Jump to content

Chris Lewis Gibson

Archived Member
  • Posts

    25
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by Chris Lewis Gibson

  1. It is good to see you back after so long. I wonder, do you find yourself in the characters, or are they something completely different from you.
  2. Chris Lewis Gibson

    Travel Plans

    Someone else turned me onto this story, and I love your writing. It's so clear.
  3. Hello, I found your story. I wanted to know what kind of feed back you were looking for and how much writing you've done before?
  4. I actually skipped to the last chapter and decided to read backward. i had a sense that, because you started the story so long ago, reading these first chapters I was more reading the writer you were, than the writer you are. There is such a difference in the style of this chapter than in the very early ones. There is a clearer focus and a deeper concentration. The story flows so much better. But even at the very beginning there is something to this story. I mean it has a real soul to it. not every story does. This is just my take on it, but from the beginning until this point these characters are asserting their reality. Many times people are just making up characters, or just putting themselves on the page and changing the names, but I feel like Miracle and his friends are distinctly real people, not just extensions of yourself you play with for amusement.
  5. Well, Lisa points out how she sees Miracle equating sex with love and being hurt by every person he's with, but I see something else. Miracle is going toward people who do not love him, and drawn to people who will treat him badly. There actually are people who love him. I am guessing that he doesn't really feel worthy of love.Incidentally, why is his name Miracle, and why does he come from Australia?
  6. He is not really out of control yet. He is unwise and sexually adventurous, but not yet out of control. In fact, Miracle is a great deal like many young gay men I know. If there is any problem in the story, it is that you are not staying with the characters and scenes long enough. There is at least an extra page in the scene where Miracle stays in the room and is caught. All three of the people are going through some crazy emotions and that ought to be explored. It is the same with the last one. The sex is rushed. I don't mean that they have it too quickly, but that it isn't explored fully. This scene represents the beginning of something, so it's an important one. Don't be afraid to get graphic about it. The graphics of s sex scene--he fucks him hard, he fucks him tenderly, he screams when he comes, he moans or he cries when he comes, tells a lot about the emotions in the scene. The graphics are everything. You are writing a book where one of the main themes is sex, so don't be afraid to write about sex.
  7. I feel that so many gay people are actually afraid to write about gay sex, and to write about the desires which often fuel sex. Instead of going the route of telling a romance, or avoiding sexuality altogether, you have gone for something very raw here. One part I admired was the semen on Miracle and his partner's belly. It was not avoided, and it was not fetishized. You are gunning for reality here, and that is greatly to be admired.
×
×
  • Create New...