zakynthos
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Chapter Thirteen - Cannabis.
zakynthos commented on William King's story chapter in Chapter Thirteen - Cannabis.
Things didn't iurn out too bad for them considering being homeless on the streets anywhere - underage and all of it making them pretty vulnerable to the nastier elements of the world It seems like a surreal xerene vacation from their troubles but it feels like the calm before the storm -
Still wondering what became of Hank and what happened to his truck/car left in the hollow. enquiring minds want to know ๐
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Chapter Eight - The North
zakynthos commented on William King's story chapter in Chapter Eight - The North
I truly love your optimism - glad you're willing to share as I am in dire need of some. From my perspective - what I see is 2 trains in opposing directions running full speed one one track. Classic impending trainwreck. Makes me want to call out and yell - STOP! Totally useless - speeding trains never listen ๐ฑ -
Thats a really valid point My comment was referring to Alex's parents attitude but you are right - that knowledge would be an understandable response for cutting off Mattys friendship with Alex if Matty had gone full monty disclosure. Seems though - that if Mattys parents knew all the gritty details - they would likely have not kept Alex's dad in the dark. Guess we'll find out eventually
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My imagination has been running amok about this ambush (sorry in advance - if this is getting too annoying ) Here is my possible improbable to add to the list - Just for fun I am imagining the evil little Tarquin (age 7) was involved in the ambush. After all, he was in a tower window staring down ominously at Andrew when Andrew drove off. Maybe the ambush road that Andrew turned onto was visible from the window in the tower and it was Tarquin who made an unauthorized call to notify Denton. This fits in with Topher's comment (a few chapters prior) mentioning that Tarquin (age 7) was punished to 3 days in the dog kennels for some yet to be disclosed offenses by his doting father. Perhaps Tarquin unwittingly being involved in getting several of his father's henchman unalived was the cause for his punishment Sorry - but I think I had too much coffee this morning and my mind is now officially off the rails
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Maybe I mis-configured the trap - but I thought a vehicle with flood lights (Hank) pulled onto the main road from a logging road to the right. Then Denton's Chevy pulled onto the main road from a logging road to the left. That would mean both Hank and Denton were lying in wait for Andrew. Hard to imagine they would cut down a tree just in hopes that Andrew might drive down this particular road. My Vulcan logic is saying "that is a highly improbable move Captain Kirk" ๐ Thus - a third party involvement Plus being tailed on a lonely deserted stretch of highway would have caught Andrew's attention even in his distracted state of mind
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It looks like Alex is having the mother of bad ideas and will soon be going off the rails. I have to think that if his parents had been more understanding and supportive, Alex's impending disaster might have been averted. Instead of shutting down the conversation - maybe his parents offering some sort of help - like for instance - assisting Alex in making contact with his lifelong friend Matty instead of choosing to not get further involved and acting like it is normal for parents to (permanently ?) send their only child (not sure if he is an only child) off to a distant relative. The banishment of Matty sounds like something that might have been normal in Charles Dickens time zone - Maybe Alex's parents read to many Dickens novels in their youth ๐
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Seems like there is a loose end here - Hank who was left with an injured ankle at the creek (or up the creek - may not have a paddle but his rifle may suffice) I think here is a saying - "dead men tell no tales" Andrew is probably is a bit of shock - I would guess it will be left to Walter to clean up the mess
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Really ? Will is pretty perceptive. He already knows Andrew is up to something probably dangerous. Two leaders no (not counting Hank) of the White Cross mysteriously disappear and Will is not going to know ?? That's going to be a bit of a sticky wicket ๐ค
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Seems like there is a puzzle piece missing - well I am puzzled at any rate An impromptu ambush was set up on a back road not normally used. To me - it seemed like Andrew's road choice was a bit random and not a road he could have been anticipated in advance to be on that night. So, someone else had to have been following Andrew to be able to know which road he was travelling on (after leaving the Merrick mansion}. Once Andrew turned onto Concession Road 4, this third party would then have had to contact Denton to relay Andrew's travel route to enable the trap to be set. That's my guess anyway
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You're hitting on a deep Truth here. (almost) Every monster in human form is a distorted twisted spirit of a once innocent child. (the infamous orcs of JRR Tolkiens Lord of the Rings - have a similar origin story - they didn't start out that way) It feels like you are touching on a much deeper tragedy of the chidren souls damaged beyond repair - who later become little toxic clouds of poison infecting everything they contact. Your little backstory revelation makes it a lot more difficult to fully despise Tarquin now. URGHH!
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Chapter Six - Dire Consequences.
zakynthos commented on William King's story chapter in Chapter Six - Dire Consequences.
Really great job capturing Alex's emotional state when coming out to his folks. I really felt the fear and anxiety he was feeling. Matty's parents silence is really cruel regardless of what they know or don't know. Poor Alex has to be wondering whether it is Matty or his parents decision to excommunicate Alex. AN explanation would have been kind and much appreciated. I havent read the previous story so I have know intel on Matty's parents but right now - they don't seem to good. Exiling their son is kind of an indication -
Systems are always subject to rot. Just like an old car that's never maintenanced. To be honest - many legal systems are designed with intentional loopholes to be exploited by the unscupulous. The rot exists but It's people that are doing the damage. We call the legal sytem - The Justice System - but in reality the idea of justice is just wishful thinking. No system can survive an overabundance of parasytes. A well built house can be destroyed by too many termites.
