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Sigh


Tiger

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Conflicted... yes that would be the word. For so many years, I lived in the KC area (with a short interlude in SEMO). Now I'm in Texas. I like it here, but sometimes I miss home. It's like there's a small void there. I don't regret leaving. I feel a lot happier here most of the time. But I see myself wondering what the future will bring. Will I end up staying in Texas? I don't really know. It's like there's still something missing in my life, a void that has been eating at me for a long time. I just know that once that gap is filled, I can truly be happy and not have to worry about the proverbial shoe to drop.

 

In other news, I'm still not getting the work hours I really want. I need full time, because I really want to save up money for my own place. But when I get to that point, where do I want to go? I don't really know. I could stay here in this town, the largest I've ever lived in other than Kansas City. I do like the hustle and bustle of a city, but there's a part of me that will always be a country boy, and there are so many places to explore. There's also the thought of moving closer to the ocean. Houston is a beautiful city... so close yet so far from me now. It's been 7 years since I was there, and I was not there for long, but it's definitely a nice city.

 

The weather here is definitely going to be an adjustment. Normally I am more used to it being anywhere from the 40's to the lower 60's this time of year, but it's not at all unusual for temperatures here to reach the upper 80's or lower 90's here, and where I was before, that didn't happen until late May or early June. It really does make a lot of difference. It's also bone dry here. It seems like it rarely rains here. There have even been some fires. It's unbelievable to me. Of course, it would always start to rain in March where I was before, and the occurrence of snow and winter rain was often enough that there was no mistake that a severe or moderate drought was out of the question during the winter and spring months. Even with February technically being the driest month there, wild fires were unlikely at best.

 

A few news stories also struck me as of late. The first was a woman whose daughter was apparently murdered by her former girlfriend. That's just sad. Then there was news about a man who was severely assaulted in Dallas. Apparently, it was a hate crime as he happens to be gay. So even in a major city that is increasingly progressive, there is still a great deal of danger. The third is about this evil man who's been raping young girls between 12 and 14 years old. In two cases, he entered an apartment that was unlocked. In the third, he had a key. That's just awful. Why are there so many evil people in this world?

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