Confidence

[GaryKelly]

After reading responses to pessimism vs optimism, I figured the next topic should be ego vs self-doubt. Or is the latter humility? I don't think so...one can be clever and humble at the same time but where does confidence fit into the equation? In my case, I learned to dismiss criticism in terms of its potential to undermine my confidence, and also learned to accept praise with a grain of salt. So there's a balance; a happy medium. Am I good at what I do? Yes, I am. Have I stopped learning? No, I haven't. But, ya know, stepping into the ring with Ruslan Chagaev requires a certain amount of courage and confidence. So, dear Breth, where does confidence end and ego begin?

[eliotmoore]

Too hard to say. How to put this... confidence is your belief in your own power to act effectively or it might be your reasonable conviction in the rightness of your beliefs. Ego steps in when you maintain a course of action or hold to a belief after the point where reasonable conviction has or should fail. The ego refuses to admit its position is not tenable for fear of loss of face.

 

Egotists have an inflated idea of their own importance. Their actions shore up this belief in themselves and try to promote it with others. I tend to see confidence as more externally goal-oriented. Ego is of course inner directed. The operative question might be "whose interests are being served here?"

 

Unfortunately the line is very subjective.

[MMandM]

I would say a weak person either lacks self-confidence or is dominated by the "emotion" of fear of others and situations. An emotional person is one who demonstrably lets emotions take precedence over restraint or intellect, especially in situations of joy or sadness. It takes discipline and self-determination to overcome one's weak character traits, and being emotional is an easy way out, especially when used as a tool.

Edited June 11, 2007 by Mark_Marciano

[AFriendlyFace]

Too hard to say. How to put this... confidence is your belief in your own power to act effectively or it might be your reasonable conviction in the rightness of your beliefs. Ego steps in when you maintain a course of action or hold to a belief after the point where reasonable conviction has or should fail. The ego refuses to admit its position is not tenable for fear of loss of face.

 

Egotists have an inflated idea of their own importance. Their actions shore up this belief in themselves and try to promote it with others. I tend to see confidence as more externally goal-oriented. Ego is of course inner directed. The operative question might be "whose interests are being served here?"

 

Unfortunately the line is very subjective.

This is all excellent! It's probably not how'd I'd have put it, but I completely agree

 

I would say a weak person either lacks self-confidence or is dominated by the "emotion" of fear of others and situations.

I suppose I'd agree with that.

An emotional person is one who demonstrably lets emotions take precedence over restraint or intellect

Hmm, this I'd disagree with. I suppose we have a different connotation for the word emotional. I seldom if ever reduce my thinking to pure black and white; however, as a general statement I'd say it's good to be emotional and bad to be unemotional. Of course by emotional I mean that it's good, proper, and healthy to express the emotions you're feeling in an acceptable, constructive way. I consider myself an emotional person, but I certainly don't think it takes precedence over my intellect.

especially in situations of joy or sadness.

Hmm, personally I can imagine very few circumstances in which expressing your honest, heart-felt joy would be a bad thing or inappropriate. In fact the only scenario I could imagine is if your joy somehow made others feel worse. For example if I were at a funeral and recieved very good news, or if something really good had happened at work while a coworker was struggling/having a bad day. If your joy will make others feel worse about their plight, then yes it should be somewhat restrained. Even there though I'd actually think at least 50% of the responsibility would fall on the other person/people's shoulders to realize that despite their own bad circumstance they should still be happy for others (I just think that under most circumstances it isn't really reasonable to assume that they'll feel and understand this so for the sake of tact one should control themselves).

 

As for sadness...hmmm, too complicated. One should definitely express their sadness in an honest, open way. They should not take it out on others or otherwise use it manipulatively however. In general I think sadness is much more complicated than joy so I'll refrain from making any other generalized statements.

It takes discipline and self-determination to overcome one's weak character traits, and being emotional is an easy way out, especially when used as a tool.

Once again I think we have a slightly different definition for the word "emotional". I agree that if something bad happens one should take action to resolve the problem instead of just sitting there crying; however, I see nothing wrong with having a cry and then fixing the problem. Recently I had a very stressful, series of unfortunate events occur. After I'd properly whinned, and accepted emotional support, I pulled myself together and took the steps I needed to take to fix the situation. I think it's perfectly fine to express your sadness, disappointment, or frustation, but there comes a time when you have to stop and take actions to make your sitation better. Beyond that the emotional behaviour is counterproductive.

[Lugh]

confidence enables a person to accomplish things.

ego causes them to brag about those accomplishments.

the confidence does not end where the ego begins, however other people may not see it that way.

[Adonelos]

confidence,ego vs self doubt

 

I guess....

 

confidence= believing in your own ability

 

At what point does confidence come into play? You might find it interesting that I believe it happens alot. Writer's post their stories because they are confident about them right? Same could be true when you approach and talk to someone. Your confident that you can hold their attention for a bit. You believe in yourself and that shows in what you do no matter where you do it.

 

ego= the part of consciousness that deals with external reality

 

I actually had to look this on up and it's supposed to be some sort of mediator between your Id and the Super-ego.... essentially i'm lost.

 

vs. Self-doubt

 

This I have alot of, the cancer of confidence, self doubt. It makes you think about things you've already done or planned on doing in the worst possible light. You might say pessimists are doubters as doubt, at least to me, looks at the worst possible things that could happen. Eventually, if allowed to long it could eat away at a healthy confidence leaving you to be one of those wispy people scared of their own shadow and afraid to the point of death of talking with another person...

 

possibly useless rambling post....