” I asked, afraid to even put the thought into actual tangible words.

“To go inside?” he finished my thought as always.

I only nodded, but he could feel my movement against his neck. There was a moment’s silence, and then Jesse turned to face me. My eyes were finally adjusting enough to the darkness that I could make out Jesse’s hair and his ever sparkling eyes as he faced me. He gently brushed my cheek with his fingers.

“If the time ever comes that you really want to do that,” Jesse said, “I’ll welcome you...with open butt cheeks!” he giggled despite the serious moment.

I was relieved that Jesse wasn’t too concerned about it. It was something I had thought about a lot, and even tried to discuss with him the first time he had come over. I had been truly scared then. But the closer and more intimate I got with him, the more I thought about doing it...someday.

“Would I be your first?” I asked, trying to sound facetious, but also realizing that I couldn’t fool Jesse that easily.

“Of course,” he answered seriously, stroking my hair and cheek lovingly. “I would never want it to be anyone else but you.”

I felt my heart melt completely, knowing that he meant every word of what he said. I pulled him even closer to me, and buried my face in the smooth indentation between his neck and shoulder, feeling his pulse through his artery.

“Jesse...?”

“Yeah?” he answered softly.

“What are we going to do about Tom and Derek?”

I felt Jesse’s shoulders rise anf then heard him sigh. “And to think, one of the things that attracted me to you was your kind heart...”

“I’m sorry--I’m being a nag--I just wish they could have what we have.”

“Well, I guess I could talk to Derek...” Jesse mused, laying back and folding his arms thoughtfully under his head.

“How? When?” I asked, hoping that Jesse had a plan.

Gees, two questions at once--you really are concerned,” he murmured. “Well, let’s assume he likes boys...”

“And that he has a crush on you...” I reminded him.

“I don’t know if it’s a physical crush or some kind of misguided hero worship,” Jesse mused seriously.

I nodded, but was convinced that Jesse’s suppositions were correct. Not only did Jesse have an uncanny knack for reading other people--including me--but all the things I had seen and heard so far seemed to confirm his conclusions.

“Well,” Jesse said thoughtfully, “when I was a little younger than Derek, I thought the best thing in the whole world would be to kiss another boy.”

It hurt me to think how much Jesse suffered back in Illinois, when all he wanted was a little love. How could anyone have denied him?

“So, maybe I could trick him into coming over here, by promising him a kiss,” Jesse suggested.

“Yeah,” I whispered excitedly. “We could tell my mom we’re all working on some project together, and she can drop us off here!”

“Right, and then we’ll take him to the garage...”

“Really, the garage...?”

“Sure, for extra privacy,” Jesse explained.

“And I’ll wait in the house, I guess.”

“No, you can be there too. I’ll tell him he can get a kiss from both of us if he cooperates.”

”Cooperates with what?” I asked innocently.

“Well, I was thinking we’d make him work for it a little...”

“Work for it?” I asked, starting to get confused.

“Yeah, I think first, he’d have to undergo a little inspection...”

“You’re kidding, right?” I asked. I didn’t like the idea of the two of us somehow intimidating poor little Derek into giving up Jesse and going after Tom, but I waited to hear more.

“Dead serious, dude. I’ll tell him he has to be worthy of our affection...”

”I don’t think he has a crush on me,” I reminded him.

“Believe me, Perry. Everybody has a crush on you!” Jesse kissed my cheek and ear lobe.

“Well, if you say so...” Holy shit! What a mess--Derek having a crush on Jesse and me, Jesse and I being lovers, Tom having given up his crush on me to pursue Derek...My head was beginning to spin.

“So, we were getting to the inspection," Jesse reminded me. "He definitely needs to take off his shirt--we gotta see that smooth little Martial Arts bod of his,” he explained, as if he had everything figured out. “And--and you’d want him to take off his shoes, right?” he asked, turning to me in the darkness.

“Oh, I don’t know...” I pondered seriously.

“C’mon, don’t tell me you don’t want to check out Derek’s feet!”

I was blushing in the dark. Where was Jesse going with all this? “Whatever it takes to work things out,” I answered weakly.

“That’s the spirit!” Jesse said cheerfully. “So then, I guess we might as well have him take off his pants, too!”

“Jesse, what the...” That’s when it finally seeped through my incredibly thick skull--Jesse was stringing me along! ‘Ohhhhhh, I see...” I said out loud, probably sounding like a total idiot. Give me a break--it was two in the morning, for cryin' out loud!

“Yeah, Derek definitely needs to take off those pants,” I agreed enthusiastically.

“There you go!” Jesse nodded, seeing that I was finally catching on to his silliness.

“And maybe he’s wearing tighty whiteys!” I added enthusiastically.

”Huh?” Jesse asked.

“You know--briefs...” I explained. “That’s what we used to call them when I was little.”

“Hmmm....must be a West Coast thing,” Jesse speculated. “So then,” he said, his tone getting more excited now, “we get out one of those nifty folding tables...”

Ahhh, now I could see where this was going...I felt myself getting excited by Jesse’s little fantasy.

“And he has to lie down on the table for the last part of the inspection!” I suggested.

“Excellent, dear boy--great minds think alike!”

“And he is wearing his tighty whiteys--and white socks!” I added.

“Oh yeah, those little white socks,” Jesse rolled the words around in his mouth. “That’s when you pull out the silky white rope, already conveniently cut into four perfectly measured lengths.”

