Damnit! What's up with the education system today? They obviously have failed to properly educate those rats, and, as a consequence, the rats are doing things that no self-respecting, educated Desert Pack Rat would ever do....

I'm afraid it's a manifest failure, Graeme... Tarantula spiders are native to Arizona, but all the book say that they live at altitudes under 6000 feet. However, I live at 7000 feet, and during may, when they are on the move, I often get several on my front porch; sometimes big ones, about 5 inches. I've tried explaining to them that they don't live at such high altitudes, by they just don't listen... Another failure of the education system, i suspect.

Oh how sweet! Rats coming to meet their goat fellow! Do take good care of them!

Ieshwar

Speaking of education, at a wild animal park once, my family was informed that there were no remaining Mountain Lions in California except those in captivity. Intrigued, my mother asked the idiot who'd said this what crack he'd been smoking, since there was currently a small pride living a bit north of our house that seemed fond of the long grass next store. Actually, knowing my mom, she was a bit more polite about it, but that was the version I got. Anyways, the trained expert shook his head, sadly I'm told, and told my mother she was mistaken. "Oh, so its been the other tawny-colored six-foot long mountain cat leaving paw prints shaped like the letter 'M' all over my driveway," she said. With a roll of her eyes, she left.

My sister, who worked at the park and had taken the day off to join my mom and the grandkids, said that my mom had said all of this in front of a small crowd, which included the guys supervisor. We think he was told to brush up on his endangered species statistics before the next presentation, but that's only a guess.

Oh, and aside from your house troubles, I'm happy you are getting so much rainfall. It's dry here in LA, and your gain will eventually be our Aquafina.

Mmmh... I'd bet animals education in Arizona is government-run, that's why it doesn't work. Of course, you can hire my services as a private (hence efficient, but expensive) consultant, so I come in and audit the situation, assess that rodents and arachnids could be taught to act properly, and set up some animals-education curriculum that could rid you of such problems. Of course, it will be costlier than the old state/ Bolshevik-type inefficient program, but I have to pay for the rental of the 4-wheel drive to come and audit, don't I?

Tarantulas? *shudders and runs screaming*

While your there, Bondwriter, please instruct the occupant that goats don't live in houses.

Mmmh... I'd bet animals education in Arizona is government-run, that's why it doesn't work. Of course, you can hire my services as a private (hence efficient, but expensive) consultant, so I come in and audit the situation, assess that rodents and arachnids could be taught to act properly, and set up some animals-education curriculum that could rid you of such problems. Of course, it will be costlier than the old state/ Bolshevik-type inefficient program, but I have to pay for the rental of the 4-wheel drive to come and audit, don't I?

Yes indeed; I do blame the government.. they are, after all, the first thing I think of when I think of rats.

Tarantulas? *shudders and runs screaming*

They're only four to five inches long... I take it they might not be well received as a Christmas gift?

While your there, Bondwriter, please instruct the occupant that goats don't live in houses.

And, um, Conner, what might you live in?

And, um, Conner, what might you live in?

I'll get back to you on that. I'm presently in transition and have no fixed pen.

Conner