Readers of this story should be warned ahead of time for the following symptoms they will develop: 1. dehydration from the excess of tears 2. multiple heart attacks, not just towards the climax 3. sore eyes and neck for you won't be able to stop until you read every last word 4. die from sheer bliss for having been blessed with Mr. Cheese's writing Then they may proceed to read and re-read other stories by Hamen until they are actually blind