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Will and Andrew are connected at some sort of energetic soul level ( You dont really have to believe in soul - but I think everyone can accept energy is real) Their initial automatic and immediate connection (described in Carter's Army) was so powerful - neither could deny or dismiss it. This is a real phenomenon that can occur between two people that is more like merging as opposed to a connection or bonding. Once merged - you cannot really ever fully unmerge. Conclusion - they both are stuck with it - and with separation, they can only carry residual pain - They are kind of screwed or protected - depending on how you want to see it.
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Yah - it seems that it's a lesson that most can only learn thru bitter experience. Really harsh but also liberating to have to learn it when your too young to even cope let alone fight back. For Andrew - I guess it could be called a painful epiphany Really powerful chapter - on all fronts
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I think being without shelter and means makes a kid pretty - at risk.
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Chapter 176 Stepping Up to the Plate
zakynthos commented on Dodger's story chapter in Chapter 176 Stepping Up to the Plate
I am total agreement with your understanding of this very simple yet complex friendship between Robbie and Rory. I also have had the same opinion that Rory is wanting to explore something more with Robbie but at the same time doesn't see himself as being "gay" Classic approach/avoidance syndrome - which will always send out confusing and conflicting messages Another really important (I think) point you highlight is that Robby isn't fully aware of how important Rory's friendship is to him. I think that Rory has been and is Robby's only real true friend other than Amy ๐ Robby has a lot of "fairweather friends" (and lovers ) but through the entire story - Rory has been the only one that isn't using Robby in one way or another and that is because Rory truly is a solidy decent kind and true friend So to lose his only true friend would be a huge loss for Robby. -
Jason - running away to Toronto - underage and pennyless - Seems like he is jumping out of the frying pan into the fire. He got dealt some shitty cards from the bottom of the deck and he really got it that the game is rigged (as his dear dad told him). You can never win a rigged game. The only sane move left is to the game - and it seems that Jason really made the only move left that might get him free from a certain violent reprisal. I think it actually takes a lot of courage (and desperation) to head out unsupported. Needs a guardian spirit to intervene It's hard to watch when we got to see some signs of healing happening under Peters care
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"Will It Always Be Like This?"
zakynthos commented on Nuno R.F.C. Rendeiro's story chapter in "Will It Always Be Like This?"
Thanks for the great sendoff As a lover of geometry - and student of Pythagoras - You brought your beautiful tale to a complete circle. I really dont think it is possible to have found a better choice of endings - to end at the beginning - wow !!! Such a fine worl of art - my endorphins are gushing (that 's a good thing - really ๐) Reading thru the chapters - I found that I had to try not to rush myself even though I was in a hurry to find out was going to happen next. The reason I felt I needed to slow down was that I realized that sweet gentle lines of lyric poetry had been hidden within the vast field of prose. I became a sort of treasure hunter in search of these little gems {which I savored} Hudson's eyes were bright, turquoise even in the dark, catching stray stage light like water catching the moon On it sat a bucket of fries, hot, steaming, impossibly generous, salt glittering on top like tiny stars. the restaurant across the street like a ghost waiting to be touched. Just a few from mined from this chapter alone. The story is solid romantic and beautiful on its own - The lyrical nature of its telling is a reflection of the soul- 24 comments
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Thanks - really good advice I unwittingly wandered into into your Twilght Zone Merrickville vortex ๐ by landing headfirst into Granny's Doily Palace. (Seriously - Like the Twilight Zone there are many ways in Merrickville with with few ways to leave - I am now a dedicated fan/prisoner ) It was a ton of fun to read it snext o it acted kind of like a gateway drug for me as I followed you and Finn to Grady's Garage. Last few weeks I have (shamefully ) binged on the Carter Saga - and yes Carter's Shadow ( my favorite) does not disappoint. Having the backstory filled in brings a richer experience and deeper insight to this place and its inhabitants. You are absolutely correct that this story is a stand alone work but really I would advise readers to check out the Carter backstory - if they have some time on their hands
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Thanks - spoken with chagrin -
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โTheyโll see the kid who was braver than the Captain. ... Not trying to be a pain but - Peter refers to West as the "captain" . At that time frame - was West even out of Sandhurst - or at most just a lieutenant ?
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It seems that in addition to the Garage - the other Merrickville location where the writing goes off charts is the Brody house Topher's writer's brain seems to be on steroids whenever he takes us there The whole night terrors and the aftermath was so flooded with kindness compasson and connection at such a soulful level - it makes me want to consider revising my own cynical outlook and opinions of my species. Of course - right after the calm - Andrew's coffee shop confrontation immediately flips me 180 degrees back to my original cynicism. (thanks alot ๐) Fantastic chapter filled with great writing Seriously, Peter's honest caring kindness laced with humor serving as a gentle nudge to Jason allowing him to open up and unclench - was just beautiful to witness. AND - Adolescent wanking is always a touchy subject - but you handled it masterfully ๐
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Chapter 176 Stepping Up to the Plate
zakynthos commented on Dodger's story chapter in Chapter 176 Stepping Up to the Plate
Thanks for that observation - although it seems Robbie handles the Homophobic remarks well enough. It's the physical attack and followup threats that aren't so easy to just brush off. Of course his anger outburst should of been directed at the bullying prick but he was too scared to fight back (rightly so) - so he ends up attacking the one person who has been openly supportive at school - his actual real friend. Kind of sad really -
Chapter 176 Stepping Up to the Plate
zakynthos commented on Dodger's story chapter in Chapter 176 Stepping Up to the Plate
Kudos to Dodger - great chapter