“Won’t he freak out when he realizes he’s going to be tied up?” I asked, as if Jesse were the ancient storyteller and I was the little kid sitting at his knee, my eyes filled with wonder.

“What do you mean? Can’t you see that big ol’ pole tenting his briefs?” Jesse pointed out.

“Oh, yeah, he’s getting pretty worked up, I guess.”

“You bet he is! Having to strip in front of two older--and incredibly cute--boys, and now, just the thought of getting tied up, helplessly waiting to experience his first true boy to boy kiss...maybe hoping for a little tongue from you...”

“From me?” I protested, nudging him playfully in his exposed armpit.

“You taste much better than I do,” Jesse assured me matter of factly.

“So what happens when he’s all tied up?” I asked, finding myself getting just as worked up as Derek in the story.

“Well, first of all, we tie his wrists to the top corners of the table, good and tight, of course. Then, one of us will have to take off Derek’s little white socks...”

“Oh, let it be me!” I whispered excitedly.

“Well, I guess...” Jesse conceded reluctantly. “So when his ten little toes are finally exposed, his feet need to be ever so tightly tied to the other corners of the table, so that his hot little bod is stretched out all helpless and exposed...”

I was actually grinding my hard cock into Jesse’s spongy cheeks now, hungrily waiting for the story to proceed.

“Hang in there, pardner,” Jesse chided me, “we’re almost there...”

“What’s next?”

“At that point, I think we need to split up. You’ll need to somehow force yourself to tickle Derek’s feet, maybe with a feather or something...and I’ll be working his armpits and ribs a little--not too much so that he’s flopping around like a fish out of water...Just enough to get him nice and worked up.”

”I might need to lick his toes a little,” I admitted sheepishly.

“Yeah, you do that,” Jesse agreed dreamily, equally caught up in his own little yarn.

“So what happens then?” I asked anxiously.

“When he’s really worked up and starting to think about maybe getting some much needed relief...that’s when I grab his hard cock out of his tighty whiteys and start teasing it...”

”You mean, like this?” I asked, reaching over to gently stroke Jesse’s stiffening penis under the covers.

Jesse sighed contentedly. “Oh yeah, just like that...” he crooned.

I continued stroking him, my fingers forming a loose fist that glided from the base of his shaft up to the sensitive ridge of skin around his smooth exposed head.

“Yeah, and maybe I’d start speeding up...” he whispered urgently, his breathing becoming heavier as I responded to his suggestions.

“And his nipples might need some attention,” I added, pulling the covers down far enough to plant soft, sucking kisses on Jesse’s stiffening little boytits. He began breathing heavier as all my attention started to bring him closer...

“Yeah, definitely...” Jesse moaned.

“And then...?” I asked, continuing my full, vigorous strokes while laying my head lazily on his bare chest.

“And then, just when he thinks he’s going to get some relief, just when he’s right on the edge of the most tremendous orgasm in his entire life...I grab that cute little stiffy of his and squeeze it tight, keeping his boyjuices locked inside...”

I tried to do as he described, although I was afraid of hurting him. Still using the same hand I had been stroking him with, I tightened my grip until my fingers were curled around to the bottom of my palm, Jesse’s hardness clamped tightly in my fist.

“Ummm....yeah...really...tight...” he gasped, obviously nearing his climax. He began squirming on the futon, his butt lifting off the mattress as the sexual tension in his body built to a fever pitch.

“And I won’t let go...” Jesse whispered urgently, “until he promises to forget about me and go after Tom...”

I continued my iron grip on his cock, occasionally giving it an extra hard squeeze, trying to maintain my hold while Jesse’s hips gyrated around.

“Tell me you love Tom!” he groaned, still pretending he was talking to Derek. “Tell me...!”

Still holding on for dear life, I leaned over and whispered in his ear: “I love you...Jesse...always and forever...only you...”

And that’s when I felt his hot juice forcing it’s way out, despite my firm grip. His body shook with orgasmic spasms and I pumped him a little even though he didn’t seem to be having any problem at all shooting his load.

“Uhnnnnnnn!” Jesse moaned, his brow furrowed and his lips clamped tight as his hips rose in the air one last time. He flopped back on the futon, breathing heavily and completely spent.

I fumbled in the dark for one of the hand towels, grabbing the first one to come into reach. I didn’t know if it was clean or dirty, but I guessed it didn’t really matter at this point. I wiped my hand clean and pushed the covers far enough back to take care of any residual mess around Jesse’s private parts.

I was still rock hard and instinctively wrapped the soiled towel around my shaft and began stroking myself, the fabric of the terry cloth towel causing a stimulating friction that quickly brought me to a much needed climax. At least this one didn’t leave any mess to clean up!

I folded the little towel up and tossed it aside. Jesse was still breathing heavily and I couldn’t tell if his eyes were open or closed in the darkness.

“Are you okay?” I asked gently, stretching myself out along side my naked angel one more time.

“I think...” he whispered dryly between heavy breaths, “...I’m going to need...a semen transfusion...”

“I’m afraid I just spilled the last batch of P-Positive!” I giggled apologetically.

“Shit...what a way to go...” he mumbled, “...semenless.... He was nearly asleep now. "Abandon ship, Perry...abandon ship...” he whispered drowsily.

“Never,” I assured him, snuggling up close and pulling the covers back up over us...”Never...”

 

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comments and constructive criticism are always welcome: underthehoodster@netscape.net